“Nothing,” I said quickly. “I’m glad things are going okay tonight.”
Still she smiled at me in that knowing way, blotting her lips with a napkin, putting her cellphone away. Sometimes, I felt like Haley could see right through me. She probably dealt with assholes all day and night who were attracted to her. I was just another in a long line of annoyances.
“How’s your night going, Chuck?” she asked, folding her arms above her chest and leaning back, relaxing in the booth. “Did you get over whatever was plaguing you yesterday?”
And, ah, at the mention of yesterday, of the way I had to search for its source of misery in my mind, my grief over my sister washed over me anew. It felt like it had laid in wait for this moment only to ambush me at the slightest sign of me trying to be happy, attempting to be normal. I should just come to terms with the fact that I would never get past this, never be rid of this sadness.
“Chuck?” Haley’s green eyes were wide, and fixed on me, and she’d unfolded her arms. One of her hands was resting on my bicep so lightly I hadn’t even noticed when she’d placed it there. “I obviously said the wrong thing. Forgive me.”
I shook my head and gave her a small smile. “You didn’t do anything wrong. You were just asking me about my day.”
“It was a bad one, huh?” She rubbed my arm in a strangely comforting way. “I have those sometimes. Days when I don’t want to leave my bed, let alone the house.”
I swallowed hard, uncertain. “I’m guessing the other guys told you all about it already.”
She gave me a look. “What makes you say that?”
“Because that was how I was yesterday, and they’re terrible gossips.”
“I’m with you on the terrible gossips front,” she agreed, chuckling. “But none of them said anything to me about it. Ace just thanked me for calling you, and that was that.”
I pondered that one, more than a little relieved that none of them had called me out in front of Haley. That meant that they probably sensed how serious my issues were surrounding my sister.
“It’s perfectly common to have bad days,” Haley was assuring me. “Nothing to be ashamed about.”
“Thanks for saying that.”
“I’m not just saying it.” She stood up from the booth and stretched. “You have my number, Chuck. If you ever get to feeling down like that againor anytime don’t hesitate to call me. Okay?”
“Okay,” I said, uncertain of myself.
“Promise?”
“Okay, I will.”
“All right, I believe you.” She winked at me, sassy again. “Let me know if you need anything tonight, too.”
“Tonight?”
“In the way of drinks.” She raised her eyebrows at me, their message clearwhat else had I expected? before walking over to take the orders of a group of people who had just sat down at a table.
“Well, that was interesting,” Jack said, he and Brody staring at me steadily.
“Fuck,” I grumbled. “I forgot you guys were here.”
“She does tend to have that effect,” Brody said, a little too wistful for my liking.
“That’s a workplace ethics violation for you, I will remind you,” I said, feeling my face going hot.
Brody put his hands up. “Call dibs if you want to call dibs, Chuck. None of us are going to stop you.”
“Unless one of us calls dibs first,” Sloan said, scratching a pen casually against a napkin. He looked up at me, smiling wickedly. “Are you going to call dibs, or should I?”
“I hate this game,” I said. “Haley can pursue whoever she likes. Us calling dibs on someone is disgusting.”
“He’s not going to call dibs, is he?” Brody commented, like I wasn’t even sitting at the table anymore.
“I don’t even think Chuck knows what he’s going to do,” Jack observed, his eyes dancing with mirth.
“Look, I drew this picture of you and Haley,” Sloan said, shoving the napkin across the table at me. “If you end up getting married, you could frame this.”
“No one’s marrying anyone,” I grumbled, taking the napkin anyway. Sloan wasn’t a talented artist when he was sober, and being drunk certainly didn’t improve things. Two stick figuresone with flowing hair, big lips, and exaggerated eyelashes, and the other with a bald head and hearts for eyes sat together at a booth. The stick figure with hearts for eyes, clearly me, was obviously struck dumb by the other figure, clearly Haley. Sloan had included two additional stick figures on the other side of a crude table exchanging rectangular boxes with dollar signs on them…
“You all did not make a bet on this,” I said, angry, looking up at them.
