by Evie Harper
If I want it all back, I need to figure out a way to come to terms with what Ivy did. And in a way where I don’t feel weak either. Because no matter how much I’ve grown over the past months with Ivy, I can’t completely bend yet, not if the person I love doesn’t understand bending this much is almost breaking me.
“All right, I’m not gonna fuck around. I’ve called this family meeting because there’s something you all need to know.” Slater speaks confidently but there’s tension in his eyes. “Piper, Mack, and Lana already know.” Slater looks to me, Della, and Pacer. “I’m sorry, Mack found out by accident and when he confronted me I had to be honest. Piper knows because I keep nothing from her, hence why I know Lana probably knows too.” We all look to Mack and Lana, who are standing by the window leaning against one another. Mack grins and Lana blushes. “Not that I keep secrets from you all, this was more of a dream than anything else.” Inhaling and exhaling heavily, Slater continues, “I want a fresh start for us all. I want us all to move, not to another city or state, but to a whole new country. Where we can start a new mechanic business and where the surname King will mean nothing to anyone.”
Silence fills the room. Slater’s gaze bounces from me to each of my siblings, anxiety slipping into his expression. This may be his dream, but I know my brother; if we don’t all want the same thing he’ll forgo his own needs to keep us together.
My breaths stall and adrenaline races through my veins. A new beginning. A fresh start.
“Which country? When?” Della asks, her gaze darting from Dom to Slater. Della asks what everyone’s thinking. We each have loved ones now, even Pacer with his niece, Ava. Would they all leave the country for us? Could we leave them behind to follow our family?
“From my research, Perth in Australia or Zurich in Switzerland are my top picks for places to live. Their cultures offer the most promise for us to thrive. For this to work we’d need the two million dollars. We Kings will need to buy birth certificates and passports off the black market and then get medicals for the visas, buy property and houses, a new place for our business. Della, the O’Connors might even have a copy of your birth certificate. After staying in the country for two years, we can apply for permanent residency.”
My sister glances back to Dom, biting the inside of her cheek and frowning. Dom cups her face and says, “Baby, don’t look so worried. Where you go, I go, always.” Dom looks to Slater. “My best friend Jake’s wife owns a farm in Australia. They rave about it all the time, how secluded it is and peaceful. If there’s a vote, Australia gets mine.”
“Noted,” Slater states.
Della smiles, but before speaking she looks to me and my brothers. “I’m in, as long as all my brothers are too.”
“I’m in,” Mack and Lana announce together.
“I’m in,” Pacer declares in a faraway tone.
Glancing to him, I catch him staring toward the stairs. Sophie took Ava to Della’s room when she heard about the family meeting, offering the privacy she thought we’d ask of her. We wouldn’t have, though—she saved me, saw me kill a man, and still trusts us with her life and her daughter’s. There isn’t much more she could know that would harm us, and I guess, in our own way, we trust Sophie.
All eyes turn to me, and I know what I want. “I’m in,” I reveal. “I need time to see if Red is coming with me.” I don’t say I’m unsure that I can leave without Ivy. My whole family looks too happy for me to shatter this moment.
Slater stands and punches the air. “Yes.” It’s a little shock to see my eldest brother this excited; it’s not something we see often, which tells me and all my siblings we’re doing the right thing. Slater has held us up for so long, and it’s time to give him the peace he needs for the next stage of his life.
A little sob comes from Piper. As tears fall down her cheeks, she rubs her growing tummy. “This is it, guys, what you all deserve, a new beginning, one with a bright and beautiful future.”
So keeping the advantage is not a want, it’s a must, for our future and for our family.
Today's race is a snippet of what death race will bring; it’s a teaser for the spectators.
The race is tag team. Pacer starts and I finish. Death race is similar; all racers who registered have to be in the car during the dangerous race, and when we hit check points, we must change drivers.
