by Sarah Pond
Jasmine was functioning at a minimum. She kept herself busy at work, and was mostly in her office with the door closed. She worked late nearly every night. One evening, Jason tapped on her door. He asked if he could sit down, and Jasmine nodded. He sat down on the sofa, looking at Jasmine. 'Jasmine, I'm really worried about you.You've become withdrawn, you're working way too much. I think you should take some time off.'
Jasmine sighed, and looked up, 'I'm fine, just busy.'
Jason hated seeing her like this. He also knew that she was fiercely independent, and liked to sort things out for herself. 'Look, if you need anything, or you want to talk, you know where I am.'
Jasmine looked up at Jason, and just about managed a smile, 'Thank you,' she said.
Later that evening, Jasmine was back at home and had the radio on whilst she was preparing some food. 'Just The Way You Are' came on, and it reminded Jasmine of her first date with Olivia. The tears started to flow, and Jasmine didn't think that she could bear it.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Olivia found that she and Liam slipped into an easy friendship again. They knew each other well, and would finish each others' sentences. They often went out with Emma and Matt, who couldn't work out why they didn't get together. One evening, returning from the cinema, it was getting quite late. As it was the weekend, Liam asked if he could sleep on the sofa. Emma said that was fine, of course. Matt and Emma went off to their room, leaving Liam and Olivia in the lounge. Liam took Olivia's hand, saying 'I've really enjoyed these few weeks with you. You know I want to be with you again,' and he pulled Olivia close and kissed her.
Olivia kissed him back, and it suddenly felt so familiar, so comfortable. Olivia looked up at him, he really hadn't changed much in six years, he still had that boyish look. She took his hand, and led him to the bedroom. They began kissing again, and started to undress. Liam couldn't quite believe this was happening, and he held Olivia's head, kissing her deeply. They fell onto the bed, a tangle of arms and legs. Liam ran his hands down Olivia's body, down her thighs, touching her between her legs. Olivia took in the familiar scent that was Liam, clean and slightly musky. She ran her hands over his shoulders, down his chest. It had been such a long time, and Liam was very ready. He reached over for his jeans, and pulled a condom out of the pocket. Tearing open the wrapper, he pulled it out and rolled it on. He was back on top of Olivia, kissing her. He said, 'You're sure?'
Olivia nodded, and Liam entered her, groaning with pleasure, 'I've wanted you for so long.'
He kissed her, and moved rhythmically, building up momentum. He could feel his imminent climax, and groaned as he came. Olivia could feel him inside her, throbbing. Liam kissed her, her mouth, her face, her shoulders. Liam pulled out of Olivia, and discarded the condom, and lay beside her. 'You didn't come,' he said, 'We'll have to do something about that,' and slid his hand down her body.
'No,' she looked at him, 'Not with your hand, with your mouth.'
Liam looked at Olivia, she had never asked for that before. He slid down the bed, and Olivia parted her legs. Liam was hesitant at first, then started finding his way. It seemed to take a long time, but eventually Olivia came, and they cuddled up together on the bed.
In the morning, Olivia woke up with Liam looking at her. He smiled at her, and went to kiss her. Olivia pulled back. She knew that last night had been a big mistake. Oh shit, not another one of these conversations. What on earth am I doing. Liam looked at her, 'I know what you're going to say. I can see it in your eyes. Look, it's fine. You've changed, our lives are different now. We can still be friends, though, right?'
Olivia looked into Liam's blue eyes, 'Liam, you are the sweetest guy. There was a part of me that thought it might work, and I wanted it to. But it just isn't the same now. I'm really sorry.'
They hugged, and Liam breathed in the smell of Olivia, knowing that he had to finally move on now.
Over drinks, a couple of weeks later, Liam and Olivia were out with Emma and Matt. Liam said, 'I've decided to go back to Cornwall after this contract finishes. It's been fun, but I find the pace a bit too fast for my liking, so I'm searching out opportunities nearer to home.'
Emma said, 'We'll miss you, it's been great having you around.'
