by Sariah Skye
I didn’t know where I was or why I was there, all I could recall was that it was so insanely black as far as I could tell…miles and miles and miles of just pure black, soul-numbing darkness.
"Hello?" I called into the nothingness, not really expecting to hear anything, but maybe the sound of my own voice echoing back at me. Except there was no echo. It was as if my voice just disappeared. "Hello?" I asked again, with even more uncertainty. I spun around on my heels, looking for something—anything—to give me some kind of idea of where the Hell I was. Maybe it was in fact Hell. I couldn’t imagine anything scarier than pure, ample darkness and nothingness. No matter where I turned, where I looked, I saw nothing. Heard nothing. Felt nothing but absolute emptiness.
I tried to recall something—anything at all. Something to make me feel real, feel whole, feel something but I couldn’t think of a damn thing. All I felt was empty. Hollow.
"Is anyone there?" I called into the void again. "Anything? Where am I?"
No one or nothing replied but I could swear I heard the faintest low growl in the distance.
"Hello?" Now I was starting to feel something: fear. Absolute terror that encapsulated every nerve, every pore of my body. I started to scream, even though there wasn’t technically anything to scream at.
The growl sounded again, a bit lower, a bit fiercer and a bit louder.
I whimpered to myself, wrapping my arms around my body to try to control the shiver that was shaking throughout my body. "Where am I…" I trailed off, asking no one in particular, just wanting to hear the sound of my own voice to remind myself that I was in fact, real and here. Wherever here was, I had no idea.
I heard the growl again. And again getting closer, closer, closer.
My heart was pounding in my chest, harder and faster the closer it got.
The growl was so loud now it was almost deafening. I pressed my palms over my ears to somehow drown it out but nothing I did helped; it kept getting louder and louder, the vibrations of each growl reverberating through my body like I was a metal object being struck with a tuning fork.
Finally, it was here. The growl. I could see nothing but blackness on top of blackness but I knew it was here. The terror I felt was greater than any fear I had experienced ever in my life; it took my breath away. I was screaming, gasping at the sensation, of the sheer nothingness.
It said something. I don’t know how it did because whatever it was, it was not corporeal. It wasn’t real but yet, it was. I couldn’t reach out and touch it, but whatever it was, it was there.
"Death..." Growled the menacing voice.
All of a sudden, I felt something grasp around my throat. It was cold and hard and everything about it just felt wrong. Very wrong. It felt poisonous and destructive and unforgiving.
It started squeezing my throat. Instinctively my hands went to whatever it was to try to pry them away; to stop them from choking me but I could grasp nothing because there was nothing actually there.
I just stood there, motionless for a moment due to shock before falling to my feet helplessly choking and gasping for breath. Tighter and tighter the grasp felt, and the area in front of me started going gray, then white then blinding light.
Somehow, before the blinding light I managed to squeak out a raspy whisper of "Help!" before the final squeeze around my throat, my chest. All the air was choked out of me. My eyes grew heavy as I felt the life leave my body. Just as I was about to give in, I saw a blinding light scald my vision. And then…
Nothing.
"Leo!"
My eyes flew open and I inhaled as if I was just taking my first breath of air after being underwater for too long.
"Oh my god, Leo!"
I couldn’t see anything, but I could recognize the voice. It was deep, soothing and incredibly panicked.
I blinked rapidly, trying to wash the darkness away. My body felt listless as I tried to move my limbs to no avail.
The voice wrapped something around me and seemed to pull my body closer to a firm surface. It was warm and familiar and soothing. I let the feeling wash over me, as if being outside on a sunny day after a year of ice and snow, the warm brightness tingled my senses starting in my fingertips and emanating through my arms and eventually my shoulders.
I heard a steady thump. Thump. Thump.
When the warmth touched my core—my heart or my center or whatever, I couldn’t help let out a contented sigh.
"Oh my god, Leo! Are you okay?"
I blinked a few more times. A face started coming into view: brown eyes, black hair, porcelain skin with a shadowed jaw. I gasped, realizing who it was.
