by Tara Brown
“Oh.” That made sense. He and Sissy would need to be protected. It dawned on me I hadn’t given much thought to the fact they would be there. I assumed of course Mom would get them out. My plate was too full.
I got up and hurried to the kitchen where she was icing a carrot cake. “Jack said to tell you it’s done and a go. So you can warn Dad.”
“Right. Okay.” She smiled and motioned at the cake. “Want a piece with some tea?”
“Before dinner?” I narrowed my gaze. Something was up.
“It’s two in the afternoon, darling. I don't think you’ll spoil anything.” She rolled her eyes at me, but I still didn't trust it. “Also, this came for you.” She slid a flash drive with a weird end at me. It resembled the charger for my phone.
Guessing, I plugged it into my phone as she served me cake and poured us both a cup of tea.
My phone went dark.
It flashed three times with bright white light.
Then it went dark again.
Just as I was about to put it down, the phone rang.
"Hello?" I answered cautiously.
"How far would you go to kill the Russian? I need to know," Servario asked after a moment of silence. "Be sure, Evie. How far would you take this? What if it means the end of you?"
"All the way," I tried to sound certain but hearing his voice was killing me. “If he finds out who I am, he will come for my kids. I have to end him. And in order to be certain he’s dead, I have to kill him. I will do anything to stop him, for good.”
The line went dead and a message in white writing popped up on the screen.
Dear Evie,
S asked me to pass this along.
Said you would find it enlightening.
Cheers,
Elise
I grimaced but read the other part of the message, the part I desperately wanted.
“What is it?” Mom asked as she took a bite.
“The exact location of a house in Volgograd where Michele Saransk is hiding out. Also shows a meeting point with a time for today.”
“Darling, isn’t it a bit much going after him while we’re planning the takedown of the Burrow?”
“Mom.” I leaned in, hoping she could get a sense of my sincerity. “Imagine Jules being taken and forced into one of those places.” It made me shudder just saying it. “They’re little kids. I want him dead. I have the skills and the means to do it; I owe it to those kids to save them. That’s why we joined the military. To make a difference.”
“Evie—”
“There’s a chance he might already know who I am and be the one who gutted our house in Canada,” I confessed my real reason.
“Okay then, he has to die. But I want to be sure you’re ready for this level of commitment. Saransk won’t be an easy mark. I think this is one of those times where you have to ask yourself if the juice is worth the squeeze.” Her eyes flashed something, worry maybe. “I don't know if you understand the danger—”
“I understand and I already know how far I would take this. I would do anything to kill him and end his reign over the human trafficking and threat to my children. Anything. Die if I have to.”
“Okay then. When do we leave?” She sounded saddened by it, not her normal excited to kill everything that moved.
“An hour.” I scowled at her. “How long have you had this?” Was she hiding it from me?
“It came this morning.” She shrugged. “I’ll get my knives and get dressed. Meet you at the car in half an hour.” She took a second huge bite of cake and walked away, leaving the rest of her piece.
For a second I was alone with the thought that Mom was protecting me again, before Luce came strolling in.
“Oh, carrot cake. My fave.” Luce slid up next to me and started eating Mom's piece.
“Wanna go kill our Russian douche bag?”
“Do I ever. I didn't realize we’d have him so soon. We calling Coop to help?”
“No. Jack will be in the ear. Me, you, and Mom are meeting Elise in an hour in London. You know Coop won’t approve. He doesn't trust Elise.”
“Should we?”
“Not a clue,” I answered honestly. “But it’s an all-female death squad which is kinda cool,” I offered with a bit of a shrug.
“That might be worth the risk of her betraying us and us ending up dying in the Gulag.”
“Exactly. And Fitz will be here with the kids and backup if we need an emergency evacuation because Elise betrayed us the way we’re both sort of assuming she will.”
“No S?” She gulped.
“No, I doubt there will be an S. He gave Elise the contact info for me, and she was the one who sent me the proposal.” I left out the weird phone call. I didn't need to bring any of my emotion into this.
