“Even for me?” He bats his long dark eyelashes.
I hate it when he looks at me like that, it’s like he can manipulate me right through the facets in his eyes.
I cross my arms trying to hold steadfast, but the troops are retreating. He pushes the shiny black helmet towards me. He knows I’m crumbling. I try to scowl, but it feels more like a pathetic attempt to conceal a smile.
He waits patiently trying not to expel a triumphant expression. Now he has virtues?
“Oh, alright.” I swipe the helmet out of his hand. “I just had my hair blown out,” I whine, “I’m going to get helmet head.”
“You’ll be fine,” he assures me.” It’s a short ride to Sea Bright.”
I slip on the helmet, and everything turns black; I can hardly see a thing. I think he did that on purpose.
“No wheelies or other death defying tricks while I’m on the back of this thing, ok?”
“I promise,” he says, but there’s perjury in his voice. I wrap my arms around his waist and hold on for dear life. He releases the break, and we take off towards my parent’s house.
As if I didn’t have enough to worry about.
We pull into my parent’s pebbled driveway, Justice’s motorcycle announcing our arrival. I can already feel my father’s disapproval though the windows, he doesn’t like seeing his little girl pull up on a big bad bike.
I haven’t told my family much about Justice, the minimum really. How we met at a coffee shop (wink, wink) over the summer, and a very slow romance started during Christmas.
I left out the whole life in peril part, and that Justice is really an angel, and I am really an Empath. I feel those little details are best left between us.
All my family needs to know is that I am happy and emotionally healing, which is all that really matters.
We walk up the front stairs to the sliding glass doors. I place my hand on the handle as my stomach quivers like I have stage fright. Everyone can see us, but I just can’t bring myself to open the door. I’ve never brought anyone home besides Nikkee before, especially not someone from the opposite sex. It is nerve racking. It feels like it is Justice’s unveiling.
My mom slides the door open. A huge smile is painted across her face, “was it locked?” she asks ushering us into the house. I am having trouble speaking. Everyone is staring, waiting for introductions. Justice nudges me. I clear my throat and go around the room, “Jus, this is my mother Audrina, my father Phillip, my brother Jeremy, and his girlfriend Jenna. Everyone this is Justice.”
My mother wraps her arms around him and welcomes him into her home; the men shake hands and Jenna just stares like she is star-struck. I’m not surprised. The Seraphs have that effect.
“Dinner is all ready,” my mother announces. “I hope you’re hungry,” she says to Justice, and I freeze. Knowing what I do about his elusive eating habits this dinner should be an out of body experience.
My father eyes Justice’s motorcycle as we walk into the dining room. “Nice bike,” he glares.
Justice only smiles. “Thanks.”
My father weights no intimidation against him at all.
“How long have you been riding?” He asks with a parental tone.
“Since I was a kid,” Justice lies. “We have big gear heads in the family, real fast and furious kind of stuff; I’ve always been into motorcycles. I’m partial to two wheels,” he glances over at me. A lump forms in my throat.
“Oh Phillip, do you remember your motorcycle?” My mother says with a nostalgic tone, “it was so much fun; I miss those days.”
“Dad?” I ask curiously. “You never told us about that.”
He shoots a cold look at my mother; it’s clear he didn’t want her to bring up that part of his past. Justice smiles triumphantly in my direction. That seems to be his expression of the day.
“Well that was a long time ago,” my father says routed. “It’s a nice bike, but I prefer cruisers.”
“To each their own,” Justice relinquishes as he sits down at the table.
One land mine diverted.
I watch in horror as my mother piles Justice’s plate with food, there must be a small mountain of penne when she’s finished. If the table wasn’t glass, I would crawl underneath it and die of embarrassment. To my surprise, he contently starts eating, and a wave of relief washes over me.
It only lasts for a second though.
“So Justice,” my father asks from the head of the table. “What is it that you do?”
I nearly fall over. My eyes grow wide with panic as I look at him. We never did discuss a cover story; you know one to tell my parents when they ask him who he is exactly. My mouth dries up. I gulp some wine. Justice remains calm; his mannerisms suddenly remind me of Daniel. After a month of destroying priceless antiques and two of Jayden’s magic mirrors, dinner with my parents seemed to be nothing more than a blip on the radar, until now. I am finally getting my explosive power under control, but there is still the occasional slip.
