Penny and her father had both tried to get the truth out of Carla. But the woman wouldn’t budge.
“She still won’t talk. I would say just forget it. But knowing Carla, it could be a very bad situation waiting to blow up.”
“Yeah. Listen, how about you let me take you out to dinner, and I can run some thoughts I have been having about this by you? Maybe something can trigger your memory. And if that doesn’t work, I can always go back to Old Lady Henderson.”
“Old Lady Henderson? Oh, my, that woman had to be the nosiest person on the block. I couldn’t have you over without her telling Big Mama, ‘Penny’s fast behind had a boy in the house.’” Penny chuckled.
“Yeah, she might be crucial to finding out who beat Carla, especially if Carla continues to be difficult.”
“I’m game to do whatever I can to help.” She looked down at her casual light gray linen skirt, which hit just above her knees, and her short-sleeved pink silk shirt. “Should I change?”
He looked her over, his eyes stopping at her legs. “No. You look great.”
“Well, I’ll just go tell the folks I’m leaving and see if Gerald will stay with Carla until I come back.”
Penny walked back to the living room, and Jason followed her.
As soon as they walked in the room, Carla let out an exasperated sigh and rolled her eyes. “Aww, Brat! What’re you doing with him? You never listen to me!”
“He’s a nice man, Carla. She could do worse.”
Gerald nodded a greeting to Jason.
“Who asked you? Did anybody ask Gerald?” Carla looked around the room, pretending she was waiting for an answer to her question. “Nope, nobody asked you anything. Mind your business. I know what’s best for my daughter.”
If she wasn’t so annoyed at how rude Carla was being, Penny might have laughed. “I’m going out to dinner with Jason. Gerald, do you mind staying here with Carla until I get back? Make sure she gets some rest and make sure the person she won’t tell on doesn’t hurt her again?”
“I don’t need no babysitter. I just need to be left alone,” Carla huffed.
“Well, you got one, darling, so tough.” Gerald didn’t even look at Carla. He still seemed unfazed by her antics. “Go on and have a nice time. I’m not going anywhere. And I’m not going to let any more harm come to your mother.”
“Thanks, Gerald.” Penny sincerely believed the man would fight to the death to protect Carla. She couldn’t understand it, based on the way Carla behaved. But she reasoned it wasn’t for her to understand.
Riding in the SUV with Jason put her in a whole other state of confusion. She knew she was less deserving of kindness from Jason than her mother was from Gerald. Her lies had cost Jason his best friend. And even if she came clean now, it probably wouldn’t change anything. Still, she couldn’t seem to stay the heavy beating of her heart whenever he came around.
Making love to Jason Hightower had to have been the most idiotic thing she had ever done. Yet as she glanced at him driving his SUV in silent determination, she knew without a doubt that she would gladly make love to him again and again.
He kept his eyes on the road, but a slow and sexy smile crossed his lips. “What are you looking at?”
The stalled pitter-patter of her heart noted his smile, and was followed by a tightening of her nipples and a clench in her sex.
“I’m not looking at you.” She cleared her throat and turned to look out the window.
She took in all the changes that had happened in the city since she’d been gone. The entire stretch of Broadway, all the way up to Elmwood Park, was now Martin Luther King Jr. Way. She remembered when only a small section of the main street was named after the slain leader. Back in the day, they used to joke that only the worst part of Broadway was named after King. She wondered what the joke would be now. Did this mean that the entire city had gotten worse?
It didn’t seem as if Paterson was any the worse for wear, at least not to her eyes. So many new buildings had sprouted up, and many of the older ones were gone. But, oddly, it still felt like home.
“You were looking. I could feel it.”
“Well, you must be feeling things, then, ’cause I wasn’t.”
“Oh, I’m feeling things, all right. And I intend to feel a whole lot more by the time the night is over.”
She burst out laughing. “You’re still crazy.”
He laughed a little, too, and then his voice went sober. “Yeah, still crazy about you.”
By the sound of his voice, Penny could tell he wasn’t thrilled about having feelings for her. She couldn’t blame him.
They rode the rest of the way up Route 4, listening to the Quiet Storm radio programming and letting slow jam after slow jam speak all the emotions neither of them dared to voice.
The Italian restaurant he took her to in Paramus was small and quaint. It was a family-owned business, and it had a classy and intimate appeal. Everything, from the white tablecloths to the candles and the beautiful real floral arrangements on the tables, set the scene for a nice, quiet romantic evening. The smell of lilac, lilies and roses wafted through the air, along with the spicy aroma of tomatoes, garlic, onions and fresh herbs.
After eating their food in relative silence, Penny could no longer take it. If he was having second thoughts about what had happened between them the other night and he wanted a way out, she would give it to him.
When she opened her mouth to tell him he didn’t have to feel obligated to take her out and she understood if he wanted to backtrack, the words refused to come out. Instead, she inquired, “So, how was work?”
“Do you mean, have I come any closer to figuring out who attacked your mother?”
“No…well…I wasn’t talking about that. I was just making small talk.” She grinned. “But have you?”
