* * *
Julian waited a respectable twenty minutes before slipping out of the drawing room and making his way to the library. He opened the door and took in Patience Bunbury’s beauty. It felt like a bayonet to the chest. She was pretty, so pretty and sweet.
“Captain Swift,” she said, turning to face him, her cheeks bright pink.
“Miss Bunbury.” He inclined his head toward her.
“Would you … would you like to sit?” She gestured to the leather sofa.
Julian made his way over to the sofa and sat next to her. “Dinner was … interesting,” he began.
She pushed a blond curl behind her ear. Fetching, that. Quite.
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“Don’t tell me you didn’t notice the way Owen Monroe was staring at you all evening?”
Miss Bunbury’s eyes widened. “What? Owen? I mean, his lordship?”
“Yes. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you. I confess I considered calling him out.”
“Oh, no, no, no. You are mistaken. He didn’t—”
Julian slid closer. “I know what I saw. And I must admit, it made me jealous as hell.”
A little smile popped to her lips. “It did?”
“Yes, and you know what else?”
“What else?”
“I talked to Penelope again earlier. We ended our agreement. Apparently, she left before dinner.”
“Was she … upset?”
“You didn’t see her?”
Miss Bunbury didn’t look at him. “No,” she murmured.
“Once we got that nonsense out of the way about her pretending to be you, she wasn’t a bit upset. She told me she’d been planning to end things with me herself.” Julian laughed.
Miss Bunbury smiled again. “That’s surprising.” She seemed shy tonight, reticent. Why wouldn’t she look at him?
He slid closer to her on the sofa. Their thighs touched, only the fabric of their clothing separated them. “Miss Bunbury?”
“Y … es?”
“I no longer have an arrangement of any sort with Miss Monroe.”
“You do not?”
“No, I do not.”
“Did she … give you an explanation for why she’d pretended to be … me?” Her voice cracked on the last word.
“She did but it doesn’t matter. She obviously didn’t know I’d already met you. Though why she would think I hadn’t when I’ve been at a house party with you all week … I must admit I briefly believed she’d taken complete leave of her senses.”
Miss Bunbury closed her eyes and nodded.
“I would like very much to kiss you now,” Julian said.
A small gasp escaped her lips. “Me?”
“Patience,” he breathed. Julian stared at her beautiful face. He did want to kiss her. Cassandra wasn’t here, after all, and Cassandra was in love with another man. Patience was here and lovely and wanted him. He could tell by the way she looked at him, the way she touched him, the way she tipped back her head and closed her eyes, waiting for his kiss.
Julian lowered his mouth to hers. The feel of her sweet, soft lips under his made him gasp into her mouth. It was better than he’d expected. Much better.
He pulled her close, her bodice pressed against his chest. He pushed his tongue into her mouth, lust flooding through his veins, making his cock hard.
Patience kissed him back with a fervor and energy that enveloped him. She made little moaning noises in the back of her throat and she rocked against him.
His mouth slanted over hers, hot, hard, demanding. He couldn’t get enough, didn’t want to stop. She was gorgeous.
Only she wasn’t … Cassandra.
Reality slammed into his gut. He pulled his mouth away and pressed his forehead to hers, breathing heavily. No. No. Stop thinking about Cassie. This isn’t the time. She loves another man.
He clenched his jaw. What the hell was he doing, thinking about Cassie at a moment like this? He pulled Patience against him and kissed her again. Would Cass smell like this? Look like this? Be this irresistible?
He pulled his mouth away from Patience’s once more, holding her by the shoulders. Damn it to hell, he couldn’t get Cassie out of his mind. He shook his head as if that might serve to dislodge her. It didn’t.
Miss Bunbury stared up at him with wide blue eyes … eyes that looked very much like his memory of Cassandra’s eyes. He shook himself again. Now he was truly going mad, wanting Cassie so much that he was seeing her in a completely different woman. It wasn’t just wrong. It was sick, and completely unfair to Patience.
She blinked up at him, looking entirely confused. Damn it. That was his fault. He hated himself for what he was about to say.
“I’m sorry, Miss Bunbury…” And then, “Patience. I thought I could do this but I cannot.”
Tears filled her eyes. “I understand, Captain,” she murmured.
Julian felt like a complete arse. He was a complete arse. What sort of man kissed a nice young lady like Patience Bunbury and then stopped? She didn’t deserve this. She’d already been jilted by her intended last summer. Now she had to endure Julian’s ungentlemanly behavior, as well. He wouldn’t blame her if she hated him forever.
“God, Patience … Miss Bunbury. I’m a complete scoundrel. I truly didn’t intend to lead you on or to hurt you. Do you have a brother? A father? I’m certain one of them will want to call me out.”
Her voice was small. “Please, Captain Swift, no more apologies. You’ve nothing to apologize to me for. Please, just go.”
Julian bowed his head, then nodded.
He glanced up at her again and rubbed his thumb against her high cheekbone, wiping away one delicate tear. “Damn me to hell. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.”
And that was true, but it didn’t matter.
