by Thia Finn
Hayden joined the celebration, too. The band had adopted him as a mascot over the past week since he was always around and seemed eager to help out. Ryan was going to let his new-found cousin stay in his apartment for the three months the band was on the road, which would work out great for them both.
Ryan learned from Cash that he was already lining up performances at bars and clubs all over Austin for Hayden, as well as setting him up with time in the studio to lay tracks for some iTunes singles. Ryan was happy when Cash told him he believed Hayden had several songs written with great potential and wanted him to cut a CD with all of his music as quickly as it could happen.
The week was nerve-wracking for everyone, and Krissy seemed to be the one most on edge. After agreeing to take the part of Peri’s job as a receptionist, she found out she couldn’t start at 13 Recordings until the same Monday the band flew out. All of this was making her nervous. Peri brought in a temp to take her spot while she did her new job, and the temp would teach Krissy, who prayed the temp listened and took good notes.
Krissy’s nerves were on edge being around Ryan and the rest of AD who all seemed like it was such a great thing to be leaving for three months. She fidgeted with irritation, turning her phone over and over, again and again in her hands, when it vibrated in her palm. “OMG, it’s him.” She jumped up from the booth, with Ryan on her heels, and ran out the door to talk to her landlord. “Yes, this is Krissy.”
“Okay, I see,” she replied flatly after listening for a few minutes, her face devoid of expression making Ryan even more nervous.
“Yes, I know. You’re right. I’ll come by in the morning then.” Ryan knew it wasn’t going to be good.
She hung up the phone. “Shit, shit, shit. What in the hell am I going to do? He says I have to move out. Thank God he’s not kicking my roommate out, too, but where the hell am I supposed to go? I can’t afford a decent apartment in Austin without a roommate. I don’t even know if I want to live alone.” Ryan saw the fire in her eyes. He knew this wasn’t going to play out well for him.
“And you! Damn you, Ryan! Everything going wrong is your fucking fault. You did this to me, and now you get to hop on a plane in two days and leave me alone here, high and dry!” She was to the point of screaming now, unleashing her pent-up anxiety and frustration.
“Krissy, we’ll figure something out.” He needed to calm her down.
“Yeah, right. You can start with going over there and paying for the damages you caused, because I’m sure as hell not going to, nor do I have the damn money,” she barked.
Ryan stood and took her jabbing him in the chest with her stiletto-sharp nails that she’d had done at the spa with his money. He needed to say the right things, especially now.
“Right, no problem, and I’ll pay to have you moved, too. It’s going to be alright, baby,” he reassured her as he tried to grab her wrist to stop the poking.
“Damn right, you will move me, and I want someone to pack it and unpack it, as well. I’m not lifting a damn finger. And when that’s all done, I never want to see your sorry ass again. EVER!” she yelled. “Go to Europe with your little fucking boy band and don’t ever contact me again. Do you understand me?”
Ryan gasped. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “Now, wait, Krissy. You don’t mean that. I love you.”
“No, you don’t. You love the band, you love the fame, and the attention from those fanwhores, and the traveling, and ‘the music’, but you don’t love me!”
“You’re wrong; I do love you.” He couldn’t come up with the right words to convince her.
“No, Ryan, you do not love me. If you did, you wouldn’t enjoy spending so much time away. You would give up this band dream and get a real job so we could be together.”
“A REAL job? What the fuck, Krissy? The band is my dream job. I’ve been working my ass off, living poor, working odd jobs, playing in smoky bars for years trying to make it. Now that I have, you want me to walk away? If you loved me at all, you would want me to do what I love, and you’d celebrate my successes with me, not brush off my dreams as an inconvenience.” Ryan was yelling right along with her now until he noticed heads turning and staring at the scene they were making.
“I’m leaving. When you come home from Europe, I will not be here waiting.”
