Hannah had quietly eased her door open. Sitting at the top of the stairs, she listened to what her family said. A supercilious smile crept across her face. If you only knew! I’m not sorry for what I’ve done. I’m sorry it didn’t work. I won’t lie – therefore, I can’t confess or express repentance in front of everyone. Returning to her room, she knew she had decisions to make. I’ll stay here through the Christmas season. I won’t like eating at a separate table or not being able to communicate with any of my friends – if I still have any. After Christmas is over, I’ll get a ride from an Englisher and start thinking of life away from the Amish. I’m not one of them.
Chapter 6
On Christmas Eve, Annie and her mother had finally finished baking and preparing the foods for their own Christmas meal as well as the community meal. Annie looked at the boxes of cakes, pies and cookies she and her mother had just finished.
“Annie, it looks like the vegetables and meat for the stuffing are done. We’ll start cooking that tonight before going to bed. We’ll cook the turkey and ham tonight and warm them up before we go to the church meeting. Mashed potatoes can wait until tomorrow morning, but we will need to peel, cut and boil ten pounds of potatoes, just to make sure we have enough,” said Mrs. Fisher.
“Okay. If you have any gifts you need to finish making, let me know and I’ll be happy to finish up in here for you,” Annie offered.
“Everything’s finished. Besides, two sets of hands will finish all this work much more quickly. Do you know if Mark is planning to join us tonight or tomorrow?”
“Ya, he is. He’ll visit after dinner tonight and join us after the church service tomorrow morning. I invited him to join us for our dinner, if that’s okay,” Annie said.
“It’s fine. Do you have his gift ready?”
Annie grinned. “Ya. I think he’ll like it – I made him several neckerchiefs so he could protect his skin from the sun and keep the sweat from rolling down the back of his shirt.”
“Good! Show him how he can make them cooking scarves and I think he’ll be even happier with his gift,” Mrs. Fisher suggested.
“I’m planning on doing that,” Annie confirmed.
As dark fell, she and her mother looked at each other with exhaustion on their faces.
“Done, mamm! We can mash the potatoes tomorrow morning early and reheat the meats. Fortunately, meeting is taking place close by, so we can keep the meat hot while we’re in church. Should we decide how many baked goods we want to take with us?”
“Ya, that’s a good idea. I’ll get boxes from the storage room. We made enough that we can take at least two boxes and still have enough for our own family gathering.”
As Mrs. Fisher finished speaking, Mr. Fisher came in with a solemn look on his face.
“Abraham! What is it? Is something wrong?” asked Mrs. Fisher with concern.
“I just heard from the bishop – he and Deacon Bontrager just excommunicated Hannah Lapp today. Bishop told me that he gave Hannah an opportunity to express remorse to him and deacon, but she refused. My prayer is that the pain of excommunication and Shunning will lead her to think through her response to him and let him know she’s willing to repent in a meeting soon. I can only imagine the pain Mr. and Mrs. Lapp are experiencing now.”
“Not to mention Jacob Lapp. He has begun courting Jenny King, and I’ve gotten to know him better. He hasn’t been happy with Hannah’s actions and all he wanted was for her to see how they affect others. I’ll spend some time with Jenny tomorrow and see how Jacob is doing with this,” Annie said.
“We will speak with Mr. and Mrs. Lapp after church tomorrow and let them know they have our support. They won’t want to face excommunication, so they will make sure that, even at home, Hannah is Shunned – but I know how much they love her, and how much this must hurt,” said Mrs. Fisher.
“Ya. Annie was the most recent victim of Hannah’s self-centered actions. Annie, you’ll also need to let them know that you don’t blame them – and that you forgive Hannah,” said Mr. Fisher.
“I forgive her, yes, daed. But I can’t forget what she did to me. She very nearly made me lose my teaching position by spreading the news about the Kurtz children seeing Amanda Williams for therapy. Remember how my old school friends were ignoring me in October? I will talk to Mr. and Mrs. Lapp, as well as Jacob. But I don’t trust Hannah. She has always believed that she should get without working for whatever she wants. Even before we started school,” Annie said. As she finished speaking, someone knocked at the door.
