“I was thinking about how she used to look at me, like I was her whole world one minute, and then I’d say something stupid, and she’d roll her eyes and look right through me, it seemed. Like she was thinking something like, You’re an asshole, but, God, I love you.” He nodded. “You know that look? Ever see it?”
“I think I grew up with it. That’s how my mom used to look at all of us, and I’m sure I saw it from Pierce and Ross a few dozen times.”
Butch shook his head. “Nah, this is different. This couldn’t come from anyone but a woman who loved you like a lover, not a mother or a sibling.” He took another bite of his sandwich, and when he was done eating, he sighed. “I’d give anything to see that look again.”
Wes draped an arm over his shoulder. “I’m sorry, Butch. I wish I could bring her back.”
“So do I, Wes. So do I.”
“How did you know Roxy was the right woman for you?”
He shrugged. “I didn’t know she was the right one. I knew she was the only one.”
Wes could see from the sadness in Butch’s eyes that he was having a hard time today. He loved Butch like family, and he hated seeing him sad.
“Do you want to have a drink or something later, before I leave for camp?”
“Nah. You have a pretty little filly waiting for you. I appreciate the thought, though.” Butch splayed his hands on the picnic table and pushed to his feet. He set a hand on Wes’s shoulder. “Have a good time on that overnight, Wes. And for the record, I trust your gut as much as I trust my own.”
After Wes finished eating, he checked on the horses and found Cutter going over the budget and inventory in the barn office. Wes stood in the doorframe watching him. He was meticulous about the work, and Wes was thankful for his willingness to do the work Wes knew he could never do. He was smart and he could be detail oriented, but Chip was right—he had an aversion to paperwork that he just couldn’t shake.
“Hey,” Cutter said.
“Hey.” He felt guilty for not promoting Cutter, and as he watched him drag his finger across the color-coded lines he’d constructed, he began to reconsider his position. “Thanks for doing all you do around here, Cutter.”
Cutter cocked his head and nodded. “Sure. Do you need me to do something? I saddled Trina for your lesson.”
“Great, thanks. I don’t need anything. I just wanted to say thanks.”
A smile spread across Cutter’s face. “No problem. Glad I could help.”
Ten minutes later, Wes was still thinking about Cutter’s dedication to the ranch as he climbed the porch steps to Callie’s cabin. He heard the girls talking around back.
“Every time I tried to date a man who wasn’t a cowboy, I was disappointed. A man who doesn’t smell like he can roll in the hay just isn’t right for me.”
He recognized Christine’s sarcastic tone and followed it around the cabin to the back deck, where they were stretched out on Adirondack chairs in their bikinis.
“So you’re married to a cowboy?” He arched a brow at Christine.
Sweets bounded onto the deck with her tail wagging and licked Callie’s legs. Callie smothered her with kisses.
“No. Billy’s a carpenter,” Christine answered. “But he puts on chaps at bedtime and lets me call him Tex.”
“Ride ’em cowboy,” Kathie cheered.
Wes couldn’t tear his eyes from Callie in a yellow string bikini that rode high on her hips. Her belly was narrow along her hips and curved up a little along the center in a sexy, feminine, barely there pillow that was so inviting, Wes wanted to lay his head down on it and wrap his arms around her. His eyes slid north, and he was a little envious of the triangular pieces of stretchy material clinging to her breasts. He drank her in as she sat there with one knee bent and the other stretched out in front of her, loving up the dog he adored. He wanted to feel her against him, run his tongue along every inch of exposed skin, then slowly make his way to the hidden parts.
Callie’s cheeks flushed, and he realized he was staring. He shifted his eyes away.
“Ready to go for a ride?”
All of the girls laughed.
Christ. He shook his head to brush off the sprinkle of embarrassment. “I’m kind of outnumbered here. I have a feeling that anything I say will be twisted into a double entendre.” Wes ran his hand down his face, but his smile refused to be quelled.
Callie rose to her feet and, good Lord, seeing her stand before him in that barely there bikini made a certain southern region of Wes rise, too. He shoved his hands in his pockets.
