His sardonic gaze deepened into an open smirk as he clearly read her mind. "So how are ya, Vivvie? It's been a while since we've seen each other." He scratched his head like a yokel and fell into a slouch. "And I seem to remember," he drawled, "that you were wearing a lot less."
* * *
Chapter Five
All of the gratitude and goodwill Vivien had felt for J.B. drained from her once his words, said tauntingly, were delivered like a slap in public. As if he needed to take back his human, sympathetic response to her choking and throttle it .
She fixed him with her coldest courtroom stare, while behind her Julia said, "Yikes." Roman looked as if he'd rather be anywhere else. J.B. just smiled blandly.
"At least I wasn't dangling my meat in a hotel hallway, Sweet Pea," she volleyed back. At the next table, a heavyset man with a handlebar mustache spit water all over his salad, while his wife looked as if she might faint.
In fact, the entire restaurant looked on with great interest, but Vivien refused to blush, or bat an eyelash. She remained as white and shameless as Sargent's famous painting of Madame X.
"Nice return," J.B. said, nodding.
How dare he be magnanimous? "Dirty serve."
"Well, what would you expect from those of us who didn't grow up on Park Avenue? You know, the Great Unwashed."
"A little Southern courtesy."
"I'm polite as can be to a lady , darlin'. You don't qualify."
Viv noticed that even the chef's mouth was agape, and the flambeed whatever-it-was he held had become a raging culinary fire. What the hell. She'd play his game. This was nothing compared to some of the divorces she'd handled.
"Actually, I do qualify," she shot back, needing to win, as usual.
"Pardon me?"
Oh, don't say it, Viv. You're just giving him free ammo . "Since my father is an earl, I inherited an English title." She didn't mention the part about how he'd been a broke earl, who badly needed an influx of American cash to ward off selling his ancestral pile in the English countryside. It was a story straight out of a Regency novel.
J.B. actually laughed. "I should have guessed. The Divorce Diva has an effin' title ." He made a show of bowing to her. "Charmed, milady."
"I don't use it ." I don't even like the concept of a title. It's embarrassing Why am I explaining this ?
He rocked back on his heels and looked down his nose at her. "But you sure did use me , didn't you, darlin'? I guess you got me confused with one of the servants."
A long pause ensued, and Viv looked away, trying to calm her blood down from boiling to a mild sim mer. I am not going to explain my actions in front of a crowd .
Then Roman said quietly, "Maybe you two should take this outside, J.B."
Anglin rounded on him, his expression mock genial. "Aw, c'mon. Let's play court. We've got two lawyers: Viwie and me. We've got a built-in jury" He gestured to Cuvee's patrons. "And we can introduce all the evidence. Julia, here, can act as judge."
"That's enough, Anglin." Viv's voice, to her own ears, could have frozen vodka. "Roman's right. We need to take this outside."
"Suddenly shy, Counselor? You're used to center stage. Hitch up your skirt and let's dance." His eyes blazed a challenge at her.
Sheltons didn't back down from challenges. They normally issued them. However, this was neither the time nor the place to verbally dance with the man.
She raised her chin. "Bring it outside or I'm leaving."
"So leave."
She tossed some bills onto the table. "Roman, it was a pleasure to meet you. Julia, I'll see you later." She moved to the door.
Anglin opened fire again. "I'm surprised to see you run away, Your Majesty."
"Don't try to manipulate me. I'm not running. I just don't see the point of discussing this in public. And why did you just save my life, only to assassinate my character?"
"For fun," he drawled. "Pissed because you feel like a puppet ? That's a shame. It's not a pleasant feeling, is it, Vivvie?"
She opened the door.
"What comes around goes around, Counselor. You just remember that."
Viv walked calmly out of Cuvee and headed for Orange Street and Marv's Motor Inn. Julia ran after her.
"Would you care to explain to me what that was all about?"
"No." Viv lengthened her stride.
"I've never seen J.B. obnoxious like that! What did you do?"
Viv stopped and turned. "Never? And you've known him for what, three weeks? Yet you assume that I did something to deserve that."
