I take a deep breath, attempting to calm my annoyed self, before pulling open the door to the coffee shop. I love these girls. They are my family and I would do anything for any of them. I don’t want my shitty morning to spill into my afternoon girl time.
Cam and Vivian are already at our table when I’ve finally composed myself enough to enter. “Hello, my chicas,” I say, as I plop myself down in my usual chair. Cam has since changed from the photo shoot and looks comfortable in her tattered jeans, sneakers, and Van Morrison T-shirt. Her hair is still wet and piled high in a ponytail. This was her typical attire in college, but now she reserves her cozy clothes for casual days with us. Most other times, she looks like something out of a 1950s pinup magazine. When she sees me, she gives me a slight wave and a tight smile. Yup, she is approaching with caution.
Vivian, on the other hand, is absolute perfection. Two years ago after her husband Will died, I couldn’t say the same thing about her, but now her life is one which most would be jealous of. She married Brooks and moved into his colossal cabin. Their kids have blended together like the fucking Brady Bunch, and now she’s pregnant. I guess that’s what a St. Lucia honeymoon will do for you; I’m glad neither is in my future.
Her smile is big and bright, and her greeting is even warmer. She stands when I reach the table and pulls me into her famous momma bear hug. I pat her back and move to my seat as quickly as possible to order a caramel macchiato. If I were in a better mood, she would have gotten a slap on the ass, like usual.
“Okay, what’s wrong?” Viv asks, noticing my less than enthusiastic greeting. “I never get a pitiful tap on the back from you, girly,” she adds as she sits back down.
I immediately pick up the menu from the center of the table and nonchalantly flip through it. “What?” I ask casually. “I’m good, just a rough morning dealing with immature musicians, in the rain no less.” I slide my eyes over the menu to peer at Campbell across the table. “I don’t know where you find these assholes, but really, Cam, it’s time to swim in a bigger, better pond.”
“Oh whatever, Jen. If that shoot had lasted any longer, you probably would have taken one of them home,” she jokes.
“Bite your tongue, woman!” I sneer. “The only one who even seemed halfway decent was their guitarist and he proved himself to be a grade-A fucktard.”
The waitress makes her way to the table just as my expletive spills out of my mouth. She places Cam’s coffee and Vivian’s tea on the table and looks to me disapprovingly for my order. Yes, ma’am, I’m a potty mouth; we’ve been coming here for months and my language is just as inappropriate on each occasion. I’m not sure why she thinks her scolding expression will change that now.
“Caramel macchiato, please,” I tell her, smiling sweetly which only earns me a headshake as she walks away.
“Ohhhh, tell me more about this guitarist. Details, girls.” Viv moves to the edge of her chair and leans in on the table. “Hot? Muscles? Tattoos…”
“Asshole,” I simply say, cutting off her inquisition.
She looks to Campbell to elaborate, and Cam immediately accommodates, providing a play-by-play of my hideous morning. Vivian listens intently while I sit back and sip the coffee the waitress delivers. When she finally finishes her story, I look to Vivian to begin the musician bashing, but instead I’m met with wide eyes.
“Jen likes a boy, Jen likes a boy!” she shouts, clapping her hands. The outburst causes me to choke on my coffee and burn my tongue. Campbell just nods and smiles.
“I’m sorry, where the fuck did that come from? Did you not hear the story? He was a dick to me.”
“Oh, I heard the story,” she answers, wiggling her eyebrows. “I heard how you bickered with a tall, hot, tatted guitar player all morning. You usually put them in their place and move on, but here you sit, still steaming over your encounter. So, once again, Jen likes a boy, Jen likes a boy,” she sings.
“I’m not fucking twelve, Viv. Get over it.”
“I’m not going to disagree,” Campbell interjects, laughing at my pure mortification. “I have to ask though, what in the hell is gonasyphaherpilaids?”
