by N. Raines
Cam looped his arm around Layla's shoulders and tugged her close. "Red, this is my friend Layla."
Red's eyes widened and he looked grateful for the chance to change the awkward topic. "Hey. Hi. Layla, is it?"
She nodded. Her smile felt wooden. "Yes. Hi."
"Well, listen, man. Really good to see you. Seriously, come say hello to Deb and Kiki. They'd love to see you."
Layla stood silently while Cam ordered their hot cocoas. She pulled some bills from her pocket to pay for her drink, but he stopped her. "I've got this." He handed her the insulated cup. "Here you go."
"Thanks," she murmured. Though the drink smelled delicious, suddenly she'd lost the taste for it.
As they headed back to the picnic tables, Cam said "Red's an old friend from school. Deb's his wife and Kiki is their little girl."
"Oh." Layla was ashamed of the relief that washed over her. "That's nice."
But who was Paige?
"They're right over there." He nodded at Red's little family, sitting not far away. "Listen, would you mind if I…"
"No, go over and say hi," she told him. "I'll hold your cocoa."
He handed her his cup. "Thanks a lot."
She watched him clap Red on the back, kiss the cheek of the brunette woman seated next to him, and smile at the little girl sitting next to her mom. The child, who looked to be five or six and a redhead like her dad, launched herself into Cam's arms. He threw his head back, laughing as he gave her a hug.
Aww. Layla's heart melted. So cute.
After a few words to her parents, Cam lowered Kiki to the ground, gently took her hand, and led her out onto the rink. Hand in hand, they circled the ice. After one complete turn, he returned the little girl to her parents. They chatted a bit longer. Then he waved good-bye and skated back to Layla.
"That was nice," she remarked as he lowered himself beside her.
A flush colored his cheeks. "She's a cute kid." He took the cup she handed him.
They sipped their cocoa in companionable silence. Layla tried not to let her thoughts dwell on Paige, whoever she was. To distract herself, she gestured toward the skaters young and old gliding by on the ice. "They make it look so easy."
"Lots of things look easy. Let me ask you a question. When a kid comes to you whining that the assignment is too hard or they can't figure out their homework, do you tell him, 'Oh, that's okay, Jimmy. If it's too hard, don't bother. Just forget the homework.'"
She gave him a withering look. "Don't be silly. Of course not."
"Right. You work with him. Ask him what he doesn't understand. Go over it with him until you're sure he gets it. You don't let him give up."
She held back a sigh. "I have a feeling you're working up to something."
"Yeah, I am. Following your example, I'd be a pretty lousy teacher if I let you give up."
"I'm not giving up." Being compared to a whiny schoolkid wasn't a compliment. "And I don't whine."
He stared out at the ice rink. "Okay." He took a sip, swallowed, then began to murmur in a high, crybaby voice, "Wah, my legs feel like spaghetti. I can't lift my feet, I'm gonna fall. Don't go so fast. You're going too fast, you'll make me fall."
She gave him a shot with her elbow. "Teachers are supposed to encourage their students, doofus. Not make fun of them."
He huffed a laugh. "You got me there. Okay, no more teasing. But you gotta promise you'll keep trying."
She smiled. "I promise."
It was so nice, joking around with Cam and hanging out. Just because they'd hooked up in the past didn't mean they couldn't be friends. Though Cam had indicated he'd be just fine adding "benefits" to the mix, Layla had no intention of letting that happen. First of all, Drew was in her life now. Second, Layla knew she couldn't be that casual about sex with Cam. She liked him too much. It wouldn't be hard for her to develop deeper feelings for him.
Not because he was hot, though of course he was. His thick, wavy head of hair made her want to run her fingers through it. His hazel eyes brimmed with mischief, and just a glance from him could send a tingle through her. More than that, he was smart, ambitious, and a genuinely good guy. It would be so easy to fall for him.
And what would Drew say if he knew all that? Maybe he'd want you to stop seeing him. Isn't that why you've kept your friendship on the low? Because you don't want to take that chance?