Emma wasn't surprised, though. Olivia had told her what had happened, and how she felt that she had had closure with Liam. No doubt, he felt it too, he needed to get on with his life now. Also, it was clear that he wasn't suited to London life, whereas Olivia thrived on it.
Jasmine was still operating in numbness mode. She was pretty sure that Olivia was back together with Liam now. Her friends were getting worried about her, as she couldn't seem to snap out of it. Usually nothing would phase her, and they had never seen her like this before. One evening, she was at Phoebe and Fran's place. 'This is crazy. You're a beautiful, professional woman. You can't carry on like this. It doesn't help that Olivia is still working with you, that you have to see her every day.'
Jasmine replied, 'I want her there. She's really good at her job, by far the best person that we had. But I knew I wanted her the moment I saw her, which was not professional of me in the slightest. I've never felt like this about anyone, or come undone like this. I feel stupid.'
Fran said, 'It's okay, you fell in love, and you fell hard. Don't beat yourself up about it, but you have got to pull yourself together. I think you should take some time off, like Jason suggested. You could go on holiday,' Fran looked concerned.
Jasmine looked at them both, sighing, 'Yes, I know that you're right. Starting from now, I will make a real effort.'
Phoebe said, 'Actually, we're thinking about having a dinner party soon, and there's someone that we think you'll get on well with.'
Shaking her head, Jasmine said, 'No, no way. I don't want to be set up. Anyway, I'm nowhere near ready to meet someone else at the moment.'
Phoebe said, 'Okay, but will you come to the party?'
Jasmine looked at her, sighed and nodded. She was coming to terms with the fact that Olivia was with Liam, and she would have to think about moving forward.
Phoebe and Fran were Jasmine's closest friends, and they were being great whilst Jasmine was trying to get over Olivia. They had met at an art exhibition in Hampstead when Jasmine was nineteen. At that time, the two of them were friends, and not yet a couple. They had all got on so well together, and started to socialise, going to events and the theatre. When, a year later, she came out to her parents, Jasmine really appreciated their support. Jasmine had had a middle class upbringing, and her father was strict and quite distant with her. He believed that young ladies should behave in a certain way, and Jasmine knew that that wasn't quite her. Her mother, on the other hand, had a more bohemian spirit, and was much younger than her father. Sometimes, Jasmine wondered how they had ended up together. At first, Jasmine had found her father's disapproval of her lifestyle very difficult, but over time, and with the support of Phoebe and Fran, and her mother, she decided that that was his problem, not hers. Over time, Jasmine watched Phoebe and Fran fall in love. In fact, she knew it before they did.
Jasmine decided to take everyone's advice, and took a week off of work. She didn't want to go away at the moment, she really didn't feel like it. She spent a lot of the time at home, and it was helpful not to see Olivia every day.
When she was back at work, Laura noticed that Jasmine seemed to be a bit more like her old self, the week away had obviously done her some good. She had no idea what had been going on, as she didn't talk about her personal life. At least she seemed better, which was the main thing. One morning, Laura and Olivia were chatting, and Jasmine walked out of her office. Olivia looked up, saying, 'I was just telling Laura that Liam has decided to go back to Cornwall after his contract finishes. He doesn't really get on with London. The good thing is, he gave it a try, so he won't be wondering whether he was missing something.'
Jasmine looked at Olivia, in that way she had, and said softly, 'I think he knew exactly what he was missing.'
She turned and walked back into her office, leaving the words hanging in the air. Laura noticed a look of sadness on Olivia's face, then she turned her head away, and carried on with her work.
Emma had been trying to get Olivia to go out with her and a few friends from work. 'Come on, you've been moping around recently. You're not with Liam now, so why not?'
'Okay, okay, Friday night it is,' said Olivia, laughing.
The girls got home from work on Friday about six, had something to eat, and started getting ready for their night out. They tried on some different outfits, asking each other's opinions. In the end, they plumped for skinny jeans with a loose strappy top. Olivia's was cream, and Emma wore a sapphire blue top which looked stunning on her, and complimented her eyes.
