by Mariah Stone
“I can give you all of that. I will protect you. Not that you need much protection. I will give you more riches than you can imagine. And you know no one will love you and our son more than I.”
Mia’s soul was being torn apart. “I know.” She took her hands from his. He tried to hold them longer but then let go. Mia took one step back, and an abyss spread between them.
“But love is not everything. I have just gained independence. I need to figure out my life…our life”—she put her hand on her bump and felt a reassuring kick—“on my own.”
Hakon inhaled raggedly, as if he could not get enough oxygen. Without glancing at the Norn, he stretched out his hand. “Send me back. Now. Before I begin to beg her or take her with me by force.”
Mia glanced at the Norn. Her face wore the same amused, curious expression, a half smile on her lips, as if Mia’s and Hakon’s lives had not just ended.
“Interesting choice, Mia,” the Norn said. “As you wish, Hakon.”
She put the spindle in his hand.
Mia reached out, as though to stop him, as the image of him began evaporating like steam. Her whole body hurt as though a thousand hammers were hitting her. Their eyes were locked, and even though she had just ended their happiness, his eyes were full of tenderness, connected with hers.
“I love you,” he said soundlessly.
And then he was gone.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
Denver, October 18, 2019
MIA WOBBLED SLIGHTLY on the sunlit driveway to the front door of her house, bags of groceries in her arms. It was a cold October afternoon, and her breath rushed out in quick streams of steam.
The Rocky Mountains were gorgeous on the far side of the horizon, tall and white and dreamy. The sight of them made her heart stop every time she looked at them, reminding her of other mountains, the ones where she had been truly happy for the first time in her life.
Mia turned away and unlocked the door.
She had lived in the house for about six weeks now, and the smell of old furniture still hung in the air. She had rented it furnished, and it was obvious that before her no one had been living there for years. It was also obvious that the previous tenants had been old.
She set the groceries on the kitchen counter and paused for a second, leaning with her hands against the countertop, her chin on her chest. She studied her bump, which had grown round and cute at the end of her second trimester. She remembered Hakon caressing it and referring to the baby as his. As always when something reminded her of Hakon, the pain and heartache rushed over her like a tsunami, choking her, deafening her, blinding her with a blackness that was ready to swallow everything.
She forced herself to breathe in and out, counting to four. Little by little, the darkness let her go, and she could look around, taking in the normality. The old, chipped brown kitchen, the fridge that always smelled no matter how well she cleaned it, the yellow lace curtains on the window.
Was this better than the warmth of the hearth in Hakon’s mead hall? The smell of freshly cooked stew? The humming of the women as they spun wool and weaved sails? Hakon’s strong arms around her, his heartbeat against her palm, his rich, low voice saying that he loved her?
Mia shook her head, tears burning her eyes.
No. No need to regret anything. She had chosen this. She had known she would need to lie low, take on a new life under a fake name—ironically for the second time in her life, but this time forever. She had known she would need to give up love. She had known she would never be a happy woman in this life. No man could make her happy except Hakon.
When Hakon had disappeared back to his time, the Norn had said Carl would not notice her, so she needed to go now if she wanted to escape. Mia hadn’t waited another moment. She had rushed to her old apartment where she had the money and the fake ID she had prepared when she’d wanted to escape Dan in June.
She hadn’t taken a flight, afraid she would leave too many traces. She’d bought a used car in the suburbs of Boston and just taken off, her mind blank, her nerves numb, her fingers shaking.
She had just begun a residency program at the University of Colorado, and the job was a welcome, blissful tornado of activity that sucked all her thoughts, energy, and attention away from the raw, pulsing, throbbing wound in her chest.
Mia let out a long breath, wiped her tears away and straightened up. She was hungry, as always since her second trimester had started. She needed to cook something to keep her baby healthy.
Fish tacos today. She’d eat them alone, just like every dinner for the past two months, with the TV on to keep her company. The joys of modern life.
You chose it, she reminded herself as she stabbed the plastic wrapping of the frozen cod. You wanted to take control of your life. So there you go. This is your life. Enjoy.
You could have gone with him, another part of her said. He wanted you. He came for you through time, risking everything.
Everything.
And she had rejected him. She had stayed, and he had not tried to control her. He had respected her decision even if it hurt him deeply.
Mia removed the fish from the wrapping, the frozen fillets burning her fingers, and put it on the plate to defrost in the microwave.
Hakon loved her too much to put her in another cage.
Not that she would have let him.
He would rather be unhappy for his whole life than force her to be with him. And she wanted to be with him so much…
But it was impossible. She had made her choice. She was doing it for her baby.
It had been confirmed at her last ultrasound—she was having a boy. She imagined the life they would have. Mia, tired, forcing a smile, focusing on her son as if he were the only joy in her life. She would be half human, half ragged wound. She wanted the best life for him.
But would seeing his mother like that be the best for him? Growing up and learning that life was about sacrifice. That safety was the most important thing.
Was it, though?
Mia had thought she was taking control of her life. But it wasn’t control, was it?