“He’s agreed to let you go into Russia alone?”
“I don't know. He gave Elise my number, that’s all I know.”
“Man, whatever you did to get that arms dealer’s panties in a knot, it was bad.”
“I think we both know what I did.” I tilted my head to the side.
“Oh that.” She pressed her lips together and nodded. “Yeah, that would do it. I guess I didn't think you and Coop were still a problem for each other.”
“We’re not.” I changed the subject, “I doubt we’re bringing guns. This is a silent mission. Knives. Daggers. Fake jewelry.” I took one more big bite and got up from my chair. “Meet in half an hour at the car.”
“Roger that,” she said with a mouthful of cake.
I hurried to kiss the kids and tell them lies, more lies, and ask Fitz to keep them safe. His eyes almost rolled into the back of his head when I gave him the “if I die” spiel, but it made me feel better.
By the time we met back at the car, my stomach was doing that thing where I was nervous but also excited. Excited to kill the one person I’d been daydreaming about for months. It was something I would be revisiting with a therapist later, I knew that. But I was also doing the YOLO thing Luce always said.
I could tell by the glint in Mom’s eyes she was all sorts of excited. Nerves of steel, that one. And a sick penchant for murdering bad people. Possibly any people. I didn't want answers to that so I didn't dig too deep.
Ernesto got the car doors for us, offering a little wink at me as we climbed in. “Ladies.”
“The airfield please, Ernesto.”
“Of course.” He nodded and climbed in.
I rolled down the window and held my hands outside, enjoying the last few minutes of warm summer air. I wasn't sure what to expect in Russia, but it always appeared cold in movies and pictures.
“Testing,” Jack said softly in my earpiece.
“Yeah,” I muttered.
“Me too,” Luce added.
“Me three.” Mom beamed at me.
“All right, ladies, you’re going to be on your own on this one. I didn't even betray you and give Coop a hint. And S is not responding. We’re all still cool with that, right?” Jack sounded nervous. He was rambling a bit. “’Cause there is no shame in not—”
I cut him off, “We’re good.”
“Okay.” He didn't sound good, but I couldn't bother worrying about him.
When Ernesto parked the car next to the helicopter with Judy in it, he gave us all a warm smile. “Enjoy the trip, ladies.”
“Yes, London shopping should be a blast,” I lied.
Mom laughed, offering nothing to cover for the weird wicked-witch cackle.
When we reached the chopper, Judy didn't speak. We climbed in and buckled up, Mom up front with her.
She flew in the silence I had started to dread.
Luce gave me a side-glance and lifted an eyebrow, motioning her head at Judy’s back.
I shrugged. There really was no other answer. Judy was obviously a whore face who thought she was better than everyone else. I knew the type. I'd done PTA.
When Judy landed at London Heliport by the Crowne Plaza, she didn't say goodbye. We climbed out and r
an over to where Elise stood outside a second chopper at a different landing pad, and Judy took off.
“Not even a wave?” Luce asked, watching her fly away.
“She hates us.”
“Elise, darling. How are you?” My mom hurried to Elise and gave her a warm hug. Elise closed her eyes and smiled, as if they were old friends meeting at the mall, not assassins hooking up for a blood fest.
“Helena, you look wonderful.”
“You flatter,” Mom gushed and hugged again. “But it’s you who looks wonderful. You must be relieved to be away from the other mission.”
“Relieved isn’t the right word.” Elise laughed.
“I bet. Anyway, let's get on with it.”
“Sounds good.” Elise climbed into the pilot’s seat. She could fly. Of course she could.
I climbed into the back and pretended I was fine with being so near to her.
“Hello, Evie, Luce. Nice to see you both.”
We waved, neither of us speaking. Not that there was much point. The chopper got loud enough that we wouldn't have heard each other without a headset.
We flew for an hour to a countryside airfield where a private jet I recognized was waiting. The view of it sitting there with a door open and the boarding stairs next to it made my entire body tighten. Luce gazed over, again giving me a side-stare loaded with discomfort.