He stood and made his way to the door, then he turned back to Miss Bunbury. “I’m sorry.”
CHAPTER THIRTY
Cass took her time dressing the next morning. She sent back every gown her maid presented to her. The gowns didn’t matter, any one of them would have been fine. The truth was that she didn’t want to face Julian. And each thing she accomplished to get ready to go downstairs and see him would bring her that much closer to her moment of reckoning. A moment she dreaded.
It was time. Finally time to face the truth and take the consequences. She knew that. It was over.
First, however, she had to find Garrett. He’d had something to tell her last night. She’d been rude to him, rushing off like that. If she’d known what was going to happen, she wouldn’t have rushed. Would have lingered, actually. Oh, it had been a disaster. She’d tried to find Garrett after the debacle in the library but he was nowhere to be found and neither was Lucy. Instead, she’d gone up to bed and thought about how detestable she was. How much Julian was going to despise her once she told him the truth. Eventually, she’d fallen into an exhausted slumber, one that left her fitful and dreaming about Julian berating her for lying to him and marrying another woman. Her worst nightmare. It was all about to come true and there was nothing she could do to stop it. She could only delay the inevitable.
She stared at her pale reflection in the looking glass. Julian had told her she was the most beautiful woman in the world last night. Hadn’t that once been her dream? But he hadn’t said those words to her. No, Patience Bunbury was the most beautiful woman in the world, Patience Bunbury, the woman who didn’t exist. The reflection disgusted her. How could such a simple pretty face mask such ugliness and lies? She scrubbed her hands savagely across her face as if she could wipe away her looks, replace them with the mask of ugliness she knew she deserved after what she’d done. Julian was honorable and noble right up to the end. He’d been the one to stop, not her. Oh, no. She might have gone on kissing him all night, the lying little hoyden that she was.
She’d cried last night in front of him. That was poorly done also. But she hadn’t been crying for the reason he thought. He p
robably believed she was sad because Patience had developed a tendre for him. But the truth was she’d been crying because she knew he couldn’t kiss Patience because he still loved someone else, someone who was not Patience, and not Cass, someone whose eyes she wanted to scratch out.
Regardless, she must stop being a coward. She had to face Julian today. First, she’d find Garrett and see what was so urgent. Then, she’d find Julian. She would find him and finally tell him the truth. It was time. No matter what. No more hiding. No more lies.
Her maid returned with one more gown, a simple white one. “This one, miss?”
White, the symbol of purity, light, innocence, hardly a color she should wear today, sinner that she was. But if she was going to battle that devil who liked to pop up on her shoulder, she would need all the reinforcement she could get. “Yes, that one will be fine, Maria. I’m sorry I’ve been such a bother this morning.”
She stared back at her reflection in the looking glass once more. Patience? Cass? Whoever she was. It was finally time to face the truth.
* * *
Cass had just started down the stairway when a large commotion in the foyer caught her attention. There appeared to be a great many people there, all of them raising their voices.
She hurried down far enough to see the occupants of the space and caught her breath. She braced a hand against the bannister to steady herself. There, in the foyer with Lucy, Jane, Garrett, and a half-dozen servants, stood her parents. Owen wasn’t there. And neither was Julian, thank God. But … She leaned down to get a closer look.
Penelope was with them.
Cass’s heart thumped. Danger. That’s what this was. Danger, danger, danger. Every nerve in her body screamed at her to flee. Instead, she remained rooted to the spot, her shaking hand frozen to the bannister.
“I demand to see my daughter,” her mother, Lady Moreland, said.
“Yes, where is Cassandra? Bring her here this instant,” her father added.
Lucy kept glancing around nervously. “If you’d all just come into the drawing room, I’ll be happy to fetch Cass and we can all discuss this like civilized adults and—”
“Cassandra? Cassandra is here?”
Cass closed her eyes slowly and swallowed. She couldn’t see the person who’d just said those words but she knew him just the same.
Julian.
Julian strode forward then. Apparently he’d happened upon the scene in the foyer just as she had.
“Who are you?” Cass’s mother demanded of Julian.
“Why, Auntie, don’t you remember him? That is Captain Swift,” Penelope offered.
Cass’s mother’s eyes went wide. “Captain Swift?”
“Captain Swift?” her father echoed.
“At your service,” Julian said, bowing to them. “I haven’t seen either of you in quite a long time. I don’t blame you for not remembering me, Lord Moreland, Lady Moreland.”
Cass’s mother continued to eye him up and down before turning back to Lucy. “I want Cass here this instant,” she demanded.
Jane and Garrett were obviously attempting to assist Lucy in herding the little group into the nearby drawing room. Unfortunately, they were having as much luck as Lucy was. “I told you, Lady Moreland. I’ll be quite happy to go get Cass just as soon as you—”
Cass’s mother narrowed her eyes on Lucy and pointed her finger at her. “I don’t care if you are a duchess now, Your Grace.” She sneered the honorific. “I will not have you leading my daughter down the primrose path with you. All this time I’d been under the impression that the two of you were at a house party together until my niece here came to my home yesterday after her carriage broke down nearby and informed me that you were both here, only a few miles away.”