Both of my friends look to me for the definition of my new favorite word for assholes who can’t keep it in their pants. “Think of the wide spectrum of venereal diseases; now mesh them all together and you have the king hybrid of all the major ones…gona…sypha…herpa…aids. There are just some guys you look at and know, their rotten dicks will give me a buffet of issues which require prescription medication. I like my vajayjay; I try not to anger her.”
They are rolling with laughter by the end of my explanation, provoking the attention of nearby patrons and more nasty looks from our waitress. Her twenty-five percent is slowly finding its way back into my pocket…lighten up, lady.
“I certainly don’t mean to change the subject because I love any opportunity possible to poke fun at Jen’s love life, but has anyone heard from Carly? She should be here by now,” Campbell asks, wiping the tears from her eyes.
We all check our phones to make sure we hadn’t missed a text or call from her, but we all come up empty. I look back to the front door of the coffee shop when I hear the bell, which hangs from the door, chime. There stands Carly, soaked through, swollen red eyes, and no little Olivia tagging along behind like usual.
“She’s here, girls,” I say, directing everyone’s attention to the entrance. Immediately Vivian stands up to rush toward her, also noticing her distraught state. Carly puts a hand in the air and shakes her head to stop her and then slowly makes her way across the coffee shop to our table. Vivian takes the cue, and sits back down, watching her like a hawk until she, too, takes her seat with us.
Carly is our shy, carefree, loveable corner piece to our little friend puzzle. She is fiercely loyal and wants everyone to get along; to see her so upset, something has definitely turned her world upside down. She would never let us see her this way, and absolutely not in public.
“Honey, what happened?” Cam asks, handing her a napkin to dry herself off. “Where is Olivia?”
“She’s with Jack. I told him I was meeting you girls after our doctor’s appointment this morning.” Her answer is barely audible and her eyes are down, burning a hole into the table top.
“This morning? Sweetie, it’s late afternoon. What have you been doing all day if your appointment was this morning?” I ask, as I reach over and place my hand on hers which, are laced in her lap. Vivian takes note and begins to rub her back.
“Walking,” she whispers, still refusing to look up at us.
I glance around the table at the others and we all make eye contact, I can feel the concern radiate from them. She has been walking around Denver all day in the rain, alone. “Are you hurt, what happened?” I ask again. I try to be compassionate and not too gruff with her, but my own worry level is spiking.
She finally looks up at me, tears spilling over her lids and down her frozen cheeks. “We can’t have any more children,” she answers. Her lips tremble from both the cold as well as the pain the words are inflicting on her.
“What do you mean, hun?” Cam asks handing her another napkin. “You had Olivia with no problems, what’s changed?”
Accepting the napkin, Carly dabs her cheeks and eyes before taking a deep breath to gather a reply. “The doctor called it secondary infertility. I guess it’s more common than you would think. Jack and I have been trying for almost a year to get pregnant again, and nothing. There can be lots of reasons for it and we can try lots of things fertility-wise to get pregnant.”
“So there you go,” I say, squeezing her hand. “There are still options, it just might be a little more difficult than the first time.”
She shakes her head and looks down at the table again. “No,” she sighs. “Jack told me after the appointment that he doesn’t want to try anything. He’s done, and wants us to move on with our lives. Content with how things are.”
“What?” I shout. “That is fucked up of him. If he
wanted to be ball-less, all he had to do is ask. I’d gladly fuck up his area, one short and curly at a time.” Vivian gives me her best stern mother look to get me to settle down. Cam looks around the coffee shop and begins to quietly apologize for my verbal diarrhea.
“I know, right. That is super fucked up,” Carly finally announces, just as loudly as my outburst. “I love him, but what an asshole!” she adds. Vivian gasps, Cam’s eyes bulge out of her head, and I can’t help but laugh. Carly does not cuss…at all. In fact, she hates when anyone around her uses foul language. She looks around the table at the wide array of reactions to her potty mouth slip-up and she too begins to laugh.
