“Jéhenne! Jéhenne, wake up ... Please, Jéhenne!”
I paused for a moment as I realised it was a different voice and far from the mocking tone that had sent fury charging through my veins, this one was full of concern. I opened my eyes cautiously and found Corvus straddling me, holding my wrists down on the mattress.
“Thank the gods,” he breathed and let go of me. As he did so I could see the flesh on his hands was red raw and the mattress was sending plumes of smoke, coiling gently into the air.
I flung myself at him, holding on for dear life and sobbing, “I’m so sorry, Corvus, so sorry.”
I took his hands in mine to inspect the damage but of course, it had already gone.
He smiled at me gently and reached to tuck an errant strand of hair behind my ears.
“I wish more than anything that I could keep you safe, my heart. If I thought I could lock you in here and get away with it and nothing could hurt you, I would do it, but I do not know how to protect you from your dreams, Jéhenne.”
“They’re not dreams," I said wearily.
He nodded. “I know. Do ... Do you know who he is now?”
I shook my head. “No and I don’t want to ... He’s so powerful, Corvus, why me? Why on earth would he want me?”
I was trembling and Corvus gathered me to him, holding me tightly, as though he would hold on to me forever to keep me safe. “He is more powerful than me?”
I paused in my crying and took a breath, not wanting to answer the question but I looked up at him and met the fear in his expression ...and nodded.
He closed his eyes on the pain I could see was there and buried his face in my hair, holding me so close I could barely take a breath.
“Are you truly afraid of him?” he asked.
“Yes. Oh, God yes.”
He raised his head and put his hand under my chin until my eyes met his. “Hear me, Jéhenne. I will do whatever it takes, anything at all, to keep you safe. I swear to you on my life, he will never have you.”
I finally found the courage to voice the knowledge that had haunted me every waking minute since I had returned from the underworld, the knowledge I finally had to admit to him now I had accepted it myself.
“You can’t defeat him, Corvus, and neither can I.”
Corvus looked back at me and defiance shone, fiercely in his eyes. “I will, Jéhenne, I will find a way. Whatever it takes, he will never have you.”
I touched his face, looking at him with wonder. “You really would do anything for me, wouldn’t you?”
He smiled, his expression sad. “You already know the answer to that, my heart.”
"Yes." I sighed. "We will find a way, won't we? I mean ... I got away from him before or we would never have met."
I didn't need to look at him to see his expression, to know he was remembering just how that had ended for us and just how long he had waited for me to come back.
He kissed me instead and when he let me go he gave me a crooked smile. "I think Rodney is in the kitchen. I can hear him crashing about. You had best go and see him and reassure him everything is well between us."
I hesitated for a moment but in the end I had to ask. "Is it? Is everything alright between us?"
He looked at me for a long time, the blue eyes calm now. "Yes, Jéhenne, everything is fine between us. It is everyone else interfering that is the problem as always. Now go and spend the day with Rodney and leave me to get some sleep. I have had very little recently and I feel the lack of it."
"Must be getting old." I grinned at him, trying to joke and lighten the mood, and he did the same, rolling his eyes.
"I will see you tonight." He kissed me again to make sure I wished those hours would fly past quickly, and I left him to sleep.
Chapter 35
I made tea in the apartment kitchen before heading down stairs to the main kitchen on the ground floor. By the time I got there the enticing smell of bacon was drifting on the air and I scurried to the kitchen as fast as I could without spilling my tea.
“Mornin’, lovely, you’re just in time.” Rodney was occupied in piling a plate up with fried eggs and tomatoes, bacon, sausage and thick slices of buttered bread.
He put it down on the vast kitchen table and gestured for me to take a seat.
“Wow, Rodney, thanks, what’s all this in aid of?”
He turned back to the cooker but I could see he was smothering a grin.
“Oh, er, nuthin’ really, just thought you might need a good breakfast ... Keep yer strength up, like.”
I sighed, accepting the inevitable. “I suppose the whole bloody chateau knows by now?”