Ryan stared at her for a long minute before letting out an exasperated sigh. “Krissy, I know you don’t mean that. You’re angry right now, and I get it, but we love each other. I don’t want to see things left unsettled while I’m gone. I thought maybe you would go ahead and move into my apartment while I’m gone. We should have moved in together before I left the first time. The rent’s paid and there’s another bedroom for Hayden. I will have the door repaired. I know it’s not perfect, but you’ll have a good place to live, and I won’t have to worry about you living alone.”
He had never mentioned them moving in together before. Maybe this idea would placate her until he could get back and figure things out.
She softly laid her hand in the middle of his chest. It was a familiar touch to her, and one Ryan had been seeking since returning to her. “Ryan, I know this is hard for you. It’s hard on both of us, but I need to know I am as important to you as this band. With you willing to leave me without a thought as to how it effects me, it makes me feel unimportant to you.”
“Kitten, you are important to me, and what I’m doing ensures we will have a great life.”
She tightened the material of his shirt front bringing them closer together. “Babe, take me home. I hate that all we’ve done is fight since you’ve been here. I need to know you love me like you say you do.”
He pulled her closer and kissed her. He decided maybe they were getting somewhere, finally but wasn’t quite sure with her about face all of a sudden.
Ryan dressed to leave the next morning quickly, knowing he had a lot to do before flying out. He leaned in to give Krissy a kiss and tried not to wake her.
“Where are you off to so early, Babe?” Her voice was thick with sleep.
“Kitten, I have so much to do today. I need an early start to finish it all.” He rushed around the room finishing up to leave.
“Like what? I thought we could enjoy the morning a little longer.” Her sex-tousled hair and heavy-lidded eyes were enough to make him want to jump back in with her, but he knew if he did, he would never get finished in time to leave.
“I still have to pack. I want to get over to your apartment to take care of the door and then see to having your stuff moved. I need to get all of my guitars ready to go. There’s a lot of things that need to be done.”
She came straight up to her knees on the bed. “What?” she screeched.
He spun around taking in her nakedness. “What do you mean, what? You know I need to get finished.”
“You mean after last night, you still plan to go?” Her voice escalated with each word.
“Yes, Krissy. You know I would never change my mind. I thought we had this worked out already.” He couldn’t believe what he was hearing from her.
“If you go, we’re done Ryan.” She laid down the ultimatum from last night.
“Krissy, I’m going. I want you to think hard about what you are saying and while I’m gone come to your senses about us.”
“Fuck you, Ryan.”
“No, Krissy, you’ve done that already, and look where that got me.” He spun around and slammed the door behind him.
She leaped from the bed stomped and thrashed, screaming and growling her frustration. She had to make some quick decisions or she was going to find herself homeless in a week.
The landlord had agreed to let the roommate stay if she left ASAP. Possibilities were popping in and out of her mind on her way back to her apartment. At least, her landlord gave her a week to move. When she put her key in the door, her roommate yanked it open.
“The landlord came by and told me the decision. Oh, Krissy, what are you going to do? Finding a new place in a week is going
to be impossible.”
“No, I’ve already decided. Ryan told me he was going to ask me to move into his place. There’s the extra bedroom there, the rent’s paid for three months while he’s gone, and now all I have to do is convince Hayden not to tell Ryan.” The ride in the cab gave her time to think of a plan, and this plan would save her a lot of money she would probably need when he returned.
“Why wouldn’t you tell him? I’m sure he would be happy to help you move. You don’t have much stuff and only your bedroom furniture, so it won’t take much for him and the guys to move it all.”
“Yeah, well, I kinda told him to fuck off. I can’t take playing second fiddle to his stupid band anymore. He’s coming here to pay for the door, and he’s paying to have me packed and moved. I’ll wait until he’s on his plane to God knows where and then I’ll move into his place. If he’s gonna fuck me over, he, at least, can take care of me while he’s out of the country.”
“I don’t know Krissy; that’s kinda ballsy on your part to take over his apartment without him knowing.”