"Gabriel!" I cried, clumsily wrapping my arms around him but not quite grasping correctly, as they just fell back to my side again. "Gabriel, what—where—"
"I’m here, I’m here," he just said, trying to sound calm but the panic in his tone betrayed him. He pulled me tighter against him, sniffling. "Oh my God what the Hell happened? What was that?"
"Wha…" my mouth tried to form words, but nothing intelligible was coming out.
I felt another surge of warmth radiate through my body, it was enough to melt the frost out of my fingers and arms and I was able to grasp my arms around him. I pulled myself tight, close—closer than I had ever been to another being ever in my life. "Gabriel! Wha—"
"What happened? I don’t know, Leo. I heard you scream and when I came in here, there was this…thing surrounding you."
"Thing?" I questioned.
"I don’t know what it was, I cannot explain it. But it felt evil and wrong and— "
"—dark?" I suggested to him.
He nodded. "Yes, dark. It was like little dark hands were around your throat and there was this emptiness around you. Like these evil, dark little tendrils were surrounding you. Almost like…a shadow?" he said the word to himself unconvinced. "I don’t know what it was but I do know it was trying to kill you."
"Kill me?" I squeaked.
"Yes. I barely got here in time. If you hadn’t managed to scream, I don’t know if I would have been here until it was too late. I managed to summon some moonlight from outside and shoot it at you and that seemed to chase whatever it was away; it disappeared instantly."
I whimpered, feeling tears swell in my eyes. Although I was with Gabriel now, the terror I felt—or couldn’t feel—in that void was getting to me. The reality of what happened—whatever it was—was sinking in. I started to shake violently.
"Whoa, whoa there…calm down," he said, trying to sound soothing but again, panic was betraying him. He pried my arms off of him and gently set me back down on the bed as I was crying, sobbing uncontrollably.
"I don’t know what it was!" I said, reaching my hand out for him, as if touching him was the anchor to reality away from the emptiness I felt. "It was horrible! It was dark and— "
He shushed me, putting a gentle fingertip to my lips. "Leo, it’s okay now. I can tell how drained you are, again. You need rest. Whatever it was will not come back to you as long as I’m here, okay? I won’t leave you, but you need to rest."
Through sobs I managed to whimper out an "Okay." I managed to catch a blurry glimpse of his expression, he was trying to smile but he was worried, I could see the trepidation wrinkling his eyes, his forehead. He reached out and smoothed my hair away from my face, with two fingers he smeared the tears off my cheeks.
Still crying, he managed to pull my covers over me as I shuddered violently. They were warm but no number of blankets right now would help banish the fear that grasped me.
"Leorah, I’m going to try to put a cleansing spell on you—kind of like I did for Kit earlier, remember?"
I managed a small nod, barely recalling anything before five seconds ago. Somehow deep in my mind I knew what he was talking about.
"Okay. Now the reason that spell worked so well was because I was channeling positive energy from you, but you don’t have any more to give right now, I can feel that you are drained. Now do you have any herbs? Sea salt?
Anything?"
"I-I think so. Kit would— "
He cut me off, hearing me struggle to speak. "I don’t need much but if I cannot find anything, I’ll call her. I just need some salt or some lavender. I am going to go really quickly to search your kitchen," he reached his other hand out and squeezed my shoulder as the other one continued to smooth my hair down my back. "Okay? You’ll be okay, I’ll be back in a flash."
I tried to nod bravely but I couldn’t.
"Just two seconds," he said pulling away from me, and slowly stepping backwards until he was in the doorway.
Whatever relaxation I had been feeling—and it wasn’t much—escaped the second he left the room. I felt the fear grasp me again, the darkness starting to shroud my eyes. I reached out for him and tried to call out his name but it merely came out as a weak noise.
