by Kim Stokely
“The Elders are insisting I spend tomorrow in Seclusion. Some kind of tradition before I’m crowned.”
Noam groaned. “A time of fasting, prayer and contemplation. I’d forgotten.”
“Well, apparently they haven’t. They’ll come for me shortly after dawn and lock me in the chapel tent. I’m afraid of what Braedon might do during that time. If he can steal Josh away during the ceremony, he’ll use him as leverage to get me to sign who knows what kind of deals with the Mystics.”
“You are sure you will be able to find the Chrysaline and get it to Josh in time?”
I nodded. “Can you organize the rest?”
He sighed. “I will try.”
My heart weighed heavy in my chest. I leaned over and kissed Noam’s cheek. “Thank you for doing this.”
“Do not thank me , My Lady, until I have proven successful.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
Escape
I found the passage to Josh’s room after dinner. Even though it was early evening, Josh lay sprawled on his bed, asleep. With one arm he hugged a pillow. The other rested above his head. His chest rose and fell as he breathed. I crept to the side of the bed.
“Josh.”
He didn’t move.
I spoke a little louder. “Josh.”
He rolled to his side and snuggled closer with the pillow. I put my hand on his shoulder, rocking him gently. His right arm swung out to knock me away. His eyes fluttered open for a moment. I leaned closer.
“Josh, you have to wake up.”
“Why?” he moaned.
“Because I need to talk to you. Wake up!” I nudged him again.
He rolled onto his back and stared up at me. “What?”
I grabbed his hand, pulling him into a sitting position, then sat on the bed next to him. “Listen to me. We’re going to try and get you out of here before it’s too late.”
“Who’s we?” He rubbed his face.
“Noam and I. We have a plan.” I could see consciousness slowly seeping back into his brain.
“What’s the plan?”
“Noam’s working out the details. But I want you to be ready.”
“Ready when?”
“Soon.” I put my hand on his leg. “Tonight.”
“Are you coming too?”
I studied the stone floor.
“Ally?”
“No.”
Harsh lines of anger replaced the slackness of sleep on his face. “I told you I wanted to stay.”
“It’s too dangerous.”
“I don’t care, Ally.” His voice rose. “I won’t go.”
“Shhhhh,” I grabbed his arm. “The guards. No one knows I’m here.”
He pulled me to my feet. He leaned down then pressed his lips to mine. His kiss was desperate. I could find no gentleness, just a hard, forceful plea.
I pushed my hands against his chest. “Stop it!”
“Ally, why are you doing this?”
“Because I love you, stupid.” I backed away. “Because I can’t bear to think of you being hurt because of me.”
A quick smile flashed across his face. “You love me?”
“Yes.” I walked to the fireplace, putting my palms against the warm stones of the mantle in an effort to ground myself. “But I’m not in love with you.”
In a moment he was behind me, wrapping his arms around my waist. “You could be, if you stopped thinking about the past.” He turned my head to his then kissed me again. Softer. Deeper.
I shifted my body so that I faced him. My hands left the hearth and found his hair. It was slicker than normal since he hadn’t showered in a few days, but still fine, like feathers. He pressed me back against the stones, his fingers drifting down my neck to the collar of my dress. I couldn’t tell if the heat I felt came from the fireplace or his touch. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was how much I needed this. How much I wanted it. To know someone loved me, as Ally Foster. Not as Queen Alystrine and what they thought I could do for them.
This isn’t love.
I tried not to listen to the voice in my brain and let Josh’s warm breath caress my neck even as his lips burned my skin.
He’s your friend, your brother, but he is not your soul mate.
Who was speaking to me? Who was trying to get me to stop feeling everything I was feeling?
Josh’s hands moved down to my waist, drawing me even closer to him. For a moment I lost myself in the sensations coursing through me.
Stop!
I put my hands on his wrists and lifted them from my body.
His eyes searched mine. “What is it?”
“As much as I want to, I can’t do this.”