I pressed my lips together and prayed to the gods he wasn't there. I desperately didn’t want to own up to the fact I was the one who ruined everything. It had been so much easier being the jilted as opposed to the jilter.
Stringing two men along who knew about each other was disgusting; cheating on the one I’d allegedly chosen was much worse. My actions and betrayal of him made me hate myself.
Elise landed the helicopter, not giving me a hint or a look to suggest what I would find on board.
I shuddered with anticipation of what he would do to me, do in front of me. Servario was a cruel man. Maybe not as cruel as I was, but cruel enough that I dreaded every single step until I got to the jet.
It wasn't like the old days; no one greeted us when we boarded. No Foxy Roxy or smell of French onion soup or fresh baguette.
But there was a newspaper and a drink set in one of the seats.
My stomach landed with a thud, threatening me with IBS or possibly a heart attack, and my mouth had gone completely dry as Elise waved at us from the back of the plane, the place that had once been a bedroom. A bedroom for me.
“Let’s go get ready. The flight isn’t as long as you would think. Gustavo said about four and a half hours.”
She called him Gustavo.
My already battered heart flaked off a little once more, turning to dust and blowing out the door.
Exhaling slowly, I forced my feet to move to the back of the plane.
“This is my favorite part of flying Air Servario,” Luce exclaimed and hurried past me. I peered back and noticed my mom turned toward the cockpit.
I forced myself to keep moving until I reached the new salon that had replaced the bedroom.
“We’re going to be Indian belly dancers,” Elise exclaimed as if she was excited about the chance to be in this disguise.
“We’re white?” I scowled, holding back comments on cultural appropriation.
“Yes. But we won’t be for long.” She lifted a couple of bottles of something with labels written in Spanish. “This stuff is insanely fast acting. It was made for the CIA. Why don't you go first, Evie?” She started shaking the bottle. “Strip down and stand over there on the towel by the shower curtain I’ve hung up.”
"Naked?" My voice cracked.
"As a baby."
"Great." Obliging but also never having felt more self-conscious, I pulled off my clothes to stand completely naked in the shower curtain surround she had created for this moment.
I cursed things like mommy-tummy and saggy mom-boobs as she got close, spraying the cool mist on me. Fortunately, my eyes had to be closed, so I didn't get to watch her gaze travel my body, making comparisons to her own. A body that had never born a child, let alone two. A body that hadn’t rested for a decade, eating salt-water taffy until it became a no-go food for her. Who knew you could eat too much salt water taffy?
“Okay, you’re done. You can do me now.”
I opened my eyes to see naked Elise, appearing exactly as I had imagined and holding the bottle for me. She was taut and firm, but soft and plump in the right places. A little extra on the hips and breasts, creating supple curves.
“Spritz it gently, just misting me. Do one layer and let it set for a minute. Then do a second coat. Don't worry about hair or creases.” She laughed and held her arms and legs out just as I had. She said hair and creases like she had them but she didn't.
I wasn't certain, but I wondered if some of this wasn't payback. Servario’s idea of tormenting me just a little more.
I spritzed slower than she had, trying not pay too much attention to the way her pert nipples rested on her perfect globes or the way her hips curved so delicately. Her scars were different from mine, all mission and not mothering, and definitely they had cooler storylines than mine. I’d seen her deep cover, pick sores and needle marks. She was a beast. A badass spy, for sure. She went all in, letting her body become nothing more than a tool. She was ten times the spy I was with all my hemorrhoid stories and morning rituals.
Realizing there was no way I could ever compete with her, I decided halfway through spraying her perfectly waxed vagina that she was not my competition. Not only was she far superior a woman, but also I was not going to be that lady. The one who disliked another woman because of a man. We were sisters in this. Partners. Allies. A team.
And yes, she and her obviously beautiful vagina held something of a place in Servario’s heart, but that didn't mean she and I had to be on opposite teams. He wasn't the prize at the end of this journey.