“The whole chateau? Nah.” He laughed. “Half of bleedin’ France knows by now.”
I groaned. “Oh bloody hell, Rodney.”
“Sorry luv, you can’t keep a secret round the vamps, thought you’d know that by now."
I sighed. "I suppose they all hate me?"
He shrugged. "Tell the truth you aint been flavour of the month the last week or so but I've set things straight. They know you didn’t do nothin', it was all a trick and you figured it out, like."
"Thanks, Rodney, for everything, I mean."
He shook his head. "Nah, luv, I should 'ave had more faith in yer. I should know by now- you'll do the right thing in the end."
I frowned and tried to figure out what he was on about. Every time I tried to remember what had happened between me and Corin things ...got fuzzy. "What do you mean the right thing?"
He choked on his tea and swore. "Bleedin' 'ell, I forgot. Corin told me you wouldn't remember ... Er I mean ..."
"What do you mean?" I demanded. "Remember what? What has that bastard been saying now? He's not still here is he, he has gone back?"
He put out his hands to placate me. "Course, luv, course, bleedin 'ell, he's not stupid. He went back last night."
"Good!" I snapped. "And he'd bloody well better stay there." My head ached as I spoke and I felt guilt wash over me at my harsh words but couldn't figure out for the life of me what I had to feel guilty about. He was lucky he was still breathing. I looked up at Rodney who was looking unhappy.
"What?"
"Nuthin', luv."
"What?"
He shrugged. "Can't tell yet, I promised but ..."
"But?"
"But ... Corin, he's not as bad as you think. He's ... He's alright."
I looked at him in astonishment and he shook his head. "Let's leave it at that, Jéhenne, change the subject will yer?"
"Fine." I was more than happy to do just that. Talking about Corin made me feel ...uncomfortable. "What do you want to talk about?"
I stuffed a slice of bacon in my mouth and chewed contentedly and Rodney pulled up the chair opposite, his eyes drifting down to the tattoo at my neck and he chuckled. I started on the sausages, shaking my head at him. “Stop it.”
“Stop what?”
“Looking so bloody pleased, it’s embarrassing.”
He shrugged. “I am pleased, for both of you. ‘Bout bleedin’’ time you worked things out. Please the gods, may we all have some peace now."
I paused and looked at my plate as his words hung between us. I had no intention of pleasing the gods anytime soon. Before I could sink myself in gloom I heard a flapping noise behind me and Nerva flew into the kitchen, landing on the chair beside me. I ruffled the feathers on the back of his neck and he bobbed up and down happily. “Hey, Nerva.” I cut the rind off of the bacon and handed it to him. He took it delicately from between my fingers and then flew off to eat it.
Rodney chuckled and gestured to my neck again. “Amelia’s gonna be green when she sees that by the way.
I traced my collar bone self-consciously. “It is lovely, isn’t it?”
He nodded. “Beautiful.”
I bit my lip and figured I had better be brave and find out when I should expect the latest round of crap to shower down on my life. “Have you seen Cain?”
“Yeah, I told him, you kn
ow, 'bout everything."
"What did he say?"
"You know Cain. He just looked at me. I could 'ave just told him it was rainin' out for all the reaction I got but he went off to see Remé early this mornin’. Don't reckon he'll be back for a while.”
I felt a ridiculous amount of relief at the thought of having a few hours reprieve before I had to face what he was going to tell me. “I was thinking I might take the day off, no training, no spells, no stress ..." I had remembered this morning that Christmas was coming soon. With everything else that had been going on it just hadn't seemed important but now ... Now I was going to try my hardest to make it a happy time for all of us.
"I want to do some Christmas shopping, do you fancy coming?” I asked. I needed to get away, to try and find something normal to do, at least for a little while, even if I was just pretending.
He laughed. “Why not? Does a body good to play hooky, now an’ then. You get that down yer neck asap an I’ll go fetch the car.”
I held up my mug with a grin and he chinked his against it. “Deal!”
Ten minutes later and fighting indigestion, I was standing outside the Chateau, looking at Rodney's shiny new car. It was an M class BMW and had been a present from Corvus ... An apology.
