He laughed before his voice grew serious. “You do something to me.” She heard his pause as he struggled for words. “It kinda freaks me out a bit. I like it.”
Her hesitation only gave her a moment to envision the kiss as if it had happened, his lips a breath from hers before their mouths met, colliding warm against the cool night air. She could almost feel his sweater fisted in her hands.
“Me too,” she managed.
“Plus, if you see me again? I can almost guarantee I’ll kiss you,” he added.
“If I let you,” she teased.
“Hey now,” he said, sounding hurt.
She burst out laughing. “My kisses need to be earned, Lover Boy. But they are very worth it.” She snapped the phone shut. Always leave them wanting more, she thought smiling. She’d have to thank him for the advice.
Chapter 3
He’s kissing a dead girl. Gabriel dove again as a wave crashed against his back, letting the momentum carry him a few feet closer to the shore. On the beach, Eden and Az were on a blanket, tangled around each other. You have to tell him, Gabriel thought.
“But she’s not dead yet.” The harsh whisper grated out before his lips pressed together.
Even now her laughter mixed with the smash of the surf. He twisted sideways as another whitecap pounded past and she waved at him as if she’d never been happier to be alive. Gabriel forced his hand up, rocked it once before letting it drop back to the water and then waded to shore.
Where is she hiding it? he thought. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting. He’d nursed Az through depressions deep enough to last years, but this was different. Eden was different. Would she fade into skin and bones, die from the inside first? Would it be obvious, when her impending undeath crept closer, claimed her mortal life and spat her back as something other?
Gabriel dropped onto the blanket and toweled off. He’d put off checking Eden’s path too long anyway. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Az so happy, not having to struggle against the Fall. He couldn’t deny it had to do with Eden. And now it was all going to end. He should have told Az the second he’d gotten back from Upstairs.
Eden’s skin glistened with sunscreen, tan and healthier than she’d looked two weeks ago. She leaned against Az in a comfortable silence. A summer romance, Gabriel told himself as he looked the pair of them over. And now summer was almost gone.
“Gonna come with us?” Eden asked suddenly. “We’re getting something to eat.”
Gabriel shook his head.
She leaned toward him, her voice falling to a conspiratorial whisper. “We can check out the hot boys in the arcade?”
He couldn’t look at her. She might be Az’s girlfriend, but Gabe had grown tight with her, too. Scoping out eye candy on the boardwalk after Az had fallen asleep, even the stupid judge shows she and Gabriel hated to love. Everything would eventually be labeled ‘the last time.’ He couldn’t bring himself to start counting down yet. “I’m suffering from a lack of awesome today. Think I’ll sit out this time.”
Eden groaned in mock frustration, scooting away. “Ugh! You’re killing me, Gabe!” He startled before he could stop himself.
“Everything okay?” It was Az who spoke.
Gabriel pressed his lips together, forcing himself to meet Az’s eyes.
Az turned to Eden. “Hey, can you give us a minute?”
Gabriel wasn’t sure what Az had seen, what he had given away, but it had been enough.
“I’ll text you when I’m on my way, okay?”
Az reached for her hand, led her a few steps away. From behind him, Gabriel heard the soft sound of their kiss, broken fragments of her concern for him.
Gabriel kept his head hung when Az dropped onto the blanket next to him, face hidden behind his blond curls. For once he was glad he’d let them shag out, though he’d spent the last month bitching about the lack of New York quality stylists.
“What’s wrong?” Az asked, pulling up his knees, throwing an arm out behind him for balance.
Gabriel raised his head, staring across the water, focused far past the horizon line. The knot of dread tightened in his stomach.
“I went Upstairs last night.” He turned toward Az as he spoke, watching for the reaction. A shiver passed across Az’s shoulders but there was nothing more.
“You didn’t mention you were going Upstairs.”
“Because it bothers you,” Gabriel said, quietly. Az scoffed.
“I hardly think of that place at all.” His voice stayed casual, but the rest of him failed miserably. He blinked hard, as if it would be enough to hide the rusted tinge to his irises, the anger turning their color. His shoulders were rigid, his hands clenched into fists.
