by Claire Adams
Be nice, Evie, I told myself firmly. It isn’t his fault that you find him boring. One of these days, if the universe is fair, he’ll find some girl who thinks his smarts and interest in economics and politics are absolutely charming.
The waiter came and removed the entrée plates, and I tried to rack my brain for something to talk about next. I wondered to myself if Derick was finding the date as hopeless as I was—if he was certain there would be no second date, or if that decision had only been made by me. I was spared the need to come up with something to talk about, however.
Before the dessert could come out, Derick and I were interrupted by someone who rushed up to the table, looking barely dressed enough to even be allowed into the restaurant at all. As the figure approached, I thought there was something familiar about it—and then all at once I realized it was Zack. I nearly dropped my wine glass in surprise at the sight of the man I least expected to show up to interrupt my date.
Oh god, I thought with dread. I thought his name too many times. It was actually as if I had summoned him with nothing more than my thoughts. I took a deep breath as Zack came up to the table, stopping short and looking from me to Derick.
“What are you doing here?” I asked him, setting down my wine glass as carefully as I could. My hands were shaking slightly at the sight of him.
“Evie, you’re making a big mistake,” Zack said, crossing his arms and looking Derick over.
“I don’t happen to think so—and besides, what business is it of yours?” Derick looked desperately uncomfortable and I couldn’t blame him; for the first time in the entire night I could actually sympathize with him.
“I went to your room to try and talk to you about this whole stupid mess we’re in, but your roommate told me you were on a date.” Zack scowled at me, his arms crossed over his chest and his dark eyes full of brittle anger.
“We broke up Zack,” I said, trying to keep my voice calm and level. “I didn’t see you chasing after me when it happened, and you haven’t exactly seemed interested in trying to fix anything. So it’s none of your business who I go on a date with.”
“Yeah, well, Jess obviously thought it was my business because she told me you’d be here with this guy.” Zack gestured dismissively towards Derick. “No offense, dude, but you are not the kind of guy that Evie should be dating.”
I rolled my eyes. “You’re a fine one to talk about who I should be dating! Why do you even care? I’m sure there’s some sorority sister just looking to hop into your bed and help you keep it warm.”
Zack let out a sound like a growl, his hands clenching briefly into fists as he looked from Derick to me.
“This is a big mistake you’re making, Evie. I could really make you happy but you’re never going to look past your own stupid insecurities to even listen to me.”
I shook my head. “The only person making a mistake here is you. What the hell did you think it would accomplish to barge in on me in the middle of a date? You know what, don’t answer.” Derick was frozen in his seat, humiliated, obviously unwilling or unable to stick up for himself. “You’re wasting your time and a stunt like this is not even remotely the way to get me back.”
Zack stared at me for a long moment and exhaled sharply, stepping back from the table.
“You’re making a big mistake, Evie,” he said, turning to go. “But it’s obvious you don’t even want to believe me.”
I let out a sigh of relief as he stalked away from the patio, out into the darkness of the parking lot beyond. I covered my eyes with my hand.
“I’m really sorry, Derick,” I said, smiling wryly. “I had no idea that he was going to do that—he and I aren’t even in a relationship anymore.”
Derick shakily reached out and lifted his wine glass, taking a sip. “You handled him well. I was starting to think we’d have to call the waiter over to boot him.”
I smiled weakly. All I wanted was to finish my dessert and get home, get out of the uncomfortable shoes, and take a long shower before throwing myself into bed. Fortunately, everything seemed to settle down once more as the waiter brought our desserts; I didn’t even put up a token resistance when Derick took the check the moment it landed on the table—I knew that I couldn’t even afford to pay for my half of the meal, or possibly even the tip.
I let Derick walk me to my room, and even let him put his arm around my waist, feeling shaken and frustrated and depressed by Zack’s appearance at the date, even if I hadn’t particularly enjoyed Derick’s company. I still had no intention of going on another date with Derick, but I did let him kiss me good night at my door; I kept it as chaste as possible and made the excuse that I was exhausted when I could tell that he wanted to be invited in.
Jess was waiting for me on the couch. The moment I had the door closed behind me, I kicked off my shoes and handed them to her. “Well, that was a disaster of epic proportions,” I said, sinking down on the closer chair and pulling my hair down and out of the style she had woven it into.
“Was Derick like a total jerk or something?”
I shook my head. “No, he was polite as could be. But Zack decided to barge in just before dessert and humiliate me in front of an entire restaurant full of people.”
Jess cringed. “I’m sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “He came in here and demanded to know where you were, and I told him I’d set you up on a date with one of my classmates in exchange for homework help. He got the restaurant out of me and I told him like five times not to go—that it would be stupid and you’d hate it—but I guess he decided that I had no idea what I was talking about.”
I leaned back, closing my eyes for a moment.
“Yeah, he came right up to the table and told me I was making a huge mistake, blah blah blah…it was awful. And Derick had about as much spine as an overcooked spaghetti noodle.” Jess grimaced again. “I will not be going out on a second date with him. If you need more Econ help, go to the library and get a regular tutor.”