"An apology for what, Rodney?"
Rodney shrugged and looked at the car with distaste. "Me an' his Lordship ... We 'ad words."
"You mean after he threw me out? You stood up for me and he was angry with you?" I guessed.
I watched as he kicked at the gravel with his DM's, looking awkward. "Not exactly but ..."
"But?"
"Me own, bleedin' fault, I ... I kind of forgot who I was dealin' wiv, tried to talk to him and ... Well he weren't in no mood to be talked to, put it that way. Anyway he lost his temper and ..." He cleared his throat and his face paled at the memory. "Well, I thought I'd breathed me last, frankly. Anyway couple of days ago this turned up wiv my name on, from him."
I walked over to Rodney and gave him a hug and he looked up in surprise.
"What's that for?"
"An apology for being such a pain in the arse. I'm so sorry you got dragged into it."
He snorted and shook his head. "Never mind that, luv, you can bleedin' well apologise for the fact I've got to drive this flamin' thing!"
I raised my eyebrows and he gestured to it and then to himself. "It's bad enough I'm having to live in a new body when I'd just got the old one how I liked it, now I've got a new bleedin' car an all!" he complained. "There were plenty of good years left in me old un."
I bit my lip and stifled a laugh. Rodney's car had been a heap of junk but then my own car was more rust than metal. I had also refused Corvus’ offer of a new one, so I did sympathise but I had to admit, the new one was lovely.
"So you don't like it then?"
“Dunno, I mean, it’s really pretty an’ all but I’m scared to leave it anywhere in case it gets scratched or somethin’ an ... Oh I dunno, it’s just a bit ...flash, like. Not that I aint grateful though, an I could ‘ardly say no to ‘im could I?”
“Bet Amelia likes it.”
He snorted. “You aint winnin’ no prizes for that one, luv.”
I chuckled and we got in. Rodney drove us out of the village and on our way to Perigueux.
As we wound our way through valleys and along forest roads, the sun glinted on the frost-covered land and sparkled on the swollen rivers that raced beside us, rushing over rocks and sometimes bursting their banks to create new lakes in fields and gardens. I sat back against the leather seats and tried to relax, tried to be happy.
It was a beautiful day and I was out with a good friend knowing I would be with Corvus again tonight. That thought made my stomach do a little flip and I smiled to myself. I had him back. For now that was all that mattered. We would face together anything that was coming and may God, or the gods or whoever the hell I was supposed to believe in try and take that away. I would fight them with everything I had.
I tried once more to wrangle my thoughts away from stressful subjects and instead wracked my brain to think of what to buy everyone for Christmas. I had zero money so I was going to have to be inventive. Corvus of course had given me a credit card ages ago and told me to spend what I liked whenever I wanted but I couldn’t do it. He thought I was being ridiculous as he was obviously loaded.
He was used to supporting his family so he said one more made very little difference and what I was likely to cost him in a year probably wouldn’t cover what Cyd spent on shoes in a month. Having seen Cyd’s vast shoe collection and fetish for Jimmy Choo’s I could well believe it but it didn’t make me feel better. Inés had also offered to support me but that was even worse, I would never put myself in a position where I owed her anything ... you just never knew how she’d demand payback.
The idea of getting a job however, in the current circumstances ... Yeah, well that wasn't happening any time soon. I felt my stress levels begin to rise once more and quickly put an end to that train of thought. I was going to enjoy today if it killed me.
We parked up under the Plane trees opposite the Musée de Perigord and headed into the old town.
Rodney wound a tartan scarf round his neck and hugged his leather jacket tighter. “Blimey, luv, it’s brass monkeys out here.”
I looked at him in surprise; ghouls don’t usually notice the cold.
“You can feel that?”
He nodded. “Yeah, actually I’m glad I’ve got you on yer own. I’ve been wantin’ to talk to you. It’s just, since I’ve had this new body I’ve been noticing a few, well ...odd things.” He looked embarrassed.