“Let me get changed and I’ll be right down.” Callie went inside.
“Sit. Enjoy the shade.” Bonnie patted the empty chair.
“Why aren’t you lying on the grass in the side yard, where it’s sunny?”
“You mean there’s no sun here?” Christine asked with wide eyes. “No wonder I’m not getting tan.”
“The sun was perfect until about ten minutes ago, when it slipped behind the trees.” Bonnie lowered her voice. “So, you’re going to teach her how to ride?”
“Hopefully.” Although after seeing her in that tiny bikini, his body had other things in mind.
“And you’re going steady?” Kathie locked eyes with Wes.
“Kathie.” Bonnie swatted her arm.
“What?” Kathie swatted Bonnie back.
“Yeah, I guess you could call it that.” Jesus, were they going to rib him like his siblings would?
Kathie leaned closer to him. “So, tell us the truth. Do you read the books you ask her to pick out for you each week, or did you ask her to do that just so you could get to know her?”
Did all women know what men were really up to, or did they just fish until they got the answers?
“Okay, I’m ready.” Callie stood in the doorway, wearing a three-quarter-sleeved light blue shirt that clung to her curves and, he assumed, the cutoffs he’d bought for her. Her toned legs disappeared into a pair of cowgirl boots, heightening her allure.
Damn, you are scorching hot. Her timing was perfect to rescue Wes from her friends’ inquisition. He reached for Callie’s hand, which she took with a quick glance at her girlfriends. He didn’t miss the way her eyebrows lifted or the excited smile she was trying to mask.
“Enjoy your downtime because we leave in a few hours for camp.”
Kathie and Christine lay back with a sigh and closed their eyes.
“Good luck, Cal. Remember, you can do this. You’re strong and brave, and you’ve got your own personal wrangler, so no excuses.” Bonnie made a shooing motion with her hand. “Go. Have fun.”
WALKING THROUGH THE property with Wes made everything feel different. His hand was big and warm, and Callie’s heart had forgotten how to pitter-patter altogether. He sparked a combination of frenetic heartbeats and tingling of her nerves, and she loved every second of the sensations that had quickly become familiar. They were crossing the footbridge at the base of the hill when Wes stopped and folded her into his arms.
He leaned down and kissed her softly. God, she loved his tender and sweet kisses, especially knowing that behind that tenderness, passion brewed. She felt him holding back when she rocked her hips into his. When their lips parted, she almost pulled him into another kiss; then she remembered that this beautiful place, this perfect, romantic spot, with the creek rippling beneath them and the horses grazing in the fields, was his workplace.
“You look cute as hell in those shorts.” He took her hand, and they continued across the bridge toward the barn.
“Thanks. They were a gift from a secret admirer.” She glanced up at him, and he smiled.
“I’m afraid you’ve ruined any chance I had at being a secret anything.” He squeezed her hand. “No one here has ever seen me with a girlfriend, so we should probably expect a few strange looks.”
Girlfriend. She tucked that simple word that made her head spin into a secret place to swoon over later.
Two men on horses waved to Wes as they crossed th
e grass toward the riding arena. He waved back and tightened his grip on Callie’s hand.
“Are you sure you want to be so open about us? I don’t want to cause any trouble for you.” Callie thought of her own job. She couldn’t exactly stop shelving books and give Wes a passionate kiss in the middle of the library or hold his hand as she moved from one task to the next. Prim and proper Alice would have a heart attack. She might have a heart attack.
“As sure as I’ve ever been about anything.” He lifted her hand to his lips and kissed it.
Wow.
They walked the rest of the way in silence, passing the main riding area to a small round pen that couldn’t have been more than sixty feet in diameter. A white horse was waiting for them, saddled up and ready to ride. The smell of horses and leather wafted through the air. Wes drew in a deep breath and smiled.
“You really love the ranch, don’t you?”
