“Right.” I said. But once I said it, I had a bad feeling. I smiled the best smile I could, hoping this was the end of the Kamdyn conversation, and went back to my work. So did he.
Shortly after Kimber got home from work; Jayson left and went home for dinner. I was surprised he didn’t try to stay, but he said he was expected home. I thought I might hear from him again later, but to my surprise I didn’t. I finished my homework after dinner and decided to stay in my room and watch TV. Kimber and Justin invited me down to watch a movie they rented, but I was in the mood to be alone for a while. For once.
It didn’t take me long to fall asleep. I guess I was more tired than I thought. Or maybe it was that I had given myself a chance to settle and calm. Either way, as soon as I laid down to get comfortable and watch one of my favorite reality shows, my eyes drooped shut before the opening credits even finished rolling. For the second night in a row, I got lucky, and slept dreamlessly through the night.
The rest of the week passed just as quickly as the first day. I got into a routine of expecting to see Jayson everywhere. He made it a habit of meeting me after almost every class to walk me to the next. I told him over and over again it wasn’t necessary and I wasn’t in danger of getting lost anymore, but he insisted. I was expecting. Any day now, for his teachers to catch onto his ploy for leaving classes early. As the week went on, I did notice that people were watching us walk around together. It felt bizarre having people notice me let alone tracking me as I walked by and I couldn’t help but wonder what all the attention was about. At first I thought maybe I had something on my face or on my clothes. Being self conscious, I spent an abnormal amount of time examining my overall appearance during the day. When I asked Jayson about it, he said he didn’t notice anything. So I tried to ignore it. I had also gotten really good at avoiding Kamdyn. The hardest part of the day was Algebra class, where I knew he was just two seats away from me. I was always too scared to look in his direction, every time I did; he was either looking at me or I would catch the quick shift of his eyes looking away. To be honest, the attention totally freaked me out.
Finally, Friday came and the day was already almost over. Just Algebra left and I could have a break from feeling like a person living under a microscope.
Algebra was flying by. Thank god! As I went to hand in my homework from the night before, the final bell rang. I let out a sigh of relief and went to go back to my desk and pack up my things. I did a quick survey of the room, and noticed I was one of the last still lingering. Kamdyn seemed to already be gone. Good. I sat down and started packing my bag when someone came and sat in the empty seat next to me. My stomach clenched as I turned to look, and damn it all! It was Kamdyn.
“Hey, Trystie! Got any plans this weekend?”
“Um… Hi.” I said bringing my attention back to packing. “No, no plans. I’m still getting settled.”
“Well, if you decide you want to do something, I am having another party tonight. I thought you might like to come. If you’re up to it.” Did he just dare me? Then he stood up, winked at me, and walked out.
I threw the rest of my stuff in my bag and ran out after him, right into Jayson waiting outside the door.
“What did he want?” Jayson asked looking more curious that mad. At least there was no pain creeping in behind his eyes again.
“He invited me to his party… tonight.” I explained shrugging my shoulders.
“Oh,” he said. “What did you tell him?”
“I didn’t say anything, he didn’t wait for a reply. He just invited me to his party tonight and said only if I was up to it, then he got up and walked away.”
And there is was, right on cue, a glaze slid over his usually confident features. “You don’t want me to go, do you?”
He looked around the empty hallway, at everything except my face. “Well, I was going to ask you if you wanted to go with me, even if he didn’t invite you. I have to go, you know, because I missed the last one. So if you do want to go, you can come with me. I’ll keep you safe.”
Safe? Safe from what?
I didn’t say anything to him. I just nodded and started walking. Maybe I should go. Just because Kamdyn invited me, doesn’t mean I have to see him or even be near him. At a party full of god knows how many students from this school I’m sure I can avoid one person. Besides, I’ll have Jayson and his other friends to hang out with there. So I guess… why not.
“Alright,” I said when we were on out way home. “I’ll go with you… as long as you promise not to ditch me for some hot girl at the party. I still need a way to get home. I just need to run it by Justin and Kimber when they get in.”