They arrived at the bar, and Emma introduced Olivia to everyone, including a guy called Will. They seemed like a nice bunch of people, and Olivia was starting to relax and enjoy herself. Bars and clubs weren't really her thing, but now and again she didn't mind. Emma liked to party every weekend if she could. There were a few of the group on the dance floor, then gradually they went off to get some more drinks. Soon Olivia realised that it was just her and Will still dancing, but what the hell, she was actually starting to have a good time, for the first time in ages. Will started dancing closer, and when the music changed to a slower song, he held her hips as they moved to the music. She put her arms around his neck, and looked into his eyes. He was very handsome, and as she could see he was going to kiss her, she knew that she wasn't going to stop him. He was very gentle, and smelt delicious, clean and salty, as if he'd just walked off of the beach. They danced and kissed. Emma, watching from the bar, was thrilled, she had been trying to get Olivia and Will together for a while.
Will and Olivia had been dating for a few weeks. Olivia really enjoyed spending time with him, and now he often made up a foursome with Emma and Matt. Olivia watched Emma and Matt falling in love with each other, although she wasn't sure if they knew it themselves yet. Olivia had had a taste of that with Liam, but there wasn't that same connection there. She and Liam had grown up from teenagers to adults together, and she really cared about him. What she had experienced with Jasmine was something different altogether. They had things in common, they liked being around one another, not necessarily doing anything in particular. Not to mention the phenomenal sex. Olivia had no idea it could feel like that. But she was straight, so how could it work between them. At least, things were much easier at work now, particularly after Jasmine had taken some time off. She and Jasmine kept things very professional. It was different to before, they didn't all go out socially like they had done. Jasmine usually said that she had arrangements, or had to work late, and eventually Laura stopped trying to organise anything. Olivia still babysat Laura's children, and she and Laura regularly had lunch together. One lunchtime, Laura happened to say, 'I'm so glad that Jasmine is more like her old self. I don't know what was going on before, but she seems better now. I think she must have been stressed from over working. It's hard to know, she's such a private person.'
After an evening out together, Will asked Olivia back to his place. Olivia knew what he had in mind, and they had been dating for a while now. Will had taken Olivia's coat, and hung it up. He bent down to kiss her, and she put her arms around his neck and kissed him back. They drew apart, and he took her hand, and led her to his bedroom. He kissed her neck, and started to undo her top. Removing it, he then undid her bra, letting it fall to the floor. He touched her breasts, and leaned in to kiss her, whispering in her ear, 'You are so beautiful.'
She started to unbutton Will's shirt, revealing his chest. Um, he had a very nice chest. They took off the rest of their clothes, and climbed onto the bed. Will lay down, and Olivia stroked his body. They kissed, becoming more and more passionate. Will reached across to the bedside cabinet to get a condom. They kissed again, then Olivia sat astride Will, and he ran his fingers down her body, over her breasts and between her legs. Olivia lowered herself onto Will, feeling him inside her. They kissed passionately, and Olivia started moving back and forth, building a rhythm, and building towards a climax. Will came first, with Olivia close behind. As their heartbeats slowed down, Olivia rolled off of Will, and lay beside him. Will said, 'You are amazing, that felt so good,' and he kissed Olivia.
Olivia lay there, thinking that Will was such a great guy, gentle, handsome and sweet. And thinking that she had never felt the way she had done when she was with Jasmine.
Now that she had had some time off of work, Jasmine found that plowing herself back into work seemed to be the answer. She just found that work wasn't as much fun as it used to be, and she felt that a part of her was missing. Jasmine knew that Olivia was now seeing a guy called Will, so that was that. She was starting to go out occasionally, usually because Phoebe and Fran practically forced her to. She knew that feeling this way was crazy, that she was responsible for her own happiness, not Olivia, or anyone else for that matter. But that was as it was for the time being. At least she was making an effort now, and things were beginning to get easier.
Today was Olivia's birthday, and it was a fresh spring morning. Emma had made her a birthday breakfast, and a home made birthday crown to wear, which she had made out of silver card. Olivia laughed, saying, 'Thank you, this is lovely. I really do feel like a birthday princess.'