“So much it’s hard to put into words. I can’t imagine not being able to look at that view or not knowing that at any moment I can jump on a horse and ride up the mountains or down to the river. I can sleep under the stars, and if I had to, I could forage for food and live in the wilderness.” He ran his hand through his hair. “It’s freeing. No walls, hard work.” He shrugged. “I guess I’m simple.”
“That’s hardly simple.” She thought of him roping the steer and fearlessly saving her from the horse she’d been unable to control.
He placed his hands on her arms just below her shoulders and gazed into her eyes. “I know you’re nervous about all of this, the horse, camping… But I hope you’ll see how serene the wilderness can be and how every breath can feel different and invigorating once you get past your fears.”
She breathed harder at his words, his passion, and the thought of seeing the things she feared through new, braver eyes. Then reality set in.
“What if I can’t get past my fears?” She’d been trying not to think about it all afternoon, and she was careful to hold back the question she really wanted to ask. Will you stop being interested in me?
“Then at least you’ve tried. There’s no shame in not being able to get past your fears, Callie. You’re willing to face them, and that’s all that matters. Fear drives me to push myself further, because if I don’t try to overcome it, I might miss out on the best things in life and never even realize it.” His eyes grew serious. “Holy shit.” He let out a loud breath and looked away.
“What?”
“I was thinking of something my bookkeeper said to me before I left town.” He shook his head. “Clarissa Simmons, she’s been our bookkeeper for three years. Anyway, she said I might meet my soul mate out here.” His eyes searched Callie’s.
Soul mate. Yes, that’s exactly what you feel like. She liked Clarissa already.
“Huh.” Wes smiled. “Let’s get started so we can get to camp before dark.”
As they neared the tall, powerful horse, the memory of having no control over the other horse consumed Callie and stalled her thoughts.
Wes slipped his arm around her waist and stepped between her and the horse, which was behind the fence, but she was still glad for the barrier.
“I’m not going to let anything happen, Callie. I’ll be right there with you, but you have to keep your eyes open, and no startling your horse. Your heels are like gas pedals. If you dig them in, she will react. Okay?”
She managed a nod.
He glanced over his shoulder. “This is Trina. She’s a sweet, calm horse. It’s like she eats Valium instead of horse feed. Callie, you look like you’re ready to run away. If I didn’t think you could learn how to ride with complete control, I wouldn’t let you up on her. The other horse took off because you kicked her with your heels. You can control that.”
Callie inhaled a sharp breath. She clutched his forearms and drew strength from them. She tried to push past the fear that screamed Don’t climb on that horse! But the memory of the horse galloping and the fear it incited in her was too much. She felt her arms tremble and dropped her eyes to his chest. That was much better.
Concentrate on him, not the horse.
With his index finger, he lifted her chin. “Why don’t we just stand here a minute and get used to Trina.” He guided her to the fence, and the horse pressed her muzzle into his chest.
She wanted to bury her face in his chest.
He stroked the horse’s cheek and kissed her on the muzzle. “Hey there. Trina. You’ll take good care of my girl, won’t you?”
My girl. She pushed her fear a little farther away.
Wes took her hand and brought it to Trina’s cheek. He guided it down the firm muscles of her jaw. Callie could see only one of Trina’s eyes from where she stood. The horse looked enormous, but the way she looked at Callie, with inky lashes any woman would kill for and a kind gaze, brought Callie a step closer. Wes lowered his hand to the small of her back. She felt safe knowing he was there with her. Trina shifted her head toward Callie, and she stumbled backward.
“She wants to get closer to you. It’s okay. This is how horses connect with us.” He slipped his hands around Callie from behind. Trina’s nostrils flared as she sniffed Callie; then she lowered her head and pressed her muzzle just below Callie’s chin.
It felt like a hug. She didn’t know she could feel anything like that from a horse. She petted Trina. “Hi. She is sweet, isn’t she?”
“She is. She likes you.” Wes pressed his cheek to hers. “She feels what you feel. If you remember that, you’ll connect with her. If you’re fearful, she’ll be fearful. If you’re calm, she’ll be calm.”