"I’m here!" he said, and I felt him again, solid yet gentle. He grasped my outstretched hand. "Now, I found this sea salt shaker, okay? It should help, since I can’t draw from your energy. I’m going to sprinkle it around the room but while I do that, I need you to somehow think happy thoughts. Can you do that? Anything happy. Anything joyous at all," he said, shaking a handful of salt into his palm and tossing it on my lower body. "Close your eyes and concentrate on it, feel it as if you were there. Positive energy is everything, and I need something positive from you right now. Anything. I mean it," he instructed.
"Okay," I said, in a small voice. I clenched my eyes shut and recalled just a few seconds ago, how wonderful it felt, how warm it was being close to him. A memory flooded through me then—it was a recent memory but I was having a hard time recalling it. I struggled to pull it out of my mind, finally smiling as I recalled it fully:
It was just about a couple hours ago, in my apartment, cuddling on the couch in Gabriel’s arms. I recalled the way he felt, how warm it was, how he smelled.
I smiled despite myself, and felt my insides warm like spring sun penetrating the ice of a lake.
"Good," he said, some of the panic leaving his voice. "Good. Really good. Keep it up."
There wasn’t much to think about but I remembered the sound of his heartbeat in my ear, strong and steady over and over again as I nuzzled my cheek deeper into his chest. I didn’t mean to but involuntarily I let out a relaxed, "Mmmmm."
Gabriel didn’t say anything, but I heard him rustling about the room, saying something softly under his breath. The more he said, the more terror I felt escaping my body, being replaced with feelings of warmth...like the first rays of sunshine in the springtime after a hard, freezing winter.
"Good," he said again, and I felt his weight on my bed. He grasped my hand again, and pulled it into his lap. "Now, Leo," he said, pulling my palm up to his cheek and squeezing it. I could feel the roughness of his cheek, like sandpaper but it wasn’t unpleasant; it just reminded me that he was here. That I wasn’t alone, and the total darkness that I felt was either not real or was totally gone.
"Now, rest, Leo. You need rest. You don’t need to worry; I will be here. I’ll keep you safe," he said softly.
I nodded, opening my eyes briefly to get another look at him. "Just promise me you won’t go."
He smiled earnestly. "I won’t go anywhere. I won’t even pee, okay? I’ll be right here," he said, pulling his legs into the bed and sliding next to me. He laid down and rested his head on his hand, propped up by his elbow. His other hand was still grasping mine.
I sighed, feeling the solidity of his body next to mine. "Okay," was all I said. My hand went limp in his and I struggled to stay awake although this time, I didn’t feel like I was afraid. I was safe and warm, in my bed next to him. I wasn’t alone. I’d be okay from…whatever it was.
I wasn’t quite sure what time it was when I woke up but the sun was streaming in brightly from the window, at some point the curtains and blinds were drawn open. Before I even opened my eyes I could feel the light beating on my face.
I tried to sit up but I felt weighted down. I turned my head to see the source of the weight, Gabriel’s left arm was draped over my back. He was sound asleep, cuddled up in the blanket from the sofa, his jeans draped over the end of my bed.
"We didn’t—huh?" I asked myself, reaching down to see if my own sweatpants were still on. I breathed a sigh of relief: they were.
At least if I’m going to do that I’d like to remember it!
"Hmm," was all I could say. I tried to pry his arm off me but the second I lifted up my head I felt hammers pounding and stars in my eyes. "Oh god…" I mumbled, giving into the urge to lay back down. I felt as if I had a hangover—at least the way I heard humans describe it. Heavy head, tired and groggy, massive headache. "Hopefully I have enough Tylenol," I mumbled, knowing fully well I didn't have many left.
I tried to ignore the stabbing sensation behind my eyes and laid my head down on my pillow again and turned to look at Gabriel’s sleeping face. I couldn’t hold back a smile, both the fact that he looked so damned cute asleep, and because I realized that I actually had a man in my bed. The thought was preposterous yet, here he was…with his strong, unshaven jaw and messy dark brown hair (this time messy not on purpose) and a pouty mouth. Really, he actually appeared to be pouting in his sleep. I had to stifle a laugh to avoid howling and waking him up.
He stirred and slowly opened his eyes, blinking a handful of times and smiling at me. "Well, hello Gorgeous," he said in a weird voice.