“I’ll get that. You two sit down. You’ve been working hard today,” said Mr. Fisher, walking to the front door. Opening it, he smiled as he saw Mark Stoltzfus.
“Mark! Come in! How are you?”
“I am fine, denki. How about you?”
“We are all fine. Annie and her mamm spent all day long, cooking and baking for tomorrow. We’ve just been talking about the news of Hannah Lapp,” said Mr. Fisher.
“Ah, ya. My mamm and daed have also been talking about it. It is sad, I agree. But Hannah needs to understand that it is not part of the Amish way to cause harm to another, even in pursuit of what she wants. Do you think she’ll eventually repent?”
“We don’t know. I tend to believe that she will not – she’ll drift away from Peace Landing and her Amish faith and begin living as the Englishers do. I would be overjoyed to see her make a public confession, repent and promise not to hurt others. But . . .” Mr. Fisher’s shrug spoke volumes.
“Mark, would you like some hot cocoa?” asked Mrs. Fisher.
“Ya, it would warm me greatly. It is cold out there. It looks like we might get some more snow in the next day or two.”
After Mrs. Fisher and Annie made the cocoa and set a cookie-filled plate on the table, they sat down and began talking, relaxing after a long, work-filled day.
“Annie, I will be seeing you at church tomorrow. And I’ll be here for your family gathering as well,” Mark told Annie right before he left.
“I will see you tomorrow,” Annie said cheerfully. She and her mother washed the cups and put the cookies back in their bin, then went to bed.
***
The next morning, Annie ate a quick breakfast after dressing, washing her face and combing her hair neatly. With a fresh kapp on her head, she was neat and attractive. She put her coat on and helped her father load the back of the buggy with the foods she and her mother had made.
The Fishers arrived at their neighbor’s farm, where the church meeting was to be held. Annie helped her parents take the food into the house and, coming outside, sat with Jenny Fisher and Ruth Beiler. Looking around, she caught sight of the Lapp family, with Hannah sitting on a separate bench by herself.
Annie’s eyes paused on Hannah and she mused that the other young woman looked angry. She didn’t want Hannah to see her looking at her, so she turned, looked at her friends and shrugged slightly.
Jenny’s mouth was usually turned up in a happy smile. Today, however, she looked upset.
“Jenny, what is wrong?” Annie asked.
“I am hurting for Jacob. Hannah’s his twin sister and I know he’s hurting,” Jenny whispered.
“Hopefully, she will change her mind and repent,” Annie replied. She didn’t want to call attention to her own involvement in Hannah’s excommunication and Shunning, so she limited her remarks to that one statement.
During the three-hour service, which was conducted in High German, all families focused on the Scripture teaching, which was about the birth of Jesus Christ in the manger in Bethlehem. The ministers, deacon and bishop talked about how Jesus had been born to bring God’s message to His people, and encourage them to live a life of love for each other.
The families who were already aware of Hannah Lapp’s excommunication nodded to themselves, remembering their mission. Everyone in attendance sent up a fervent prayer that Hannah would truly repent so she could be welcomed back into the Peace Landing community with loving arms. Annie looked sideway
s at Hannah. She saw a young woman who had crossed her arms in defiant resistance of the day’s message.
Finally, the service ended. Several women moved into the kitchen of the house and began taking out platters of hot meats, along with bowls of mashed potatoes, vegetables and thick, savory gravies. Annie carried out two large bowls of salads in her arms, and set them down at one end of the large tables that were laden with a bountiful Christmas meal.
The oldest members of the community sat down to enjoy their meal while younger women continued to bring foods out. Children ran around, working off their energy as they waited for their turn to sit and eat.
Hannah, well-aware that she was forbidden from communicating with anyone in the congregation, stayed busy, arranging the bowls and platters of food on the buffet tables. Other members of the community walked around her, not talking to or interacting with her. Hannah was effectively enveloped in a small zone of silence.
