by Mark Fuson
Darwin replied calmly, “are you sure it’s the punishment you want, or an end to your suffering?” Darwin replied.
“Do whatever you must do,” Teddy huffed.
“Did you know there’s a name for what’s going on here?” Darwin asked.
“What do you mean?”
“This right here, you and me. We were adversaries and now we’re like an old married couple. There’s a name for it; it’s an actual syndrome. It’s called the Stockholm syndrome. It’s where the hostage begins to relate to the captor, and hostage actually becomes supportive of the captor and the cause. You really should hate me for everything I’ve done to you, but yet you don’t. It’s really quite strange. I was just wondering if this was your way of asking me to end your suffering.” Darwin suggested.
“What about your suffering; when does it end?” Teddy asked in disgust.
Darwin replied simply, “I’m an immortal, I control an entire population, I decide who lives and who dies, and I can do whatever I want.”
Teddy smirked at that. “You have no one to love you. Cindy couldn’t stand you, I know her well enough to say that. She thought you were a good fuck, but that was about all. You could never be what she wanted. You were too obsessed with Steve. You think she didn’t pick up on that? You deny yourself happiness and for what? I’ve fucked a lot of people over the years, male and female. The only one I was truly in love with was Bruce, but it took me years to admit that. We had fun together. I fell into the trap of this town and molded myself into what I thought was expected of me. The jock had to have a beautiful girlfriend—a wife eventually—and then kids. I could have done it, but I didn’t want to and that’s why I dragged my feet after high school. I would have been happier with Bruce, but I refused to be that person publicly, and now you’re doing the same.” Teddy finished in disgust.
Darwin replied returning his eyes to the ground, “life has denied me the opportunity to explore what could have been. At least you had that chance and chose to walk away from it. I never had that choice.”
“I hate being cliché, but there are other fish in the sea,” Teddy offered.
“Is there another Bruce?” Darwin replied.
“Maybe, but I’ll never know unless I look…which seems to be out of the question for me…but for you, another Steve may exist in this world.”
Darwin asked the room as though he was speaking to himself, “even if everything had gone the way I had wanted it to…how would it have been received?”
Darwin looked at Teddy, focused. “Why are we afraid to be who we are…because we’re taught to sit down and shut up? Yes we do, just so a handful of religious nuts can keep their perfect image of a world that doesn’t really exist. I was cruel because I was bigger and stronger; I could do that and hide what I was, what I am. Steve and you were small with little chance to hide it. You got dealt a shit hand. We created our own personal hells because other people demanded it. I think we might be surprised how most people could care less who you fuck. With that said, it doesn’t excuse what I did, or how I did it. I’m the worst kind of person because I helped create you-an angry and astringent monster who is bent on death and destruction. I am guilty.” Teddy confessed.
“You think I’m bent on destruction?” Darwin asked, surprised.
“Aren’t you? A death camp, undesirables, Special Handling…anyone you don’t like is disposed of.” Teddy was shocked this was news to him.
Darwin spoke philosophically as he wandered the room, “I’m actually trying to create a world that is free of drug addicts, assaults, senseless violence, racism…if you can think of something wrong with this world I’m trying to fix it. Maybe I’ve been too heavy handed, but you should see what New Haven has become. Believe me, you wouldn’t recognize it. As for the camp, we’re werewolves; we need human flesh to eat. I wasn’t random in the selection of who dinner was, and who was a guest. Would it have been any more palatable if it had been random? Targeted murder or random, isn’t it all the same?”
Teddy said, “You’re looking out for your people. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few.”
“Was that Marx?” Darwin asked.
“No, Vulcan philosopher Surak, but it is most notably quoted by Spock in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.” Teddy chuckled.
Darwin laughed. “You Trekkie fag!”
“Insults are highly illogical” Teddy shot back with a hint of sarcasm under his tongue.
“Okay Mister Spook, that’s enough!” Darwin said, still chuckling himself.
“It’s Spock!” Teddy barked back, beginning to laugh harder.