Except today Pacer and I drive in our own cars and there’s no actual race. It’s all about the quickest times. There’s an 800-meter track. Pacer starts at the beginning, and I will be waiting at the 400-meter line. The trick is that Pacer has to tap my car with his, and there’re rules. The tapping can’t push the car over the line, or the driver has to back up and start again, which takes extra time. Pacer also can’t be doing less than fifty upon reaching my line. So finishing at the right speed and not crashing into the other person is an obstacle the judges must take pleasure in seeing drivers overcome. Pacer and I have a plan, though, and I hope to fucking hell we can pull it off.
Each top ten team will do the same today, and at the end we’ll have our starting places for death race. We drive into the strip and park in our usual spot on the right side of the race track. I park first, then Slater to my right and then Pacer in his green Dodge. Mack, Lana, and I fold out of my car as Piper, Dom, and Della hop out of Slater’s. Sophie and Ava jump out of Pacer’s car. Ava’s eyes are bright with excitement, taking in the many different people and cars as “Good Life” by G-Eazy and Kehlani blasts from the stereo speakers around the field.
The family was torn about bringing Ava here. With the clubs, gangs, and flowing alcohol, this isn’t a place for a child. However, Pacer insisted we all stay together, and with memories of the long drive home with Rex’s threat that he’d already got to Piper, I had to agree with Pace. Krazy is out there somewhere, and if Sophie is right about his insane ass, he won’t give up on trying to get her back. He thinks he owns her.
Sophie has told us very little about how she got caught up with the bikers, but what she said was that Krazy tricked her, didn’t show his true colors until it was too late for her to get out. And I believe her. She’s a smart chick, really on the ball with things. She doesn’t strike me as the kind of woman who would let herself or her kid get involved with men as evil as Krazy.
Stepping away from the cars, my brothers and I head toward Mickey’s caravan to sign up for today's trial. Sensing Ava bouncing around our legs, I glance down and pick up the little girl, placing her on my shoulders. She coughs from the kicked-up dirt in the air and hangs on to my neck.
As we pass through the crowds, the loud chatter turns to hushed whispers and anxious stares. We used to live for this, seeing the fear in people’s eyes. Better their fear than a possible enemy. Now, I’m exhausted, and with the future looking a lot different to what I thought it would be, I can’t help but not give a shit about appearing powerful or scary. I only need to get this done today and then go see Ivy. My heart speeds up at the thought of seeing my favorite color of Red today. Life has seeped back into black and white; even with looking forward to the future, all I want is to work things out with my girl, and pray she wants the same thing.
After signing in, we check the ranking as it stands now. None of the names surprise us, they’re the same names we’ve been seeing all year long.
First place is the street gang Cuba Snakes.
Second is the street gang Colombia Blood Angels.
Third place is us.
Fourth place is the Parkland Poison Boys, followed by the Mexican Reapers, Ohio Wolves, and the Nashville Crows. All three are motorcycle clubs. The last three spots are taken up by nobodies, car enthusiasts. Their times are so far behind the top seven they aren’t worth worrying about.
The MC bikers are similar, which is why they’re all grouped together; they’re bikers, not racers. However, they are still a massive hurdle to get past before we can win death race. The bikers know they can’t win with pure driving skills, so they’ll be the first ones to bring out t
he guns.
The street gangs are similar to us; they’re our real competition. They drive with a purpose or for the love of it. They’ll be skilled and have tricks up their sleeves and weapons. We already know we can handle the Poison Boys, and with a request from Lana we won’t hurt them unless we have to. Unless it’s a live-or-die situation. Slater quickly agreed when Mack asked on behalf of Lana. With Rex gone, we’ve had no more trouble from Corey, Kodi, or Reed. I’m actually surprised they haven’t pulled out of the race altogether, but then I guess it’s difficult to turn your back on two million dollars when you have a one-in-ten shot at winning it.