“You’re right, but he owes me. He’s leaving me, and he got me evicted. And besides, he offered it to me, so I’m taking it. I just didn’t tell him I would. He never has to know. He won’t be home for three long months and by then, I’ll have money saved and plenty of damn time to find my own place.
“I’m taking a shower. It’s going to be a long day with all I have to get done.” She turned with purpose and walked into her bedroom, passed the splintered door hanging off its hinges in the broken doorframe. She was so pissed at Ryan, and she wanted to cause him the same pain, no – more pain – than she felt at being pushed aside for his foolish ambitions. Aside from shutting him out of her life, the only way she could think of to get back at him was to take advantage of his generosity and stupidity. And she decided she was going to do just that.
She could live with Hayden. He’s new to Austin; she could help him get to know his way around for the next few months. She had it all settled in her mind and had justified moving into Ryan’s place on Tuesday. She felt better with a plan.
“Pour him into the passenger’s side and I’ll get him to the apartment,” Hayden told the guys. “I can get him to his bed by myself. Damn, I’m glad we don’t live upstairs.” The band met up at the bar where Hayden was performing to support him while they were still in town. Ryan downed a lot of beer and tequila shots during the evening intending to drink Krissy off his mind.
“I don’t wanna go home without my Kitten.” Ryan’s drunken whining had caused everyone to tire of him quickly. He spent the day getting ready to leave but the longer he went through the preparations, the more upset he became. By the time he reached Red 7, he was ready to drown with the worm at the bottom of the bottle.
Gunner grabbed him around the waist and hauled him to the side of the truck. “Shut the fuck up, Ryan. We’ve already heard this for three damn hours. Your little Kitty doesn’t want to play anymore. Stop being a pussy now and take it like a man.”
Peri slapped Gunner’s arm. “Quit being mean to him. He’s heartbroken.”
“Oh shit, Gunner, we don’t know what to do with a broken heart, do we? That is exactly why we say ‘fuck it and chuck it.’ None of this kind of’ shit to deal with.” Carter started laughing.
“That’s so crude, Carter.” Peri glared at him.
“It may be crude, but it’s the truth. All you women ever want is some kind of ball-busting relationship. Me and Gunner say, ‘hit it and quit it’, ‘pump and dump’, ‘one and done’…”
“That’s enough,” KeeMac stepped in. “He can’t even understand what y’all are saying, and these girls don’t think your words of wisdom are all that wise, so shut the fuck up.”
“All I’m saying is if y’all wouldn’t find yourselves tied down, you would never run into shit like this.” Carter was getting on Peri’s last nerve.
“You want me to ride home with you to help out, Hayden?” Peri volunteered.
“No, I got this. He’ll be fine. I’ll make sure he doesn’t choke or anything.” The image he conjured up for the rest of them wasn’t pretty. Hayden got behind the wheel, ready to drive away and realized being eighteen had its advantages since he wasn’t drinking with them tonight.
Dragging Ryan inside the apartment woke him up, and he started crying like a baby over Krissy but by the time Hayden dumped him into the middle of his bed and pulled off his boots, he was snoring. Hayden’s last thought was to roll him on his side in case he threw up.
“Dude, I’ll check on you in a little while. Please don’t throw up in this bed because I intend to sleep in it while you’re gone, and vomit pillows don’t sing ‘Home Sweet Home.’” He offered up a silent prayer that Ryan didn’t get sick since he would not be able to clean Ryan up without throwing up himself.
The sun hit him in the face, and Ryan looked around the room trying to recall how he’d gotten to his bed. The nightmare from last night slowly crawled to the forefront of his brain about the same time as the pain. He hated being hungover but to be hungover, pissed, and heartbroken all at the same time was too much. He needed to talk to Krissy and wondered if his phone made the trip home with him. Unable to locate it, he ventured into the living room wondering who or what he would find there. He was greeted by the wonderful aroma of coffee when he opened his door.