I watched as Jayson bit his lower lip in a failed attempt to hide his grin, but he said nothing.
When we pulled in the driveway, Jayson hopped out to wait with me till someone got home. During our seemingly never ending afternoon, I got the majority of my homework done while Jayson paced around my room in anticipation. He just couldn’t stay still. I didn’t even bother asking him to sit or explain. Just a feeling, but I knew I would get nothing out of it but a bewildered expression and a shrug. Guys.
When Kimber got home I went down and cleared it with her about the party. We talked everything over. “I know you’re not a little girl, so I’m not going to treat you like one,” she explained. “It’s been my experience that the more freedom I allow you, with small but strict conditions, the better our relationship will be.” She gave me a look that clearly told me this was my one and only chance and I couldn’t mess up. They seemed to trust me, and that helped me trust them.
When I got back to my room, Jayson was lounged across my bed, watching TV. He jumped up as I walked in the room. “Can you go?” he asked with barely contained eagerness. He looked as if he would shake the answer out of me.
“Yes, I can go, but…”
“But…” he said impatiently.
“But there are two conditions. Well, I guess more like three, in this case.”
“Well… what are they?”
I smiled to myself as he started to twitch at his irration while I withheld valuable information. So, I ignored him and walked over to my closet.
He followed behind me. “Come on, Trystie. Stop playing.”
I faced him and flashed him a sweet and innocent smile. “What?”
He narrowed his eyes and… was that a growl?
“I have to go with you, I have to keep my phone on and with me and…”
“And!” he said nearly jumping up and down.
I laughed, he reminded me of a five year old I saw at Walmart once begging his mother for more than one new toy. I crossed my arms. “I thought you didn’t want me to go.”
“I never said that!” he yelled at me. “I told you I was going to ask you to come with me.” He wiped a hand down his face. “Well… what’s the last one?”
“Oh, so you were just mad because someone else invited me before you could?”
“Stop stalling!”
I couldn’t help but laugh again as I reached in the closet for something more party festive. “I have to be home by two.” I said without turning around. I felt the tense air in the room ease as I grabbed the last piece of clothing from a drawer and headed toward the bathroom. Just before I walked in, I turned around to Jayson. “Just so you know, I wouldn’t have gone without you.” I didn’t wait for him to respond; I just walked into the bathroom and shut the door behind me.
Chapter Four
We got to Kamdyn’s house early. From what I was told, Jayson had promised to come before everyone got there. He didn’t explain why and I didn’t ask. I assumed it was some weird guy thing and left it at that. But that didn’t stop me from trying to figure it out the whole ride there. Kamdyn’s house was huge and, like my new home, was set back into the woods at the end of a long drive way. Only Kamdyn’s sleek car was sitting in the open garage. No other cars were in sight.
Jayson didn’t knock before he walked in, he just opened the door l
ike he lived there. I followed him threw the entrance and down the hall to what looked like the living room. He turned and cast me a confused expression.
“Trystie, why don’t you wait here? I’ll go find Kamdyn.”
I gave him an unsure look, worrying on my bottom lip. I wasn’t fond of the idea, being left here, alone, in Kamdyn’s house. Alone. I didn’t even really know the person who lived here. What if he found me sitting in his living room? What would he do? Be mad? I wasn’t in any rush to find out.
“Don’t worry, I’ll be quick.” Jayson reassured me, reading the expression on my face more than accurately. He gave me a quick smile and squeezed my shoulder, then disappeared.
I couldn’t just sit down and wait for him to come back. I was too nervous and fidgety, mostly about running into Kamdyn himself. The party would be easy to get through, as long as Kamdyn kept a good distance. There was no reason to upset myself again and definitely no reason to upset Jayson. Now that I thought about it, I really hoped Jayson wasn’t getting the wrong idea about us. He is a friend. A good friend and although he is incredibly good looking and seems to care about me, more than I am used to, I just… can’t see him that way. What I need more than anything else is a friend, and that’s what he is. I don’t know if I would be ready for more than that.
