“Okay,” she answered shyly.
I grinned reassuringly. “Great.”
Her lips tugged up in a small smile. “See you later, then,” she added before walking away.
Somewhat confused at her sudden approach, I stared after her, wishing we could be friends again; we used to have so much in common.
I was glad that even though we weren’t as close as we were two years ago, we were trying to be on better terms. My smile turned into a disgusted grimace as I turned to Farah and saw her and Chris pretty much eating each other’s faces. Shaking my head and scrunching my nose, I decided not to wait for her.
As usual, I walked to my locker to grab my things, but something was going on because people were staring at me. Some whispered as I passed, making me feel self-conscious. As I approached my locker, my steps faltered.
Someone had scribbled ‘slut’ on my locker door. I had a feeling Marissa was responsible.
Ignoring every stare and whisper, I opened it and took out my books as if nothing had happened. It was childish of her to think I would be affected by this. After getting my things, I walked to the office to report it to the principal.
The school supposedly had strict regulations about bullying, but they didn’t really enforce them since Marissa pretty much did whatever she felt like and the guys had their fight club. Even though that was officially off school grounds, everyone still knew about it.
Brooding, I made my way to the office. I didn’t care about finding the person who did this; I just wanted the graffiti cleaned up.
Luckily, Mr. White was right there. I took a deep breath before I greeted him and told him about what had happened, though I kept my suspicions to myself. I didn’t have real evidence Marissa was behind it.
“We’ll deal with the bullies, Ms. Taylor.” His usually stern eyes held genuine concern. “Do you want us to call your father?”
I shook my head. “No thank you. I’ll just get to class.”
“If you learn who’s behind it, don’t hesitate to tell us.”
“Okay.”
I walked out of the office and Marissa was right across the hall, sneering at me while clasping her books tightly in her arms. In a way, I felt bad for her. She had to do things like this to feel better about herself. Nonetheless, it bothered me to see all eyes on me as I walked down the hallway. Then again, I couldn’t let her know she was getting to me, so I smiled as I passed her.
Her own smile faltered for a fraction of a second, but she composed herself. Frowning, she turned away and took out her cell phone as if to check her messages.
I reached my classroom to find Farah, Chris, and Nate waiting for me at the room’s door.
“Are you all right?” my blonde friend asked me as she hurried to me, her blue eyes glowering.
“Yeah.”
“Seriously? Because that bitch is going too far, and I’d like to give her a piece of my mind,” she murmured viciously, narrowing her eyes.
I grabbed her arm. “I’m fine. Thank you, Farah, but that’s exactly what she wants,” I whispered as we walked to her boyfriend. Farah stared at me for a moment and nodded stiffly.
Nate’s gray eyes examined me for a moment before he nodded at me. “All right?”
I shook my head. “I’m just pissed, that’s all.”
He smiled, nodding. A moment later he asked, “Do you guys want to skip school?”
I rolled my eyes at the same time Farah answered excitedly, “That’s a great idea! I’ve never skipped school in my life!”
Nate smiled mischievously as I glared at him. “I don’t think that’s a great idea, Farah.” I glanced sternly at my friend. I thought about her parents and how they might blame Chris for this.
“Are you serious?” Chris blinked at her, completely ignoring me. “We have to,” he stated seriously as he looked at me.
Sighing, I shook my head. “No. I don’t want to get anyone into trouble.”
“Come on, Taylor, don’t be such a party pooper!” Nate raised one eyebrow, making my heart flutter like crazy.
Trying to ignore that, I murmured shyly, “My father is picking me up later.” Not to mention that Farah’s parents are probably going to flip.
“Call him.” Nate shrugged. “Just tell him about Marissa’s stunt and say you need a break from school.”
“What about you?” I turned to Farah, who was beaming at me, completely hyper about the whole idea. “What about your parents?”
“Oh, I’m going to tell them about it!”
Chris shook his head. “Tsk. That kind of blows the whole skipping thing.”
