by Cait Ashwood
To an outsider, the courtyard might look like chaos, but there was subtle organization present in each sector. Despite her guilt at Lily’s continued absence, it felt good to be out doing things again. Pebble, as she’d finally decided to name the pup, lay at her feet, panting in the warm spring air. The dog had been the beginning of her awakening, and now Audrey was starting to feel fully human again. Hound had even started returning to their chambers some nights, and that had only helped her further. I was never alone. I just thought I was.
Looking out at all of this, all the people here so dedicated to a common cause, she couldn’t understand how she’d ever believed it in the first place. It was easy to be prideful, to think that she’d built all this, but as her son had so succinctly pointed out, it was hardly her doing. She’d been the spark; it had taken the rest of them to build it into a bonfire.
I could see myself being happy here. It was the first hopeful thought she’d had in a while. Once they got Lily back--and they were going to get her back--Audrey’s life would be complete. She’d step down as First, Brana would take over, and for the first time in nearly nineteen years, her life would be her own again. She could be a wife, a mother, a human, instead of the First and all the required perfection that came with the title. She could laugh at inappropriate jokes, she could be seen wherever she wanted and it wouldn’t matter, because she wasn’t the First. The freedom was tantalizing and invigorating. All that stood between her and what she so desperately wanted was finally putting an end to Zaddicus, once and for all.
Rowan had made a full report on how he’d been manipulated by the boy that kidnapped Lily. One squad of the mixed bloods were trying to replicate it. Audrey let her sight slip into the taint and watched them at their work. They were focusing on small things for the moment, the immobilization of a hand or arm. One girl in particular was having quite a bit of luck. She had a best friend among the Chosen, an animal seer, and the connection became apparent to Audrey almost at once.
“Ladies! Think of the taint as a constrictor, like you’re squeezing the limb. Once you have it wrapped tightly enough, you can tug it any which way you like, and it will obey you.” She may not be able to use the taint, but she sure as hell could see it.
Some of the women caught on faster than others, but the improvement was obvious even to the Seekers on the wall. If the women could neutralize Zaddicus’ fighters, the battle could definitely swing in the Order’s favor.
The girl she’d been watching initially surged ahead of the rest of the group. Are there limitations to what can be done with this? As sick as the idea made her, she needed to know if the taint could be used to kill.
The Order had taken to raising some of its own livestock to win more independence from the towns supporting them. While spring typically wasn’t the season for slaughter, there was an old boar that had been gored badly during the mating season and barely recovered. He wouldn’t be good eating, which meant that if the taint ended up affecting the meat, there would be no great loss. Audrey waved one of the Seekers over and communicated her request. She got an odd look from the man, but he obeyed without much question.
He reappeared in the courtyard after a few minutes, his hand on the old boar. He’d hobbled the beast, lest he get any ideas of running free and causing a ruckus.
Now for the hard part. Audrey approached the girl, who was successfully making her volunteer dance a jig. “You’re doing well,” she offered. The girl flashed her a beaming smile. Audrey ran through the records in her head, ashamed that she didn’t know all of her people on sight.
“You’re Summer, right?” She was one of the older girls, a third gen and thus one of the more tainted women in the Order.
The girl nodded. “Yes, First, that’s me.”
Audrey smiled, the expression feeling fake. “I need to ask you to do something very difficult for me.”
Summer wiped her hands on her apron and nodded. “If I can, I will.”
“I’ll let you take that back if you change your mind.” Audrey gave a nervous chuckle, glancing over her shoulder at the hobbled boar. “I need to know if the taint can be used to kill, the same way it can be used to control.”
Summer blanched as she glanced at the pig. “You... want me to kill the pig?”
Audrey nodded. “He’s old, Summer. He was king of his harem for many years, but was dethroned last fall. The younger boars bully him and run him off now, so his time here is about done.” If she could make her feel better about it, it would help.
Summer stared at him for a long while. “So, I’d need to strangle him?”
Audrey blinked. “I suppose that would work, yes. If you’re willing to try it.”
The girl grimaced. “We need to know what they’re capable of. It’s not something I ever want to do to a fellow human, but if Brana is going to help shield our fighters, she needs to know how they’re going to be attacked.”
“You’re very sensible.” In a Tower full of women, emotion was sometimes the first response, not reason. That wasn’t to say they didn’t eventually get to reason, but only a few of the women in the Tower could completely circumvent an emotional response, especially to something as visceral as killing.
“Okay. I’ll try it.” Summer’s eyes glowed purple, and Audrey turned to watch.
She wrapped cords of the taint around the beast’s neck many, many times, leaving a tendril at each end. When she was satisfied, she yanked both ends, hard. Not only did she kill the boar, but the action managed to completely decapitate him.
Training stopped as the pig’s head rolled across the floor of the courtyard.
Audrey glanced at the Seekers watching from the wall. Hound had joined them not long ago, and she knew he’d seen the demonstration. If this was what Zaddicus was after, if this was the kind of warrior they were raising, the sort that could kill simply with the power of their thoughts, then they were up against something much worse than the last time they’d met him on the field.
Summer was pale, shaken at what her actions had done.