“No, I haven’t. Tell me, do you remember any of Carla’s old boyfriends? Old Lady Henderson said she’d seen one of Carla’s old boyfriends around the house and she said she’d also seen him the day Big Mama passed. The description she gave seemed to fit your father. But she was adamant it wasn’t him. So do you remember anyone who might fit that description?”
Penny closed her eyes in thought. Carla really didn’t have a lot of boyfriends, per se. And for a lot of Penny’s life, Carla hadn’t been around. Right before she got hooked on the drugs really bad, Big Mama had kicked her out.
A flash of one of Carla’s boyfriends came to mind, and she automatically raised her hand to touch the tiny, now barely noticeable scar on the side of her right eye. She remembered the day she had gotten it.
The man who’d given it to her was the one boyfriend of Carla’s Penny wished she could forget.
She didn’t know his real name. But she could still clearly see his mean snarling face as he’d slapped her in front of Big Mama’s house and she’d hit the pavement. She had gotten a gash over her eye that needed five stitches to heal. She’d only been twelve years old at the time. And she’d had no idea what she had done that was so bad as to make a grown man strike her.
It was enough to make Big Mama tell Carla she couldn’t come around anymore if she was going to bring harm to a defenseless child.
Carla had chosen that man, C-Money, over her own daughter.
Jason watched her rubbing her scar and squinted. He remembered when she’d gotten it. He hadn’t been there at the time, but he’d seen the stitches afterward. He knew it had happened when one of Carla’s boyfriends hit Penny and knocked her to the ground.
He felt himself getting hot. Back then, he’d had his first instincts to kill, along with a desire to protect Penny so that no one ever hurt her like that again. It shocked him how prevalent those desires still were.
Penny looked up at him, and he found himself trapped in the bold, round copper pools of her eyes. “C-Money,” was all she said.
Jason vaguely remembered him, the drug dealer and pimp who’d gotten Carla strung-out on the crack. He’d only seen him a couple of times, and
he’d been a boy then. He remembered enough about the man to know he did indeed favor Gerald.
“Do you know his real name?”
“No, I don’t.” Penny was still rubbing her fingers lightly across her scar. “I’ve tried to block that scumbag from my memory.” She glanced at him and self-consciously removed her hand from her eye. She sighed.
He wanted to tell her that the little fraction of a scar did nothing to take away from her beauty. He wanted to tell her that he’d never let scum like C-Money get near her to hurt her again. He wanted to tell her he would always protect her. But he knew he couldn’t keep those kinds of promises to her anymore. She was about to go back to Los Angeles. And he wouldn’t be able to protect her when she left.
“Well, the nickname is something to go on, at least, and I think I’m going to go back down to the precinct and see if I can find out some more information. I don’t think your mother is going to talk. But if you think you can get her to talk, try. She doesn’t have to be afraid of him anymore.”
As much as it killed him to think he wouldn’t end the evening with Penny wrapped in his arms, he knew he had to make headway on this case. If C-Money were the attacker, he wouldn’t be allowed to hurt Penny again.
Carla hated stress. She never could handle it, and yet it always seemed to follow her around. She had no idea how C-Money knew to show up every single time she had seen Gerald. The jerk must have been watching her like a hawk. She hated feeling like the scared little mouse. The last thing she even wanted to think about was what he was going to do when he found out that Gerald was at the hospital and the house. He probably already knew.
Granted, she should have never started seeing C-Money in the first place. Her life had pretty much gone downhill from there.
That’s karma for you, Carla. Start screwing your man’s archenemy and the universe will start screwing you.
She needed a cigarette. Well, she needed more than that…but a stogie would help take down the edge a little, while she tried to think her way out of this mess.
Maybe Gerald would have one. Then he’d be good for something.
Carla rolled her eyes as she thought Gerald was good for a lot of things. That was the problem.
She got up from her bed, put on her robe and went downstairs. Her entire body ached, and she thought about taking one of those painkillers. The doctor said as long as she was careful she should be fine. Given the way her life was going, she didn’t want to risk it.
Truth be told, she still hadn’t come to grips with the fact that her mama was gone. And adding a daughter who couldn’t seem to stand her and two ex-boyfriends with serious issues to the mix made her a candidate for drug therapy, if ever there was one.
Gerald was sitting in the front room watching the news.
She cleared her throat. “Hey, you got a cigarette you can loan me?”
Gerald took out his pack of cigarettes and handed it to her. “Loan you? You gonna give it back after you done?”
“Ha, ha, ha, very funny.” Carla looked at the pack and turned up her nose. “Light? What kind of crap is this? Since when you started smoking lights? You might as well not even bother with these.”
“Beggars can’t be choosers,” Gerald offered wryly. “And I’m cutting back.”
“Mmm. Whatever. I guess this’ll have to do.” She took one out of the pack and sat down next to him on the sofa. “Dang, I need to go find an ashtray.”
Gerald placed his hand on her knee. “Sit back, relax. Just tell me where to look and I’ll go get you one.”
“There should be some clean ones in the back of the top kitchen cabinet, over the fridge. We haven’t used them in years. Mama didn’t allow smoking in the house after Daddy died.”
“Okay. I’ll be right back.”
Carla watched him exit the room and took a deep breath.