“Well, I don’t want to get grounded for this! I’m blaming you.” She smiled at me. “It’s the perfect excuse for everyone!”
I rubbed a palm across my face, completely discouraged. “Guys, you might get in trouble.”
Nathan snorted. “We skip all the time.” Farah started to giggle like crazy. “It’s fine.”
“You’re a bad influence.” I stared pointedly at the boys. They were both smirking. I rolled my eyes as Farah shrieked excitedly.
“How do we do it?” she whispered while looking at both sides of the hallway. Since there were still a couple of minutes left before the bell, a few students were still milling around.
“We just walk out,” Nate stated unfazed as he grabbed my hand and led me outside. My lips parted as my hand tingled where he touched me. Swallowing hard, I turned to look at Farah, who was following us closely, with a panicked expression on my face. She was smiling knowingly at me.
Nate led us to his truck, and Chris and Farah sat in the back while Nate opened the door for me.
“Where are we going, anyway?” I asked them as he hopped in.
“Who cares?” He shrugged as the car’s engine roared to life. “You might want to text your father soon, Cassie.”
“Why?”
“Because Mr. White is looking at us,” he answered unfazed as my eyes widened and I turned to look at the school grounds. And yes, Mr. White was right there in the parking lot watching us ride away. Shit.
“Maybe you should feign crying or something,” Farah suggested from behind me. But we’d already left the parking lot, so it would have been pointless. So I took out my phone and texted Dad while Coldplay blasted on the stereo. I stopped typing and turned to Nate.
“What?” he asked without looking at me, a lopsided smile on his face. It made my heart skip a beat.
“I didn’t know you like Coldplay. It’s one of my favorite bands.”
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Taylor.”
I scrunched my nose. He was right. I really didn’t know anything about him. “And you seem to know everything about me,” I said, disheartened.
Nate turned to look at me for a second, smiling broadly. I shook my head with a small smile on my face and finished typing my text to Dad’s. He answered me a minute later, asking me how I was feeling and stuff like that. I reassured him I was okay but that I needed some time off.
Farah and Chris were too silent in the back. I had a good idea what they were doing, so I didn’t even try to make conversation with them.
“Guys,” Nate groaned, “my car is not a room!”
I burst out laughing as Chris kicked Nate’s seat. “I can kick you out, dude!” Nate added as he took the highway.
“Where are we going?”
“Curiosity killed the cat.”
“Come on, Nate!” I elongated the e, making me sound whinny. He chuckled. And ignored me. I rolled my eyes and stared outside, enjoying the view.
Minutes later, he parked in front of Fenway Park. “Seriously?” I raised an eyebrow.
He lifted his shoulders in a noncommittal way. “I like baseball.” He looked at the entrance and turned to me, quite excited. I hadn’t seen this side of him before, and I liked it. I smiled back as we stepped out of the car and approached the main entrance.
He greeted the old guard warmly, as if they were old friends. The man shook han
ds with him and let us through, and since it was a weekday, the park was pretty much empty.
My lips parted as we walked through the aisles. There was so much history here. As we reached the field, I looked around, imagining the place packed with people shouting and having fun while the players nervously concentrated on the game.
“This is awesome,” I murmured breathlessly.
“It is, right?” Nate smiled at me. The lopsided smile.
“I didn’t picture you as a Red Sox fan.” He shrugged and admired the view as I stared at him. My mouth felt dry, and I willed myself to look somewhere else.
I could hear Farah and Chris’s laughter through the entire field. He was tickling her, and she was trying to get away from him. I smiled at them; they were such a cute couple. Most importantly, they seemed really happy with each other.
“They’re disgustingly cheesy, aren’t they?” Nate asked beside me, shaking his head.
Chuckling, I shoved him playfully. “You wish you could be corny as them!”
Nate’s gray eyes bored into me. My heart raced as my stomach churned. “Maybe.” His almost shy smile made my heart skip a beat. Or two.