Two ministers carried out a small table, upon which they placed a single place setting. Hannah knew this was her place to sit when it was her turn. She flushed, knowing that everyone else knew, too. Hannah sought her mother’s gaze and pled silently to be allowed to go home.
Mrs. Lapp silently shook her head – No, you will stay. We love you.
Hannah served herself when it was the turn of the young adults to serve themselves. She set her plate down hard on her isolated table, and made more noise than was necessary. Several heads swiveled in her direction, which caused her to flush deeply again. She ate quickly, wanting only to hide in a corner and nurse her hurt and growing anger.
At their table, Annie, Ruth and Jenny ate and talked quietly among themselves.
“Jenny, have you spoken with Jacob yet? What does he tell you?” Annie asked.
“He’s hopeful that Hannah will come around soon, that her Shunning will make her see that repentance is the only way back into the community,” Jenny said. She played with her food, not feeling very hungry.
“Jenny, you need to eat,” Ruth said.
“I’m just too worried about Jacob. I’ll eat more tonight if I’m hungry,” Jenny said in response.
“Jenny,” Annie said, placing her hand over Jenny’s hand. “It’s in God’s hands right now. He’s holding the Lapp family in His hands, protecting and soothing them. Mrs. Lapp doesn’t look happy, but she’s showing Hannah how much she loves her. This is a new experience for them – yes, but they will adjust and learn how to face it. We’re a strong people, we Amish. Okay?”
Jenny smiled gratefully. “Denki, Annie. Thank you for reminding me that God is watching over them, even Hannah.” She picked up her fork and began to eat.
Finally, it was the children’s turn to eat. Released from her solitary meal, Hannah shot up from her seat and walked to her parents.
“Mamm, daed, please let me go home! This is too . . . painful for me!” she whispered to them.
“Hannah, I’m sorry, but no. You are allowed to be around us and you can communicate with your mamm and me, but you can’t interact with anyone else. Come and sit with us. Become a part of this happy day, through us,” invited her father.
“Nee. I will walk home. I can’t stand being isolated and Shunned!” Hannah whispered fiercely.
“If this Shunning hurts, are you willing to reconsider your decision from yesterday? Are you willing to talk to the bishop and let him know you repent of your sins?” asked Mr. Lapp.
“Nee! Never!” Hannah forgot to whisper and her near-shout reverberated through the gathering.
Heads turned curiously and whispers began to move through the different groups like ocean waves.
The bishop, who had heard Hannah’s shout, approached the Lapps.
“Let her go. Abraham, take her home,” he advised.
“I will stay with her, then. I don’t trust her not to leave and take her anger out on anyone, particularly Miss Fisher,” said Mr. Lapp. “Hannah, come.”
He helped his daughter into the buggy and boarded himself. He flicked the reins and the horse started trotting home. The ride home was silent. As soon as the buggy stopped, Hannah jumped out and ran into the house. She slammed the door to her room hard – Mr. Lapp heard the sharp reverberation from the barn.
The community’s Christmas celebration continued. Annie found that, with Hannah gone, a dark cloud had lifted. She and her friends began talking and giggling about their holiday plans with their families.
“Mark is coming to dinner tonight. I’ll give him his gift then,” Annie said with a shining smile.
“What are you giving him?” Ruth asked.
“Shhh! He’s right over there,” Jenny pointed out. “I made something for Jacob, something he can use in the fields. I hope he’ll like it!” She blushed as she spoke.
Annie noticed the flush on Jenny’s cheeks.
“Ruth, I think she likes Jacob!”
The two young women teased Jenny for a few minutes, then Jenny turned the teasing to Ruth.
“Annie, I know who likes Ruth!”
“No! Who? Is it – Adam?”
“Adam Zook! I’ve seen him looking at her when he doesn’t think anyone’s looking!” giggled Jenny.
“Well, Ruth? Do you like him back?” asked Annie.
In answer, Ruth looked down and blushed deeply. She continued to be very shy.
When everyone had eaten their fill, the community’s Christmas gathering ended. Families gathered their dishes and tired children and headed home.