Audrey walked over to her and put a hand on her shoulder. “Thank you, Summer. You’ve given us all something very serious to think about here, and we’ll use this gift.”
She nodded, but still seemed shell shocked.
“Why don’t you take the rest of the day off? I believe our stock of toiletries came in from the Alchemy Guild this morning. That means fresh soaps, lotions, and bath oils. The rest of them are still training, so you’ll have the place to yourself.”
“O-okay. I mean, yes, First.” Summer shook herself, finally tearing her eyes away from the pig.
Audrey watched her as she headed into the Tower, unsurprised to feel Hound phase in at her side.
“Tops was right all along,” he muttered, eyes on the carcass even as the kitchen help was starting to clean up the mess.
“It appears he was. Though we’ve made it this far without anyone realizing the potential for destruction.” That had to mean something, at least.
“That means this Stryker kid didn’t actually want to hurt Rowan. If she could do it, he certainly could.”
Audrey wasn’t sure what that statement was supposed to imply. He’d stolen her daughter from them. How could his intent not have been to cause pain and hurt?
Hound shook his head. “We need to tell Ace.”
“That’s going to be a fun conversation.” Audrey sighed, still surprised by the visceral nature of the kill. It hadn’t been Summer’s intention, and Audrey knew that, but it made the untrained women that much more dangerous if they didn’t know their own strength.
Hound peered down at her and tucked a stray strand of hair behind her ear. “It’s good to see you up and about again.”
She turned into his embrace and rested her head on her chest. “It’s good to be back.”
He didn’t have to say the rest. She could feel how worried he’d been, and how careful he was being now. They stood there for a few moments, letting the power of the mark do
their talking for them. Eventually he pulled away, pressing a kiss to her forehead before letting her go.
“I’d better go tell Ace before someone else does.”
“Mmm,” she agreed. The women had returned to their tasks, but the mood had changed. Gone was any trace of joviality, and in its place, a grim purpose. Well, I certainly know how to lighten things up, don’t I? Maybe we should call it a day.
She turned, looking for Amelina. The woman was normally around, especially during training sessions, but for some reason, Audrey couldn’t find her. Looking back up to the wall, the world tilted and seemed to slip out from under her feet. She felt the impact as she fell, but her eyes saw something else entirely.
Without ever consciously entering a trance, she found herself seeing in the language of the trees, that confusing array of sensations over bark that could be loosely interpreted to images and impressions. Only, this was no Grove she’d ever been in herself. There seemed to be only a single tree, with various other plants nearby. What was clear, radiating like a miniature sun, was the form of a young woman. She was in absolute agony, the tree pulling the life force from her inch by inch.
“Lily,” she panted, the tie to her physical form scarcely there. She heard alarmed voices, someone calling for a medic, but her vision remained trained on Lily, dying alone in a Grove of a single tree.
Where? Where is she? She’d been to every Grove, knew most of the Guardians, even those who slept, but this place was alien to her. She cried out mentally, reaching out to the nearest Grove, desperate. Communication with the Groves was haphazard at best, and despite all her inquiries, the only thing she had was a direction: south.
“Audrey!” Hound’s gravelly voice was rough, desperate, but it finally reached her.
She gasped, sucking in air like she’d been deprived. Her vision blurred, and it took Audrey a moment to realize it was from tears. She tried to speak, but found her voice hoarse, as if she’d been screaming. “Lily--”
“Let me through.”
She knew that voice. That was Deuce. I don’t need help. Lily, she needs help. She needs me. She tried to fight her way to her feet, but too many hands were holding her down.
“Let me go!” She pushed, to no avail. She threw herself back into her trance, activating seeds within the soil. If they wouldn’t let her go, she’d fight her way free.
Hound’s voice was fuzzy at best. “Everyone clear out, she’s trying to fight us. Deuce, can you sedate her?”
“Not until I know what’s going on.” A hand landed on her calf, but all the others had withdrawn. “Audrey, what are you seeing?”
“South. She’s in the south, far south. She’s dying,” her voice hitched up an octave on the last word. She was desperate, forcing herself into a seated position despite the circle of alarmed people staring at her. Lily had minutes to live, at best, and they all wanted to talk about it first.
“Audrey, I need more than that. Let me in, let me try and figure out--” Hound’s words were cut off.
“I’ll take her.” Deuce’s tone was strangled, and Audrey looked at him for the first time. He was suddenly deathly pale, and looked as if he’d seen a ghost.
“You know where she is?” She fought her way to her feet with strength she didn’t know she possessed.
“You’ll have to follow us.” Deuce was speaking to Hound, who began barking out orders she couldn’t process. In the blink of an eye, the entire scene vanished.
Chapter Thirty-One
What the fuck. He didn’t have time for questions. Hound barked out orders.
“Jasper, get back to the Institute and bring a minimum of one full squad with you, get more if you can. Phase back here, and track us in.” He turned to the Seekers that had been on the wall. “You lot, with me, now.” He didn’t even double check their connections, throwing himself into his tracking sight and following Deuce’s trail.