He cupped my face. “Yes, you can.” He leaned down to kiss me again but I turned my head. “What’s wrong?”
“This isn’t right.”
“It is right. We love each other.”
For the moment, I had perfect clarity. “We think we do, right now.” I wriggled out from his arms and paced to the foot of the bed. “But we’re doing this because we’re desperate to keep a piece of each other. But that’s not what love is.”
His voice was quiet, but intense. “Then what is it?”
I held back the tears building up behind my eyes. “It’s letting go.” I let out a shuddering breath. “Letting go when everything in your heart tells you not to.”
He stared at me then. Tall. Silent. Sad. “That doesn’t make sense.”
I wrapped my arms around my stomach, trying to hold myself together. “I love you, Josh, but not like you want me to. Maybe someday it would have grown to that.”
“But now we’ll never know.”
“I’m sorry.” I choked on a sob. “If I slept with you now, it would be so I could keep a piece of my old life, a piece of you, here with me. And that wouldn’t be fair to either of us.”
He didn’t turn away from me and I couldn’t pull myself from the hold of his eyes. We stared in silence. I tried to memorize everything about him, from the crazy way his hair spiked out from his head, to the tiny mole on the back of his right hand. I think he was trying to do the same thing with me.
Finally, he broke the quiet. “Can I hold you?” He took a step toward me. “I promise, nothing more.”
I ran into his outstretched arms and clung to him, letting myself grieve over the future we would never have together.
We sat then and talked about memories. Our first meeting on the playground during recess. How I’d pushed him off the swings and Renee had come to his defense, pulling my hair until I let Josh back on. We talked about teachers we’d had, vacations I’d taken with his family, all while holding hands. We made it up to high school before we heard voices outside the door. I dove under the bed as someone entered.
“Hello, Josh McNeil.”
“Noam, how are you?”
The door shut behind him. “There’s no time to waste. Take off your clothes. The Lady Alystrine should be here shortly.”
I crawled out from under the bed. “Actually, I’m here already.”
Noam’s eyes widened at the sight of me on the floor but he remained respectful. “My mother will be here soon to guide Josh out of the palace.” He took off his robe and started to untie the linen shirt he wore underneath.
I turned to face the corner while he and Josh traded clothes. “Your mother? She’s going to help?”
Noam continued to explain the plan. “She’ll come and tell the guards she needs to see me. That’s when Josh will leave with her. She knows where Quinn is hiding. She’ll take you to him.”
“We’re decent,” Josh said.
I turned around as Noam put on Josh’s blue vest and Josh slipped the Elder’s robe over his head.
Noam fiddled with the waist of Josh’s pants, rolling it a few times before retying the woven belt that held them up. He glanced up at Josh. “You’re a little taller than me.”
Josh looked at the robe he wore. The hem lay at his ankles. “You think anyone will not
ice?”
Noam shook his head. “Mystics tend to ignore us, when at all possible. It’s only in the Assembly chambers that they ever even speak to us.” He looked around the room. “Where is the Chrysaline?”
I ran to the hearth and pulled out the stone that hid the orb.
“Has it been there the whole time?” Noam asked. He frowned when I nodded. “How did you know about this space?”
I knelt down on the hearth. “A Messenger.”
Noam gasped.
Josh peered over my shoulder. “What’s a Messenger?”
“Servants of Ruahk.” Noam stared at me. “You’ve seen them?”
“Uh-huh. At least I think so. He was made of golden light. He didn’t speak, at least out loud. But I knew what he wanted.” I tilted my head toward the orb. “He showed me this place.” I reached my hand toward it but stopped. “Josh, you come take it. I’m afraid if either Noam or I touch it, even though it’s wrapped up, it may still send off a signal of some kind.”
Josh pulled out the orb. He cradled it against his stomach. Noam pulled the sleeves of the robe over it. Josh looked as if he clasped his hands in prayer. The guards’ voices rose outside the door and I scooted back under the bed. Noam sat behind the desk. He put his head down as if deep in thought. Josh stood with his back to the door.