“Family business.” Justice answers.
“Really?” My father is intrigued.
“Personal security.”
I nearly die of shock from the brilliance of his answer. My father’s face lights up. He is beyond pleased. “Well it’s nice to know my daughter is in good hands,” he smiles.
“Always.” Justice assures.
After my heart returns to normal speeds, dinner settles into casual conversation. I watch as Justice charms his way right into the good graces of my family, and by the end of the night he has everyone eating out of the palm of his hand. He can be so charismatic when he wants to be. I can’t help but watch in wonder. It’s just what I hoped for, a comfortable mesh.
When the painted twilight has come and gone it is time for the evening’s second stop. Remember when I said it feels like Justice’s unveiling? Well, I didn’t just mean to my family. Nikkee and Davis are next on the list.
Solstice is having its annual summer launch party, and Nikkee wanted to go. Memorial Day weekend is quickly approaching. And soon, the sleepy seaside towns along the East Coast will once again be crawling with tourists, looking for some age-old fun in the sun. And for the first time in my life, I’m not dreading summer.
After a quick change into something club couture we head off to meet everyone. Justice, like always, looks angelic in a light-blue button up and distressed jeans. I have on a sequined black mini with a white tank top. Thank God we can walk because there is no way I am straddling his bike in a skirt this short.
We walk into Solstice and immediately spot Nikkee and Davis; Honey and Serena happen to be there too. I can feel them all eagerly waiting for us. I nervously squeeze Justice’s hand as they watch our approach.
“What are you so nervous about?” He asks.
“I don’t know?” I confess. “This is all new to me.”
“It will be fine; I will compel them to like me if I have to,” he jokes.
“That’s not funny, because you can actually do it,” I say in a volume I know only he can hear.
Once again, introductions begin and once again six spellbound eyes transfix onto Justice. It is becoming quite amusing to me. And just like with my family, Justice turns on his cherub charm. The conversation becomes comfortable quickly, and I am put at ease. Introducing your boyfriend to friends and family is seriously stressful. Even with someone as perfect as Justice. He can make things so easy sometimes, and I am grateful for that. All around, I am grateful for him.
“I’m going to get a drink does anyone need anything?” He asks.
“I’ll take another Sparkling Cosmo,” Nikkee says.
“Liv?”
“I’ll have the same.” I smile. Tonight I don’t need a Blue Crush; the only crush I care about is the one walking away through the crowd.
Once Justice is out of sight, Nikkee grabs my arm, hard. “Holy hotness Batman, are you sure you only found him in a coffee shop and not 976- BABE? He should like, be on PEOPLE’s hot 100 lis
t,” her large green eyes twinkle.
“Nope, just a coffee shop.” I smirk.
She is completely unaware the place I am referring to is Prime, and that she was actually there. My little secret.
As the night goes on, people scatter. Nikkee and Davis are on the dance floor, Davis looking pained; he isn’t much of the clubbing type, but he tries for Nikkee. Honey and Serena are off with some other friends, while Justice and I hang out in the lounge above the dance floor, people watching. It is our new communal pastime.
We stand close together, letting the strobe lights dance around us while the disco ball glitters overhead. He entertains me by counting aloud how many cloned Situations he sees. This is New Jersey after all. He is laid-back, and I love it. I love him.
Yet, even with all the perfection of the night, I still feel like there is something missing. There is one thing I want from him, something I’m not sure he is ready to give.
The exposed skin by his collar has caught my attention all night, and like with Derrin before, I have an uncontrollable urge to touch him. But this time I’m fighting it wholeheartedly. I saw the ramifications of my forced invasion, and I don’t want to cross that same line with Justice. But there is just something I have to know.
“Liv? You have that look,” he pulls me out of my transfixion.
“What look?”
“That look. The same look you had right before Derrin tried to rip your throat out.”
I stare at him blankly.
“What do you want to know?” He asks.