Luckily, Cam had no inkling of the thoughts running through her mind. "Speaking of teaching," he said, "how's the job coming along?"
He was referring to her current substitute position, filling in for a teacher on maternity leave. "Oh, it's good. The kids are great. The other teachers have been amazing. It's so nice going to the same class every day, not having to wonder what school I'll be in, what grade, what subject I'll have to teach."
"It's first grade, right?"
"Yeah. From what they tell me, I'll be there till the end of the year."
"That's awesome."
She spent a few more minutes talking about the class and a couple of funny incidents involving her students. Then he told her about the latest happenings at the Shamrock, the bar his family owned and where he worked. His face lit up as he regaled her with plans for their big St. Patrick's celebration.
When they finished their drinks, he checked her laces, tightened them, and took her back onto the ice. They resumed skating as they'd done before, Cam skating backward in front of her, holding her hands.
The first time around the rink, he ordered, "Chin up. Look where you're going, not down at your feet."
The second time around: "Bend your knees. You're too stiff."
The third time: "That's it. You're doing fine. I'm gonna let go now. Keep going. You can do it."
"No, don't let me go. I'll fall." Her fingers became pincers as she refused to let go of his hands.
"Then fall like I showed you." That had been their first lesson, learning how to fall without landing on her face or spraining a wrist. "You'll be fine."
Mercilessly, he loosened her grip and drifted away. She was on her own. All the rules raced through her head, all the things he'd taught her. Don't hunch forward, keep your knees bent, lift your feet…
Her ankles buckled. Her knees wobbled. She was going to fall! Remembering something else he'd taught her, Layla thrust her arms out at her sides to regain her balance. She straightened up and relief rushed through her. She grinned at Cam. She was doing it! She was skating all on her own!
Cam grinned back, his face aglow with pride.
Suddenly a little kid whizzed in front of her. She startled reflexively and threw up her hands as she lost her balance. She was going down.
"Dip!" Cam hollered, bending his knees low, reminding her how. Layla bent just before she toppled over, then flopped down hard on her butt. Ouch. As the other skaters glided past, she maneuvered to her hands and knees to lever herself up.
Cam swooped over to her and helped her stand. "You did great!"
She grimaced, rubbing her backside. "I fell on my ass."
"Hey, everybody falls. You fell good. You remembered everything I told you." Cam slipped his arm around her waist. "I'm proud of you."
That pride, and the snug feel of his arm around her, sent warmth spinning through her. Uh-oh.
None of that. Remember Drew. He'll be waiting for you.
This time Layla was grateful her pesky conscience spoke up. Remember Drew. And remember Cam was firmly in the friend zone. She'd placed him there with good reason.
Her smile felt as wobbly as her ankles. "On that note, I think I should be getting back home."
Cam blinked, the light dimming in his hazel eyes, his expression growing serious. "All right. Just one more spin around the ice."
"Okay. Once more around."
They skated together, Cam beside her this time while she concentrated on keeping her knees bent and chin up, watching where she was going. She wasn't quite so scared this time. If she fell, hey, everybody fell. She'd get back up again. And Cam would be right
there, helping her.
"Yay, we made it!" she crowed as they reached the tent area and sat down.
"Never a doubt in my mind," Cam said.
Layla sighed. "This was fun. Thanks a lot."
"You bet. You did great." He cocked his head. "So…next Saturday, same time, same place?"
"Absolutely." She was champing at the bit, anticipating her next lesson. Soon she'd be leaving those little kids in the dust.
Her enthusiasm sputtered when she remembered Drew. It wasn't fair to keep him in the dark about her skating dates with Cam, even though they were perfectly innocent.
Cam picked up on her change of expression. "What's the matter?"
She gazed at him. "I told you I've been seeing someone."
He nodded. "Yeah, I remember." His response was clipped, perfunctory. He sounded almost annoyed, as though he didn't like thinking of her with another guy. But that was crazy. Cam was an amazingly hot dude who served drinks to cute college girls five nights a week. He was up to his neck in women. No way would he care who Layla dated.