“Whatever! Geeze, beam me up anytime,” Darwin said, returning to his stool.
“You’re telling me you never watched an episode of Star Trek in your entire life?”
“No,” Darwin said bluntly.
“Don’t tell me you’re a Star Wars dork?”
“Suck my force, you Trekkie bitch!” Darwin spouted off in defense.
Teddy replied in a Yoda-sounding voice, hoping to poke Darwin a little more. “I knew it! Brain little, this one has.”
“Oh, so you know Master Yoda?” Darwin said, quickly reversing the game.
“It’s not difficult to sound retarded!” Teddy replied.
“Ouch! That hurt!” Darwin grasped his chest, laughing as he did so. “I guess there are no werewolves in Star Trek?”
“No, none come to mind. They did have a shape-shifter in a Next Generation episode. She wasn’t really a werewolf, but she could change into some kind of hairy monster. Why?”
Darwin asked, serious now, “When we were younger, didn’t you ever want to be something supernatural—a vampire or a werewolf?”
Teddy looked up at the ceiling. “I guess I did like some of the vampire flicks. The geeky friend in Fright Night who becomes a vampire, I always wanted to be that guy. Never gave it much thought in being a werewolf.”
Darwin looked down into his hands and said softly, “I always wanted to be a werewolf. I don’t know why…something inside of me always made me want to rip my clothes off and howl at the moon. I remember when I first began to realize what I was. It was surreal, a dream that couldn’t be, but it was. Part of me was frightened and another part of me longed to let go and run wild. I didn’t know what to do with my power.”
“How did it happen?” Teddy asked.
“I don’t know. I just changed one night, and every full moon after that night. I wonder if I was infected, or if I was marked by the underworld. I wasn’t bitten or scratched—like in a classic werewolf movie. I wanted it, I almost wonder if my prayer was answered. It truly is a gift.” Darwin said, continuing to find comfort in his palms.
“What does it feel like?” Teddy inquired with genuine curiosity.
“An orgasm that builds and intensifies across your whole body. Imagine your muscles expanding in size and strength in seconds. Imagine feeling weak and soon it’s gone and you begin to feel powerful. You can’t stop it, and you don’t want to. As your body transforms, the clothing begins to tear away from your body which adds to the immense supremacy that you feel. Your human mind lets go and the thought of killing and eating takes over. You fight it at first, but eventually you give in and then it becomes a pleasure, not a burden. The act of killing recreates the feeling of transformation, which drives you to do it again and again. It’s beyond sexual. It’s not about the food or nourishment, it’s about the high. There are the powers too; the hearing, the strength, the psychic…” Darwin became lost in his description of the power he could barely explain.
“Psychic?” Teddy prodded.
“When you drink the blood, sometimes you can watch the person’s past. Intimate stuff…secret things.”
“So it doesn’t hurt?”
“You can experience pain, but not from the change. Being caught in the snow and freezing in your human form hurts, but it won’t kill you. Anything that can hurt a human might also hurt as a lycan.”
Teddy asked quietly,
“can you die?”
“I think so,” Darwin replied keeping the truth to himself. “So, do you want to become a werewolf?”
“Like this? I’m a fucking freak, just kill me,” Teddy said in frustration.
“Maybe I’m not going to give you a say in the matter. I think you could serve a purpose in our community. You could represent the evils of humanity. The disabilities embodied within you would be a constant reminder to our people how cruel humans can be. Only through the gift can those errors be corrected. You could live a normal life with prosthetics, I think it could work.”
Teddy pleaded, “Darwin, please, just end me. I don’t want to go on living with what I am.”
“What you were. I don’t think you are the same person you were six months ago.” Darwin looked into Teddy’s watered eyes.
Teddy was begging now. “If you care at all for me, like I think you do, please just end me.”
Darwin sat on his stool looking at Teddy’s plea for what it was. Teddy had given himself over to death, freely and with no resistance. Darwin decided he would not drag out the conversation further; the decision was a simple one.