“Oh?” I wondered what the hell he was going to say and if I could get away with changing the subject. Then I remembered some of the awkward conversations I’d inflicted on Rodney since I met him. He’d borne all of them stoically, because he was my friend. I couldn’t do anything less could I? Man up, Jéhenne. “Well then, like what?”
“Well, it’s just a bit ...lively.”
I raised my eyebrows. “Lively?”
He nodded. “Jéhenne, I can feel ...things, things I never felt before.”
“Oh!”
“Nah, I don’t mean like that, though now you come to mention it ...”
“Too much information!” I yelled hastily. Even friends had boundaries, right?
“Oh, right yeah. Well it’s just, I can feel hot an’ cold, me hair’s growin’ again, I’ve had to start shaving which is a bleedin’ nuisance, and I don’t seem to need Inés potion any more either, an’ I want to eat ...weird stuff.”
“Like what?”
“Like weird stuff, tomatoes an’ salad an’ broccoli ... Bleedin’ broccoli! I didn’t even like that before I died!”
We strolled down the narrow cobbled streets and I paused for a moment in front of one of the chocolate shops. Like a lot of the chocolatieres around here, it was faery owned. I peered through the glass to see a pretty pink-cheeked woman wrapping a fancy box of truffles. She saw me looking and smiled, before returning to her work.
“Well, that doesn’t seem too strange.”
“Nah, not for a friggin’ vegetarian maybe but I’m a ghoul, luv. I’m supposed to be a carnivore an’ to be honest, well, I’ve gone right off it.” He shoved his hands in his pockets and shivered.
“Come in ‘ere will you, I’m bloody freezin’.”
He pulled me into a pretty gift shop and sighed as the warm air hit us. The owner smiled and said, “Bonjour,” as we took a tour of the shop.
I picked up a gorgeous little jewelry box which I thought Amelia might like, and then put it hastily back down when I noticed the price.
“So do you think it’s to do with your new body?” I whispered, so the man behind the counter couldn’t hear us.
“Yeah, I do. I did some checking and it turns out Johnny Blonde was a vegetarian.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. The thing is, luv, he wasn’t technically dead when I took over. I mean
his brain was but his body weren’t and I can’t help thinkin’, well ... that he’s in ‘ere with me, like.”
I looked at Rodney in shock and could see he was as freaked out as I was.
“That’s ...really weird.”
“You’re telling me! I mean it aint like any of it’s bad ...not really. In fact some of it’s amazin’ but it’s just, well, you know ghouls are the lowest of the low as far as the supernatural community go.”
“Not in the family though, Rodney, not with Corvus.”
“Nah, I know that, luv, but the thing is, if it gets out I’ll be a bleedin’ laughin’ stock. I mean ‘ave you heard the like, a vegetarian ghoul ... Seriously, luv?”
I stifled a laugh.
“There see!” he hissed as we ducked out of sight of the shop keeper who was starting to give us funny looks.
“I’m sorry, Rodney, but I think you’re worrying about nothing. I mean, like you said, the changes are all good on the whole and I mean ...look at you.”
“What?”
“Rodney, you’re bloody gorgeous!”
He blushed a deep scarlet and rearranged his scarf.
“Oh, come on ... You can’t tell me you didn’t know,” I said.
He shrugged. “I dunno. I had me last body a long time, you know, I was used to it. Now I got a new car an’ a new bleedin’ face to match. I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore.”
We’d reached the corner of the shop which was filled floor to ceiling with teddy bears and seeing him looking so gloomy up against all the stuffed animals made me feel sad for the loss of the old Rodney. It had been my fault after all and sometimes being pretty caused as many problems as it solved. It was something I had experienced myself. I walked up and put my arms around him and gave him a hug.
“I’m so sorry.”
He hugged me back and I gave him a peck on the cheek. “S’alright, lovely, I’m just feelin’ sorry for meself.” He let me go before picking up one of the teddy bears. “Think I’ll get this for Amelia,” he mumbled before heading off to pay for it.
The Heart of Arima. Page 28