by Ana Stone
She had no answers. A maelstrom was still raging in her mind. She felt depleted. Mentally and emotionally. She just wanted to turn off the world for a while. Just turn it all off and escape into sleep.
That thought prompted her to get up and go into the bathroom. She still had a prescription for sleeping pills the doctor in Selma had prescribed to help her sleep in case she had trouble after the shooting.
She took two and swallowed them dry then went back to the bedroom, took off her clothes and crawled under the covers.
*****
Zeke was in a foul mood. The way things had ended with Roxy was not setting well at all. He was angry with her yet at the same time he couldn’t honestly say he blamed her. He wasn’t giving her much to hang onto so how could he expect her not to tell him to take a hike?
It wasn’t like he’d never been dumped by a woman. His life was living testament to his inability to sustain a relationship. Still, it stung. Maybe more because he was pretty sure she was going to end up with West.
Why that should be a thorn in his paw was a mystery. He and West had passed women back and forth over the years. Did it hurt because he really cared about Roxy or because he was jealous that she chose West over him?
Regardless of the reason he was not in a good mood when Reese stopped him on the way into the garage and said he had something he wanted Zeke to do.
Zeke supposed he should be relieved that the task was taking a video over to Art that Razr had obtained. Reese wanted Art and Zeke to show it to Morris to insure that Morris would not consider screwing over the MC in their deal. The video showed Morris’s daughter in the shower, sleeping, and other of her daily activities. Once he got a look at it he would know that his daughter was being watched and would not be safe unless he played square with the MC.
Art was alone in his office when Zeke rapped on the door frame.
“Zeke?” Art looked up at him. “What can I do for you?”
“Got a few minutes?”
“Sure, come on in.”
Zeke closed the door behind him, walked over and placed the disc on Art’s desk then took a seat on the chair in front of the desk.
“What’s this?” Art asked.
“The video Razr promised of Morris’s daughter.”
“Insurance.” Art remarked.
“In a manner of speaking. He wants Morris to watch it with us present. Can you make that happen?”
“Now?”
“Now would be best.”
Art shrugged and picked up the phone to dial. A few moments later he spoke into the receiver. “Dillon? Chief Phillips here. I need to see you.”
He listened for a few seconds before speaking again. “Now would be best. Zeke Justice and I are going to walk over.”
Art listened for another second then hung up the phone. “Okay, he’s going to send his secretary out in ten minutes.”
Zeke nodded and said nothing. Art studied him for a moment. “Zeke, you mind if I ask a question?”
Zeke shrugged. “Don’t know that I’ll have any answer, but ask away.”
“Why did you go back to the club? With your experience there has to be something out there in the world better than the Renegades. You don’t seem to like what Reese has done with the club. Hell, the way I remember it, that’s one of the reasons you enlisted.”
Zeke nodded. He didn’t fear being honest with Art. Art had been his father’s lifelong best friend and Zeke thought of him more as an Uncle that he did Reese. “It is. And I probably was a fool to come back. But this is home, Art. You know that. I was born here, grew up here. And…and I thought maybe I could change things, get the club back to where my grandfather and father once had it.
“Guess that was my real mistake – thinking I could change Reese. Or Carrie.”
“She called me, you know.” Art said.
“About what?”
“She wanted dirt on my new Deputy. Any ideas why?”
Zeke barked a harsh laugh. “Why else? She thinks something is going on between me and Roxy so she wants to find out if there’s anything she can get on Roxy that she can hold over my head to make me toe the line she and Reese want. What did you tell her?”
“The truth. Roxy’s a stand-up gal. Decorated military officer and from what I know a decent human being. Sexy as holy hell, but doesn’t seem to play that up as far as I can see. Stays to herself, does her job and aside from always seeming to be in the vicinity when you need help, doesn’t step out of line.”
Zeke nodded. “Is she seeing West?”
It was Art’s turn to shrug. “Don’t know. He spends a bit of time with her, but what she does on her time is her business. Say, it’s damn odd that it was West that the NCS sent here, huh?”
“Yes and no.”
“Well that’s clear as mud.”
“Yeah,” Zeke smiled. “I saw West before I came home. Caught up with him on the West Coast. We drove down across the border and spent a few days drinking and raising hell. One night I told him about what you’d told me about the club. Didn’t figure it would matter to him one way or the other. He was never in the drug area – he tended to focus more on overseas ops.
“I never thought what I said would lead him to Harmony. But maybe it did and if so then it’s on me that he’s here and on me to figure out a way to save my family and friends.”
“Maybe you should go talk to your Aunt Maybelle. She has connections.”
Zeke shook his head. “No way I’m dragging her into this mess.”
“She loves you, you know.”
“Yeah. I know. And I love her, but she’s as bad as Reese when it comes to being a control freak. Saddle your horse to her wagon and you lose control just as much as you do in the club. She thinks she knows how we ought to live and I can’t spend my life bowing to her either.”
“It was just a suggestion.”
“I know. No problem, Art. I just want to figure a way to make this right again. I’d like to think that one day I can have a normal life.”
