by Kayla Perrin
“Why don’t you ask the guy you were at breakfast with? From what I heard of your conversation, he’ll probably be upset to see you out on a kayak with me.”
“Edward is one of Roy’s cousins, and he’s just a friend.”
“You were talking about how many children you wanted.”
“I wasn’t talking about that. Edward was. Obviously, he has a crush on me.”
“You looked pretty cozy to me.”
“Looks can be deceiving. There is nothing going on between Edward and me. In fact, after you left, I made it clear to him that I wasn’t interested in a relationship with him.”
Lawrence folded his arms over his brawny chest. “Let me get this straight. You’re telling me that things looked one way, but things aren’t really as they seemed?”
Melanie’s shoulders drooped. “Touché. And you’re right. I jumped to conclusions about you and those women,” she said with yet another glance over her shoulder. “I’m starting to realize that I’ve been wrong about a lot of the assumptions I’ve made.”
Lawrence stared at her, seeming to study her. Then he said, “I’m not sure spending time together is a good idea.”
“Friends,” Melanie said. She knew that they had to spend time together so he could see the change in her. It wouldn’t help to simply blurt it out, because he would doubt it. “That’s what you said, isn’t it? That we could be friends now? Well, why not start today? Spend some time together and get to know each other again? Put the past truly behind us before we leave this island.”
* * *
Lawrence wasn’t so sure about this idea. Not because he didn’t want to spend time with Melanie, but because she was talking that nonsense about being friends.
Yes, he’d said that to her the night before, but he hadn’t been serious. He couldn’t settle for being Melanie’s friend. Not after having been prepared to spend his life with her.
But the truth was, he was happy to be in her presence, happy to be simply laying eyes on her. Though he felt a stirring in his groin as he checked out her narrow waist and full hips. And, man, those bountiful breasts... They looked especially appealing in that gold bikini top.
How had he had the power to resist her last night when she had all but begged him to take her to bed?
Lawrence swallowed, and glanced away. He had to stop the direction of his thoughts before he embarrassed himself.
“Are you sure you want to go kayaking?” he asked her.
“I can’t say I’ll be much help, but I want to try.”
Lawrence nodded. “Then how about we go over to that island?” He pointed. “The one where they filmed Cast Away?”
“That far?”
“Why not?”
Lawrence saw the fear in Melanie’s eyes and expected her to rescind her offer. But to his utter surprise, she steeled her shoulders and said, “Okay. Let’s do it.”
* * *
“Are you sure about this?” Lawrence asked yet again as he helped fasten Melanie’s life vest around her. His fingers had brushed against her skin here...and there...and each time she’d felt a jolt of heat.
“Yes, I’m sure.”
“Because I don’t want you freaking out once we get farther to sea.”
“I trust you.” Melanie drew in a deep breath as she met and held his gaze. “An Olympic kayaker? If I’m not safe with you, then I’m not safe with anybody.”
“That was thirteen years ago,” he said, barely looking at her as he donned his own life jacket. She was certain he didn’t need one, but either was smart enough to opt for safety, or he wanted her not to feel self-conscious about having to wear hers.
“It’s not like you’re over-the-hill at thirty-five, Lawrence. You’re still in great shape.”
“I expect you to help me however you can. Go on, take a seat out front.”
He took Melanie’s hand and led her into the kayak, then helped her get settled. He had already chosen a paddle for her that he believed would be a good length, and he settled it across the boat in front of her.
“So you know, I have to be back before noon,” Lawrence said. “Twelve-thirty at the latest. I’ve got an excursion planned in the afternoon. So we won’t have a ton of time on the island once we get there. But enough time to hang out a bit and explore.”
“That’ll give us over two hours,” Melanie said optimistically.
“Including rowing time. But we should make it in twenty minutes if the water stays calm.”
Twenty minutes of paddling... Melanie worked out, but could she handle that? When she wasn’t a big fan of the water in the first place?
Suddenly, she wasn’t sure she knew what she was getting herself into. The only thing she did know was that she wanted to get to the island and be alone with Lawrence.
Lawrence led the kayak far enough into the water that it wouldn’t get stuck on the sand, and then maneuvered himself into the boat behind her. He did the first bit of paddling, getting the boat in the direction they needed to be going in order to make it to the island. Then he gave Melanie instructions about how to paddle in strong and steady strokes. “Right paddle in the water, now the left. Good. Just like that. You’ll get used to it. There you go.”
They kept the same pace for a while, Melanie digging deep to do her part to keep the kayak moving forward. Her muscles were getting tired and her movements slowing, but she did the best she could.
“Take a break if you need to,” Lawrence told her. “I know it’s not easy work.”
Melanie was happy to hear him say the words, and rested the paddle in front of her. Taking a deep breath, she ventured a look over her shoulder, and was startled to realize that they’d already gone a far ways from the beach.
They were almost halfway to the island, which, with how tired she felt, seemed a million miles off. But the shore where the resort was, was nowhere near close enough to easily get back to.