“I will keep that in mind,” Jess said. “The food was good at least, right?”
“It was great. Now let’s see if I can make it to bed without hurling it all up.”
CHAPTER FOUR
It surprised me to realize that a month had passed since I had broken things off with Zack and since the disastrous date with Jess’ classmate. She did get the help that she had bartered a date with me for, and she was confident in finishing up the semester with a good grade that would let her go on to other more interesting classes. I had managed to put Zack more or less out of my mind, and to prevent Jess from sending me on any more dates, or even trying to make me go out with her to party; in fact, getting closer and closer to finals, she was cutting back on partying on her own.
It had been a good break, and I was finally starting to really and truly relax into life once more. After a week or two, I stopped trying to hide out in my room and started to actually get involved in campus life a little more. It helped that in the time since the final game of the football season, the campus newspaper had put me onto covering the basketball team. The first game I went to, when I interviewed a few of the players afterward, one of them ventured the opinion that he had been proud of the way I’d stood up for myself with Zack, that I was an impressive woman.
I kept up with all of my classes and even started to take on a few other responsibilities on the newspaper, not just doing my own assignments but also taking some of the proofreading load off of the editors, reading through articles that came in and checking them for spelling and grammar before handing them off to the editors.
“I keep finding new reasons to thank Professor Grant for signing you on,” Lisa told me once, shaking her head at how much my additions had helped the whole team. I hadn’t been there long enough to start pitching my own article ideas; I was still on assignments handed out by the editorial staff—things that they had no one in particular to cover—but I was gaining trust and I had gotten hints that in the spring semester I would start being able to put f
orth my own ideas in the weekly meeting.
I hadn’t even tried to date anyone at all in the time since the disaster with Derick. I told myself that I was swearing off of boys for good and that I’d just wait until I graduated and find some actual men to involve myself with once I could get started on my career. I knew it wouldn’t last, but for the time being, it was good enough for me. I had time to hang out with Jess, and I started to become better friends with some of the staff of the newspaper; I was satisfied with that and didn’t even want to try for more.
I went into Lisa’s office after classes, ready to be told that I was going to be covering something other than the basketball team; her email to me had hinted that I was changing up duties. “Hey, here I am,” I said, opening the door to the office after knocking. “What’s the sitch, Chief?”
Lisa laughed. “Take a seat. Let me just finish this email and I’ll give you the lowdown.” I sat down and took my notebook out of my bag, watching as Lisa tapped out the last few sentences in an email in a rapid staccato. “So, Evie. As I’m sure you’re aware, we’re coming up on the championship game for the football team.”
My heart started to beat faster in my chest.
“Yeah, I’m aware of that,” I said, more because I knew she was expecting me to say something.
In the back of my mind I had been counting down the days—I knew that everyone on campus was buzzing with excitement over it. Some of the students had booked their plane tickets and the boosters were trying to get as many people to the game as possible. I knew that there were some people planning a road trip out to California where the stadium was at. I had told myself over and over again that I didn’t care, that whatever happened to the football team was barely my business, but I had been hoping against hope that I would be too busy on other assignments when the game came up.
“Well, Coach Bullden specifically requested that we send you to cover the game,” Lisa said, smiling broadly at me.
“That’s—Wow. I wouldn’t have expected that.” I felt my cheeks burning. It shouldn’t have surprised me, with the praise the coach had lavished on me for my previous coverage of the team.
“I was pretty surprised too. You must have really impressed him.” I nodded. Lisa watched me intently for a moment, tapping idly on the top of her desk. “Look, everyone on campus knows there’s been… issues with you and Zack. If you can’t handle this, let me know and I’ll tell Bullden that you’re covering something else and we can’t spare you.”
It was tempting. If I could just back out of the situation completely—if I could avoid having to go to California and face the possibility of having to confront Zack again, it would be a major relief. But I thought about the fact that Bullden had requested me specifically. And the fact that I knew I had done well in my previous articles about the team and its games. Besides, it wasn’t likely that I’d have to interview Zack—he might not even be at the game at all. I had determinedly not kept up with the drama surrounding his suspension; I had banned all mention of him from Jess.
“Is Zack going to be playing, then?” I asked, trying to keep my voice as neutral as possible.
“Oh yeah, he’s definitely in the game. Didn’t you hear? The investigation found out that the picture they turned in was from like, two years ago or something. They had nothing against Zack that was more recent.” The words hit me like a ton of bricks; I felt awful. I hadn’t even listened to him when he’d tried to explain.
“That’s…good to know,” I said, smiling nervously. “I’ll let you know if I can do it with my classes.” I didn’t want to even hint at the possibility that Zack’s being present at the game would deter me. Even if Lisa knew—she had mentioned it directly, after all—that I had personal issues with the star QB, I didn’t want to make that the reason that I couldn’t go.
“Just as long as you give me a couple of days to find a replacement,” Lisa said, nodding.