Jail had made the man finer, if that was possible. His tall, muscular frame did all kinds of things to her libido. And it didn’t help that she had the new memories of making love to him in his room to add to her old feelings. Plus, he was being so nice, so tender, so sweet, so understanding. So Gerald.
He came back and sat down beside her, placing the ashtray on the coffee table in front of them.
Carla put the cigarette in her mouth. And before she could reach for some matches, he lit it for her.
“Thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
“No. I mean thanks for everything. For staying at the hospital, and staying here with me and stuff. I do appreciate it, even if I don’t always act like it.”
He nodded and turned his attention back toward the television.
She took a long pull and exhaled. If she could just figure out how to get Penny to let her move to Los Angeles, Carla knew things would be fine. Fine, except she wouldn’t feel Gerald’s touch again. She crossed her legs and leaned back.
Gerald let out a deep sigh and turned off the television. He turned to her with an irritated expression on his face.
“What? What’s wrong with you?” Here she was trying to be nice to the man and he wanted to cop an attitude. That’s why she should have kept being mean to him.
Men are such a trip. Treat them bad and they can’t get enough of you. Treat them nice and they give you their behinds to kiss.
“I just…I just can’t believe you’re not going to tell me who did this to you. And then you keep pushing me away like it’s nothing. Like I’m nothing. Like we didn’t mean anything to each other. Carla…I let you do that when I was in jail ’cause I figured maybe it was for the best. I mean, it wasn’t like I could do anything for you in jail. But I’m not gonna let you do that now.”
“Let me? Hmph.” Carla finished her cigarette and put it out before standing up. “You’re not the boss of me. I can do whatever I want. And I can take care of my own problems. I’ve been doing it for a long time.”
“Is that how you got hooked on crack? Handling your own problems by taking them to the pipe?” The edge in his voice let her know he’d had his fill of being nice to her. The kid gloves had come off with a vengeance.
“That’s low, Gerald.”
His eyes narrowed, and he harrumphed. “No. Low is me finding out my girl is out on the streets, whoring for the man who might have set me up.”
Carla swallowed and sat back on the sofa. “I wasn’t—”
“You wasn’t? You wasn’t? You sure you want to keep on lying? Ain’t that going against one of your twelve steps?”
Her heart started beating double time in her chest. Gerald knew about her and C-Money, and he was still trying to be with her. The sheer thought of it blew her away. She would never in a million years have considered that he could find out about her transgressions and still love her. That was why she’d thought she had to keep it a secret. She hadn’t wanted Gerald to know she had sunk so low.
“If I didn’t know C-Money was in jail for selling that crack he got you hooked on, I would know who did this to you. But it couldn’t have been him. So who was it? Did he have one of his thugs beat you up?”
Carla tried to think of a reason, any reason, why she shouldn’t tell Gerald the truth. The battle between those two had been a long time coming, and honestly, she was tired of being a casualty of their dang war. Hell, she was nobody’s dang collateral damage, and neither was her child.
“Can I have another cigarette?”
Gerald handed her the pack but he still had that stern expression on his face. Even in his obvious anger, he still lit her smoke and patiently waited for her to open up.
“C-Money ain’t in jail. And for the record, I didn’t want to get involved with him when you got locked up for murder. Let’s just say he made it hard for a girl to say no.” She took a long drag.
The expression on Gerald’s face would have stopped anyone in his or her tracks. She had never seen him so angry.
“He did this to you?”
She shrugged. “He doesn’t like it when you come around.”
&nb
sp; “You still messing with him?” His voice choked a little, as his anger turned to hurt.
She wished she could take it all away. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Gerald.
“Not by choice.”
Gerald closed his eyes and clenched his hands so tightly the brown of his knuckles appeared almost white. He snarled, “I’m gonna kill him.”
“Then you really will be a murderer, and you’ll go back to jail.”
“If he was the man who set me up, the man who then started seeing my woman and made her stop me from seeing even a picture of my daughter, then he’s the man who stole my life from me, and he has to pay.”
“So, you just gonna let him steal the rest of your life, too?”
“You don’t understand!”
“Oh, I understand perfectly. It’s a man thing, and you want to continue your little pissing contest. All I ask is that you let me and my child get out of the line of fire this time. Help me talk Brat into moving me to Los Angeles with her as soon as possible. ’Cause, honestly, he came at me this time, but he said he might just be coming for her next. Who knows what he’ll do when he sees I didn’t heed his warning and stay away from you?”
Gerald leaped up from the seat and paced the floor like a caged bear.
Carla put out her second cigarette and reached for another. They were lights, after all, and she reasoned it would take at least three or four to give her the kick she needed to really plot her way out of the C-Money mess.
But if she got Gerald to work with her, then she could get herself and Penny out of there and safe. That was the only thing that really mattered now.
She smoked the third cigarette and watched him pace. Each step his long legs took back and forth around the small room seemed to have an impact on some part of her body. The first go-round made her nipples stand at attention. The second caused moisture to pool between her legs. And then he’d pause and stare at her for a few seconds before stalking around again. She fanned her neck and put out her fourth cigarette before standing up and walking over to him.
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