Gabriel turned back to the water. “It’s about Eden.”
“No!” Az jumped to his feet. “This time is different! I can feel it, Gabriel. I don’t care what she was supposed to be doing.”
People were staring, Frisbees falling forgotten. Gabe felt sick. Az had never shown up on a mortal’s path. Every relationship he’d been in, the girl eventually left him, going back to the path she’d been meant to be living, meeting the people destined to be part of her story and leaving Az behind. A footnote. Forgotten. Only twice had they not. Luke had gotten to them first.
Gabriel wouldn’t let that happen to Eden. He bit his lip, hoping the pain would keep the tears unshed. “Az, it’s worse.” His vision blurred. “She’s...”
“What do you mean worse?”
“She has no path.” Gabe said. The words crackled in the air between them. Out on the water, a gull screamed. The color drained from Az’s face.
“You made a mistake,” Az said. “Just because she doesn’t have a path doesn’t mean—”
Gabriel cut him off with a shake of his head. “You know what it means.”
“Eden’s not one of them. She’s not a Sider.” Az glared, no longer repressing the red flare in his eyes.
“I’m sorry.” It was all Gabriel could think of to say. He caught the change in Az’s eyes even before his breathing went shallow, was on his feet when the color of his eyes shifted to bruised purple. Only half Fallen, Az struggled to keep from going full. The prospect of losing Eden had tipped him, darkened his thoughts.
“Did I do this? Did I mess up her path?” Az stopped dead, his sudden stillness disconcerting.
The normal path of a mortal spread out like a tree with thousands of tiny branches. Every choice diverted them to a new future. Rarely, they strayed into uncharted territory—like the girls Az had dated over his time down here—but it never lasted.
Gabriel softened his voice. “Of course not. This isn’t your fault.” Az knew a Bound angel couldn’t lie, but when he looked up his eyes hadn’t lightened. “You can’t affect mortals that way. It’s impossible.”
“A Sider.” Gabriel heard the change in Az’s voice. “She has no path.” He paused. “I’m not taking her away from anything. That’s why she hasn’t left me. Right?”
Gabriel winced.
“I think I love her, Gabriel.” The ache in his voice was painful to hear. “I didn’t mean to. I know it puts her in danger, but I can’t lose her. She makes me happy.”
Gabriel managed a smile. “I know she does.” He hesitated, not wanting to set Az off again. “But it’s been two weeks. That’s not love. Not yet.”
Az was quiet for a long moment. “You knew,” he spat.
Gabe looked up in surprise. “No. I swear.”
“So, what? We came all the way to fucking Jersey to get away from your obsession with the Suiciders, and you just happened to stumble on her?” He drew a breath, choked the words out between clenched teeth. “You pointed her out to me. Did you set me up?”
“I didn’t know. She was so sad.…” There was a reason they called them Suiciders, the undead Gabriel had discovered, still trapped in their mortal bodies, unable to move on. His mouth dropped open as the realization hit him. “Oh God. She was planning it out.”
&n
bsp; “What are you talking about?”
“The night we met her, I caught her thoughts.” He swallowed hard. “It was like she was screaming for help. I figured she was just depressed but, Az, I think she was going to become one of them then.”
“So we helped her? She’s not depressed anymore.”
Careful, Gabe thought to himself as he chose his words. He couldn’t give Az hope. “Without a path, there’s no future to save. She’s already off the map.”
“You’ve never found a Sider before they changed,” Az argued.
Gabriel focused on the corner of the blanket, peeling it back. Underneath the sand was cool and damp against his fingers.
“We’ll stop it,” Az said. He turned, searching the Boardwalk above for Eden. “We’ll save her. There has to be a way.”
Gabriel rubbed his temples. The throbbing there was getting worse by the second.
“Kristen?” Az said hesitantly. “You can ask Kristen.”
