“Wade?” I say as I walk up next to Lo just as he’s turning away from the front door.
He halts and turns back to the foyer entrance. An entirely different emotion from the one he was wearing two seconds ago passes over his face when he sees me. He beams at me and holds out his hand, asking me to go to him without a word.
Once again, I don’t think about it. My body simply reacts to him as I place my hand in his, and he pulls me to his body, flush against his chest.
“I thought that you gave me the slip.”
I shake my head and glance over at Lo, who is standing there waiting for a cock in her mouth again. “No, this is my roommate, Lola. Lola, this is Wade.”
He reaches one of his hands out, but leaves the other at the small of my back, holding me to him.
“It’s nice to meet you, Lola.”
“You too. Why don’t you both come in? I was just about to leave.”
He looks into my eyes as if he’s asking me if I want him in my place. I nod and step out of his grip before walking back into the apartment with him on my heels.
“Wait,” Lo says, “how did you get past the doorman?”
I turn to look at him and he’s got a knowing smirk on his face. “I own the building.”
Of course he does.
She nods and shuts the door. “Well, that I didn’t know. Let me just grab my things and I’ll be going. Hads, I’ll be down the hall with Owen and Holden. Text me if you need anything, okay?” she says as the three of us walk into the living room, and she picks up her purse.
“Will do, thanks,” I reply while looking up at Wade. I’m dying to feel his lips against mine again. He looks down at me from Lo, and takes in a deep breath. As if he’s just found something prized.
Lola clears her throat, sings out, “Bye,” and she’s gone, the front door closing softly behind her.
My eyes still haven’t left his as his hand comes up and moves a fallen curl from my bun behind my ear. I freeze before glancing down at my attire.
My blonde curls are up in the messiest of buns, I’m in my Whiskey & Yoga T-shirt, his sweatpants from our date, and heather gray socks. I scrubbed my makeup off once I got back to the apartment in order to apply a facial mask, which, thank God, I took off before Lo arrived at home. I’m the definition of chaos, yet he’s looking at me like the way he is, making me feel beautiful and wanted.
“Hi,” I say softly.
His arms tighten around me as he leans down and takes my lips with his. His kiss is pure, raw, and it physically connects us more than any sexual act has with the dozens of men before him.
He riles up my insides and my stomach burns with the sudden onslaught of fireworks. I can feel the static rise up my spine, electrifying my entire body as our lips move slowly together. His tongue slides against mine in this deep, slow kiss. An involuntary moan escapes me, and I couldn’t care less. He makes it difficult to think or remember to breathe.
He renders me defenseless.
One of his hands moves up my tingling spine to the back of my head, holding me to his lips as if he thinks that I’m going to make a run for it, but I don’t think that I would be able to leave these lips of his.
His grin breaks our lips apart and possibly cracks the safeguard around my heart.
“That was a greeting that I could get used to,” he says as he looks down at me.
“I know,” I reply without thinking. I bite my lip at my slip-up and push my body against his, feeling his apparent need for me hit my lower belly.
“I needed to see you.”
“So you said. Why did you come here, though?”
“I just got back from the office, and I couldn’t stay away. That’s all I’m willing to give up.”
“So you did miss me,” I say with a sly smile and kiss his cheek before taking his hand and leading him to the couch.
We both get seated before he pulls me against his side. “Possibly, but as I said earlier . . . I can’t miss something that’s not mine.”
“But you did,” I say as I look up at his features. His bone structure is perfectly symmetrical. His dark hair is tousled with finesse, and his arched brows are just as dark as his lashes. My eyes move to his angular jaw and really, his looks should be illegal. The softness in his eyes does something to me at the apex of my thighs when I notice that he’s inspecting me as I am him.
“I did,” he murmurs before adding, “you look gorgeous like this. Just you.”
Suddenly I feel self-conscious and frown. “If I’d had more time, I would have at least put on mascara and lip-gloss.”
“No, this is my favorite look on you, Hadley . . . or Hads . . . as your roommate called you.”