His eyebrows lowered. "What's the problem? This guy doesn't want you seeing me? He won't let you have friends?"
"He doesn't know about you," she answered quickly. Too quickly. Crap. She hadn't meant it to come out like that.
"Oh." That gave him pause. His eyes narrowed. "So, I'm…what? Your dirty little secret?"
"Nothing like that. We haven't discussed it." She stared down at her laces. "It's not like he's told me all about his friends." Though he'd mentioned the guys he played ball with—Ryan and Tony and a guy they all for some reason called Fuzzy.
"Well, we're not doing anything shady," Cam said. She could feel him watching her, assessing her. Her face grew hot with shame. He was right about her keeping him secret, and that wasn't fair. To him or to Drew.
"I know. And it's not like Drew and I have even…" Whoa. Stop there, girl. TMI.
But Cam connected the dots. "You haven't hooked up yet?"
Layla cut her eyes left and right to check no one could overhear. "No."
"Really?" An expression washed over his face, a pleased look that came and went in a flash. "How long you and Romeo been seeing each other?"
"Shush, don't call him that. His name is Drew. And it's been two months." She hesitated. "Two and a half."
"Huh. So what's the deal, he can't get it up?"
"Shush! It's not that. We're taking it slow. Taking our time." At least, she hoped so. Was it possible Drew just didn't want her? Didn't think she was sexy enough? They'd made out plenty of times, but had always drawn back before going too far. Actually, she was the one who put on the brakes, but Drew never pushed. She always figured it was because he respected her. But maybe he wasn't really into her?
Cam gave a snort of disbelief. "Two and a half months, shit, that's more than enough time to know whether you want to tear up the sheets. What's wrong with him?"
"Nothing's wrong with him!" She chewed her lip, realizing something for the first time. "Maybe I'm the problem."
Cam's reply was short and emphatic. "Nah. No way."
"Really. I'm the one who's been dragging my heels. I just figured that out."
"How come?"
"I don't know."
"He doesn't turn you on?"
"Yeah, he does." She thought of their kiss outside the coffeehouse and remembered how it had warmed her down to her toes.
But it wasn't like the blaze she'd experienced with Cam.
There you go again, comparing the two of them. What's the point?
Yes, she and Cam had enjoyed two hot hookups. Sex with him had been like a sheet of flame, flaring up, consuming her, and burning out. Her attraction to Drew felt like glowing coals that could be fed to maintain a steady, long-burning fire.
Her thing with Cam had been intense, but could never be sustained.
Oh, get over yourself. You put Cam in the friend zone, but he never asked to be anywhere else, did he? Sure, he'd be happy enough to get busy now and then, but he's never shown any interest in having a serious romance with you.
Why should he? He was young, horny, and free. He had too many options, too many girls hitting on him. She would never feel completely at ease. She and Drew could build something together. With him, there was a chance for a future.
"I know what your problem is, little Layla."
Cam's unexpected remark startled her. She'd been so mired in her dilemma, she'd forgotten he was right there beside her. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. Same old song. You're overthinking it."
He'd told her that once before, when she'd been struggling with the decision to get with him the first time. "You think?"
"Oh, yeah." He folded his arms across his middle and leaned back, his expression so smug she wanted to kick him. "You're going round and round in your head. What if I do this, what if he wants that, what'll happen if I…" He puffed a sound of disgust and flicked his fingers to show what he thought of her doubts. "The hell with it. Stop futzing around. You know what you want. Go for it."
Was it really that easy?
He plowed ahead, steamrolling her uncertainty. "Listen, I know who I'm talking to. Underneath that proper little schoolteacher veneer is a wild woman. I got the scratches on my back to prove it."
The remark was so casually inappropriate, she burst out laughing. "Be quiet. I never scratched you."
He gave her an alligator grin, all teeth. "Claw marks, baby. You were Sheena, Queen of the Jungle!"
Recalling that time, a thrill zinged through her. A sexual thrill that swirled in her belly and warmed parts lower down, creating an ache so intense she bit her lip to stifle a moan. So wrong in this place, with parents and their little kids skating by, innocently enjoying the day.