Jack and Brody’s eyes widened in the very picture of innocence.
“Why would you say such a thing?” Jack asked.
I showed them the napkin. “Sloan caught you in the act.”
“Aw, come on, Sloan,” Brody complained. “Get your shit together.”
“I have also included a self-portrait,” Sloan informed me, tapping his pen against the napkin. I’d missed the fifth stick figure, surrounded by bottles of booze and beautiful women and stacks of rectangular boxes with dollar signs in them. He was obviously having a good day, a line drawing of a rainbow extending over his head, musical notes bordering it, and a sunshine with sunglasses.
“Why does the sunshine need sunglasses?” Jack observed, squinting at the depiction. “Does his own brightness make him squint? How does he live like that?”
“The sun’s wearing sunglasses because he’s a badass,” Sloan explained. “And he’s sitting with me because I’m a badass.”
“You know, maybe we should frame this after all,” Brody said. “I’m sure sober Sloan would be really interested in what drunk Sloan got up to while he was gone.”
I shook my head at the good-natured ribbing that began and looked out across the bar, hoping that Haley wasn’t on her way over here to check on us. I had no idea what she would think of Sloan’s little doodles, and I didn’t want to embarrass her even if the rest of the guys seemed pretty intent on embarrassing me.
When my eyes finally did light on her, I froze in some combination of horror, panic, and confusion.
One of the bar patronsa big guy who I’d never seen before in the establishment had backed Haley into a corner and was looming over her in a matter that could only be deemed as threatening. How had none of the other guys noticed this? It was off toward the hallway leading to the bathrooms and the office, so it was out of Ace’s line of sight, and he was busy readying mixed drinks and pouring shots and arranging buckets of beer for various tables. Of course, Haley was supposed to be running those buckets and shots and drinks to different tables, but Ace hadn’t noticed her absence, yet. In fact, none of the patrons were even looking that way.
The guy shifted a little, and I slid to the edge of the booth seat as soon as I saw Haley’s mouth moving, the corners of it pulled down, her brows drawn together, angry. Her shoulders hunched forward protectively even as she leaned back away from him, and I could read that like a shouted declaration of “fuck you” even if I was too far away to hear any of the actual words of the conversation.
“Chuck?”
I didn’t even acknowledge having heard my name, didn’t even know who’d spoke it. I was already standing, tension winding its way up my spine, fists tightening, and when the guy grabbed Haley by the arm and jerked her toward him even as she scrambled back, shouting, I was already halfway across the room, anticipating just this move.
Because I knew what happened when men treated women like that. I knew just how far it could go, how quickly it could escalate. And I didn’t know who this guy was to Haley, or if she even knew him, but I knew he was done cornering her like that, touching her like that. Because I was done standing idly by.
Without so much as a preamble, I took him by the shoulder, dimly registering Haley’s eyes going wide, and ripped him away from her so quickly that he let go of her arm in surpris
e.
“Hands off,” I told him, halfway surprised that I still had the power of speech.
“Fuck off,” he spat in my face. “I’m talking to this bitch.”
And, wow, that was about the worst thing he could’ve thought to say. I didn’t care about the “fuck off” part, especially since it was going to be my dearest ambition to get him to fuck off back to wherever he came from. The worst thing was the “bitch” part, because I knew that was directed at Haley, and I couldn’t stand that. She wasn’t a bitch. Even if she called herself one, even if Katie, from time to time, affectionately referred to her as one, she wasn’t a bitch. And no man had a right to call her that in derision or dismissal or anger.
“Apologize,” I said, glancing at Haley, who was shaking so hard she had to cling to the wall to remain. “Apologize to her right now.”
“Fuck her, and fuck you.” Spittle flecked his lips, like he was some kind of mad dog or something. “She doesn’t deserve anything except my fist on her face to teach her a lesson.”
A red tide of rage rose in me, and on the edge of it, I heard Haley screaming, Sloan cheering, the rest of the guys shouting, felt the dull shock of my fist connecting with a face, again and again and again.