As upset as she is, I think a little of the weight of the situation has been lifted with our laughter. These women truly are my sisters. After walking away from my parents and their money, they are the only family I have, other than Aunt Maggie. It hurts me to see one of them hurt, and this situation only highlights that for me. As much as I like Brooks and Jack, if they ever betrayed my girls, I’d be the first one there with a shovel to help hide the body. If Campbell ever settled down and brought a man into our circle, I would offer her the same service. However, as much as I love them, and I know they love me, I’ve never felt confident enough to tell them the one thing I fear would change everything. Now, after hearing this from Carly, I know I have to bury my secret even further. I can’t risk losing them.
Casen
A few weeks have passed since the photo shoot at the park, and to say I’ve been patiently waiting on the call telling me the pictures were ready would be a huge lie. I have called to check in with Campbell every other day, hoping she would offer up the good news. I even wrangled Jen’s number from Campbell and texted her a few times to say I was sorry for being a dick. Not only did I want to talk to her again and actually apologize, but I was hoping she would tell me the pictures were ready to see.
This morning when Cam called and told me to gather the band and meet at Rock Bottom Brewery to discuss something important, I’ve never moved so quickly to get my ass somewhere before. I was almost thirty minutes early to the meeting when I arrived at the restaurant. I thought it would be a good idea to get there a little early and have a beer to calm my nerves.
I wasn’t expecting to see anyone here yet, so I was more than shocked to see Jen sitting at the bar, drinking a beer and laughing it up with the bartender. I can’t seem to make my feet move, instead I’m standing in the entrance, staring at her. The only word which comes to mind as I watch her free, uninhibited moment is divine…her laugh is intoxicating, her hair is shiny and gorgeous, and her tiny little body looks even smaller in the oversized barstool she’s sitting on. I suddenly wish it was me making her laugh like that.
I notice the bartender nod in my direction. His movement directs Jen’s attention my way, and instantly her mesmerizing smile fades. Great. Now I look like some creeper piece of shit. I nod in hello to her and make my way to the bar, taking the seat next to her.
“I didn’t realize you would be here,” I tell her as I signal to the bartender to bring me the same as what Jen’s drinking, a Corona with a lime.
Jen looks away from me, refusing to make sociable eye contact. “I’m not sure why I’m here, actually,” she replies before taking a swig of her beer. “I sent the photos to Campbell over a week ago. There really is no reason she should need me here, and she wouldn’t tell me over the phone what she wanted. That never bodes well when it comes to Cam.”
I’m surprised she’s willing to talk to me, even if she refuses to look at me. I take it as a good sign that her hostility toward me has tapered slightly. I want nothing more than to keep her talking so she’ll reveal those golden, honey eyes of hers. If I’m asking for things, I think I would prefer this was a two person meeting and the rest of the band would be no-shows. I can’t even explain why I’m drawn to the girl; she has been nothing but a thorn in my little toe from the moment I met her. For some reason though, I find myself intrigued by her.
“Hellllloooo? Seriously, Casen, do you have some attention disorder I should be made aware of in regard to speaking with you, or are you just that weird?” she asks.
Well, that’s fucking great. She’s caught me ogling over her again, and now I look like the team captain of the varsity douche patrol. On a positive note, at least I finally get to see those honey eyes.
“Um, sorry,” I tell her, shaking my head and focusing down on my beer. “I was just thinking I would go wherever Campbell told me, whenever she told me to do it. That girl has done more for this band in just a few months, than we’ve managed to do on our own in two years. I owe her a lot.”
“Yeah, well, Cam tends to hide things up her sleeve and then put you in a position to try and make you a better person. Usually her plans fuck up your whole day. I suspect nothing less from this little encounter she has planned for us today.”
“What’s so bad about being a good person?”
She swivels in her chair and squares her shoulders toward me, taking one final guzzle of her beer before sliding it to the bartender at the end of the bar. “Nothing is wrong with being a good person, if you already are one. It’s exhausting to pretend to be something you’re not, though. So, I prefer to remain the shell of a person I am, no matter how much Cam wants to change me.”