I stood up and left Lisa’s office, my mind a blur with different thoughts. Could I really hold it against Zack that two years ago he’d had girls all over him? How could I know whether he’d changed? I sat down on one of the benches in the Student Union, watching people pass through on their way to classes or going to club meetings. I chewed on my bottom lip, putting my notebook back into my bag and trying not to look like I was a nervous wreck. It wasn’t that the idea of seeing Zack in person was so terrible, but knowing that I had misjudged him made me feel horrible.
But had I really? Just because they didn’t have anything on Zack—no evidence that he was still partying or involved in potentially illegal activities—didn’t mean he wasn’t still the party-rager he had been. Could I really trust that he had changed?
I thought about the fact that he had tracked me down on my horrible date with Derick specifically to try and explain to me what the real situation was. I hadn’t even heard him out; I was already angry—and the way he’d gone about trying to convince me to listen to him was definitely a bad idea. But ever since then, he had left me alone—and I had avoided him. I had judged him based on the thought that the picture had been recent, and I had been wrong. He had probably already moved on. I didn’t know how I felt about that possibility; in spite of the fact that I’d been avoiding him, and the fact that I had thought I was over him, deep down I knew that there was still something unresolved between us. It wasn’t fair of me that I’d taken my initial anger at him and blown it all out of proportion, and didn’t even give him a chance to explain his side. And I may have lost him for good because of that.
I spent the rest of the day with my mind on the game and on Zack. I couldn’t really blame him if he had given up on me. It seemed like almost from the beginning of the time we’d reunited, things had been stacked against us—though I was mature enough to admit that part of that was my fault. I was afraid of getting involved with him, afraid of how easily I could fall head over heels for him. If he had given up on me, that would never be an issue; and while it was a relief to think that Zack had probably found another girl who was a little more able to deal with having a relationship with him, it also made me miserable to think that I’d ruined my chances with him for good. I only had a couple of days to think about taking the assignment. Lisa sent me an email in the afternoon detailing what the newspaper wanted for the coverage; since it was a huge game and a major opportunity, it was going to be featured on the front page of the edition, with supplemental material in the sports section. She wanted interviews with the team and backgrounds and profiles on the different players. She also wanted full coverage of the game itself for the main story. It was a lot of work; it would be great for anyone’s portfolio.
I wasn’t sure what to do. I had to let Lisa know, and soon, but I had no idea how I was going to deal with the situation. I tried to go through my normal routines, to pay attention in my classes, but it was no use. Until I figured everything out, I was just going to continue being hopelessly distracted.
CHAPTER FIVE
The next day, I was sitting in the dorm, waiting for it to be time to get to my next class of the day—I’d had a gap between lunch and class, and of course the only way I could think to fill it was with thinking about Zack and the assignment to cover the national championship. I had told Jess that I would do it and she had given me the instructions I needed to get to the game; I would be staying at the same hotel as the team and I could bring someone with me. I also had prime seats in the enormous stadium.
Jess came into the room, practically bouncing. “So,” she said, throwing herself down onto the couch next to me, “I hear you’ve got the prime seats to the championship game.”
I rolled my eyes. “They want me to go and cover it. Apparently Bullden specifically requested me. I’m supposed to interview everyone, too.”
“So who are you taking with you? Got a date? That would be a primo way to convince a guy to help you dirty up a hotel room.”
I groaned, throwing my head back and shifting uncomfortably on the couch.
�
�I could just watch the game on TV and interview everyone once they get back,” I said, staring up at the ceiling.
Jess laughed. “Yeah, sure you can—and you could also hit up one of the sororities and join them. Come on, Evie. Just because you’ve got issues with Zack or whatever doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a good time. Hell, take me.”
I sighed. “I really just…” I scrubbed at my face. “So I found out—and please don’t laugh at the fact that it’s old news—but I figured out that I’d sort of…misjudged Zack.”
Jess raised an eyebrow. “Oh, we can talk about that situation now?”
I rolled my eyes. “Anyway, I found out about it and now I feel like shit because I didn’t even give him a chance to explain what the picture was, and I’m pretty sure he’s probably already moved on. I don’t want to have to see him.”
“Well, I mean, you’re going to have to move beyond that eventually, right? So just take advantage of the fact that the school is basically paying you to visit California and watch a really awesome football game.”
“If I let you come with me, you’re not going to like…try and make me go to some crazy party after, right? I mean, I just want to do what I came there or and come back.”
“Okay—how about a compromise? I won’t drag you to a party, but if I meet a guy there and want to bring him back to the hotel, or even if you do, the other one of us will hang out at the pool or wherever to give the other some privacy.”
“Are you seriously thinking of snagging a guy at the championship game?”
Jess shrugged with a little grin.
“Adrenaline pumping, excitement; win or lose, it’s pretty much a sure thing, right?”
I tried not to groan again. Sometimes I really did wonder if Jess considered going to college to be little more than an excuse to get with as many guys as she possibly could. It wasn’t fair of me—I knew she was making good grades—but sometimes it seemed like she spent more time making plans to ensnare a hot guy for a night or two than she did on her classes.