She swatted him with her glove, punishing him for putting her in this predicament. "Stop. You're out of control."
"No. You were out of control." He grew serious. "Really. If you want the guy, make your move. You sure weren't shy with me."
No, she hadn't been. Not once they got started, and certainly not their second time, when she practically dragged him into the storeroom of the Shamrock.
She stared at him. Make your move. What if she made a move right now, grabbed Cam, and planted a big, wet one on him, right in front of everybody?
And make a fool of yourself? Are you crazy? You'll never be enough for Cam. And hello, have you forgotten about Drew?
Drew. Smart, sweet Drew, who was perfect for her. What was she waiting for? Some bolt of lightning to hit her? Some message written in the sky saying He's the one? Why was she sitting here fantasizing about Cam, who was all wrong?
She and Cam could never be more than friends. Anything else would lead to heartbreak—her heartbreak.
But he spoke the truth about her dithering, not making up her mind. She was standing in her own way. Holding on to those flimsy dreams of Cam might lose her the chance of happiness with Drew. "You're absolutely right."
"Hell, yeah, I'm right. So what are you waiting for? Get your ass in gear and give the poor guy some."
Instead of the lip-lock she'd imagined moments before, she gave Cam a quick peck on the cheek.
He blinked. "What's that for?"
"For being so smart, and giving me such good advice."
His expression softened. He placed his hand on his cheek, as though he wanted to capture her kiss and save it. "You're welcome. So I take it you're going to follow my words of wisdom."
She bent to unfasten her skates. A new confidence filled her. No more stalling with Drew. It was up to her to make the first move. "You bet I am. As soon as I wrestle myself out of these skates."
****
Layla drove home, invigorated by a sense of purpose. All her indecision was gone. She was going to go to bed with Drew. Tell him how much she cared for him. And she was going to tell him about Cam.
She wasn't afraid anymore, because she had faith in Drew. He wouldn't ask her to give up Cam's friendship. He'd know there was nothing for
him to worry about. He'd trust her, just the way she trusted him.
As she climbed the stairs to her apartment, she realized she hadn't thought to look for his car in the parking lot. Maybe he wasn't here yet. That would give her time to straighten up a bit and maybe change. Take off her skating gear—leggings and a lumpy sweater—and get into "something more comfortable."
She snorted at the phrase, as it recalled scenes from old movies where the actress uttering the line would later emerge in some filmy negligee. Layla owned no filmy negligees. Still, she could come up with something a little sexy, something that whispered, Come and get me, big boy.
There was no need to fish the key out of her purse because her door was already unlocked. When she walked in, she found Drew standing in the living room, his back to her, toweling his damp hair. "Hey."
He turned quickly, his eyes wide and startled, his mouth agape. "Uh…hey. Why you here?"
She gave a small laugh as she tossed her purse on the sofa and shrugged out of her jacket. "I live here, remember?"
He cleared his throat. "Sure. I just thought you'd be gone longer."
She smiled and kept her voice low. "I wanted to get home to you." Though he was completely dressed, his feet were bare. "You showered, huh?"
He looked away, as though embarrassed. "Yeah. Uh, I got sweaty during the game, so…"
"That's fine," she answered, not wanting him to feel uncomfortable. She glided over to him, laid her hand on his soft flannel shirt. "I wish you'd waited for me, though. I would have liked to join you." She stood on her toes and gave him a soft kiss.
Yes! Her libido pumped its fist. You go, girl!
Drew didn't return the kiss, just stood like a monolith. Layla sank back on her heels in disappointment and confusion. Had she done something wrong? Misread his feelings for her? Turned him off?
But what she saw in his face was not disgust, not indifference, but fear.
She glanced past him and her gaze landed on the armchair, where another purse, another jacket lay. A red jacket. For a moment Layla couldn't connect the dots.
The bedroom door opened and out walked Jessi, pulling down her sleeves. "Hi, Layla."
Layla stepped back. Her gaze swung from Jessi to Drew, whose face was bright red.