My cheeks burn from him calling me Hads; not many people have, and he just broke the mold on every man for me. I know in my heart of hearts that I won’t recover from him because he’s going to break me without my knowing it. He wants it. I can see how thirsty he is to have the truth. The queen of hearts may have just doused my heart with red—he’s going to make me bleed out.
“You can call me that.”
“And you can keep my sweatpants. They look a hell of a lot better on you than they ever did on me.”
My smile falls when he reminds me that I’m wearing his clothing.
His chuckle rumbles through his chest. “I think you missed me as well.”
“I . . .” Did I? Was this an unconscious way in which I was telling myself that I wanted to be with him? How odd.
He decides to let it slide. “Was I interrupting anything?”
“Hmm? Oh, no. I was just going to lounge around tonight. If you decided to show up twenty minutes earlier, you would have seen me covered in a facial mask. A green one at that, and you would think I was hideous.”
He laughs again and adjusts me so that I’m straddling his lap. I automatically grind my hips into his, feeling his need for me rub against the thickness of his pants.
He lets out a harsh breath and crashes his lips into mine, kissing me with apparent need. It’s verging on violent, but it’s hot as hell. I take a deep breath of driftwood, whiskey, and spice. He smells incredible and addictive and of pure masculinity.
He shifts to lay me on my back on the couch and climbs on top of me, never taking his lips off of mine as he does. “I could do this for hours.”
“Me too,” I say breathlessly just as his tongue steals another breath of mine away. My body molds to his as his hands roam down my curves, touching me as if I’m breakable. He doesn’t grope or slap or pinch; he just touches me. His hands never wander to my ass or my breasts or even the apex of my thighs. A man has never treated me like glass before, and it shocks me a bit. Like the electricity that was running up my spine has splintered off and bolts of it hit my skin with every touch he lays on me. I will my thoughts away and focus on his touches and his lips.
I’m completely lost in him when I hear Lola. “Oh sh—I’m so sorry,” she says with a gasp.
Wade looks up at her but doesn’t bother getting off of me; it’s as if he’s telling me that he’s not done yet. I wonder what we must look like: him dressed to the nines in a designer suit and me in sweats.
“I uhm, I figured I could grab a bottle of wine since it’s been over an hour. I didn’t expect you two to still be here.”
It’s been over an hour? I’ve been kissing him for that long? My God, it feels like I just got his first kiss. I push myself up from underneath him and touch my lips, feeling just how swollen and tender they are. When I look at him, he’s already watching me with needy eyes.
His lips are red and inflamed from me and triumph soars through my body.
“It’s okay, Lo,” I say as I cup his cheek, not looking away from him for a second.
“All right, well, did you want to join us for a late dinner?”
“No, we’ll order in,” Wade says without glancing up at her. I’m reveling in his eyes, and I don’t plan on moving anytime soon.
“No problem. There are a bunc
h of take-out menus in the kitchen’s junk drawer. Enjoy,” she says proudly before leaving the apartment.
His lips find mine again, but this time his kiss is chaste. “I should feed you and then get going. It’s past ten.”
“I’m not in the mood for pizza or Chinese.”
“What are you in the mood for then?”
“You,” I say honestly.
His smile lights up the darkened room, and I swear he just burnt a hole in my heart’s defense.
“I know the feeling,” he says as he pushes his hard cock against me.
“But you won’t give it to me.”
“No, I won’t because I won’t lose you over a fucking orgasm.”
I still and blanch. Lose me?
“You know what I mean.” He adds, “I should get going before this becomes too much to abstain from.”
“Oh.”
I feel like that armor that he was slowly chipping away at just re-erected itself; the walls become impenetrable and more weather resistant than before.
He gets up and offers me a hand, but I refuse it and stand up on my own. I’ve gone from swooning to upset in a matter of two seconds. I wasn’t asking him to fuck me or deliver an orgasm; I just wanted to be around him. Jesus. I might be a skank, but for some reason, I don’t feel the need to be one around him. And he just insisted that I was one. Asshole.