"Vivver, it's not his style. And what did you mean, he dangled his meat in the hotel hallway? Come on. I'm your friend. Just tell me."
"Isn't it obvious? I'm a cold, evil, ball-busting bitch. I used him for sex and then threw him out naked into the hallway. Just for fun. Just because I could." She clenched her jaw.
"No. I don't believe that."
"He does."
"So why don't you set him straight?"
Viv sighed. "What's the point?"
Julia actually stamped her tiny foot. "You are the strangest person. Obviously it hurts you that J.B. thinks that. But you won't do anything about it? You're a lawyer, for God's sake. You talk for a living.
So go and talk to him and tell him why you did whatever you did. And if you don't tell me what it was and why, then I will dye your hair pink for my wedding. I'll sneak in while you sleep!"
Viv had to grin at Julia's latest threat.
"You're like a guy when it comes to your emotions. Did you know that? You just clam up and won't talk. It's maddening ."
"Like a guy?" Viv thought about it. "I suppose, given my mother's histrionics, I chose the polar opposite tack."
"Well," said Julia, "it's not healthy."
Viv threw up her hands. "I'll start shrieking and practicing voodoo on men right away. Just for my health, you understand."
Julia folded her arms and waited.
Viv sighed. "We went back to the hotel after dancing a little at the black-tie event. We you know. And he" Viv paused, trying to block out the memories. "He made me cry. I kicked him out."
"What do you mean, he made you cry? Did he hurt you, Viv? Oh, sweet Jesus"
"No! No, not at all. Hell . I'm not sure I can explain this." She closed her eyes and rubbed at her lids, trying to massage the tension out of her head.
"Try," ordered Julia.
"He was incredible. So tender and giving and and not a wimp about it, if you know what I mean. HeJulia, I'm not going into it, I'm not the kiss-and-tell type, but I'll just say that he made me, um, very happy. But before I knew it, I was in tears. I was about to lose itI don't know why. And all of these images flashed into my mind: me, addicted to this guy like crack; him disgusted by it, and turning mean and leaving. I could see the end of our relationship, the very messy end, before it even began. I felt hysterical, nutso.
"He asked me what was wrong, and I told him I suffered from allergies. I got up and went into the bathroom, closed the door, and turned on the water faucets full blast. I shoved every one of those crazy feelings right back down my throat to internalize them and got hold of myself." Julia put her hand over Viv's.
"Except I still felt as if I were going to explode. If he said one more sweet word, if he touched my hair, if he kissed my shoulderall hell was going to break loose with me and I wouldn't be able to control it . I had to get him out of there. I didn't want him to think I was some kind of. psychotic!
"He came to the bathroom door and said if I'd fallen in, he wanted to come swimming with me 'swimmin',' " he said. You've got to love that accent, don't you?" Viv smiled sadly. "I. Had. To. Get. Him. Out ."
She took a deep breath. "So I let the ax fall. In the coldest tone of voice I could dredge up, I complimented his performance and said I was done with him now."
"No-you-did-not." Julia's hand fidgeted over her mouth, her eyes wide with shock. "What did he do ?"
"Oh, God, Jules. There was the longest, most pregnant pause, and
then he said, ' Excuuuuuse me?' " Viv sank down on one of the wooden benches that lined Main Street, and Julia joined her.
"I know it sounds awful, and it was I was. But I can't begin to explain the urgency in me to get rid of him before it was too late and I was hooked. So I opened the bathroom door, no sign of emotion on my face, and said that he'd been magnificent but he had to go now.
"His jaw dropped so low that I thought he might trip on it. He looked at me with total disbelief. And then hatred. And then contempt.
"He said, 'Well, don't I even get a tip?' And he grabbed his clothes and yanked open the door. He gave me one last incredulous look. Then he said, 'It was nice fucking you, darlin'.' And he walked out."
To her surprise, she was shaking. She didn't even realize it until she saw Julia's hand vibrating on her shoulder.