We head back to the rest of the family. Sophie meets Ava and me halfway. Something behind Sophie catches my eye, and I peer around her. My driver-side car door is open, and woman’s ass is hanging out of it.
Marching over with Ava still on my shoulders, I throw up a hand to Dom who’s also about to approach the stranger in my car.
When I get close, I realize who it is. “Becca?” I call.
Ivy’s best friend jumps and knocks her head on the interior of the roof. “Fuck,” she hisses.
Stepping out of the car, rubbing her head with a pinched expression, she opens one eye and looks at me with guilt written all over her face.
“Is there a reason you’re in my car?”
Becca lowers her hand and opens both eyes, her mouth opening and then closing when she looks up at Ava on my shoulders, and then to Sophie, who’s standing to my right. Becca’s mouth hangs wide open, but not for long. She closes it and looks back into my car, and then at me. “Shit,” she mutters. Looking back at me, she says, “I’m gonna need some Harry Potter spell shit to fix my best friend after this. Vodka isn’t gonna cut it.” Her words are clear, but her eyes aren’t focused on me.
I step forward, concern churning in my gut. “Is Ivy okay?”
Becca’s eyes track back to Ava and then to Sophie, and swing to me. Her chin lowers, and she speaks barely above a whisper. “No. No, she won’t be.”
Gripping Ava’s waist and settling her on the ground with her mom, I say to Sophie, “I need a minute.”
Sophie nods and speaks to Ava. “Come on, cutie, let’s go annoy Pacer.”
Becca watches them leave and then swings to me. She points to my face and then gestures to her head. “This second I’m hoping you get struck by lightning. Five days.” She ends on a hiss. “Boy, didn’t take you long, and an instant family. Wow.” Becca slaps her hands on her hips and turns toward the deserted track. “Oh God, getting Ivy to stay now will be impossible.”
Brows dropping, I demand, “What the fuck do you mean, ‘getting Ivy to stay’?”
Becca rubs her temple. “None of your goddamn business now.”
I grit my teeth, my patience snapping. “You got it all wrong,” I growl. “Sophie and Ava aren’t with me.” Becca finally spins around, and now that she’s paying attention my anger settles and I speak more gently. “Ava is Pacer’s niece, and Sophie is… well, I have no idea what she is to Pacer or my family, but they’re in trouble and we’re looking out for them. That’s it, I swear.”
Becca exhales deeply. “Thank God.”
“How is Ivy?” I ask nervously.
Becca’s shoulders slump. “She’s devastated she hurt you. She thinks it would be best if she left Louisville.”
“What the fuck!” I yell, a sudden icy feeling hitting my core.
“Exactly what I said,” Becca replies, throwing her arms up in the air. “So you’d care if she left?”
“Fuck yes. Fuck. Fuck. I was coming to see her after my race today. Things got messed up and I’ve needed time to get my head around it all, but I’ve come to the conclusion Ivy Johnson is the love of my life and I will not lose her.”
Becca squeals, jumping toward me and hugging me. “I knew I liked you for a reason.” Becca backs up, smiling. She looks to my car and then back to me. “Seriously, I need to write this all down, you guys would make a great love story.”
My gut still twisted up, I ask, “She’s not leaving today, is she? Do I have time?”
Becca shakes her head. “You have time. Every time she packs a box, I unpack a box. And as backup I’ve hidden her GHD flat iron. She won’t leave the house, let alone the state, without that bad boy.” Becca winks at me.
Laying a hand over my stomach, I laugh long and hard. She’s right, Ivy loves her GHD. I have no idea why, I adore the curls in her hair, but Ivy hates them.
“Kelso!” Pacer yells. Glancing to my brother, I can see we need to get our cars in the lineup.
“I gotta go. So Ivy will be home today?”
“Yes. I joke around because it’s how I deal with intense situations, but honestly, she’ll be home because she’s too sad to go anywhere or do anything apart from work.”
I nod. “I promise, I’m going to fix that.”