I swallowed hard as I gazed at him. His eyes were so dark, and my lips parted as he leaned closer to me. But Chris tackled him then, and they both fell to the ground and started to wrestle playfully.
Farah was bent over, breathing hard from running all over the field. “Sorry to interrupt,” she said a minute later with a smirk. I passed a hand across my face, embarrassed and kind of annoyed at the same time.
She chuckled and shoved me playfully. “Besides, if you end up kissing or something, it’s best if you two are alone.”
“We’re were not kissing,” I murmured self-conscious as my cheeks flushed.
Farah rolled her eyes at the same time Chris and Nate walked to us, all sweaty and dirty from rolling around in the grass. They were both still shoving each other playfully and laughing.
The guard borrowed a bat and ball for us, and we fooled around trying to play ball for a while. After a few hours, we were all thirsty and hungry from running around the field.
“I wish they sold hot dogs every day here,” Nate said as we left the park.
I chuckled as Chris commented that Nathan was always thinking about food.
We hopped in the car, and Nate drove us to what he called the best restaurant in town. It was a small place that specialized in sandwiches, and since it was almost noon, it was packed. We waited in line and ordered what Nate recommended, which was a feat in itself, since he was drooling at every item on the menu.
With our sandwiches and iced tea, we walked to the park nearby and sat on the grass to eat. He’d been right. The food was out of this world. The bread was definitely home-baked, and the mayo was homemade too.
While we ate, Farah asked Chris about Tom’s party. Her boyfriend looked at her like she’d grown a second head. “We’ve never been to one,” he answered warily.
“Well, there’s always a first, right?” She turned to me. “We’re all going on this weekend.”
Nate snorted. “With that ass?”
I tilted my head. “Tom’s not an ass.”
Chris shook his head. “Uh-oh.”
Nate narrowed his eyes at me. “He is.”
Ignoring Chris, I shook my head. “He’s okay.”
Nate crumpled up the paper bag his meal had come in. “I can’t believe you’re standing up for him.” His gray eyes stared at me for a moment before he gazed into the distance. “He’s an asshole.”
“You don’t know him, Nate.”
He huffed and turned to me, scowling. “And you do?” I blinked at him. I opened my mouth to say something when he stood up. “I don’t want to hear it.” He stomped over to a trash can and chucked his trash into it. I looked quizzically at Chris, who only shook his head.
The drive back home was pretty silent as we listened to the radio. Nate was clearly mad at me and pretty much ignored me all the way, clasping the steering wheel tightly. Granted, I didn’t try to make conversation, but he didn’t even look at me.
He dropped off Chris and Farah first. The ride became even more tense after that since we were now alone. Despite being angry at me, he walked me to the front door. Hesitantly, I took out my keys. I glanced at him. “Nathan, I’m really sorry. I didn’t know.”
“What?” He looked at me with hurt in his gray eyes. “That I hate him?”
I bit my lip. “Hate is a strong word.”
“I do. I hate him.” He ran a hand through his hair. “But you obviously don’t know anything about it. You’ve been living in your fucking little bubble ignoring everyone else.”
My heart sank and I was left speechless as his words cut through me. I really didn’t know what to say to that. It was true. I had ignored everyone around me, but Tom had always been sort of nice to me in spite of that. I distinctly remembered the time I got drunk and pretty much threw myself at him. He didn’t take advantage of that, so I had to give him some credit.
Nate pressed his lips together tightly and shook his head. Breathing out, he turned around and walked away while my eyes brimmed with tears and my stomach plummeted to the ground.
Why is he so mad at me?
Chapter Fourteen
Raindrops rolled down my cheek. My breath came in pants as I pushed myself harder. My legs were cramping and my feet were tired, but I needed it. I wanted to feel the natural high I always felt after jogging. Pushing myself harder always made me feel better. And I wanted to feel better. I was tired of being angry or sad. Or both.
Sleep hadn’t been easy last night. Nathan’s words were etched in my mind. I knew he’d spoken out of anger, but his words hurt because they were true, and we both knew it.