"So." Julia took a deep breath. "So you didn't want to act like a psychotic, huh? Instead you acted like a psychotic. That was a good swap, there, Vivver."
"Yes, wasn't it?" She laughed weakly. "So now you understand that ugly little scene back there. I pretty much deserved it, even though I'm not the type to take an attack lying down. You know me. I'll fight, even when flight is the smartest thing to do."
"Viv, honey." Julia's brow furrowed, her perfectly groomed eyebrows drawing together. "I'm worried about you."
"Well, I'm worried about you . I don't think you know what you're signing up for."
"And I don't think you know what kind of void your life is becoming. You cannot just exist in a vacuum without other people!"
Viv got up. "I have plenty of other people in my life." There's Andie, and Mummy and Timmy and, ugh, Belker. There's old Schmidt. There are my pups: five distinct doggie personalities. There's Tabitha and crabby old Maurice .
She kept naming names to herself, to prove her point.
Julia nodded. "And do any of them make your life worth living? Would you feel desolate without one of those other people?"
"Feeling desolate is a waste of time," Viv said.
"You're right. Efficiency is everything," Julia told her. "We can't waste precious minutes being human. Being unproductive. I mean, gosh, those aren't bill-able hours."
"Hey, hey, hey. Easy, now. Let's move back to you, for a moment. You're making a major life change in less than two weeks. You're getting married. And regardless of any concerns I may have about that, it's your decision to make," Vivien reminded her.
"Why, thank you," Julia said with a grin.
"But. You are what Mummy would call 'a woman of means.' A chick with bucks. And speaking as not only your friend but your attorney, I recommend that you protect yourself."
Julia opened her mouth but Viv held up a finger.
"I'm talking about a very simple document called a prenuptial agreement"
"No!" Julia said furiously. "Damn it, that's what
Syd's been cooking up. What both of you are plotting. No, no, and if I didn't make myself clear, no ."
"Jules, it's for your protection and nothing else. It's not a curse, not an insult, and of course it doesn't mean that it will ever be necessary"
Eyes flashing, Julia snapped, "What it means is that I'd be entering into a marriage without a key ingredient, and that is trust . If you don't have trust, then you don't have love. You have nothing . I am not going to ruin my marriage before it starts, Vivien."
"I think you're overreacting. A prenup is not necessarily about mistrust; it's about planning for the future, okay? Just like when people buy burial plots. It doesn't mean they're going to keel over and croak the next day. They're just planning."
"No."
"You're planning a wedding, correct?"
"Yes."
"Because you have a vision. You want the event to unfold a certain way."
"Yeah"
"Doesn't that mean you don't trust someone else to do it for you, the way you'd want it?"
"Viv, you're twisting this. I am not a witness in a courtroom, okay? I'm not under cross-examination here. I am telling you point-blank that I refuse to sign a prenup. Don't push this any further. And let me warn you that it's not okay with me for you to go and talk to Roman about this. In fact, if you do, I won't be speaking to you any longer. I'm serious. Don't push this, Vivien. I understand that you have my best interests at heart, but it is my heart. I'm not going to wave some horrid piece of paper in Roman's face and demand that he sign on the bottom line. Do you understand?"
Viv looked at the stubborn dimple in Julia's chin and knew it was hopeless. She might be cute, she might be blond, but she knew her own mind. They walked in silence back to Orange Street.
* * *
Chapter Six
J.B. wished the waitress, cute as she was, would get the hell away from him and Roman. But she hovered and giggled and, very unsubtly, jiggled. He was an easy target. Fredericksburg was a small town, he was unmarried and he still had hair.
Finally in desperation he hunched a shoulder at her and said loudly to Roman, "I know you need to get back soon, so let's talk business."
She took the hint and their order to the kitchen while Rome stared at him like he had three heads. "Would you like to tell me what just happened in here and why you've transformed into a complete dickhead? And was it really necessary to do that to Vivien in public?"
"No, and yes." J.B. tipped a healthy amount of red wine down his throat and wished it were beer. The food at Cuvee was incredible, but he didn't share his friend's passion for the grape.
"What bit you in the ass?"