Gabriel’s mouth opened, a dozen protests clustering there before he licked his lips. It wasn’t an entirely bad idea. Still, Az’s reply had been more question than answer, and with good reason. Kristen was one of the first Suiciders. It wasn’t that she wouldn’t help; she owed Gabriel more favors than Az would ever know. The problem was, well, it was Kristen.
Worse, she was the best option.
“I’ll head to the Bronx tomorrow. See what she says.”
Chapter 4
Az opened the door to the hotel room. One glance at Eden as she entered, and he shifted his expression to sympathy.
“No job?”
“The lady said she forgot she had an interview for the position! Forgot!” Eden caught his hand as she passed and plopped both of them onto the bed. The springs groaned achingly. “She looked at me like I was nuts for being there!” Eden’s shoulders slumped. “She said the position had been filled.”
She’s already disappearing, he thought, trying to keep his emotions under control. It was one of the signs Gabe had told him to watch for, the mortals slowly replacing her in their minds. Soon, she wouldn’t exist to them at all.
So far, it’d been easy to hide his eyes. He knew they’d be a paler blue today, but doubted she’d notice. He moved behind her on the bed just in case, rubbing her shoulders. “It’s not so bad. I’m sure you’ll get the next one.”
Getting a job was such a small thing, yet meant so much to her. He leaned over her shoulder, kissing her neck. So many things she’d be missing out on. There’s still a chance Kristen will know a way to stop this, he reminded himself.
“I need a car.” She closed her eyes, leaning into him.
“I’m within walking distance.”
“I need a paycheck more. It’s just, I know you and Gabe are only here for the summer. I want to be able to come see you in New York.”
He sensed her hesitation, draped his arms over her shoulders, and hugged her. They hadn’t talked about what would happen when summer ended. He murmured her name. “There’s always the train. We’ll get you to New York safe. I promise.”
He pressed his lips together before he gave away too much, but she only nodded, breaking into a smile. How many more did she have? Would she be the same when she became a Sider?
Would she still love him?
Even now, Gabe was on his way to Kristen’s. He’d find a way to stop this, to save Eden.
“You’re staring at me,” she said.
He didn’t answer, pulling her with him as he leaned back on the bed. Everything about her felt numbered.
His lips wandered down her neck, across her collarbone, her breath coming faster as he followed the curve of her tank top down. He kissed her hard, his lips greedy. He wanted her, the need hitting him in a rush. Wanted her now, while she was mortal. Her fingers grabbed suddenly at the bottom of his shirt, lifting. He rolled onto his back, stifling a groan, knowing he’d killed the moment. Again.
“Tease.” She smacked his chest. The playfulness dropped from her tone. “Why do you always pull away?” Eden asked.
He moved carefully, adjusting until he leaned against the headboard.
“You’re right,” he said. His fingers toyed with the hem of his shirt. He could tell her. Explain. “I do pull away.”
“Do you not want to?” she asked.
He shook his head. “It’s not that at all, trust me.” The bed creaked as she crawled closer and laid her head on his chest. His arm curled around her.
“Then what is it?” she whispered.
He tipped her head up, stole another kiss. He could smell her skin, the heat of her in the small room. “It’s not you.”
She whipped around to face him, her eyes blazing. “Jesus, I hate it when you pull this shit.” She made for the edge of the bed, but he grabbed her shoulder. “One minute you’re feeding me lines about seeing you in New York, and the next you act like you don’t even want me to touch you.”
You’re going to lose her. The thought dug in. Every inch separating them tunneled into miles. You’re losing her already.
When she spoke, only the shake in her voice betrayed any emotion. “I need to know what’s going to happen when summer ends. I need to know if this is just a temporary thing for you.”
“Eden, no!” He reached for her hand again. This time she let him take it. “This isn’t ‘temporary’ for me. Not since the moment I saw you on the beach.”
Her eyes flicked away. “Because I think I’m… I think...” She swallowed hard.
Quicksilver happiness coated his insides, whisking away the dark thought, but his smile was because of her alone.
“I know it’s too soon and it probably freaks you out but—”
“Stop. I love you, too, Eden.” He wanted to say it again, loving the sound of her name paired with those words, knowing how true they were even as Gabriel’s voice toyed at the back of his mind. It’d been weeks. Not even a season. How could she mean so much to him so quickly?