Because it couldn’t happen like this again. Not to Haley. Not to anyone I knew. Not when I could do something about it.
Not when I could hit, and hit, and hit, and make the problem go away and never come back.
Chapter 4
“Chuck, you have to stop.”
“Calm down. Come on, bud.”
“Fuck it, let him at that asshole. You all saw what happened. Hell, let me at that asshole.”
“You’re not helping, Sloan, dammit.”
Someone was crying it sounded like a woman. I hoped it wasn’t Chelsea. If he’d hurt my sister, I would…
…only my sister was dead. I blinked, realized I was struggling to pull away from Jack and Ace, and sagged in their arms.
“Are you back here with us, bud?” Ace asked, still hanging on to me, a determined glint in his eyes.
“He’s back,” Jack determined, and let go. “Aren’t you, Chuck?”
“What the hell?” I muttered, feeling like I was having an out-of-body experience.
“Remind me to never get on Chuck’s bad side,” Sloan said brightly. Brody had both of his arms twisted behind his back, but that didn’t seem to affect Sloan’s mood in the slightest. He leaned back and kicked out almost joyfully, and Brody muttered a few choice curses, dragging Sloan back.
“If you don’t behave yourself, Sloan, I’m going to let the cops take you away and put you in the drunk tank,” Katie said. “Jesus. Did you all know he was such a brawler?”
“He’s usually sweet,” Ace said, looking sorry as he let go of my arm. “It was probably just the atmosphere.”
“You mean it was my fault,” I said. “Because it is.”
“I like fighting,” Sloan said. “You can fight me on that.”
“No more fighting tonight,” Brody said, giving him a shake. “Promise? I’ll let you go if you promise me.”
“I’m pretty tired,” Sloan agreed. “And I could go for tacos. But you all have to admit that this asshole had it coming.”
I looked at where Sloan was pointing and recoiled. Laid out on the ground was the guy who had been hassling Haley, bleeding heavily from his face.
“Fuck,” I said, covering my eyes. “Fuck.”
“You’re fine,” Jack assured me. “Everything’s fine. He’s breathing. He’s just out cold.”
“Which is for the best, honestly,” Brody said, shaking his head. “The jerk was saying some awful things.”
“Where’s Haley?” I asked. “Is Haley okay?”
“I’m fine.” The crying had stopped, and I turned to see her, mascara-dyed tear streaks staining her cheeks. She wiped her face abruptly, realizing what I was looking at.
“You’re crying, and this guy was bothering you,” I said, pointing at him with my foot. Jack put his hand on my arm, drawing me back a little. “I’m good, man. Haley, truthfully, are you doing okay? Did he hurt you physically?”
“All he did was shove me and try to grab me,” she said, rolling her eyes. “It’s nothing I haven’t dealt with before. You didn’t have to come barreling in to save the day.”
“You were yelling at him,” I reminded her.
“Yelling at him to get his fucking hands off me,” she said. “Honestly, I say that about once or twice a week. Usually in a friendlier tone, because I don’t want to alienate good tippers.”
“But you’re crying.”
“Yes, and?”
“Doesn’t crying usually mean that you’re sad, or hurt?”
“These are tears of rage,” Haley said, examining the mascara debris on the pads of her thumbs. “Don’t confuse them.”
“Amen,” Katie murmured. “Amen to that.”
“I’m…sorry,” I said awkwardly. “I kind of just acted without thinking.”
“Police are on their way, Chuck,” Katie told me. “Someone called them. I swear it wasn’t me.”
“Are you going to arrest me?” I asked Katie, my voice dull, my body numb. I knew I should be feeling something, knew from the blood on that asshole’s face that my knuckles should be aching, but I didn’t feel anything.
“Chuck, I’m off duty,” she said, her voice shaking a little. “I’m not going to arrest you, but I can’t make promises for any of my colleagues.”
“It’s okay,” I said. “I know I probably deserve to go to jail.”