I’m not sure how to respond. I begin to gawk at her again, searching for the right words. Before I can get out any insightful response, I hear her laugh. She pats me on the arm like the dumbshit I’m acting like.
“Now you can forget about wanting me and move on to some band groupie who would be more than happy to fawn over your morally sound ass.” With that, she jumps off her chair and walks past me, waving to Campbell and the guys who have finally arrived.
I’m left in stunned silence. Instead of jumping up and joining the group right away, I hang back and watch them find a table and sit down. I need a minute to gather my bearings after our brief exchange. I can’t make heads or tails of what she told me, and I can’t decide how I feel about it. A part of me certainly wants to run and get as far away from her as possible. She will chew me up and spit me out, she knows it and I know it. Yet a bigger part of me wants to pursue her, find out more about this extremely complex woman. A woman who actually thinks there is nothing of heart and beauty inside of her. I want to prove to her how she’s wrong about herself. I want to make her see what Campbell sees, a beautiful person who is rough around the edges and tries to protect whatever has been damaged.
I feel their eyes on me, and sure enough, my bandmates, Jen, and Campbell are all watching me from across the restaurant area of the brewery. Everyone has taken a seat at a booth toward the back of the pub. Yet here I sit like a loser once again, daydreaming about a fucking girl who has done nothing except treat me like shit. Nonetheless, I can’t scratch the thought of her out of my head.
As soon as I notice them, I see Jen’s head dip behind a menu to shield herself from me. Campbell looks at me with a little concern and I try to deliver my best, ‘Dude, I’m cool’ look. That is until I see Royce mouth, “What the fuck?” It’s the nudge I need to peel my ass off the barstool and head to the meeting. I admit I’m acting completely out of character; they must all think I’m doped up on something herbal, or maybe I’m showing signs of a stroke. Fucking awesome. I need to get my shit together in the fifty paces it will take to get to the table.
“Fuck, dude, if you’re high, the polite thing to do is share with the group,” Royce chuckles when I finally arrive at the table.
“You’re an asshole,” I shoot back as he stands to let me into the booth. I slide in while they all take turns making some kind of joke and laugh about my odd behavior. Even Jen laughs, her menu bouncing with each giggle.
“Ha, ha, you guys are so damn hilarious. It’s been a long day, that’s all. I’m a little zoned out today.”
“Okay, boys, playtime’s over. I actually brought you here for a reason,” Campbell interjects, crossing her arms on the table and
mustering her best business expression. This must be a much more serious business conversation than we all thought.
Everyone sits up a little straighter and zeroes in on Campbell and her announcement…except Jen, who remains glued to her menu. My eyes slowly wander from Jen back to Campbell and back again, in an attempt to gauge both of them.
“After the photo shoot, I had flyers and demos made up to send out to media outlets. I plan on sending record labels the same promotional materials to garner more attention for you guys on this mini-tour coming up,” she begins. Of course, we all nod, as we knew that was the purpose of the shoot.
Campbell’s serious demeanor begins to crack and a devious smile slowly shines through. “Well, let’s just say, you have been well received,” she says before shifting back into serious Campbell mode.
“Jesus, Cam. Just spit it out already,” John sighs, his patience wearing.
“Sorry,” she says with a giggle. “Not only has Sony Records inquired about signing you guys for a record deal after the tour, but they want to have a media exposé featuring the band done as a way to roll out the publicity if you sign with them and begin recording under the label.” She holds her glass up in the air. “Congratulations, boys. You made it!” she squeals.
There is silence for a moment, as we let her words sink in. We sit with our mouths hanging wide open in complete shock. This announcement is the last thing I think any of us were expecting. For me, there are only two things I’ve ever wanted, a record deal and a family. Now that I may have one of those, my heart and mind can barely keep up with the emotions I’m feeling.
Lead Him Not Into Temptation (Redemption Book 2) Page 3