"She did. Three years ago. Right after we settled
Kiki's divorce. C'mon, Rome, you had to have caught that much."
"And?"
"I watched her in depositions and at court. She's amazing. I was fascinated. I made the mistake of thinking she might just carry that passion and wit and beauty into her personal life. That she might be warm and humannot just fake it. I wanted to get to know her, date her. Don't ask me why her, or bring up the distance thing. It wasn't a choice. It had nothing to do with practicality. I was just drawn to her for some reason."
Rome nodded his understanding.
"So I asked her to this black-tie thing I had to attend while I was in New York, working with Kiki's Manhattan attorneys. And before I know it, I'm getting lucky with her. Little did I realize that I was just a goddamn mechanical bull and she was a woman with a quarter."
His friend looked like he wanted to laugh, and J.B. didn't appreciate it. "What are you smirking at, you son of a bitch?"
Roman hid his mouth with his hand. "It's just that in high school, that would have been our ultimate fantasy. Life is cruel, isn't it?"
"I'm glad you think this is funny, Rome. But she was unbelievable. I was just a piece of meat to her. Get this: She told me my performance was impressive ! Can you beat that for sheer gall?"
"Hey, at least she didn't tell you that you sucked."
"No woman has ever said that. No woman ever will." J.B. cracked his knuckles.
"Well, damn, J.B. I'm flattered to be sitting with a gen-u-wine, certified Sex God." Roman laughed at his friend's extended middle finger. "So I take it she didn't send you flowers next day?"
His answer was a baleful stare.
"And your ego's a bit burned."
"This has nothing to do with my ego. I'm pissed about my lack of judgment. I swear I saw something in her, something rare. But obviously I was wrong." He fell silent, grateful that Rome didn't point out that he'd been wrong in his choice of wife, too.
"You wore a raincoat, right?"
"Of courseI'm not nuts."
"Then why are you still worried about it?"
J.B. clenched his jaw. "I'm not worried , Rome. I'm just starting to question my ability to gauge womenmy capacity as a judge of character. And seeing her again just brought back the anger."
Roman casually swirled the wine in his glass. "You wanted her, too, buddy."
J.B. shot him a glare. "Just because I performed the Heimlich on her doesn't mean I want
ed her."
"Sign of true love." Rome grinned. "Mouth-to-mouth is next, mark my words."
"I wouldn't touch that woman again if you paid me."
The answer he got was a raised brow.
"Or if I did," J.B. amended, "you can bet it would only be to teach her a lesson."
Vivien awoke that morning at 2:58 a.m., homesick for her dogs and thinking about a woman named Susan at the Displaced Homemakers' Association.
Susan had come in for a job training program after her husband left her with their three children to run off with another man. A wealthy stockbroker, he'd bypassed the typical midlife crisis for an entire mid-life meltdown.
Doug had, without Susan's knowledge, drained their life savings on a Miami-docked yacht, plastic surgery for his lover, and designer wardrobes and a trainer for them both.
He'd left Susan with a monster mortgage that she couldn't pay, three young girls, and a Mercedes that promptly got repossessed.
Viv was working her case pro bono, and had even, in a moment of madness, suggested to her mother that she might enjoy taking care of the girls a couple of days per week as a "fun little charity project." If Susan was going to get job training, she needed time away from her little ones, and her own parents couldn't do it every day.
Viv was disappointed, but not surprised, that so far Mummy's answer had been a resounding silence. Perhaps, however, she could use that to guilt her into funding a day-care center for the Displaced Home-makers' Association.
With this thought, Viv flipped on the bedside light, and wished immediately that she hadn't. The mustard and brown flowers converged on her, spinning her into a 1970s nightmare.
If Julia had succeeded in replacing all the Inn's mattresses, why hadn't she done something about the decor?
Oh, yesshe had Marv to reckon with, the man whose checkbook creaked when he opened it, at least when it came to business decisions. She'd never noticed either Sydney or Julia lacking for anything at school.
First Dance - [Bridesmaid's Chronicles 03] Page 6