It was misery.
Mia held her breath as an idea struck her.
Why did she assume that it was either one or the other?
Hope lit her fingers and toes up like little firecrackers and sent sparks up her arms and legs.
No, don’t hope yet. Maybe it won’t work.
But if it didn’t work, she’d find another way.
She picked up her car keys and a bag of peeled baby carrots and headed for the door, abandoning the fish in the microwave.
Her breath catching in her throat, she whispered, “I’m coming, Hakon.”
OF COURSE the Norn wasn’t in the cafeteria of UCHealth.
Desperation crept through Mia as she realized the Norn would not make it too easy for her. She had rejected one chance to go back in time. There may not be another.
One heart-wrenching week passed, and Mia was nowhere near finding the Norn.
Then, one evening, Mia opened the door to her car and almost fell to the ground when she saw someone in the passenger seat. Mia jumped, clasping her hands to her chest.
“Oh my god!” she yelled as she settled in the driver’s seat, glaring at the Norn. “I’m pregnant for pity’s sake. Couldn’t you have just waited next to the car?”
The Norn laughed. It was a bit strange to see a being who determined the destinies of gods and men laugh. Mia didn’t know if that happened often, but the laugh was sweet, a little bit girlish, pure, and full of joy. The old lady almost snorted.
“Ah, humans.” The Norn wiped one eye and pressed out a couple of last giggles. “You are adorable. Anyways, you were looking for me. I thought I’d save you some time, given your”—she looked pointedly at Mia’s bump—“situation. What do you have in mind?”
Mia exhaled. She had prepared for a negotiation, but now she had been taken completely off guard, and she needed a moment to remember what she wanted to say. But
her thoughts scattered like beads off a broken necklace string.
“Ehm,” Mia said. “I want to go back to Hakon.”
“Do you now? Came to your senses, didn’t you?”
“I did. Can you send me back?”
“Your tapestry certainly shines when you are together. You bring out the best in each other. I enjoy your story.”
Mia smiled, and one huge part of the rock on her chest lifted off. But not all.
“Well,” Mia said. “The thing is, it’s not about just me anymore, is it?” She gently put her hand on her bump. “If I go back, I don’t leave a choice for my baby. I’m making the decision for him. And I don’t think it’s fair.”
“Parents move cities, countries all the time.”
“It’s not exactly like that. Cities and countries still have more or less the same medical development, well, compared to medieval times anyways. Vaccinations, antibiotics, and hospitals are pretty much available. I am taking him not just through space but through time.”
The Norn’s eyes burned with curiosity, and she leaned forward. “So, you have a proposal for me, do you not?”
Mia swallowed hard. What would she do if the Norn said no to her request?
“Yes, I do have a proposal. I want to be able to go back and forth through time. Grant me a multiple-entry visa, if you please.”
The Norn’s eyes widened in surprise and indignation. “What?” she demanded.
Mia put her hands in front of herself protectively. “Only in case of emergencies! If my son gets sick with the plague or something.”
The Norn crossed her arms over her chest. “You and him?”
“Yes. Only life and death situations, so that I can save his life.”
“All right. Only once.”
“Five times.”
“Three.”
“And one time for Hakon.”
The Norn frowned. “Not for you?”
“No. I’ll be fine. I need to protect my men.”
“All right. Four times.”
Mia nodded, then let out a long breath. The Norn studied her with a hint of amusement on her lips. “That is not all, is it?”
“No.” Mia clasped her hands on the wheel and stared at them, then met the Norn’s ancient eyes. “I don’t want to rob my son of his choice. He was conceived here, but I am taking him back in time without asking him if he wants his future to be there. So, when he’s eighteen, I want him to be able to decide if he wants to stay with us back in the Viking Age or go to the twenty-first century and live here.”
The Norn raised her eyebrows. “I determine destinies. Don’t you think I already know what he will decide?”
Mia raised her chin. “Did you know that I would not go with Hakon? And that I would then change my mind?”
The Norn smiled and only lifted her shoulder.
When she didn’t say anything, Mia said, “No. I don’t think that you know. I don’t want to believe that everything is determined the day someone is born, like Norsemen believe. I think I am the one controlling my destiny.”
The Norn shrugged. “Well, that is not completely true, is it? If it was so, you would never have traveled back in time and you would never have met Hakon. You would have still been in Dan’s hands.”
Mia frowned. “I suppose you’re right. But I was the one who decided to grab the spindle.”
“So, what will I have in return for allowing your son to have a choice and for you to travel in time four times?”
Mia gestured with her hands. “What would you like?”
“Hmmm.” The Norn tapped on her lips with her index finger. “I would like you to sacrifice a goat at the rune stone in my honor every evening and to dance naked in the sacred grove every morning.”
Mia’s jaw dropped. “What?”
The Norn guffawed, clasping her thigh with one hand, snorting. “Just kidding, as you say these days. Look at your face!”
Mia exhaled and pretended to wipe sweat from her forehead. “Phew. You are on fire with jokes today, aren’t you?”