He moves toward me, and I hold out a hand to halt him. “You should go,” I say as I pull his sweatpants down and step out of them, leaving me in white lace boyshorts. I lean over and pick up his sweatpants before shoving them into his arms and retreating to my bedroom.
The asshole hurt me. He actually upset me. I fight back the unwanted tears, and I shut my bedroom door and get into bed in the dark, not giving a crap whether I see him again.
Lie.
I bury myself underneath my cool comforter and hold onto it as if I’ll drift away if I let go. The bed dips and my stomach sinks even further.
“Hadley.”
“I said go, Wade.”
He shifts and stands. It’s silent for a minute or two until the bed dips on the other side and the comforter lifts. His arms come around me and pull me into his hold. I keep my eyes shut because I don’t want to see him. I don’t want to see what he thinks of me.
I might know who I am, but for some reason seeing it in his eyes kills everything inside of me.
He brings me closer and wraps me securely in his arms. I bring my arms up and push away from him, but when my hands touch his bare chest, I still.
“I’m not going anywhere. Talk to me. What happened?”
I remain quiet and despite my earlier attempt at pushing him away, I curl up into his arms and rest my cheek against his chest. I hear him breathe in deeply as he places a kiss on the top of my head.
The war waging inside of me settles down as I shut my eyes, feeling safe even though I’m mad at him . . . myself . . . the world. I didn’t mean to, but I fall asleep in his arms into a dreamless sleep.
It’s two in the morning, and I’m still in Hadley’s bed. She’s been asleep in my arms, murmuring things, since just past ten in the evening.
I should leave. I need to leave, but I cannot bring myself to let her go. No woman should be this beautiful while she sleeps, but she defies everything that a woman should be. I remove the headband from her hair and watch her curls fall around her face and onto my chest.
I move my hand across her face to slide the curls behind her ear and lean in to place a kiss on her lips. She’s addicting, and I know that I’m a fucking goner when she sighs contently and nuzzles into me.
I know that I wounded her earlier, but I’m still trying to figure out what I said that made her want to give me up so effortlessly. She just took my sweats off and dismissed me. I couldn’t leave knowing that I was the reason for the scowl on her face. She shifts and moves her hand around my torso in her sleep. We’re intertwined and for once, it doesn’t bother me to have a woman need me.
It’s one of the reasons for my rules. As much as sex is a part of our human nature as well as nurturing, I’m not attracted to a needy woman. My mother raised me on her own and never once needed a man to take control or tell her how to live her life. Today, women come to me looking for just that: a man who will ultimately consume and control them and their needs. Some men may relish having a woman solely rely on them, but to me it’s a turn-off. However, having Hadley need me right now is something that I’m all right with. For her I’ve broken almost every rule I’ve kept for the past ten years, and I don’t regret doing it—yet.
Her bare leg moves between the two of mine, and I pull her lower body closer. She stirs and her eyes flutter open. “Hi,” she murmurs.
“I didn’t mean to wake you, my apologies.”
“Are you leaving?” she asks as her body clings to me, begging for me to stay.
“Would you like me to?”
She doesn’t respond, and I think that she’s fallen back asleep, but then she nuzzles me and speaks again. “No. I’m comfortable.”
I chuckle and pull the comforter up higher on her. “Then I’ll stay.”
“But I thought that you needed to go,” she says through a yawn.
“I did, but I would not give this up for anything.”
She smiles up at me before lowering her head and closing her eyes again. “’Night, Whiskey.”
“Goodnight, Rye.”
I’m startled awake. My throat is too dry, and I have a slight headache. I’m unaware of what day or time it is. It takes me a few seconds to realize where I am at first. Hadley. I’m at her place. I look down at her in my arms, and I don’t think that either of us has moved since I fell asleep. I look over her comforter at the alarm clock. It’s past four in the morning, and I’m very much aware of how content it makes me feel with the knowledge that I have a few more hours with her in my arms before I go back to the fast-paced real world.