As the saying went, there was no turning back now....
Melanie picked up her paddle and began to row again. Her arms were burning, but she pushed through the pain. She wasn’t about to complain. This trip to Fiji had already offered her a few new experiences. And she hadn’t died while doing any of them. She was trying to be a new person, one who didn’t let fear rule her life.
Which was why she didn’t object when Lawrence had loaded snorkel gear onto the boat, telling her that they could do some snorkeling once they got to the island.
As they finally neared Monuriki, Melanie looked behind her, at the resort in the distance, and was amazed.
But Lawrence wasn’t directing them to the closest shore, as she thought he would. Instead he was venturing past that portion of the beach and around a curve, which would take the resort out of their sight.
Melanie continued to help paddle, and as the kayak rounded the corner, she checked out the island in front of them, with a perfect beach and thick trees.
“Oh, my God,” she suddenly uttered.
“What?” Lawrence asked. “Are you afraid?”
“No,” she told him. “Look beside the boat. Look at all those zebra fish!”
Lawrence looked down. “Oh, wow. The fish are plentiful here. Can you pass me the bag of bread?”
Melanie rested her paddle across the boat, and then passed Lawrence the small bag of bread that was resting on her lap. He began to throw morsels into the water, and the fish multiplied. They surrounded the boat in a frenzy to get food.
“This is amazing!” Melanie said, taking it all in with a sense of wonder. She never would have experienced this if she hadn’t had the courage to fight her fear of the water.
“It is. And it’s even better when you put on a snorkel mask and get into the water.”
“I’m in awe. This is so...” She looked around, surveying the ocean and
the shoreline of the small island. “This is so incredibly beautiful. For so many years, I’ve been afraid to get in the water. I’ve been missing so much.”
“I’m glad you suggested this.”
She turned then, slowly and carefully, so that she was facing him as well as she could over her shoulder. “I’m glad I came here, too.” She held his gaze. “And I’m glad I’m with you.”
“Mel...”
“No. Don’t say anything. I just want to be still with you out here in this beautiful place.” She remembered Richelle’s comment, about realizing how we were one small part of a big, beautiful world. And that’s exactly how Melanie felt now.
Lawrence said nothing, and Melanie looked forward again. For a long moment, they were still, and all that Melanie could think, even surrounded with all this beauty, was how much she had missed being with this man.
“You ready to head to the beach?” Lawrence asked.
“Yes,” Melanie said quickly.
“I’ll hold the bread for now.”
“Okay.”
Melanie picked up her paddle and started rowing again. She felt the adrenaline rush that racers must feel when they got close to the finish line.
She saw the movement of the tree leaves, and then a flock of red parrots took flight. “Lawrence, look!” Melanie cried.
But in her excitement, she rocked the boat. As it began to tip, Melanie panicked. Instead of trying to keep her body upright, she reached to the right instinctively, as if to embrace her fall.
And then Melanie screamed as she realized the kayak was capsizing.
Chapter 10
Melanie’s scream was the last thing Lawrence heard before the kayak turned over in the water. Lawrence had tried to teach Melanie the basics of how to prepare for a kayak roll so that they could turn the boat upright naturally. But once Lawrence came back around in the boat, he saw that Melanie was no longer in it.
“Lawrence!” she screamed. She was about five feet from the boat, and being kept afloat with her life jacket, but she was panicking.
“It’s okay, Mel. You’re okay.”
“Help me, please!”
“Just swim toward me. I’ll help you back onto the boat.”
“I can’t!”
Lawrence was going to try to tell her that she could, but he could see the panic in her eyes and knew it would be pointless. He had to get in the water and help her.
Lawrence slipped out of his seat and jumped into the ocean.
* * *
I’m gonna drown, I’m gonna drown!
That was the thought racing through Melanie’s mind as she flailed her hands in the water.
She was so full of fear that she didn’t even see Lawrence jump into the water, but now he was beside her. She felt his arms and grabbed at them.
“No,” Lawrence said sternly. “Let me hold you.”
Melanie drew in a deep breath and tried to relax. And she noticed that she didn’t immediately begin to sink, which had been her irrational fear. Just then Lawrence’s arms wrapped securely around her.
“It’s okay, Mel. It’s okay.”
Her heart was racing frantically, but she concentrated on the strong arms of the man she had once loved so fiercely. The man she had let go because she was afraid he would hurt her.
But he wasn’t hurting her now. He was holding her, reassuring her, whispering words of comfort to make sure she knew she would be okay.
“I’ve got you, baby. You’re okay.”
Baby. A slip of the tongue? Regardless, the word gave her butterflies despite her fear.
And though Melanie was still afraid, she looked Lawrence in the eye. And she saw the truth of his words. That he would never let anything happen to her.
“Okay,” she said.
“Try to breathe easily,” he told her. “Salt water is wonderful. Look around. See how calm it is? Without any real effort, you can stay afloat. And you’ve got a life vest. You’re not going to drown.”