She relaxed for a beat as she reached to stroke his cheek.
“Then what’s wrong? Tell me.” She squeezed his hand, leaning forward, tucking her head against his neck.
He closed his eyes, knowing his fear would stain them yellow.
“Just…don’t freak out, okay?” He raised her from his shoulder, caught her gaze for a split second before he lifted his shirt over his head.
“What’s wrong with your eyes?” she asked quietly.
He didn’t answer, couldn’t look at her as he began slowly unwinding the ace bandage around his chest.
“Az?”
“So, usually I get one of two reactions,” he said, his voice quaking. He pulled off all but the last loop of material and glanced up. “I blame the corsets for the fainters. They wore them so tight… couldn’t breathe right. But the fashion’s been out of style for centuries, so I think we’re good on that one.”
“Centuries?” Her voice had gone up an octave. “What’s wrong with your eyes?” she demanded.
“They turn yellow when I’m scared,” he said, keeping as calm as he could manage.
“Scared?”
She was still talking. So far, so good. But he knew what he showed her next would be enough to send any mortal over the edge. She’s different, he promised himself.
“Yeah, scared.” He dropped the last of the bandages. His cramped muscles begged to stretch but he did his best to hold them tight. “The screaming I can handle. Being called a devil, a witch, a freak.” He climbed off the bed, backing away to the middle of the room. “But what will happen to me if you decide you don’t want me in your life anymore?”
“You’re not making sense. What are you talking about?” She’d risen onto her knees, her hands held in front of her, eyes darting to the door and back. He didn’t dare move. “Az?”
He heard the uncertainty in her voice, knew every moment he delayed made it worse. His head dropped as he forced himself to roll his shoulders, the wings uncurling from their cavity behind his ribcage. When he flexed them, a
ll fourteen feet of the atrocious things spanned the room. Joints at odd angles, so they folded in like a pterodactyl, feathers layered across the leathered skin. Nothing about them was beautiful. They were a punishment.
“I’m an angel, Eden.” A feathered tip brushed the TV stand, knocking an open can of soda to the carpet. Her silence was worse than any screaming.
He fought to hold onto his last grain of calm, keep under control. His cell phone was in his pocket. If things went bad, if he felt tempted to Fall, one phone call, and Gabriel could get there in seconds.
An unsure giggle broke from the bed, building into a laugh. His eyes shot up, found Eden doubled over on the covers. His wings lifted, the feathers rustling quietly in his confusion.
“You’re ridiculous!” She took a deep breath, wiping her eyes, trying to get her giggling under control. “And you owe me a Coke, too!” she said, pointing to the can, the liquid soaking into the carpet.
He opened his mouth, but when nothing came out she hopped from the bed, crossing the room to him. Az stared at her, not sure what to say.
“Did Gabe put you up to this?” she asked. Her fingers traced one of the feathers. “He’s that pissed that I kicked his ass in skeeball? I never figured you two for prank types. Though this is beyond awesome.” She gave a joint of his left wing a hard squeeze. Az grimaced, knowing she felt the bones grinding. “These things are like, movie prop worthy. Where’d you get them?”
She rounded his shoulder for a better look, and he knew it was over.
A sharp intake of breath and then, “You have holes in your back.”
He nodded slowly. “The wings tuck in. Most times a sweatshirt is enough to hide them.”
His anatomy had been rearranged, concave scoops on either side of a spine lined in muscles, where the wings attached inside. A thin layer of skin hid blood and bone along his ribcage.
“Wings?” She took a step away, her voice shaking. “You were hiding wings?”
“It’s not exactly something that goes in a personal ad, Eden. Enjoys long walks on the beach and sarcastic girls. Bird fetish a plus. Can I put them away now?” he whispered, his head hung low. When she didn’t answer, he contracted his shoulders, then folded the wings back in, and grabbed for his shirt in a single motion. He put it on, hiding his shame.
The Siders Box Set Page 2