The Norn let out a long, satisfied “Ahhh,” then met Mia’s eyes. “Sweetheart. The destinies of men and gods are often tragic. Hopeless. They never learn. I’m like a teacher. I have my favorites in the class. And you are one of them. You deserve happiness. So does Hakon. So does your child. I will agree to your terms if you agree to one of mine.”
Mia’s eyes blurred from tears. “Of course. What is it?”
The Norn leaned forward and squeezed Mia’s hand. “Do not waste one moment of your life. Make every single one count. Do not let the gifts that I am giving you now go to waste. If you ever come to a similar choice, be sure you know what is right. Because I will not give you another chance.”
Mia nodded enthusiastically, tears falling down her cheeks. “Don’t you worry. I won’t. I’m ready and packed. Please, send me back to my man.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
L omdalen, Norway, October 25, 875 AD
HAKON STRETCHED his hand out to the fire in the hearth, and its warmth touched his palm. The mead hall was silent, as if the very house held its breath. Half of the village must have gathered around the hearth tonight. Children, men, women, thralls, and servants. Solveig listened to him with a solemn face.
“What happened then, Jarl?” said Ledis, pulling at his fur cloak from where she sat on his lap.
Hakon blinked at her. Eight-year-old Ledis had been so afraid of him previously that she had dropped a basket of parsnips at the sight of him. It had been the day of the solstice. The day he had met Mia. The memory of Mia, the way he missed her, gripped his lungs, making it hard to breathe. This had been happening ever since he had come back. How was she? How was the babe? Hakon hoped she was happy and safe and that she was the healer she had wanted to be.
He exhaled a breath through his clenched throat, hoping he could breathe out the pain. Futile, of course.
Mia was always with him. She was part of him—his body, his soul, his everything.
“And then the Norn pulled out the golden spindle,” Hakon said.
His people gasped, leaning closer. It was probably the tenth time he was telling them the story, and they still gasped every time he told it. One corner of Hakon’s mouth curled up. Ever since he had come back, everything had changed. It was as if he had found himself in a new village. The scared glances, the silence towards him, the suppressed anger and fear of him, were gone.
That had started to change after Mia had given him that remedy against the curse. But everything had changed completely when he returned from the future. People appreciated and respected how he had dealt with King Nyr.
But they loved that he had gone through time into the future for Mia. They all loved Mia, even though she had assumed a different name. But she had saved many lives, and people did not forget that.
Finally, when Hakon had told them the whole truth—about Mia being a time traveler, the Norn who had sent her, and that Hakon himself had seen the Norn and talked to her—people had realized he could not have been cursed.
He was blessed. He was favored by the Norn herself.
He had seen the golden spindle.
He had touched it.
He had traveled through time and brought them knowledge of the future.
Ever since then, he had repeated the story of his journey at least twice a week, and every time more and more people came to listen.
“And how did it look?” Ledis asked.
“It was of pure gold, and there were carvings of the gods. I saw Fenrir, the giant wolf, and Yggdrasil, the world tree, and Odin and Freya. It was the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.”
Except Mia.
People murmured, looked around, nodded, their eyes wide.
“And then?” Ledis said.
“And then—” his voice broke. “Mia said she wanted to stay in her time.”
“I was a fool,” Mia’s voice said, and Hakon’s heart burst from pain as if a thousand spears pierced it. He must be
missing her so much he was starting to imagine things.
But he looked up in the direction of the voice, wondering who had spoken. And he stopped living for a moment. Because in the darkness of the hall, by the entrance gates, was a woman with a round belly. Hakon felt as if Thor himself had just struck him with Mjölnir. He could not see her face in the darkness, just the shape of her. Was she a spirit?
What seemed like an eternity later, when Hakon could think again, he put Ledis gently on her mother’s lap and stood up, squinting, trying to see.
“Come closer, woman!” someone said. “He can’t see you.”
She moved forward, the orange light of the fire coloring her simple white apron dress. Hakon took in every movement—the gait, the way the skirts moved around her legs—were so painfully familiar. He could not allow himself to hope. She was wobbling a little bit now, her belly heavier and rounder.
And then when she was close enough for the fire to illuminate her face, he could no longer deny the truth.
“Mia,” he rasped. It was all he could manage.
She smiled. “I was an idiot. I belong where you are.”
Hakon could not move. His feet were like rocks. People were looking at him. Then he felt someone tugging at the side of his trousers, and he looked down.
“Go,” Ledis said. “She came back, do you not see?”
Hakon nodded. “I see.”
He walked to Mia. People gave way to him when he stepped over the bench, and then as he walked past those who were standing behind it. Everyone was watching.
When he was standing right in front of her, his heart was banging against his ribcage like a ram.
“What does this mean, Mia?” he said. “Why are you here? Don’t tell me you came just for one day. I won’t survive if you leave me again.”
She had never been as beautiful as she was now. She glowed from within, her radiance brighter than the light of the fire. He was hers. Enthralled by her. Belonging to her. At her mercy.