“I saw everything, Chuck,” Katie said, tucking a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “I’ll vouch for you.”
“We’ll all vouch for you,” Ace assured me. “Can I interest you in some ice for those knuckles?”
“They don’t hurt,” I said, my voice sounding like it was coming from far away.
“They might not hurt now,” Jack reasoned, “but you hurt them on this fucker’s face. Put some ice on them. Those are magic hands. You need them to be okay.”
“Magic hands?” Haley asked, quirking an eyebrow at me. Her lips trembled, but she tried for a smile anyway. “Have you been hiding something from me, Chuck?”
“He’s just talking about my mechanic work,” I said, drawing in a breath at the coldness of the bag of ice Ace placed gingerly on my hands.
“Just his mechanic work?” Jack slapped my back heartily, and I knew he was just as shaken up as the rest of us. “The man’s a poet with a wrench in his fist and an engine block in his face. You should see the piece of shit he’s fixing up for me right now. Just mechanic work? The man is a prophet. He resurrects.”
“He’s drunk,” Sloan croaked, and we laughed helplessly, Ace handing Sloan a bag of ice of his own. He had apparently gotten in on the fight, too. The man on the ground stirred, and Brody lunged forward to pull him up. I realized, in a flash of clarity, that Brody was protecting him from us; that he might have even been afraid that one of us was going to snap and kill the asshole. It would be bad press for the bar, sure, but I didn’t believe for a moment that Brody was protecting us from the asshole. The guy looked like he was ready to keel over at any moment, and a sick shot of pleasure mingled with my dismay at the entire situation. He shouldn’t have touched Haley like that. He shouldn’t have said those things. No one should ever think they had the right to do either of those things, and the guy had acted like he had been completely entitled, like Haley had been something less than human to him. It was enough to make me see red again, and I finally understood what Brody was doing keeping me from doing something I might regret.
“Okay, cops are here,” Brody said, shaking the other guy by the collar. “Ready to tell them what an asshole you are?”
“Fuck you,” the guy groaned, and Brody shook him even harder.
“This guy,” he said, rolling his eyes. “This guy doesn’t know when to stay down.”
“That bitch needs to be put down,” the guy mumbled,
spitting a bloody gob of saliva on the floor.
I didn’t even know I was winding up to punch him until Ace dragged my fist back.
“I’ll make you swallow your words, motherfucker,” I vowed, red tinging my vision. “Say one more goddamn thing. Please. Please do it.”
“Chuck, please.” Haley hung on to my other arm, and I could feel that her entire body was shaking from the shock of it all. “They’re only words. I’m fine.”
Brody muscled the guy to the door and all of me went limp again, out of adrenaline and so tired. Katie followed them out, and I could see the flashes of red and blue lights from the cruiser parked outside the bar.
“Hey, sit down, bud.” Ace was dragging a chair over to me even as I shook my head. “You look like you’re about to fall down.”
I took a seat reluctantly and the rest of my friends relaxed, pulling up chairs around me. Jack got a pitcher of water from behind the bar and a stack of plastic cups, and Sloan put his head down on the table and started snoring almost instantly. At some point between me beating the shit out of the guy who had accosted Haley and the cops showing up, the regulars had cleared out of the bar. I wasn’t sure if they’d taken their own initiative to do it, or if Brody had shooed them out. I guessed it really didn’t matter. I was just curious. Something to take my mind off all of this.
Katie came back inside the bar, and a couple of guys in uniform followed.
“You guys? My friends here want to ask you some questions,” she said. “Would you indulge them, please?”
“Use the booth,” Jack said, jerking his thumb over his shoulder. “It’s more comfortable, and we can all take turns.”
I went first, since I was the one who had done most of the work on that asshole. I simply explained what had happened, careful to keep my voice neutral, my shoulders hunched, trying to not look like I was a threat. I could go to jail for this. I could be charged with assault with deadly intent. I’d been a cop before, once, a long time ago. I knew all the various ways I could get entangled in the law, even if I had just been trying to help Haley.
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