“With a nice gal like Roxy?”
Zeke’s laugh was bitter, as bitter as the jealously that burned in his gut when he thought about Roxy and West being together. “Don’t think that’s in the cards.”
“Because of her or you?”
“Both.” Zeke said and stood. “Might as well head over to Morris’ office.”
“Yep.” Art stood and grabbed his keys from on top of the desk. “It’s not going to be pretty, I can tell you that.”
“This kind of business never is,” Zeke agreed. It definitely wasn’t pretty, and maybe not even honorable, but now that he had a plan, he had to stay the course. If lucky, he would find a way to make sure when the hammer fell, his family was out of the way.
*****
Roxy felt like she’d been run over by a truck. The pills had knocked her out for four hours. She woke feeling like she’d just crawled out of a black hole. Her head hurt and she felt groggy. She showered, drank three cups of coffee and decided she’d go work out, grab something to eat at the Wagon Wheel then come home and try to sleep before her shift.
She couldn’t stay home, pacing the floors, trying to make sense of the random memories and images that seemed to be flooding her mind like water from a burst dam.
When she reached town, she noticed the car was low on gas, so she stopped at the local convenience store to fill up. Just as she was finishing, Chief Phillips pulled up behind her. She watched as he got out of the patrol car and walked over to her.
“Roxy,” he greeted her.
“Chief.”
“You have a minute?”
“Yes, sir.”
He cut a look around then gestured to the side of the building. “Let’s take it over there.”
She nodded, got in her car and drove it to the side of the building. He pulled in behind her, got out and walked to the passenger door. Roxy didn’t say a word as he got in and closed the door.
He angled to face her. “I’m not going to beat ar
ound the bush, Roxy. What’s your involvement with Zeke Justice?”
“I think a better question is what are you doing in church with the MC? Are you in their pocket, sir?”
“I’m the Chief of Police, Deputy and I don’t think it’s appropriate for you—“
“To question where your loyalty lies?”
He was silent for a moment. “Where does your loyalty lie, Roxy? With Zeke or the department?”
Roxy blew out a breath, trying to dispel some of the frustration that was building. It was hard enough to deal with the barrage of thoughts battering her mind. Trying to deal with the Chief and his questions and allegiances was adding more than she could handle at the moment.
“Zeke’s my landlord. He was a Delta with my husband. With him when David was killed. He and his Aunt Stella have been kind to me. So…” she paused a beat. “What about you, sir? If you owe allegiance to the MC, does that mean the rest of the department owes them special consideration?”
He pulled the door handle and pushed the door open as he answered. “Not everything is what it seems, Roxy. It’s complicated and I’m not inclined to spell it out for you at the moment, but I can tell you that the MC has done a lot of good over the years for Harmony.”
“They don’t appear to be doing much good now, sir.”
He opened his mouth as if to respond, then apparently decided against it, shook his head and got out of the car. He closed the door then leaned down to look through the opened window at her. “Be careful, Roxy.”
“Yes, sir. I always am.”
He nodded, straightened and walked away. Roxy leaned down to prop her forehead against the steering wheel. Now that was just plain strange. Why did he want to know about her and Zeke? And why should it matter if she was involved with Zeke since he was obviously aligned with the MC?
Just another thing that made no sense in Harmony.
She straightened, started her car and pulled out of the parking lot. Two minutes later she pulled into the parking lot of the Wagon Wheel. She got out of the car and as she did, West pulled up beside her. He got out of his car and walked to hers to open the door for her.
“When I was a kid they had the best ice cream cones there. Wonder if they still are?
“I don’t know.” She replied.
“Then let’s find out.”
She had no energy to argue. “You want to sit outside or go inside?”
“Let’s go inside.”
She shrugged and followed him inside. He stopped inside the door and looked around. “It’s like stepping back in time. Nothing’s changed.”
She nodded and smiled at the waitress, Brittany, who approached. “Hey, Brit,” she greeted the younger woman.
“I got a booth opening up in a few minutes,” Brittany said with a smile. “Or one of the picnic tables outside.”
“Outside?” Roxy directed the question to West.
“Sure, why not.”
They walked back outside, where a long row of picnic tables sat on concrete beneath a tin roof supported by old wood columns.
West took a seat at a table and patted the bench beside him. Roxy took a seat.
“Ya’ll need menus?” Brittany asked.
“Do you still have ice cream cones?” West asked.
“Why yes we do. Vanilla, strawberry, chocolate or a combo of any.”
“I’ll take a cone of vanilla and a soda, Coke would be good.”
“Roxy?” Brittany looked at her.
“Just an iced tea for now, thanks. And a club sandwich to go.”
The waitress hurried away and West looked around for a moment before turning his attention to her.
“You feeling better?”
“Not really.”
“Can I help?”
She angled slightly toward him. “What’s happening to me, West?”
“You want to be more specific?”
She sighed and looked away. “I wish I could. Ever since … ever since—“
“I made you come.”
“Yeah,” she cut a look at him. “And I blacked out.”