Becca grins. “I will make myself scarce then. See you round, Kelso.” With those final words, Becca turns and walks away.
Pulling my car door open, I almost get in, but then remember why I was speaking to Becca in the first place. She was in my car fiddling with something. When I turn to yell out to her I find she’s gone, disappeared into the crowd. Shrugging, I take a seat and close my door.
“You ready, Kel?” Slater asks, leaning his elbows on my open window.
“Fuck yes. Let’s get this done, I got a redhead to see.”
Slater grins and hits the roof. “You got this, brother. Kings!” He ends with a chant.
With Pacer ready in his car and Mack standing nearby, the three of us echo our eldest brother’s chant. “KINGS!”
21
A Simple Truth
Kelso
Drumming my fingers on the steering wheel, I wait for the flags to go down and the trial to begin. I switch my radio to CD because I have a string of songs that get me in the mood, the beat syncing with the switch of the gears and the adrenaline surging through my body.
“Hey, Kel,” Ivy’s soft, melancholy voice fills my car. My heart leaps and my pulse quickens. A CD from Ivy; that’s what Becca was doing in my car.
“When I was a little girl, I watched all the Disney movies and read all the stories. My mom told me I knew all the lines and would recite them with a robot Prince Charming, which I made of used boxes and stockings filled with newspapers for arms and legs.” Ivy giggles, but even through the stereo I know her smile never reached her eyes. “She swears I even fell in love with the robot, because I cried for a whole week when my dad threw it away thinking it was rubbish. He made me a new one, but Mom said I didn’t look at the new robot the same. My smile didn’t reach my cheeks, she would say.” Ivy inhales deeply. “She said my heart was as loud as a lion, but also as guarded as one.
“Right before she passed away, my mom told me life would be hard and sometimes I’d have to wade through thick and difficult times. She made me promise her I wouldn’t give up, not on myself or on finding happiness. I always thought she’d meant our family, to stick it out through thick and thin, because she wouldn’t be there to keep us together. I don’t believe that anymore, and when I think back, there was no reason for her to worry about my dad and me, back then when we all still had hope. We were unified and strong.
“Now I realize my mom meant me, love, and my life. I was guarded, and I didn’t realize until I met you, Kelso King. I hadn’t known what fierce love was until you let me in.
“Maybe by now you’re wondering why I’m telling you this, why I’ve spoken my deepest thoughts onto this CD for you. Well, because I can’t let you go, not without a fight first.
“I promised you if I saw you I would pretend you weren’t there, but right now in my bedroom, surrounded by the shirts you left behind and your scent on my sheets, all I can do is remember…
Memories of loving you.
Memories of talking with you.
Memories of laughing with you.
Memories of speaking about my mom with you.
“Memories o
f talking about your family. Your smiles. Learning about you and how you hate it when I don’t put the lid on the toothpaste. And no matter how cold it is, you must have at least one foot out of the blanket.
“Memories of my regrets. The tears that spilled onto you when you comforted me, and the tears that have spilled with nowhere to land because I lost you.
“I should have guarded your secret, your innocence. Instead I tried to guard myself as my mother told me I always did. Instead of letting my father feel the consequences of his actions, I guarded him as well. A daughter trying to save her relationship with her father. I was a fool. I used to ask the sky all the time, why give me a man to look up to if all along they would rip him away from me.
“Then you entered my life, Kel, and you quickly became the source of my joy. I only ever wanted to be that for you too, but I failed. I wish I could say I was lost, but I won’t ever lie. I never felt that way. I only ever felt at home and safe with you.
“I will always love you. It’s a simple truth. I want you back, and not for my own selfish reasons, but to prove to you secrets can be kept, promises can be buried deep and honored. I swear to you, a pack of wild dogs could never tear your secrets from my lips again.
“I’m begging for another chance, Kel, one I swear I’ll cherish with everything I am. Sometimes we will fly and sometimes we will fall, but I only ever want to do either with you.”