by Aaron Denius
“You've been seen with the girl, and you've been spotted returning late multiple nights.” He won't look me in the eye. “You'll have to deal with the consequences. Do yourself a favor. Don't talk too much. Keep the answers short.”
I don't answer. I follow in his long shadow through the tunnels to what looks like the darkest part of this whole city. The smell of wet dirt accosts my nose. Nothing good is down here.
Farouk walks through an open door, and I step in behind him. The room is about five times the size of my bedroom. A small unkempt bed graces the wall next to the bathroom on my right. On the opposite wall are six monitors stacked atop each other. They are more worn than any of the monitors in Egypt. Grainy feeds of the field and the exterior of the stadium play on all but one.
The last monitor shows something entirely different. It's a large clean room. In the center are two of the medical beds like I recovered in back at the compound. The glass covers are closed, and they look like the two newest pieces of equipment in this entire stadium. That must be the bunker for the Genesys.
“Sit.” Lucie snaps me from my trance. Farouk is already sitting in a chair in the middle of the room. Lucie sits on the other side of a table from him. The table is littered with tablets and some of those old books Atom used to read.
I take a seat in the chair next to Farouk, heeding his advice. I plan to speak as little as possible. I keep my posture in the chair as rigid as possible, still trying my best to pass off being a drone.
Her eyes study every inch of my body, inside and out. “Where were you?”
I take a moment to process my answer. “Exploring.”
My brief answer seems to catch her off guard; the way she crosses her arms tells me she's frustrated with what I said. She looks at Farouk for help, but he stays quiet. She looks back at me. “Exploring what?”
“The city.” I'm intent on keeping every reply as brief as possible.
“Why?” she snaps back.
“To learn about the outsiders.” I keep myself as calm as possible.
She leans forward, intrigued. “Why do you want to learn about them?
“They are not like the outsiders near the compound in Egypt. I am curious why.” I'm almost as surprised by my answer as she is.
Lucie looks to Farouk, and this time he nods. She faces me again and smiles. “Who is the girl?”
My breathing stops. She knows about KJ. This isn't good. She could do something to her and her family. I shape the words I say next with extreme caution. “I have questioned many girls. They are different than me, and I like to learn what else makes them different other than appearances.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I see Farouk smirk, and I know that I answered that well. I want to apologize to KJ for saying there are other girls, even though I know I meant nothing wrong by what I said.
“And what makes them different?” Lucie presses, attempting to catch me in a lie.
I have gotten into a good rhythm by now, so I am ready to answer whatever she asks me. “They smile more often than the males and take appreciation in the smallest details. They care more about the well-being of others. They are smart, and strong, and they seem better suited to lead, like yourself.”
My last comment seems to surprise Lucie. She stammers, and her cheeks turn red. The compliment catches Farouk off guard as well.
“Get him out of here!” she yells out before she expresses any embarrassment. She still wants to maintain the upper hand. “And don't let him leave the compound again.”
Farouk leads me out and waits a few moments before he speaks. “Your development is remarkable. I would have never in a million years thought that you would develop the ability to lie, compliment, and manipulate.
“Thank you.” My smile almost reaches my ears. It is the nicest thing he has said to me.
“Don't let it go to your head. You are not off the hook. You messed up and will have to face the consequences.” Farouk states. He's careful not to speak when we are in earshot of anyone else.
“Okay. What do I need to do?” I whisper.
He waits to answer until we have made it back to my room, and he shuts the door. “You will need to lay low for the next week. Don't leave this room. She's going to be watching you and will have someone follow your every move. She'll get tired in a week, but until then, we can't compromise your progress. Paz has filled me in on everything you've told her. Do you still have any full vials?”
“Yes, two.” I grab them from under my bed. I hope Paz hasn't told him everything we've talked about. I don't want him to know that I've been second-guessing my leadership.
Farouk grabs the vials from my hands and places them in his pocket. “Do you trust 13 to be able to continue your work?”
“Absolutely. He has been there with me every time I've turned a drone.” I let 13 do it the last time, but I'm not sure if it would be a good idea to tell Farouk.
“Good.” He opens the door. “Don't let me catch you outside.”
He shuts the door behind him, and I fall back onto my bed. Thoughts are littering my head. Can 13 keep turning the drones? We have built a decent-sized community in Badwater, and 13 kept other drones away from there to ensure that no one would catch on to what we were doing. He's now going to have to work twice as hard.
Lucie didn't mention anything about Badwater, which means that I wasn't followed during the day. Maybe she had someone on guard near the entrance to the stadium. They would know what times I returned from the city and meeting with KJ. But they might not know who KJ is.
I hope KJ figures out and understands why I'm not there. We’ve made it a habit to meet every other day. Sometimes we'll skip an extra one to throw off anyone that may have been following us. That’s all over now.
With every new passing day, my anxiety builds. I need to tell KJ that I was ordered to stay at the compound. I don't want her to be mad at me or to think that I didn't love her back. On the third day, Paz stopped by to bring some protein pouches and follow up on our previous session. I took the opportunity to ask her about love. I know that I was giving away my relationship with KJ in asking her, but I wanted to understand love more.