Because I couldn’t sit, I walked around the big room. I glanced at all the family pictures on display, examined his insane entertainment system and TV. Who actually needed a TV that big? I shook my head and walked over to a wall of more pictures. I stopped at the most recent one of Kamdyn. Just looking at a picture of him sent a chill through my body. I would never have thought that a picture could capture all of his perfection. The colors of ravens feathers flowing through his hair, that confident yet not full-of-himself expression. But most of all, the camera had managed to replicate the pull you felt when looking to his eyes. Eyes the most amazing color of violet I had ever seen, giving you an intense feeling of… magic, surrounding you and swallowing you whole. One would think it was an experience to avoid like the plague but it was an experience you had to have and once you did, you could almost live for it. Scary. I had a hard time identifying the feeling before, since I never allowed myself to look at him long enough to figure it out. I actually tried to stay away from him, as it seemed, most of the time, he did the same with me. I shuttered again and dragged my eyes toward the large window.
“Are you cold?” a voice somewhere behind me asked. I jumped and involuntarily squeaked, startled, and swung around the face the intruder. And there he was, leaning against the entrance to the living room with an amused grin on his face.
No, just looking at you gives me the chills. “Yeah, I guess I am a little cold.” I said while rapping my arms around myself and hopefully hiding the pounding of my heart hammering in my chest.
He pulled himself off the wall and started toward me. I suddenly couldn’t move. I could only stand there and stare at the way his faultless body moved as he approached.
“I could let you borrow a shirt. If you get too cold.” He said once he stopped, inches in front of me. Why did he have to be so close? It was almost painful keeping my hands off him. What I would give to feel the connection between us when we touched. What is wrong with me? If I could have moved anything, I would have slapped myself across the face to wake up, but the only thing I could move was my eyes and I was concentrating on keeping them off his face.
Have some self control, Trystie!
“Um… no thanks. I’m sure I’ll be fine.” I answered in response to his offer hoping it was only in my mind that I waited forever to respond. I was surprised I could form the words. It took more effort that you would have thought.
“Well, the offer is always on the table. Just let me know.” He paused and pulled his attention from my face slowly taking a step back, the smile still perfectly sculpted on his face. “I’m glad you managed to pull yourself from your unpacking to make an appearance. I was hoping you’d come.”
I didn’t know how to respond to that, so I didn’t. And I didn’t trust myself to reply, so I changed the subject. “Did Jayson find you? He told me to wait while he went to go get you. He said he’d be right back.”
“No, he didn’t find me yet.” He took that small step forward again. “But it looks like you did.” Again, he was only inches from me, looking down at my face. I could smell his earthy scent, like a soft wind blowing threw a forest, and feel the heat radiating off him, reaching for me. Struggling, I refused to look up and meet his eyes. I felt his hand on my face. His fingers left a trail of tingles in their wake, gliding down the line of my jaw, stopping at my chin. I felt the pressure of his hand lifting my chin up, till my eyes were locked on his. The current spread from his fingers made my whole body tingle while his eyes enveloped mine, tugging at something deep within me. I saw a flash of color twinkle in his unusual eyes, but just as quickly as it appeared; it was gone, like it was never there at all. The smile on his face widened as he glared, unblinking.
“Kamdyn!” That was all it took, the loud echo made me jump and our gazes dropped. Kamdyn slowly let his hand slip from my face and turned around.
“Jayson,” he said, his voice calm, giving nothing away about what seemed to just happen. There was no way my voice, at this moment, could even fake calm. “Trystie was just telling me you were looking for me. I thought I would wait here until you got back.”
Jayson’s features pinched slightly. I watched as he took a deep breath and let it out, he literally shook himself and stepped into the room. He looked better now, if I didn’t know him, I wouldn’t know anything was wrong. But I did, so I knew better. There was nothing I could say that would make him feel better at this moment, with the three of us standing here together. It shouldn’t have been but it got… awkward. I would have to settle for a distraction before the tension in the air surrounding Jayson strangled me.