They arrived in time to see Deuce and Audrey on some kind of-- the fuck? Is that a giant... lizard? He didn’t have time to question it as the beast shot its legs out to the side and jumped straight down a big-assed hole in the top of the mountain they’d landed on. A man fought his way to his feet, apparently the former rider of the beast in question. He started trying to phase, but Hound threw himself into the magnetic patterns of the area, manipulating them to keep him locked in position.
“Can we phase down?”
The man stared at him with wide eyes.
Hound stalked over to him and dragged him up to his feet by his collar. “Answer me, damn it. Can we phase down?”
The man stammered. “Th-th-the new men can’t. I-I-I don’t know if you can or not.”
Hound released his grip only slightly. “Can you?”
The man nodded vigorously.
“Good. We’ll follow.”
He looked intensely confused, but as Hound dropped the magnetic interference, he vanished. Hound verified the trail led where they wanted to go and extended a hand back to his emergency team. As soon as the connections were made, he spirited them down to the floor of the cavern, at least a mile down. Deuce was just helping Audrey off the lizard. As soon as her feet touched the ground, she sprinted toward a rise not far from where they’d landed. Screams filled the air, and Hound realized with horror that Lily was standing on that rise. She was the source of the screams.
“Catch me!”
Hound acted on instinct, phasing to Audrey’s side as she fled her body, catching her as she fell. He forced his sight into the vision he used only rarely now, the same sight he’d used to discover her in the first place. Her essence flew faster than feet could ever carry her toward the Grove. She wrapped herself around Lily, and that’s where his vision failed him. All he saw was white; nothing was distinct anymore.
Any relief at finding her was immediately dashed as Audrey realized what exactly the Grove was doing to her. Gwyn’s words echoed in her mind. If she steps foot in a Grove, it’ll be a death sentence.
Instinct guided her and she shielded her daughter in her own energy. The pain was exquisite, moving beyond words or sounds capable of expressing it, but this was her daughter. She would not relent.
You can’t have her. It was more of a statement, a declaration to allow her to hold strong. The last thing she’d expected was a response.
Her life belongs to the Groves. It must be. The voice was a low, rumbling sensation that took a long time to finish its words in her mind. The assault lessened, but Audrey got the sense it was more of a pause than an actual cease fire.
Why her life? Why does it have to be her?
Hers is the life that was saved. Hers is the life that is owed.
Desperation made Audrey reckless. No. My life was the one that was saved by the Groves. My children were saved as a consequence.
The attack ceased entirely. Through her connection, Audrey felt the most curious thing. This tree, this one-tree Grove, seemed to be communicating with all the Groves she knew. The loudest voice came from the Grove in Amberfoot, the one Audrey had been taken to when she’d almost lost her life to the dose of the taint.
The Guardian is not clear. A life was given, and a life must be returned.
A life. Not her life, but a life. Audrey didn’t give it a second thought. Can you restore her? If I agree to give you a life, can you restore to her what was taken?
The tree took some time to confer with the other Groves. It seemed to take hours, but could have been seconds. Yes.
Then restore her, and you shall have your life.
She could sense the grumbling nature of the Grove, but it relented. Unshield her.
Nothing good had ever happened to Audrey by allowing her shields to drop in a Grove. The Guardian in Amberfoot had taken it as an opportunity to possess her body and force her into the Grove in her stead. Somehow, Audrey was aware that this Grove didn’t have the strength to do that. Hesitantly, she unwrapped herself from Lily’s core energy.
White energy, what she could only assume was Lily’s lif
e force, returned to her, trickling at first, and then flowing freely. Audrey waited, desperate for any sign of change in her daughter. At long last, it came.
Mother? The thought was weak, but it was there.
I thought I’d never see you again. She wanted to wrap her arms around her and never let her go, but while Lily’s physical form was here, hers was not.
The grating tones of the Grove interrupted them. A life was promised. A life must be given.
A life? Mom, what’s he talking about? Lily’s panic was obvious.
Audrey could feel the Grove’s impatience. She didn’t have much time. A Guardian saved my life when I was pregnant with you. As a result, you bore a mark that demanded your life if you ever stepped foot in a Grove. I was trying to protect you, but I should have told you. She would be weeping, and for all she knew, her physical body might be doing it all the same. She gathered her resolve as Lily tried to process the revelation.
Alarm flared through the mark that she bore even outside of her body. Hound would interfere, try and stop her, but this was the only way. She had to move quickly. Lily, I have to go now.
What? It only took her a beat to catch on. Mom, no. You can’t.
A life.
Great energies began to stir around them, and Audrey pushed against Lily, trying to force her to move. Tell Hound that I love him, and I always will. Tell Brana I’m sorry. And your brother, she fished for the words, tell him I’m sorry I’m abandoning him again.
Mom, please. Don’t leave me. You can’t leave me.
I’ve lived my life, Lily. You still have so much of your own to live. The Grove was getting more agitated by the second. She was out of time. I love you. Don’t forget--
Agitation and urgency had been building through the mark. Hound had never gotten any feedback through it when she was connected with a Grove before, and the fact that whatever was happening in there was strong enough to reach him through her shielding scared the shit out of him. Hound stared at her limp body in his arms, measuring every breath, watching the flare of her nostrils like his life depended on the action.