She was trying to be calm, but his warm breath brushed against her neck, and she had no chance at being calm with that going on, or with his arms wrapped around her middle and his hips against her butt. Oh boy.
Callie turned around, hands pressed flat against his chest. Oh, that’s worse! “Wes, I’m not sure I can calm down with you teaching me to ride.”
He grinned, and his head fell back with a deep, sexy laugh that made her smile and feel a little silly.
“Well, then, we just might have a problem.” He kissed her forehead before she banged it against his chest.
“What am I going to do?” He was laughing, and she was so damn turned on that her nipples were hard. This was not good. She had to get past this crazy desire to tear his clothes off so she could function like a normal woman. Serious. Be serious. She looked up at him and—damn it—between his playful smile and the desire in his eyes, she was a goner.
“I can’t do it.” She took a step back and regretfully peeled her hands from his chest. He took a step forward and she held her palms out. “No. Stay there. Just…stay there. And if you could somehow become uglier, that would be good.”
He arched a brow.
She ran her eyes down his godlike body. “Ugh. And can you maybe get fat or something?” She spun around and looked at the horse.
“Cal.”
She heard him take a step toward her, felt heat radiating from him. “No. Stop. Don’t come closer. I can’t be calm with you near me. Can’t you have someone else teach me?”
His hands found her hips, and she closed her eyes. His stubbly jaw pressed against her cheek, and she breathed him in.
Okay, forget it. Just stay right here forever. I don’t need to ride the darn horse.
“I can get someone else to teach you,” he whispered.
She heard regret in his voice, cushioned by a thin layer of understanding. She should be adult enough to deal with this, and as much as the rush of new feelings excited her, this particular issue made her feel weak. She might be shy, but Callie didn’t like feeling weak. This wasn’t fear that was holding her back; it was lust. She could handle lust.
Couldn’t she?
Damn it. She had to be able to.
She faced him again, and the feel of him against her drew a disastrously wanton groan from her lungs.
No I definitely cannot do this.
Wes laughed again and brush
ed away the hair that had fallen into her eyes.
“Let me get Butch.”
“No. This is stupid. I should be able to calm down. Do you really think the horse will feel a difference?”
He looked at Trina. Callie swore the darn horse was smiling.
“I think it’s more about you than the horse. You need to be comfortable and confident when you climb on her. If you can’t focus, and you startle or kick her in the ribs, she probably won’t run like the other horse did, but she’d definitely pick up her pace.”
“Okay. You know what? This is stupid. I can totally handle this.” I think. I hope. She pushed away from him again and drew her shoulders back. “I can do this. I don’t need Butch.” She glanced over her shoulder at Wes. “I need you. I just need to get my own…thoughts”—desires, lust—“under control. I can do this.” With determination, she concentrated on the horse.
“You sure?”
“More than sure.” I think. “Just don’t look at me like you want to kiss me.”
He arched a brow again.
She rolled her eyes. “Come on, or it’ll be dark by the time I get up on that horse.”
After a few embarrassing minutes, Callie made it up onto the saddle. Wes stood sentinel beside her, and surprisingly, Callie felt confident. The round pen was too small for the horse to take off at full speed—or at least she hoped it was. She reminded herself not to dig her heels into the horse’s ribs and to hold the reins loosely.
She could do this. She refused to be the girl who needed a chaperone on a horse forever. So what if she was in the library club throughout elementary school, and while her friends were taking horseback riding lessons she was making lists of her favorite authors and pretending she was Snow White or Cinderella? That didn’t mean she couldn’t learn to ride. Even if it wasn’t her favorite thing to do and it wasn’t as safe as books and reading chairs or walking in a park on solid ground. It was something Wes loved, and for him, for them, she could do this.
“Are you ready? I’m going to walk with you. Remember to handle the reins gently. When you want her to turn, you need to guide her, give her the clues she needs. Your body is the steering wheel. Tighten the leg on the side you want her to veer toward, lean slightly that way with your head and shoulder, and loosen the reins on that side.”
Fated for Love Page 12