From the end of the room, Darwin stretched a wire cable from a winch and pulled it towards the gurney, hooking the line to grommets on the thick leather strap that secured the lone arm. With the cord affixed, Darwin unhooked the strap from the table, allowing the arm to freely move around. He then turned his attention to the chest strap which was secured but not tight enough. Darwin wrenched on the strap constricting Teddy’s chest, but he still said nothing.
Casually Darwin returned to the winch motor and turned it on. The small machine began to hum and the reel began to roll up the slack. Teddy closed his eyes in anticipation of what was to happen with no protest. He merely mouthed the words: “Thank you”.
The wire became taut and soon the slack in the arm began to dissipate. As the limb became rigid, Teddy’s hand and wrist started to involuntarily point towards the wall. The cartilage and joints popped and contorted but the wire kept pulling. The shoulder and rotator cuff offered the winch some resistance but in quick succession the arm dislocated from its housing. Teddy yelled and cursed in pain but he smiled, as his dues were paid.
The wire momentarily stopped and the motor struggled. The arm was now erect and the only thing left holding it to Teddy’s body was the failing epidermis. The skin, muscle, veins, bones and joints all collapsed under the relentless pull of the cable. Skin at the shoulder tore away, shredding muscle through the biceps and triceps. Teddy prepared himself for the onslaught of pain he knew was coming. Shock was assured and surprisingly Darwin had opted to forgo the adrenaline shot. A minor gift, Teddy thought.
The flesh of the upper arm peeled and fell apart like a few pounds of ground round but the limb released itself from the body, flopping onto the floor and sliding towards the winch. Darwin walked over and turned off the machine just as the arm was beginning to ascend towards the reel. In the silence of the room, Darwin was greeted with the sounds of Teddy Holmes struggling to deal with his agony in a proud and honorable way. The young man winced and choked, but he had ceased his yelling. The pain he knew—the torture he welcomed—and it was death he still anticipated.
Darwin looked at the limbless Teddy and felt pity for him. Blood spurted from the latest catastrophic wound but Darwin made no effort to cauterize it. Instead of medical treatment, Darwin went to a drawer and found himself a 24 gauge one inch, 2cc syringe. He removed the sterile packaging and slapped his own forearm, finding a series of veins rise to the surface. With only an educated guess of how to correctly draw blood, Darwin jabbed himself with the needle in the area of the largest vein. When he pulled back on the plunger no blood filled the needle. He dug around and moved the needle under the skin, pulling back on the plunger every few moments until he finally began to fill the vial with his thick, red fluid. Darwin filled the needle to 1.5cc before removing it from his arm. Without capping the sharp point, Darwin approached Teddy.
The dazed and distraught captive saw Darwin approach with the red vial and knew what Darwin was planning. He pleaded one final time knowing it was for nothing.
“Please I don’t want it this way,” he croaked.
“I know,” Darwin soothed. “Only in life can you truly know suffering. You’re a good person at heart, but you’ll continue to make amends for your life as a human in your new life as a lycan. The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one. Yes Teddy, I may have seen a Star Trek movie or two. Welcome to the family.” Darwin jabbed the needle into the neck, pushing the blood into Teddy’s body.
Teddy screamed, “Noooo!” he cried as he pleaded, but it was done. Darwin’s blood now coursed in his veins and he knew there was no going back.
Darwin assured Teddy as he pet the forehead of his latest creation. “This is a big day and not just for you, but for me as well. I never in my most crazed dreams ever thought I would one; start to like you, and two; save you from death. You’ve helped me grow as an individual, and for that I will always be grateful. I honestly never thought I was capable of change on that level, but I guess I am. Thank you Teddy. I know in time you will come to accept your new life. It will be an adjustment, I know—but it will be fine, I promise.”
“What now?” Teddy asked as a bolt of pain made him cringe, racing through his body. The hole left by his missing arm had already stopped bleeding.
“Now it’s time to eat!” Darwin said with delight.