When Olivia got to work, there were cards on her desk from Laura, Jason and Jasmine. Jasmine was out at a meeting all morning today. The card from Jasmine read, 'Wishing you a wonderful birthday, With love, Jasmine.' There was also a box wrapped in exquisite paper, with a beautiful ribbon on it. There was no gift tag to say who it was from. Olivia began unwrapping the box carefully, then opened it. She took out a vase. It was the vase that she had seen at the National Gallery, the one of The Fighting Temeraire. Oh Jasmine.
Jasmine came back from her meeting after lunch. 'Happy birthday, Olivia,' she said, and went into her office.
Olivia followed her in, and closed the door behind her. Jasmine looked up. 'Thank you so much for the vase, it's beautiful. And so thoughtful,' she paused. 'Look, I know it's been difficult. I just wanted to say...'
Jasmine interrupted Olivia, 'It's fine. There's nothing to say. Happy birthday.'
Olivia thought about trying to say something again, then thought better of it. She missed how easy things used to be between them. 'Thank you, really,' she said, and left Jasmine's office. Olivia sat at her desk, and a feeling of great sadness swept over her.
That evening, Will was going to pick up Olivia from work, and they were meeting Emma and Matt at their favourite Mexican restaurant. They ordered a pitcher of margaritas, and they all toasted Olivia, wishing her a happy birthday. They had a wonderful evening, although Emma thought that Olivia was quieter than usual, she seemed much more subdued than she had been at breakfast that morning. By the end of the evening, Olivia was a bit tipsy. They headed home, and Will and Emma managed to get Olivia into her pyjamas, and into bed. The next morning, Olivia woke up feeling a bit fragile. She rang Laura to say that she would be a bit late into work, but would work through lunch. Whilst she was laying in bed, she gave herself some time to think about things. Since finishing things with Jasmine, she hadn't really given herself any time. Firstly, she had thrown herself into helping Liam get started in London, and now she was with Will. Olivia did enjoying being with Will. He was good company, although they didn't have much in common. Olivia loved to go to art galleries and discuss books, neither of which interested Will. Still, it was good to have different interests, she told herself. She really wanted things to work with Will. They were so right together in many ways, and she really cared for him. It's just that ever since her birthday, when Jasmine had given her the vase, something had been worrying away at the back of Olivia's mind. She began to face up to the reality that she was in love with Jasmine.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Over the next couple of weeks, Emma noticed that Olivia hadn't really been herself since her birt
hday. Will had also seen that she had seemed more withdrawn. When they were in bed together, she didn't seem as into it as she had been that first time. It was good, but Will sensed that Olivia was holding herself back. One evening, Will had walked Olivia back home, and she was making them drinks in the kitchen. Watching Olivia, Will walked over to her, and put his arms around her. He said, 'I can't help noticing how distracted you've been recently. You've been getting more and more distant. I don't know what's going on, but I have a suspicion that you are in love with someone else.'
Olivia looked up at him, shocked. 'What?'
'I don't know, but I've grown up with three sisters, and had my share of girlfriends. It's just a feeling I get.'
A tear ran down Olivia's cheek, and Will wiped it away with his thumb. 'But you're so perfect in so many ways, and I really care about you.'
Holding her to him, Will said, 'I really care about you, too, but this will never work if you're in love with someone else. I just hope this guy knows how lucky he is,' and he kissed the top of her head.
Emma came into the kitchen to make a drink. 'Where's Will?' she asked.
'He left,' replied Olivia.
Emma looked across to see that Olivia had been crying. She went over and gave Olivia a hug. 'Come on, let's sit down and talk about it.' They sat down on the sofa, and Olivia told Emma what had happened.
'Oh, that's such a shame, you and Will were great together. Still, if it's not meant to be. So, are you still in love with Liam?'
Olivia shook her head. She wasn't ready to say anymore yet, she had to figure out some stuff for herself first. Emma hugged her, saying that Olivia could talk to her about it any time.