After telling me that I was putting KJ at risk, she reassured me that she would not share this conversation. Paz explained how love was an uncontrollable feeling where you focus more on the other person's well-being than your own. You want them near you always and can't imagine a future without them. Love is an energy that pulls two people together so hard that it physically hurts when they are apart. This, she told me, was how she felt about Farouk. It's how I feel about KJ.
That was two days ago. Two days of anxiety and need. Two days of pain in my chest with a want to break all the rules. Two nights of restless sleep and aching tears. As blissful as love can seem, when you can't share it with the person you want, it is the most agonizing thing in the world.
I don't know how much longer I can confine myself to my room, so I resort to the only thing that's made time move a little quicker: sleep. With the amount of rest I've been getting, my energy supply has overflowed, and I'm ready to run for hours. The only blessing I can take away from this isolation, I have returned to my physical and mental peak.
The bed embraces me when I lay back, and I engulf myself in the sheets. My mind works hard to keep me awake, but after a few minutes, the darkness wins.
My dream starts the same as it has been for most nights over the last few weeks. I'm standing on a pulpit in the middle of the stadium's field, and I'm surrounded by hundreds of drones listening to the venom I spit. I don't recognize myself. There is a darkness to me. A darkness in my heart. It's us against the world.
The drones around me cheer and yell with a rabid fanaticism. At this point, I'd be carried away on the shoulders of the drones, but tonight a faint voice in the raucous crowd catches my attention. A few hundred feet away, KJ is pushing her way through the crowd to get to me. I can't make out what she is trying to say, but her look of concern and urgency call
s to me.
I step down from the pulpit and force my way through the crowd to her. Every few steps I take, a drone pulls me back, away from her. We inch closer but at a slower pace than I'd want. I hear the rumble first before the ground shakes with violent anger. Every last one of us in that field falls to the ground.
The sky flashes bright red, and I turn my attention to the stadium that surrounds us. In a wave of fire and ash, the walls around us burn up. I run to KJ, pushing my way through the drones that stand from their fallen position. Behind her, the wave of fire scorches every drone it touches.
“80!” she screams as she runs to me. The wave gains on her with each step she takes.
I run as fast as I can, faster than I ever have before. As we are about to reach each other, the wave engulfs her. I reach my hand out to her extended arm, but when I grab it, it turns to ash. The wave pushes past me, leaving a charred field in its wake. I am the only one left on this black and red canvas. The stadium is gone. The drones are gone. KJ is gone.
My mind lingers on this vision of me standing alone for a few more moments before I wake up drenched in my sweat. I have learned through conversations with Paz that my dreams are visual representations of my fears. That does not take away the emotional toll they have on me.
I need to know KJ is safe. I have to see her. I don't care that it hasn't been a week yet. I will go to her today. I need to figure out how to do it without getting caught.
My best chance is going to be right after the drones bring me my food. I know that Farouk has scheduled them to do so every day to make sure that I'm still in my room. If I can somehow switch places with one of them, I could sneak out, but the patch on my eye makes me a dead giveaway. What could I say to them to convince them to lead me out of here?
I sprawl on my bed and run through different ideas, each one worse than the last. I'm on the brink of my best idea when there is a knock on my door. It's too late—I know it's the drones, and I will have to improvise.
When I open the door, the two drones force themselves in and close the door behind them. I jump back onto my bed, ready to fight them off if I have to. They always hand me the food and leave, so to barge into my room tells me they have other intentions.
“What do you want?” I demand. My eyes dart between the pair, keeping myself ready for whichever one decides to attack first.
The one on the right holds his hands up to calm me down. “We are Integers. 13 sent us.”
“Where is 13?” I inquire. I need to make sure they are telling the truth.
“Badwater.” The other drone says. “He wanted us to check on you since he hasn't heard from you or about you for days.”
“So, you guys have turned?” I climb down from my perch on the bed and look at them both in the eye. There is a softness behind them, like jumping into water instead of onto the ground.
“Yes. We were one of the first you guys turned.” The one to my left responds as they both show me the burn marks on their necks from the prods. It's still tough to tell everyone apart, but with time, their personalities will develop.
“I'm sorry that I do not remember each of you.” I don't know what else to say.
“It's okay.” The one on the right smiles. “We find it harder to tell each other apart now, as well.”
“It's like in learning how different we are, we realize how alike we are,” the other one adds.
“Exactly!” says the first. “Anyway, is there anything you would like us to tell 13?
I am so caught up with this exchange that I almost forget my original intention. “I need you guys to get me out of here. I have to get into the city.”
“Okay,” they say in unison.
I'm surprised by the quick response, but then I remember that they see me as their superior. They aren't going to question my orders. “Take me out of here like a prisoner. Lead me out of the stadium through the area with the least amount of activity. I can't be seen by anyone who would be suspicious of my being out of my room.”