I pushed myself further under as the guard swung open the door. “Elder Noam?”
Josh turned slightly. “Yes?”
Nitza entered. “It’s your father. We must get to the Elder Lands as quickly as possible.”
“Of course, Mother,” Josh answered. He turned to Noam. “Thank you.”
Noam nodded.
Josh paused at the door. “Good-bye.”
Then he was gone.
I slid out from the bed. “Where are your clothes?”
“In the stable.”
I shuddered at the thought of going back there.
Noam must have seen my fear. “The stables made more sense than the garden at this time of evening. I didn’t know of anyplace else you’d been to in the castle where there wouldn’t be people.”
“You did the right thing.” I sat down on the bed. “I should make sure there’s no one there now.” I closed my eyes and sent my spirit out. The stalls were dark. No one but the horses made a noise. I focused on Josh. In an instant I floated behind him as he neared the main door to the palace. He and Nitza passed through unnoticed. I hoped their luck would hold out so they could walk through the castle gate without a problem.
I pulled myself back to Noam, my spirit reconnecting to my body with a jolt. “The barn looks clear. And your mother and Josh are almost to the gate.”
Relief spread across Noam’s face. “Then, if you don’t mind, I’d like to get out of this room before I’m found.” He held out his hand and helped me stand.
“Have you traveled through a passage before?” I asked.
Noam shook his head.
“It’s a little disconcerting. Just keep hold of my hand and we’ll be there in a second.”
At the first tug into the passage, Noam’s fingers dug into mine. Fortunately, the trip was quick. My feet hit the straw on the floor before he totally cut off the circulation in my hands. It took a moment for my eyes to adjust to the lack of light in the barn.
Noam bent his legs “I used to be envious of Portals.” He took in a heaving breath. “Not anymore.”
I chuckled. “Try going between worlds. That’ll really make your head spin.”
A raspy voice spoke from the shadows in the corner. “He won’t be doing that soon. I can assure you of that.”
Noam pushed me behind him. “Who’s there?”
The straw rustled on the floor as the shape of a man approached. “An old friend.” He stopped in a shaft of moonlight slipping between slats of the barn. Tall and bald. I knew he’d sounded familiar.
My voice came out as a gasp, “Faolan.” The head of the Sanctuary had betrayed me and the Elders by turning me over to Braedon. Without his treachery, I could have stayed in the Elder Lands indefinitely until I’d trained in my gifts. I could have taken the throne when I was ready, not when it was forced on me.
“I’m honored you remember me, Alystrine.”
I stepped around Noam. “Braedon said you’d be punished for what you did to me.”
He laughed then. An awful choking sound. “Oh, I was punished, but not for what I did, for what I failed to do. You were supposed to be broken when you arrived.” I could see his eyes now in the dim light. Haunted. I could only imagine what he’d endured by failing the Lord Regent.
He moved unexpectedly, grabbing my arm and pulling me to him. Malice replaced the haunted look. “This all would have gone much smoother if you had only been broken.”
Noam took my other arm, wish boning me between them. “She’s your queen. You’ll not harm her.”
I grimaced as Faolan’s grip tightened. “She won’t be harmed. Yet.” Again, he made that choking laugh. “I cannot promise the same for you.”
I tried to wrench my arm from him, but he held me too tight. “How did you find us?”
“The Lord Regent thought you would be foolish enough to try and help your friend,” he said the word “friend” with disdain, “to escape before your coronation. The other Portals and I have been watching your casting. Waiting for you to try and carry him through a passage.”
“Casting?”
“It’s a kind of binding,” Noam explained. I couldn’t see his face, but he sounded angry. “A mark that those who worship the Fallen can see. They weave it into clothing or cast it into a piece of jewelry.”
Faolan thrust me aside so he could look more closely at Noam. “And how would you know that, Traveler?”