“Jayson,” I said as I stepped around Kamdyn and headed for the hallway in which Jayson was emerging. “Can I have your keys? I want to leave something in the truck.” Without even a glance in my direction, Jayson reached into his pocket and threw me the keys. “Thanks.” I said as I walked by and out of sight. Fresh air could never hurt.
I am not sure what happened while I was out in the truck, but when I got back in the house and returned to where I had left the boys, everything seemed to be back to normal. They were both lounged on the big black leather couch laughing at something I definitely missed. I walked into the room and took a seat on the end of the couch, furthest away from Kamdyn, but as far away from both as possible. I didn’t ask any questions or even interrupt their conversation. I simply threw Jayson’s keys in his direction and threw my head back hoping the night would go better then our first fifteen minutes here.
It wasn’t too long after that that people started to show up and I began to relax a little. The more people around me, the better.
Kamdyn eventually drifted off into the crowd of people swarming around his house and Jayson and I became surrounded by his group of friends from school. I began to notice after a while that as people came in to say hi to Jayson, they seemed to eye me from the side. I started getting a little uncomfortable and finally felt it was time to ask Jayson what was up.
“Come with me.” he said as he grabbed my hand and started dragging me from the loud music of the inside through the backdoor into the silence of the night now surrounding us.
We stopped outside on the back deck. He dropped my hand and turned to me. “Jayson, what’s going on? Why does everyone keep looking at me? They all know me now. I’m old news, not the “new girl” anymore. I got to school with them.” I couldn’t help but throw my hands up in the air in aggravation.
“Relax, Trystie! It’s not a big deal. They’re just not used to having someone… It doesn’t matter, just ignore them.”
“I can’t, I’ve been trying. It’s really unsettling to have every move you make watched.”
“Maybe there’s something in y
our teeth.” he said leaning over to nudge me. “Let me see.”
I snarled and shoved him away. “Jayson, not funny! And you will tell me later what is going on.” I didn’t give him the chance to say anything more. He would only keep telling me the same thing. I wanted answers and he wouldn’t give them to me now. But damn it, I would get them. Eventually. I turned around and stalked back into the party, back to the group of friends we left behind. Jayson followed closely behind me, close enough that I could hear him snickering, even with the music blaring around us.
After that, Jayson wouldn’t leave my side. He barely let me get up, always asking me if he could get me another drink. I didn’t complain, it was nice to be waited on. So I just stayed around the couch talking with Lauren about school and how well I was adjusting. She was really nice and seemed like someone I could get close to. After we exchanged numbers and made plans to go shopping, I decided it was time to make a break for it and run to the bathroom. I wasn’t sure how far I would make it before Jayson caught up to me. I didn’t want to have the ‘I can make it to the bathroom and back myself’ conversation with him, so I moved as quickly as I could through the mass of people, hopefully disappearing.
Walking away I realized how ironc this was. My whole life I felt invisible. No matter what I did, or I was with or who I dated, no one seemed to notice me. Here, after a life time of not really being seen, I couldn’t seem to hide.
I wandered around the house for a while, looking for a bathroom, lost in my own thoughts when I stumbled upon my destination, pulling me back from my run away thoughts.
It just figures, at a cliché high school party, there would be a long line of waiting girls outside the bathroom. What other choice did I have but to wait? So I got in line at the end behind a girl I recognized from my English class.
“Hey, you’re Trystie right?” the girl said almost falling on me in her attempt to turn around. “I’m Heather,” she stuck out her hand to shake mine, but it seemed more of a ploy for me to help keep her balanced. “You’re so lucky!” she continued. “I can’t believe you have only been here for a week and you’re already with one of the most gorgeous guys at school. He barely dates, you know. Not that he doesn’t have plenty of options.” Her eyebrows did a little dance and she stumbled again. I struggled to keep her on her feet.
Beautiful Nightmare Page 4