"Huh?" I questioned, blushing. "Gorgeous?"
He chuckled. "A quote from a really old movie. So, how are you feeling?" He asked, quickly changing the subject.
I groaned, trying to prop myself up on my elbows but instead was met with resistance and stabbing pains in my head. "Ugh…well I’m alive but man my damned head hurts."
"But you’re not feeling like, weird or anything? Empty? Depressed?" he asked with concern.
I gave him a blank look. "What do you mean? Why would I feel that? And why we’re on the subject of why, didn’t I leave you on the couch?"
Gabriel immediately shot up. "Whoa, whoa. You mean, you don’t remember anything?"
I blinked. "Remember what?"
He let out a low-whistle. "Damn, Leo. You almost died last night and you don’t even remember? This is probably way worse than I thought—way, way worse…" He reached over and grabbed his jeans on the end of the bed, strategically keeping the blanket positioned over his waist and legs. He patted the pockets for something, and finally pulled his cell phone out of a side pocket. It began ticking as he started typing on it.
"What?" was all I could ask.
"I was asleep on the couch and I heard a scream. It was you! You screamed and I came running in to your bedroom. The entire room was pitch black like—indescribably dark. You were sitting in bed, asleep, acting like you were choking to death, but there was nothing there. I panicked and tried to grab for you, something shoved me away, all I saw was something like a dark flash but there was no light. At all." He began to explain, looking up between beeps on his phone.
My mouth fell open. "What the hell? Shit, I don’t remember a thing!"
"I did the only thing I could think of; I threw a fireball at—well I just threw it. There was nothing to throw it at so…" he trailed off, looking sheepish. "Well I’m sorry I kinda obliterated your nightstand. I hope there wasn’t anything too important on it."
I gasped, sitting up despite the nagging pain and seeing the scorched nightstand on the side of my bed, along with the burn mark on the wall—right through the paint and drywall. "Oh no…"
"I’m sorry! You were—" He sighed. "Well to try to make a stronger fireball I summoned down some moonlight. Light up the entire room and then—poof! —it was gone!"
I shook my head. "Wow, really? What was it?"
He shrugged. "I don’t know," he said, holding up his phone. "I’ve been trying to get a hold of my brother all night to see if he knew anything but, so far I got an ‘I’ll look into it’ message about fifteen minutes after you feel asleep last ni
ght and I haven’t heard from him since."
I frowned at the damage in my bedroom. "Well, that’s one damage deposit I am not getting back," I murmured under my breath.
"Leo, I swear. You were dying. When the—whatever—was gone, you were shaking. Terrified. You were so pale you actually were gray; like you were dead. You were freezing cold; like ice." Gabriel, his lower lip trembling a little reached out and grabbed my hand and held it in both his palms, resting them in his lap. "I’m so sorry, I almost didn’t make it in time. The energy left over in the room was unlike anything I’ve ever felt before. Like, nothing."
"Like nothing was there?" I offered.
"No I mean really, like nothing. Usually any place at all has some sort of energy, some sort of being. But this? There was nothing. No energy. Like a big, black hole. A void," he said, rubbing his thumbs along the top of my hand. "I cast a positive energy spell on you, hoping to disperse any residual...whatever the fuck it was in here last night and help you feel better. You were really freaking out. Like. Really."
"Shit." That was all I could say.
"I was scared to leave you alone so I pulled the blanket in here and wrapped myself up in it and finally fell asleep about two hours after you did. I kept watching you; to make sure whatever happened did not happen again. Or to catch whatever the Hell it was if it did," he shuddered. "Seriously whatever it was…was not good."
"I’m sorry." I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t remember a damn thing, but he was obviously very bothered and shaken by it.
"Sorry?" he asked incredulously. "I’m the one that should be sorry! This sort of thing shouldn’t have happened to you; I should never have— "
I cut him off with a wave of my hand. "Gabriel. I appreciate that but you can’t be with me everywhere, every time. What are you going to do? Follow me to work? Watch me piss?"