“Okay. I’m not going to drown.”
“That’s it, babe,” he said. “Good, let the panic go.”
Melanie felt infinitely safer, but she was still frightened by the experience of falling overboard.
“How does the water feel?” Lawrence asked.
“Huh?” Melanie asked, surprised by the question.
“The water. Concentrate on not being afraid and tell me how it feels.”
“It feels nice.” And it did. “It feels warm.” She dared to look around. “And, my God, the color of it. It’s beautiful.”
“That’s right, babe. You don’t have to be afraid of it. You’re protected, and I’m here, and I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”
Their limbs stroked each other as they moved their feet in the water. Not by design, but every touch had meaning for Melanie nonetheless. She loved the feel of his body touching hers.
“Lawrence...” His name fell from her lips. Her heart still beat from fear, and not just the fear of being in the water. The fear of whether or not he would reject her if she told him she’d made a huge mistake by letting him go.
She slipped an arm around his neck, determined to conquer the mental shackles holding her back. Fear hadn’t brought her happiness.
Then she put her other arm around his neck. And no longer hesitating, she leaned in and put her mouth on his.
For a moment, she just let her lips press against his, enjoying the feeling of sweet contact. Then with a moan, she tightened her arms around his wet body and began to move her mouth over his. She angled her head and slipped her tongue between his lips, hanging onto him as though she never wanted to let go.
It didn’t take more than a couple seconds before she heard him groan. His arms tightened around her waist. And then right there in the water, they kissed as if there were no tomorrow.
And Melanie wasn’t afraid. In fact, she had never felt more alive in her life.
Lawrence’s hands smoothed from her waist down over her bottom. He dug his fingers into her flesh as he pulled her against him. Melanie gasped as she felt his erection press against her upper thigh.
Lawrence broke the kiss suddenly, and Melanie looked up at him in surprise. “We need to get back to the boat,” he explained. “Get out of this water.”
Melanie had all but forgotten that they were in the middle of the ocean. Being in Lawrence’s arms was all that had mattered. Now, looking over at the drifting kayak, she felt a jolt of anxiety. “I don’t know, Lawrence. I don’t think I can get back in.” Her chest shuddered. “I’m gonna make the boat tip, and—”
“It’s all right,” Lawrence said, his voice calm and soothing. “You trust me, right?”
A beat passed. Then Melanie nodded, looking Lawrence directly in the eye. “Yes, I trust you.”
“I’m going to lead you to the boat. Then I’ll position you on it near the tip.”
“What?” Melanie asked, confused.
“You’re too afraid to get back in, and we’re close enough to shore. I’ll let you sit on the boat while I swim it to the shore.”
“You can do that?”
“Don’t worry. I just want to get you to dry land as soon as possible so you’re comfortable.”
Lawrence got onto his back, secured his arm around Melanie’s waist, and swam with her to the boat. Once there, he released her and instructed her to hold on to the side of it while he collected the oars. With that task complete, he came behind her, and said, “Okay, reach and grab the rope that’s at the other side of the boat and hold on. I’m going to give you a boost to get you up. I only want you on there with your stomach positioned over the boat so your weight is evenly distributed over the front. Understand?”
“I think so.”
“All right. On th
ree, I’m going to give you a boost. One, two, three.”
Melanie tightened her hands on the rope and heaved her body while Lawrence pushed her up. His hands moved from her waist to her bottom as he helped her secure her center over the kayak.
His hands lingered over her bottom, perhaps too long. Melanie looked over her shoulder at him, feeling a rush of excitement as she did. “Is this okay?” she asked. “Am I supposed to be like this?”
“Yeah,” he said, and Melanie could hear a hitch in his voice. “That’s perfect.”
Lawrence swam to the back of the kayak and proceeded to lead it to shore. There was nothing for Melanie to do but hang on for the ride.
And hang on she did, noting that she was far less anxious than she would have been even a week ago out on a boat like this. She wasn’t entirely unafraid, but she wasn’t worried, because she was with Lawrence.
And more than that, in the position she was in with her butt upward, and after having kissed Lawrence, she felt a sexual charge. Was he checking her out, thinking about making love to her?
When they got to the shallow end of the beach on the small island, Melanie eased herself off the kayak. She grabbed hold of the rope and started to pull, helping Lawrence maneuver the boat onto the sand. With the front end of the boat on dry land, Melanie stood back and watched as Lawrence got the back end secured on the beach. She took a moment to shamelessly look at him, at the way his muscles tightened with each strong move.
Her body thrummed with arousal. She wanted to make love to Lawrence, to feel his hard body against hers. She wanted to moan and scream his name.
“I’m proud of you, Mel,” he said, breathing a little heavily. “That was a far trek. But you did it.”
Melanie said nothing. Just started walking toward Lawrence and unfastening her life jacket. He dropped down onto the sand, exhaling harshly as he looked out at the ocean before them. Only when Melanie reached him did he look up at her, finally seeming to understand that she had approached him with a purpose.