When I felt like my legs couldn’t go any farther, I slowed and walked home. The light rain tapping against my skin felt refreshing after all the exercise. Dad was still asleep as I closed the front door and stepped inside the kitchen. I made him coffee before climbing upstairs to take a shower.
After getting dressed in a pair of light denim jeans, a coral tank top, and a see-through beige sweater, I walked to the kitchen for breakfast. Dad was already up and sipping his coffee while reading the news on his tablet.
“Hey, kiddo, how are you?” His blue eyes watched me in concern. He’d been worried after I told him about Marissa’s little outburst at school.
“I’m fine.” Ignoring his worried look, I took out a bowl and filled it with cereal and milk. I wasn’t really hungry, but I needed to eat something, for Dad’s sake, at least.
“Did you sleep at all?” His hands encased his coffee mug as he gazed at me. I shook my head. There was no point in denying the dark circles under my eyes. “I’m going to talk to White about this.” His eyes clouded for a moment. “Do you want to stay home today?”
I sat down on the table. “No.” Playing with my spoon while looking at my bowl, I murmured, “I don’t care about Marissa.”
“That girl will have to suffer some serious consequences after that stunt.”
“Dad.” He glanced at me. “I really don’t care about her.”
Dad’s brows furrowed as he cupped his chin. “What’s going on, then?”
I kept my mouth shut tightly as I left the spoon hanging on the edge of the bowl. “It’s—” I cringed for a moment, “—it’s about Nathan.”
His eyes narrowed as his stance tensed. “What about him?”
“He’s mad at me.” I frowned. I don’t even know why.
“Was he disrespectful to you?”
I gestured for him to stop by raising a palm. “No. He’s angry because he has this thing against Tom and I kind of stood up for him.”
Dad’s lips tugged up in a small smile. His shoulders relaxed and he woke up his tablet to keep reading. “Could he be more obvious?”
Frowning, I stared at him. “What do you mean?”
His smirk widened. “He’s jealous.”
Sighing, I sh
ook my head. “He’s not.” Why would anyone want to be with someone as fucked up as me?
His blue eyes assessed me for a moment, and a sadness passed through them as if he was reading my thoughts. “Are you seeing Amanda tonight?”
“Yeah.” I frowned at my mushy cereal and forced myself to eat it as fast as I could.
“You can stay home if you like, you know?” Dad added as I got up took the dirty bowl in the sink.
I shook my head as I washed it. “I’m fine.” And I kind of want to see Nathan and talk to him. What if he didn’t want to talk to me, though? Sadly, he’d been right. I had lived in a stupid little bubble for a long time, not caring about anyone else.
Forcing a small smile, I looked at my father. He was still looking at me with that sad expression. “I’m okay, Dad.” I kissed him on the cheek. He nodded, not quite convinced, and I walked upstairs to brush my teeth and dab some gloss on my lips.
The walk to school was excruciatingly slow.
Why is it that when you want time to pass, it actually seems to slow down?
As I approached the building, I remembered Anne. Shit. I had completely forgotten about her. She probably wouldn’t want to talk after I stood her up yesterday.
Since it was too early, school was pretty much deserted. I walked to my locker. The paint over the graffiti looked dull. I touched it before taking a deep breath, opening the door, and taking out my books. A few classmates started to appear in the hallways. But I didn’t actually talk to anyone, so I leaned on my homeroom’s door waiting for the teacher to open it. Finally, after waiting for almost fifteen minutes, Mr. Fischer, our homeroom and history teacher, unlocked the door and I was able to get inside the classroom.
Wondering if Anne still had the same phone number, I sent her a text as I waited for other students to arrive. I didn’t have her number on my phone, but I didn’t need it. I’d known it by heart because she’d had the same cell number since junior high. A moment later, my phone buzzed.
Anne: Heard about M. She sucks. It’s ok. We can hang out today. Meet up at the same place?
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