“Well, you did survive. We all had our doubts last night.” Gunner was sitting at the bar talking to Hayden, who was cooking bacon.
“I figured you could use something greasy to cure the hangover.” Hayden smiled, remembering how gone Ryan had been last night. “I have some pain meds, too.” He handed a cup of coffee and an ibuprofen bottle to Ryan, followed by a plate of bacon and some toast.
“Thanks, man.” After swallowing the medicine and a big gulp of hot coffee, he looked around the apartment. “I guess I didn’t dream all of that last night since Krissy wasn’t in my bed this morning.”
“Nope, the bitch is gone,” Gunner answered.
“Don’t call her that. She’s my girlfriend.”
“No, dude, she’s not. In case you don’t remember, before you got wasted and forgot how to make your tongue work, you told us she said she was done with your sorry ass.”
“Man, you shoot for the juggler, don’t you?” Hayden stared at Gunner. “He not even awake yet.”
“It’s all the truth, though. Why dance around it? Better to just get it out.” Gunner shrugged his shoulders.
“I need to talk to her.”
“Oh, no asshat. You do not need to do that. Leave her the fuck alone. You have things to do today before we fly out of here.”
“Yeah, I have to agree with Gunner,” Hayden nodded. “From what you told us last night, she pretty much laid it out pretty plain for you.”
“But I got her evicted. She has nowhere to move and only has a week. I even told her she could move in my spare bedroom.”
“Apparently, you only remember some of what she said. She started talking shit and told you to fuck off.”
Gunner couldn’t believe he had been so generous to her when she had rained hatred all over his head with the verbiage about the band and Ryan’s dreams.
“Yeah, I don’t think that’s a great plan. I don’t want to have to deal with her every day.” Hayden was now praying she forgot about Ryan’s offer and was on the hunt for another place. “I already have to see her at the studio.”
“I’ll just let it ride while I’m gone. I’m sure she’ll miss me, and we’ll get things worked out when she’s had time to calm down.”
The guys did not bring the problem up again. Everyone needed to take their things to the office for loading on the truck and delivering to the airport. Ryan decided to go back to bed for a while, so Gunner left to do his own thing. Hayden was glad they were finally leaving since he would have the day to himself. He wanted nothing more than to lay back, and play some video games or guitar, and work on some new songs. That was relaxing to him.
“Look guys, I appreciate you trying to cheer me up or whatever, but I’m fine.” Ryan decided to get it out in the open before they climbed on the plane. “We will get this worked out when I get home. She’ll come around.”
“Is that what you fucking want after the way she bitched you out like that?” Carter couldn’t believe he would even consider it.
“Well, you know, Ryan, she disrespected the band pretty badly last night during her little tirade. I don’t know that I’ll ever look at her the same way.” KeeMac added to the conversation. “If I didn’t know better, I would swear she’s been spending time with Janae and the two of them have been plotting against you and the band while we were gone. With the way Janae fucked Jacoby over, she’s probably been coaching Krissy on exactly what buttons to push to bring you around.”
From the other side of his truck, Gunner joined in. “Yeah. That shit really pissed me off when she started in about our ‘boy band status.’ Our music sure as hell is not boy band music. If we were, neither Frission nor Steel would want us. Those two little bitches don’t know what they are talking about. We’ve been working on this dream for a long time and for the two of them to burn us with their fucked up ideas pisses me off.”
“I know what she was saying was wrong, but she was mad at me, not y’all. I made a mess of things when I should have put her first. I caused this. All I want now is for her to love me like she did before. That’s it, and it’ll happen.” He turned and climbed in his truck to move it so Hayden could take it home. He didn’t want to talk anymore. He did what they asked and needed to end this conversation. What he wanted to do was talk to Krissy, to know she was alright and was going to be fine while he was gone. He couldn’t believe they would be separated for three months with things up in the air like this.