“Of course it is, enjoy!” Teddy replied feeling violated.
Darwin smiled and retrieved the arm from the floor, unhooked the leather strap and returned to the slab with the hunk of meat.
“My friend, this is the last trace of your humanity. It would be a privilege to devour it, but this is not for me, this is for you. You are now like me and even though this flesh is yours, it is human and you are not. Eat the flesh of your past and move into your future.” Darwin held the arm up to Teddy’s reluctant mouth, but he shied away.
“I’m still human; I don’t feel any different,” Teddy said, knowing it wasn’t entirely true. The smell of his own bloody flesh was making him curious, though he couldn’t escape the idea that he should be appalled by it.
“You are lycan now. Trust me! I’ve done this a few times. When you eat this flesh you change, at least partially. Eat, and let go of your old life.” Darwin pushed the arm and flesh only inches from Teddy’s mouth. A drop of blood rolled down the battered arm and dropped onto a reluctant but yet eager tongue.
Teddy opened his mouth and raised his head, placing his lips into the bloody and torn flesh. His first moments in the meat were like a child unwilling to try a new food, but steadily the taste of blood aroused his primal instincts that were growing inside of him. Teddy took his first small nibble, tugging at a vein and some muscle until it snapped and released to his mouth. With the tissue inside his chops, he chewed slowly for a moment before swallowing. As the meat entered his body, the thrill of the flesh took over and with growing canines the next bite came easily.
Darwin watched his son consume the last of his humanity and experience his rebirth. Darwin was torn with what he had done and the conflict within him made a trip to see Steve an absolute necessity.
Teddy consumed himself saying nothing to Darwin as he chomped through his bone. Darwin quietly excused himself, leaving Teddy in hallway Ten by himself where he could become acquainted to his new emotions and feelings.
Chapter Eight
The drive to the cemetery was a long one. Darwin kept thinking to himself how fast Steve would be spinning in his grave if he learned that Teddy Holmes had been granted immortality. Was it the greatest betrayal that he could have done; or would Steve understand the reasoning? Darwin wasn’t even sure he understood. His gut told him he had done the right thing even if it was for the wrong reasons.
It was a race to the headstone. Darwin sprinted through the paths and markers, not wanting to keep Steve waiting. The last thing he wou
ld want is for Steve to leave and move on. Darwin wasn’t ready for that yet. Steve would be there, upset…but he would be waiting for Darwin. He was certain of it.
The headstone for Steve Cardwen was off on its own, set away from the other dead. It was private and allowed Darwin to speak candidly without the ears of other deceased picking up too much of the conversation. He slowed his sprint as he came into view of the marker. Steve was there, just as Darwin knew he would be. Relief swept through his murky soul but now it was Darwin’s time to explain himself.
Darwin fell to his knees before the rock, his hands to his head now, shaking. “Don’t be pissed. Please don’t be pissed, Steve,” Darwin beseeched. “You have to understand; he’s like you and me. He knows what he did was wrong and he only did it because he had the same fears that you and I did. Can we really condemn him for that? He just had the ability to hide it. If we could have done that don’t you think we would have—even if it had come at the expense of someone else? Don’t you remember how desperate we were, to just be accepted and—normal? He was a coward, he freely admits that, but I think he can be used in a positive way now. I truly think he’s changed.”
Darwin paused, calming down and seemed to listen.
“Yeah, okay. I have my own selfish reason too. Yes, I want to keep him around because of the connection to you. I know it sounds strange but knowing he was tormented inside, just like we were, gives me some satisfaction. I enjoy hearing him talk about you and me, and his perspective on things. What he did, and how he felt. Knowing he attempted suicide and that he gave up his real love to be normal. He was us; we should have been friends, but this damn town, this fucking world made it impossible. Instead we became enemies, and it should never have been that way. He helped me to forgive…I don’t think I’ve ever been able to forgive anyone. If he can reach me, maybe he can reach you, too. Can you see it in your heart to at least try to give him a chance?” Darwin begged and waited.