He wasn't a prize.
He was a human and I was better than that.
I kept forgetting who I was. Forgetting my moral code. Or my morals altogether. I blamed my vagina. Tricky ho.
The cold reality was that this journey had one prize.
Being alive.
There really was nothing beyond survival.
And even if I didn't survive, my integrity and class would.
Because I had ended things with Servario.
He was free to do whatever he wanted, with whomever he wanted.
Same went for Coop.
Grinning and bearing it, I sprayed her tight little butt and made something close to peace with who she was to him. Okay, it wasn't peace. But it was closer, close-ish.
“I’m done.”
“Okay, you’re for sure dry. So you get dressed, yours is costume number one. The bag to the far left. I’ll do you now, Luce.” Elise popped open an eye and held her hand out for the bottle.
It was weird but I could watch her darken. Her skin becoming a beautiful and smooth color that suited her bright eyes and perfect lips.
“Whoa.” Luce gave me the up-down. “You look awesome. It’s almost a tragedy you weren’t born this way. You’re totally way hotter with dark skin, my friend.” Backhanded compliments were something she and Jack shared.
“Thanks?” I scowled and walked a bit bowlegged to the bag, thanks to the hair and creases I did have. I unzipped to find a stunning teal belly dancer outfit.
“Oh my.” Mom came into the room, giving my naked body a strange stare. “Not what I expected. Let me help you.” She grabbed the top and undid it for me. I let her put it on, trying not to feel weird about all this. I continued to remind myself it was not, by far not, the weirdest thing I’d done on one of Servario’s planes.
When I stepped into the pants, I almost sighed with relief.
Mom did me up and clipped on all the jewelry for me.
I was covered by the time she was done.
Belly necklaces with chimes and finger rings that clapped. Necklaces that sparkled in the lights
. And shoes that made my feet look small but were actually quite comfortable.
She placed the finishing touch, a crown made of what appeared to be rubies, onto my dark hair. “Gorgeous.” She stepped back.
I sat in the chair next, letting Elise do my makeup. “I’ve been practicing this for the last twenty-four hours straight almost. Napping and going back to it. I think I have it.” She spoke close to my face, leaning in and drawing something on my eyes. Her breath smelled of strawberries, because of course it did.
When she was done spritzing me with makeup sealer, I opened my eyes. She stepped back and nodded. I rose and turned, gasping when I saw myself. I didn't recognize me. Not even a little.
“Oh my God.”
“Right?” Mom leaned in, shaking her head in disbelief. “This is incredible. Well done, Elise.”
“Thanks.” She turned to Luce. “You’re next.”
“I’ll get out of your way.” I excused myself and left the room.
Servario stood in the aisle between the seats, facing me as I left the back room. His jaw dropped as I tinkled my way toward him.
Seeing the look on his face made me ache everywhere.
His eyes almost danced with dirty thoughts and his lips twitched as if he contemplated smirking at me, but he didn't.
He swallowed hard and sat down, not speaking to me.
It was much worse than him shouting or mocking.
I sat a seat over from him, next to the aisle.
“Has Elise discussed the plan?” he spoke softly, staring at the newspaper.
“No. She just said we would be belly dancers.”
“You, Elise, and Luce will have eye cams that link to Jack and record everything, in case we need it. Elise is going to run through a dance with you before we land. You and Luce will have a very simple role—”
“Dance?” I hadn’t thought about the belly dancer costumes in a practical application.
“Of course. You will be brought to the house by your mother. She’s will be the madam who runs you girls. Girls I trafficked. You will dance for the party and then—mingle.” His voice cracked on the last word.
“I guess that’s believable.” I accidentally let my inside thoughts slip outside.
“Right. When you mingle with the gentlemen, I can’t protect you. You can’t protect yourselves in a way that blows your cover. And whatever happens, do not blow the cover. You will bring an army down on us in a country where we can vanish without a trace.”