Annie sat behind her parents in their buggy. She was happy. Mark was coming that night and she had his gift ready to give to him. She mused on the only dark part of the day – Hannah’s refusal to consider repenting, even when she had gone through the pain of being Shunned. Lord, please show her the path to forgiving and loving herself. Bring her to the point where she is ready to repent.
At home, she rested after helping her mother put leftovers away. In her bedroom, she continued reluctantly thinking of Hannah and her situation. She realized she didn’t want to think of the other young woman, but was also aware that Hannah had brought her situation upon herself. Eventually, Annie drifted of to sleep, still feeling tired from her days of work, helping her mother to get ready for the Christmas celebrations.
***
Mrs. Lapp walked in through the front door, hearing only a tense silence as her husband helped her to bring in the platters and boxes of food.
“And, Hannah?” she asked.
“Upstairs, in her room. I’ve been checking on her every so often. She jumped out of the buggy and ran into her room. I heard her door slamming from the barn,” Mr. Lapp said. His grimace communicated his distaste for the display his daughter had put on.
“I will check on her now that I’m home,” Mrs. Lapp decided.
***
That night, Mark knocked at the Fisher’s front door. Mr. Fisher opened the door, letting Mark in. Mark placed his gift for Hannah near the fireplace and joined the family in the kitchen as they got ready to eat a light evening meal.
“Hello, Annie. I hope your day was a restful one,” Mark said.
“Ya. I napped after getting home. What did you do?” Annie asked.
“I finished making your gift and rested as well. I am looking forward to this meal.”
After dinner, Mark and the Fisher family moved into the living room, where they exchanged their gifts. Annie had made her father some serviceable handkerchiefs that he could use when his springtime allergies overwhelmed him. She had made more kapps for her mother, who, now that she stayed at home baking and crafting most days, needed more of the dark-blue head coverings. She nervously handed Mark his wrapped gift.
Mark opened his gift. Upon seeing the dark-colored neckerchiefs, he smiled gratefully.
“Annie, you must have had a little angel watching me in the fields! Some days, I break into such a sweat. These will be very handy for my work. Thank you!”
“You know, if you chill them and place them in your lunch bucket, you can wrap them a
round your neck so that you don’t get so hot. Just dip them in water and allow them to freeze, then, when you leave at the start of your day, put them in the box. They’ll be ready and waiting for you when you need them,” Annie said.
“Ya. Denki, Annie. Here is your gift. Mark handed Annie a large, plainly wrapped box.
She opened it, finding some delicate woodwork animals inside a large wooden box.
“Mark! These are all beautiful! Denki! I can store my books and workbooks in this box next to my desk – how did you know I needed this?” Annie asked. She smiled as she saw Mark’s brown eyes flick to her father. “These animals are beautiful! I will treasure them, always!” she said. She lifted them out and looked at them from all angles.
Hannah stayed stubbornly in her room over the next several days – she came down only for meals, sitting at her solitary table. She also helped silently with the cleaning and refused to join her family when they went to town. This required someone to stay at home with her to prevent her from leaving so she could wreak more havoc in someone else’s life.
***
Two days after Christmas, Mark stopped by to invite Annie to ride with him. He drove them to a field topped with an undisturbed coating of snow. He turned to Annie and took her hand.
“Annie, we have known each other all our lives. We began to court a year ago, getting to know each other better. As we did, I got to know a generous young woman who loves the Lord as much as I do. Even when you faced . . . difficulties, you stayed positive, refusing to think badly of others. I have fallen in love with you, Annie – I love you. I spoke to your parents several months ago, and asked them for their permission to ask you to marry me. They said yes. Annie Fisher, would you marry me? Would you become . . . Annie Stoltzfus?”
Annie gasped. She had somehow known that this day was coming. She had asked God for his guidance . . .
“Yes, Mark. I will marry you! I . . . love you, too.” Her smile was wide and beaming as she spoke.
Mark took both of her hands in his and smiled with love and relief. Back at the Fisher home, the couple announced their engagement to Annie’s parents.
Living Amish: Simple Pleasures (An Amish Love Story Series) Page 6