I sensed Noam’s confusion and answered before Faolan recognized his mistake. “He’s been talking with the Elders. One of them must have told him.” I pressed the thought to Noam’s mind, Keep pretending you’re Josh and we can buy him and your mother more time to escape. They must have marked his clothes as well as mine. I sought to turn Faolan’s focus back to me. “Who put a mark on me?”
His teeth shone eerily in the dim light, reminding me of the fangs of a rabid animal. “You should know by now, Alystrine, no one can be trusted.” He let out a guttural bark and the barn doors swung open. The moonlight illuminated the silhouettes of four Black Guards. “Take the boy to the dungeon.”
The sleeve of my dress tore as I wrenched myself from Faolan’s grasp. “No!” I flung myself between Noam and the approaching Guards.
“There’s nothing you can do,” whispered Noam.
I pushed him toward one of the stalls and away from Faolan. Clutching his shirt, I reached out to find the passage to my rooms. Someone shrieked as we appeared, on the floor, with Noam now on top of me.
“By Ruahk,” Geran’s voice growled. His footsteps drew close.
Noam rolled off me, gasping.
Geran grabbed the young man by the hair and yanked him off the ground.
I jumped up, ran to the door and pulled down the beam of wood to lock it before trying to explain the situation to my family. It had been their nightly ritual to gather in my sitting room to discuss the coronation. I’d told Rhoswen to tell them I’d insisted on walking down to the kitchen for a cup of chamomile tea to settle my nerves for the evening. My father’s cheeks reddened with anger while the others looked more confused than mad.
“I told you to stay away from this boy.” Geran shook Noam’s head. The young man frantically tried to free himself from Geran’s grip.
“That’s not Josh,” I told him.
By this time, we were surrounded by on lookers. Kennis and Rhoswen stood behind me while Devnet and Maris stood by Geran. My father held Noam out at arm’s length and stared at him. Without warning he released him. Noam fell to the floor, rubbing his scalp. “Explain this.”
I growled with impatient frustration. “Noam helped me get Josh out of the castle. They switched clothes but apparently the Mysti
cs put some kind of mark on us.” I helped Noam to his feet. “Take off the clothes.”
Noam slipped the shirt over his head. “I’ll need something to wear.”
I ripped the shirt from his hands hurried to the fireplace intent on throwing it in.
“Wait!” Noam called.
I held the shirt over the flames. “Why?”
“If the casting is in that, they’ll wonder where I’ve gone.” He had untied his pants but held them up at his waist. “If you keep them here, while I escape, we may fool the Mystics into believing I’m, or rather Josh, is still with you.”
“We don’t have much time.” As if to prove my point, someone pounded on the door.
“Lady Alystrine!” Faolan’s voice barked. “In the name of the Lord Regent, I command you to open this door at once.”
“Devnet, switch clothes with Noam.” I didn’t wait to see if he’d agree. “Geran, can you transport Noam somewhere near a castle exit?”
Geran looked doubtful. “I cannot take him far.”
“As far as you can away from here. That will have to do.”
Kennis, Maris and I turned our backs while Noam and Devnet swapped clothing. The sound of stomping feet in the hallway signaled the coming of Braedon’s soldiers.
“Hurry,” I whispered under my breath as the sound drew closer.
“Come,” Geran ordered.
I turned as my father grabbed Noam and the two disappeared. Please, please protect them. “Now what?”
The guards pounded on the door, demanding entrance.
Devnet tucked Noam’s shirt into his pants. “Now we wait.”
I paced the room. “I don’t understand why Faolan doesn’t take a passage in.”
Maris grinned. “He’s not a Portal. Besides, the Elders have put their own barriers around this room so only you and Geran may come in through a passage.”
“Grandma!” Even through the tension, I found myself smiling. “You tricky woman, you.”
She sat down on the couch. “We have learned a few things from the Mystics.”
The soldiers continued their assault on my door
I chewed on my thumbnail. “Do you think he’ll make it out?”
Instead of answering me, Maris folded her hands and closed her eyes. Her lips moved but no words came out.