There’s a knock on her bedroom door before it opens. My back is to it, so I assume that it’s her roommate. I’m about to let her know that I’m still here when a male voice interrupts the silence of the room.
“Hads? I knocked twice, but I figured I’d just let myself in.”
Hadley doesn’t shift or even wake at the sound of his voice. Who the fuck is this? I turn to face the darkness, trying to figure out where the hell this son of a bitch is in her bedroom.
He must hit the bench at the end of the bed because he curses. “Jesus, babe, we need to get rid of this shit before I break my leg. Are you awake?”
“Who the fuck are you?” My voice booms in the quiet room, vibrating with power and command, anger splitting every ounce of quiet reprieve that we were in moments before.
“What the fuck is going on?” he says to himself.
I reach over and turn on the light on her nightstand. It takes me a few tries, but when I finally get it on, there’s a fucking hipster-looking punk at the end of the bed.
“Get the fuck out,” I demand.
“Who the hell are you and why are you with my girl?”
His girl? Fuck that.
Hadley sits up and gasps, “Holden, get out.”
“Hads, who the hell is this asshole?” He gestures toward me.
“That doesn’t matter, Holden. You need to leave. You can’t just come into my apartment unannounced, expecting to get your dick sucked.”
“You’ve never complained before,” he says as his eyes roam over her and then move to me, sizing me up.
“Leave, Hold.”
“Fuck this,” he says. “Is this the fucker that you were on the phone with when I ate your pussy?”
My entire body goes rigid. This motherfucker has had her? I throw the comforter off of the bed and charge toward him. My hand comes around his neck, and I shove him against the wall as he tries to land a punch on my jaw.
In that frozen second, I see my mistake as his other hand, apparently his dominant one, comes up and hooks my jaw, greeting me with daggers to my
face. My head swings to the other side, but I don’t relent or give up my grip on his neck. My other hand comes up, and I bring his head forward and then slam it back against the wall, leaving an indent in the drywall behind him.
“Stop,” Hadley’s voice breaks me from the brawl, and I step back from the fucker who is gripping the back of his bloodied head.
I look over my shoulder at her as a sudden gush of pain hits me in the jaw again, in the same spot as the last. I snap my head to face him and lick the corner of my lip, which is now stained with blood. I charge at him and slam my head into his forehead, not giving a fuck about who he is. He doesn’t see the movement coming, and his head knocks back from my impact. He stumbles backward and hits her dresser.
She runs up to me and puts both of her hands on my chest. “Wade, stop, please,” she begs and the shadows don’t dissolve. The darkness takes over my thoughts.
“You motherfucker,” the shitbag says as the bedroom door opens and Lola stands in the doorframe.
“What is going on?” she cries out and looks from Hadley to me and then to the shitbag leaning against the dresser.
“Lola, get Holden out of here, please,” Hadley says as she looks up at me, pleading with me for something. What, I don’t fucking know. It only ignites my rage, and I want to go after him again. I want to damage him for touching her. I’m about to lunge forward when she pushes on my chest. My eyes dart down to hers, and it’s now that I feel her hands burning into my chest. I’m achingly aware of her presence, and I remind myself of who I am, instead of this agile beast that took over.
“Fuck this,” I say and move away from her, grabbing my shit and striding out of her bedroom. She comes hauling ass around the corner when I swing the apartment door open to walk out.
“Wade, please, don’t leave.”
I turn, hostility on my face. I’m fucking fuming, and I cannot be with her while I can barely contain myself. I’ll hurt her because that’s exactly what tonight just did to me. It fucking destroyed me.
I shake my head and step out, slamming the door behind me as I stride down the hallway. I get to the elevator and punch the down button more times than necessary before the doors open. Once I’m inside, I dress quickly before pacing back and forth in the small space, smashing my fist into one of the oversized mirrors. It cracks underneath the pressure of my fist just as the doors open, and I glide out. Out of the building, down the stairs, and out of her fucking life.
Blended (Redemption #1) Page 9