“Some orgasm,” he said with a smile, then looked up as the waitress approached with their order.
“Thank you.” He accepted the cone of ice cream she held in her right hand.
Once free of the cone, she plucked the drinks from the tray balanced on her left hand and placed them, with straws on the table. “Anything else ya’ll need just yell.”
“Thanks, Brit,” Roxy replied.
“Oh my,” West gave an appreciative moan after sampling the ice cream. “Just like I remembered. Here, you have to try this.”
“No, thanks, I’m good,” She refused.
“Oh, come on, just one taste.” He leaned closer, putting the cone close to her lips.
She moved her face closer at the same moment he moved the cone closer and ended up with ice cream covering her lips and chin. West laughed as she licked at her lips and grabbed for the old fashioned napkin holder on the table.
“Sorry. Oops, missed a spot.” He reached over to run his index finger along her lower lip
He stuck his finger in his mouth, his eyes on hers. It was completely inappropriate, definitely unprofessional and so replete with invitation that despite her best intention, something warm unfurled in her belly.
The smile he gave her told her that he was all too aware of the energy arcing between them and was thoroughly enjoying it. Warring emotions hammered her all at once. She was honest enough with herself to admit that she was attracted to West. He had the kind of looks, and even the cocky, over-confident attitude that drew her. Just enough of a bad boy persona to make him a little dangerous and yet walking the right side of the law. It was no secret to either of them that she wanted him.
But what about that perplexing sense of anxiety he provoked, some odd combination of anticipation and fear that woke something hungry inside her? Was that desire or a warning to step away? She didn’t know. All she knew for sure was that the attraction was potent to say the least.
“So,” he broke the moment. “Back to our conversation.”
“What was that?”
His smile was knowing, maybe a bit too knowing. “The--incident.”
Roxy wasn’t much into playing games. He was CIA. No telling how much background he had on her before or since she came to Harmony. “If you know something then tell me.”
“You first. Tell me what’s going on, Roxy. What has you so freaked out?”
“I’m … I don’t know how to explain it. All these images and—memories, I guess—they’re hammering at my brain and… and nothing really makes sense.” She lowered her head, shook it then looked up at him.
“Like remembering you – and Zeke. It felt like we were, I don’t know – a team. And I remember you – being with you. Having feelings for you. But I also remember Zeke and feeling for him.
“I remember being places—missions, I guess. High risk, danger. Exciting. You’re there—in some. Others he’s there.”
She paused and looked out at the street for a minute. “I don’t feel like me, anymore. I mean, I do, but … but I feel like –like who I thought I was when I came here isn’t really all of who I am. Does that make sense?”
“Total.”
“It does?”
He leaned in close. “We were concerned that you wouldn’t remember.”
“Remember what?”
“Who you really are.”
Something hot and suffocating descended on her, bringing a wave of nausea that threatened to make her heave. “What do you mean?”
West smiled. “Honey, I want to tell you. Believe me, more than anything I want to. But you need to remember on your own or it won’t be real.”
“What the hell does that mean? If you know then tell me!”
“I can’t, Roxy. It’s vital that you remember and you will, I promise, but you have to give it time. All I can tell you is that Zeke was once part of your life. You did love him. But he betrayed you. Not
once but many times so you ended it.
“That’s when we got together. At first it was just team-mates, friends. But in time—never mind, I’ve said too much already. Just trust me, okay. Your memory will come back and when it does then you’ll know the truth.”
Roxy shook her head and stood. “I have to go.”
“Where?” he stood to face her.
“I don’t know. The gym. I need to work out.”
“So, I’ll see you later?”
“I don’t know, West. Maybe. Just… just give me some space. I need to try and make sense of all this. Okay?”
“If that’s what you need.” He took her hand. “But if you need me…?”
“I know. Thanks.” She disengaged her hand from his and turned away. She got in her car, gave him a wave and pulled out, completely forgetting the food order she’d placed.
It took only five minutes to get to the gym. She went in, changed and decided she’d take a long run before starting on her weight workout. It was a nice day, a little hot, but there was a slight breeze so it was tolerable.
Thanks to the turmoil in her mind and her unsuccessful attempt to make sense of it, she lost track of time and ended up running much longer than normal. Nearly two hours later she slowed to a walk about a block from the gym.
That’s when she saw him. Zeke. Sitting on his bike. Great. The last thing she wanted was another fight with Zeke, and that’s surely what it would be. Neither of them were going to change their mind. They stood on opposite sides and there was no middle ground where they seemed to be able to meet.
“I thought I might find you here,” he said as she approached.
“What do you want?”
He reached out to grab her hand and pull her close to where he sat straddling his bike. She did not resist. She was too emotionally worn-out for much of anything. She’d just let him say his piece and get it over with.
“Roxy, I know you don’t think you can trust me, but god as my witness, West is nothing but trouble. You need to stay away from him.”
She didn’t see the point in arguing so she nodded and withdrew her hand from his. “Thanks for the warning.” With that, she turned to walk away. But he caught her by the wrist and pulled her back.