Julian’s head swiveled toward Lucy. “Your Grace?”
Jane and Garrett groaned.
Penelope looked as she did when they were children and she’d tried to solve a particularly difficult maths equation, a cross between pure confusion and a bit of nausea.
Cass’s parents both stared at Julian as if he’d lost his mind.
“Surely you recognize your hostess, the Duchess of Claringdon? Though I daresay she brings the title down a bit,” Lady Moreland said.
Lucy winced and turned her head sharply to the side as if she’d been slapped.
That was it. Cass marched down the stairs. She’d been a coward for far too long. She couldn’t allow Lucy to be treated with such disrespect by her parents, devil take the consequences.
“Mother!”
All pairs of eyes turned to look up at her.
“Mother?” Julian echoed the word, looking back and forth between Cass and her mother.
Cass marched down the stairs and made her way to the center of the group. “I will not allow you to speak to my friend so indecorously in her own home.” Cass put her hands on her hips and glared at her mother.
“It’s all right, Cass—” Lucy began, reaching out as if to soothe her.
Cass brushed her friend’s hand away. “No. It’s not all right. They’ve had weeks to get used to the fact that you married Derek and I didn’t, and it’s high time they began treating you with the respect due your title.”
She knew that with each word, she was revealing herself to Julian. And she was still being a coward because this way, this way might be like quickly ripping a bandage from a wound, but everything would be out. Everything would be obvious.
She couldn’t look at Julian but she could feel his gaze on her, watching her, piecing everything together.
“You demand that I treat this little baggage with respect?” her mother said in a voice that clearly indicated how shocked she was that Cass was standing up to her.
“Yes, and if the duke were here, he’d toss you out for being so impertinent to his bride.”
“Yes, I’m about to toss you out as well,” Garrett added.
Cass’s mother opened her mouth to speak again but Julian intervened. He turned to Lucy. “Wait a moment. Am I to understand from this bit of conversation that you are, in fact, Lucy Hunt, the Duchess of Claringdon? Derek’s wife?”
Jane and Garrett winced.
This time Penelope piped up. “Of course she is, Captain Swift. Who did you think she was? You’ve been staying at her house for the last week.”
Julian narrowed his eyes on Lucy, who had the grace to look apologetic. “I thought her name was Lady Worthing.” He continued to watch Lucy, but he addressed his remarks to the others.
“I sort of … invented that title,” Lucy offered, biting her lip. Oh, this was not good. Lucy never bit her lip.
Julian quickly snapped his head to the side to confront Cass. “And you? You’re not Patience Bunbury, are you?”
Penelope’s mouth dropped straight open. “What nonsense are you talking about? That’s my cousin Cass. She’s been writing to you for years. Don’t you remember her?”
Tears burned the backs of Cass’s eyes but she held them in. She didn’t have the right to cry. She didn’t have the right to do anything, anything other than stand here and let Julian realize the truth. And hate her for it.
He searched her face. His eyes scoured her body from head to toe. For an aching moment, she felt his pain, his shock, his … anger. “Cassandra?” he whispered brokenly. “You’re Cassandra?”
“Wait a moment, did she tell you she’s Patience?” Penelope demanded.
Julian didn’t take his eyes from Cass. “Yes.” The one word echoed across the foyer, bouncing off the marble columns and slapping Cass across the face.
“Who in heaven’s name is Patience Bunbury?” Cass’s mother demanded next.
Penelope plunked her hands on her hips. “She’s my very close friend who does not exist.”
A cacophony ensued then. All of the occupants of the foyer began shouting out questions and explanations and more questions. It escalated to a thunderous boil while Cass and Julian just stared at each other, silently. Cass’s chest ached. She couldn�
�t breathe and she desperately fought against the tears in her eyes. Julian watched her with a look that could only be described as … disgust.
And she couldn’t blame him.
CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE
Two hours later, Julian was standing on the terrace, his hands in his pockets, his shoulder propped against a large marble column, staring out into the gardens.
He sensed rather than saw Cass’s approach. Then, he watched her advance out of the corner of his eye. She walked toward him slowly, quietly, deliberately.
He finally turned to face her. She was so pretty, so heartbreakingly beautiful. Cassandra. Cassie. The woman he’d been wondering about, the woman he’d been dreaming about. She and the ethereal Patience Bunbury were one and the same? It had been all he could think about for the last two hours, but still, he could hardly credit it.
He narrowed his eyes on her face. He was a fool. How could he have not known? Not guessed? She had Cassie’s same flaxen hair. Cassie’s same cornflower-blue eyes. He even saw Cassie in the tug of her smile and the tiny dimple that appeared. How in the hell had he not noticed that? Very well. It was true that Cassandra looked little like she had seven years ago, but still, she was there, inside this swanlike beauty. She was there. His gut wrenched. She was there and she had been lying to him this entire time.
She stopped a few paces away from him. She pressed her lips together and swallowed. “I know I cannot offer any explanation that will make this right,” she began. “But I wanted to … face you. And say”—she hung her head—“I’m sorry.”
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