I listen to the music trying to formulate a question. The beats pulsate in my ear.
“I want to know what you meant when you said forever and a day?”
“That’s it?” He asks skeptically.
“Partially.”
“What else? Let’s get it all out on the table.”
I bite my lip tentatively before I answer.
“I want to feel you.”
“You feel me every day,” he pulls my hand to his lips and kisses the inside of my palm.
“No, I want to feel you my way.” I say uneasily.
He stares down at me with mesmerizing eyes. They are so lustrous they even seem to glow in the darkness. He is contemplating my request.
He takes my hand that was just on his lips and carefully moves it towards his chest; I can’t explain the fear I have from just that small gesture. The anticipation of what I will find excites me and terrifies me all at once. The last time, the only time, I felt Justice; he literally lit me on fire.
As I apprehensively touch his skin, it washes over me. The tender warmth he holds inside, like I’m being wrapped in warm blankets on a cold autumn morning.
“Feel what you were looking for?” He asks.
“Yes.” I say as I spread my fingers over him. The sensation is glorious.
“Good.” He leans down and kisses me, his lips holding the same warmth as my insides. Without even thinking I wrap my arms around his neck and jerk him in closer.
He abruptly ceases our embrace. “Don’t you want to know the answer to your question?”
“Question?” I ask absently. I have forgotten all about the question.
He leans into my ear.
“I meant I would love you for forever and a day.”
I look back at him with sober eyes.
His answer makes me electrifyingly happy and miserably sad all at the same time.
He actually has forever.
“What’s wrong? You don’t like the answer?” He asks concerned.
“I love the answer; I know it’s the truth.”
I’ve never been happier than I am right now. Justice makes that so. I owe my life to him on so many levels, but I’m still not completely sold on our mortality vs. immortality issue and his ‘easy’ acceptance of the situation. I’m trying to work past it, if only for him.
I can’t help but wonder if a broken heart heals with death? One day I may know, but Justice, he’ll have to live with our fate for eternity.
Forever and a day. It sounds more like a prison sentence than anything else.
He wraps his arms around me pulling me away from my thoughts. “Whatever you’re thinking, can you please stop. Just be here with me. Don’t think about tomorrow or yesterday. There’s only today. Can you do that? For me?”
I would do anything for him.
“Are you sure you can’t read my mind?” I ask skeptically.
“Not your mind, only your face.”
I’ll remind myself to take more cues from him when it comes to hiding my emotions. Mental note: turn to stone.
He playfully kisses me on my neck, and I can’t help but laugh.
“That is the only expression I ever want to see,” he says.
It is the only expression I ever want to have. But I know that’s an impossible feat. Happiness is substantial, but not supreme.
I wrap my arms around him and lay my cheek against his chest. I breathe him in, letting his fresh linen scent scatter me. This is my favorite place in the world, bonded tightly in his arms. Justice is more than just a man to me; he is my salvation, my angel, my immortal.
I gaze up at his lovely face, completely lost in his transcendent stare. I touch my lips softly to his, imploring him. He’s hesitant at first, but ultimately gives in. He presses his mouth firmly against mine, and my spinal cord ignites. I want him more than wildly imaginable. As the heat rises between us, I abruptly push him away, wincing in pain. My jaw is on fire.
“Shit.” He hisses, and quickly dives down to suck my bottom lip in an attempt to ease the sting.
Oh man, this is starting to pose one serious friggin’ problem.
The End
For now…
About the Author
Marissa Carmel has been writing since a young age and although it has always been for personal enjoyment, she finally decided breakout and share her imagination with the world. She hopes that her universe is as fun and intriguing to her readers as it is to her.
Marissa Carmel is originally from NJ but moved to Maryland several years ago, she enjoys reading, writing, and catching up on her DVR library. She is currently working on the sequel to iFeel, Gravitational Pull, which she hopes to release sometime in 2012.
For more information on the author and upcoming projects visit Goodreads
@
http://www.goodreads.com/author/show/5211765.Marissa_Carmel
To hear inspirational music for iFeel visit iTunes iFeel/MCarmel
5
iFeel Page 24