“We can take him through the armory,” the one on the right says to the one on the left.
“There shouldn't be anyone there,” the second one agrees. “Come with us.”
The drones open my door and look both ways into the hallway before they lead me out. Each one holds one of my arms in theirs. They take me in the opposite direction than I am used to going down my hallway. It all feels backward to me because, for some reason, I thought there was nothing this way. I had walked down before and found myself facing a long dark corridor. I never went further than that.
Today, however, we dive deep into the darkness. After a few dozen feet, my eyes begin to adjust to the darkness around me. I can make out the faint outlines of cracks in the concrete on the walls.
“Where are we?” I whisper.
“Under the field,” one of them responds. I'm still not sure which.
It makes sense that we are under the field. It's the only place I can imagine where a corridor would exist that is this long. I never imagined that there was much on the other side of the stadium from where I was staying.
After a few more steps, I begin to make out a small birth of light at the end of this tunnel. A perfect interpretation of what it was like to turn from a drone to my current woke form—stepping out of the darkness and into the light.
When we arrive on the other side, the drones lead me through a few more hallways before pushing me through a set of double doors. We pass a couple of scientists along the way, but they all seem content with their thoughts and pay me no mind.
“There is a small door next to the big one at the other end of this armory. That should spit you out at the back of the stadium,” one drone says as the other keeps watch at the double doors.
“Okay. Tell whoever you need to that I'm still in my room, and tell 13 to keep doing what he's been doing.” I turn to see a massive space before me. It rivals the size of the field in the stadium.
A type of weapon or vehicle occupies almost every inch of this space. There are about a dozen Flyz and twice as many roll pods. They look ready for a war, if one ever comes. Long ago, people must have used this area to house other transports for whatever occurred here in the past.
The jog to the end of the armory takes me about a minute. I look up at the big door, which must be at least fifty feet wide and thirty feet high. Whatever needed to fit through there must have been enormous. I hustle to the end of the big door and find myself face to face with a normal sized door. I look back, but the drones are gone.
Pushing the door open, the low light of dusk greets my face. I inch myself along the stadium's outside wall, looking for the right moment to break off and sprint to the city. Luck is on my side as the clouds are low tonight. The cold blanket engulfs the drones on watch at the top of the stadium. With their vision obscured, I'm pretty sure they can't see me. Still, I proceed with caution.
I spot a large heap of rubble ahead of me and know that this would be an excellent place to run to because of the cover it would give me. I look up to make sure the clouds are still shielding me, and with a push off the wall, I run to the heap of concrete and steel.
After checking to make sure that I wasn't followed, I push a little deeper into the city before I catch my bearings. This is a part of the city that I have not yet been to. It's desolate, but I remind myself of the first time I found myself in a barren area of the town. I was overrun by the Cabras and was saved by KJ.
I'm cursing the cloud cover now because it diminishes my visibility and appears to be dropping lower. Soon I won't be able to see more than a few feet in front of me. I look back toward the stadium to assess which direction might get me to KJ faster. Once I piece together my location, I take off at a light jog. I want to keep a steady pace so that I don't tire out and can make a quick decision if I need to.
This part of the city is in complete ruins. Few buildings are recognizable as most have been reduced to piles of debris. If anything lived here, it would have a hard time survi
ving. Still, I don't take my chances and keep my pace until I see more intact buildings appear before me. When I see a few outsiders moving about, I know I've reached the part of the city with which I am familiar.
I slow my pace to make sense of the area I am in so I can find my way to where KJ and I had been meeting. I'm grateful that we've explored the city together—it's allowed me to create a mental map of every road.
As I continue toward my destination, I notice that the number of outsiders congregating out in the open is larger than usual. KJ told me that most didn't care I was running around the city with her, but the looks that some have been giving me are making me uneasy. I have never felt such anger and hate directed toward me.
I press forward for another mile before I turn a corner and see her sitting in front of the entrance that had become our meeting place. Her face is tired and worn, but she looks as beautiful as ever. The low clouds are framing her in such a way that she looks ethereal.
She stands when she sees me but doesn't budge. I walk over to her, too scared to touch her. “Hi, KJ.”
Her eyes struggle with the soup of emotions she is feeling, and a light glaze covers them. She slaps me hard on my cheek, catching me off guard. My heart sinks, unsure of how to respond, but before I can react, she jumps into my arms and kisses my lips.
“What happened?” She pulls away from me.
“They found out I had been going into the city and locked me up,” I tell her.
“Do they know about me?” The fear in her voice cuts through me. I would never want to put her in danger. I would never let anything bad happen to her.
“No. Farouk does, but he wouldn't do anything,” I say, trying to calm her.
She pushes me back. “Why didn't you tell me? I've been coming here every night and waiting for hours.”
“I really couldn't. They locked me in my room, and I couldn't even get a message to 13 to be able to tell you. They are monitoring my every move. I'm not even supposed to be here right now, but I had to see you.” I grab her hand.