Edward blinked. “You think Claire and Josie are writing to each other?”
“Well, Claire writes to Josie, at any rate,” he muttered, thinking of that letter in his sister’s hand, thinking of Josie’s face as she caught him reading it.
Edward frowned. “I suppose it isn’t a surprise to hear that. They are best friends. But what kind of plan could you and Gabriel have possibly concocted?”
“Gabriel believed Josie might be the key in finding our sister, so we thought perhaps I could…I could…trade on certain attractions between us.”
His brother went very still. “But Josie hated you.”
“It turns out she did not,” he said softly. “And I used her deeper feelings to grow closer to her in the hopes that she would tell me what she knew. And when she didn’t and when our attraction got a bit out of control, I-I married her. But last night, she caught me going through her letters and the truth came out. So she asked me to go, and that is why I’m here.”
Edward pushed his chair back with a screech, his face twisted in horror. “What the hell are you talking about?” he asked. “What the hell were you thinking?”
“I don’t know,” Evan admitted, banging his forehead down on the edge of the table. “She was here, and Gabriel was talking about Claire and the line between flirtation and seduction, and I spent time with her, and then it was out of control.”
“You listened to bloody Gabriel?” Edward snapped. “He is the most intelligent person I know, but when it comes to Claire, he has a blind spot the size of a sailboat.”
“He thought Josie might be the key to finding her,” Evan repeated as he looked at Edward again. His brother’s face was red with anger and he was waving his hands around.
“Gabriel thinks everything might be the key to finding Claire!” Edward shouted. “Fuck, if there was a tiny sliver of hope he would interrogate trees and goddamn flowers!”
Evan shook his head. “Yes, I suppose that is true.”
“God, you are an idiot. You lied and manipulated yourself into a marriage, Evan,” Edward continued, pacing the room relentlessly. “That is permanent.”
“I realize that,” Evan grumbled.
“And you did it for some tiny shred of thought that Josie might lead us to Claire?” Edward snorted out a sound of derision. “Oh, and poor Josie! If she kicked you out after discovering the truth in your reasons for pursuit, that implies she must have thought you actually cared about her.”
Evan jumped to his own feet. “I did!” he snapped out. Then he hung his head. “I-I do.”
Edward stopped waving his arms and just stared at Evan, blinking. “Oh. Oh, I see.”
“Don’t I see me.”
“I just…it isn’t expected, that’s all.” Edward shook his head.
“Why?” Evan asked, moving toward his brother. “You didn’t know I deceived Josie, so why did you think I married her?”
“Honestly?” Edward shifted with discomfort. “I-I thought you were being forced to.”
Evan wrinkled his brow. “Why?”
“Well, it is no secret that you and Josie have never gotten along. I saw at Audrey’s wedding that perhaps there was a reluctant attraction there. When we received word you were to marry her, I thought maybe you had behaved imprudently. I assumed I would hear the whole truth eventually, but this?”
Evan gritted his teeth. “First off, Josie is a beautiful woman. It should surprise no one that she should be desired or that a man would want to woo her or wed her.”
Edward blinked. “I never said otherwise, Evan. Calm yourself. There is no need to clench that fist.” He motioned to the hand Evan didn’t even know he had gripped. “Why don’t you just explain yourself to me? You are practically bubbling with emotion, so release some of it.”
“I did listen to Gabriel,” he said slowly. “And I did start out my pursuit of Josie with ulterior motives. But it got…complicated.”
He shook his head as he thought of the day they had spent together visiting the tenants, the time they had spent giving each other pleasure, but also coming to know each other.
“Things often do with women we care for,” Edward mused, drawing Evan from his thoughts.
“Yes, you are correct that there is an element of force to the marriage,” Evan continued. “I allowed things to go too far, but not out of manipulation. I wanted Josie. I needed her. And I think perhaps some part of me knew that if I went too far, I would be given a reason to marry her. I wanted it, Edward. I wanted her to be my wife.”
Edward nodded slowly. “I see.”
“And I intended to tell her the truth about why I started my pursuit.” Evan sighed. “Josie is uncertain about herself, about us, about me, and I thought if I just waited a little while, let her feel how good we were together, that the truth would have less sting.”
Edward tilted his head and looked at Evan with eyes that saw too much. “But then you say she caught you going through your things, so why did you do that?”
“Oh God, I don’t know. Gabriel was telling me I didn’t care for Claire and it rang in my ears. Josie fell asleep after—well, after—and I was in her chamber. I kept hearing Gabriel’s voice saying this was my only chance, saying I didn’t care enough to sacrifice, to do the hard things. I kept thinking of Claire suffering, maybe even dying, if I didn’t help her. I thought if I just looked it would close the topic. I didn’t think Josie would find me. I didn’t think I would ruin everything.”
Edward nodded like he understood, and in a way, Evan supposed he did. After all, his older brother had suffered greatly in his first marriage, and his second to Mary had not come on the smoothest of paths.
“And when the truth came out, did you also tell Josie that you love her?” his brother asked softly.
The question rolled over Evan like a wave, knocking him backward a few steps. “Love. I-I never said love. I care for Josie, yes. I want her, of course. But love her?”
Only the words didn’t seem as foreign or false as he thought they would. Love Josie. Was this love?
Before he could talk to his brother more about it, there was a knock on the breakfast room door and their mother’s butler appeared. “I am sorry to disturb, my lords, but Mrs. Westfall is here to talk to Lord Evan.”
Evan bolted toward the door. “Please, I want to see her.”
The butler stepped aside and revealed Mrs. Westfall as she approached the room. As he bowed away, Evan stared at his new mother-in-law. She was glaring at him.
“How is Josie?” he whispered.
“As poorly as can be expected,” was her snapped reply. She looked past him toward Edward. “My lord. I assume your wastrel of a brother has crowed to you about his misdeeds?”
Edward bowed his head. “I know what he has done, though I promise you, he was not crowing.”
“No?” Mrs. Westfall said, her attention returning to Evan. “I hope that is true.”
Evan took a step toward her. “I take no pleasure in your daughter’s pain.”
Her eyebrows lifted. “That may be true, but you still caused it.”
“I did. And I hate myself.”
“Good.” Mrs. Westfall nodded. “Good. Then perhaps there is some hope. Josie does not know I am here. But I thought you should know that my daughter and I are leaving within the hour.”
Evan drew back. “Leaving! What? Where? Why?”
Mrs. Westfall observed him closely and took a moment to answer. “Yes. Josie has insisted she wants to go. It took a great deal of negotiating to get her to agree to return to London, which answers the question of where. You already know why, don’t you?”
“Yes,” Evan whispered, his tone broken. “But I must speak to her.”
“I happen to agree, but right now is not the optimal time, I don’t think.” Mrs. Westfall clenched her hands at her sides as if thinking about this subject hurt her. “Josie’s pain would not allow her to hear anything you had to say to her right now.”
Evan cleared his throat,
wishing he could erase the lump there. “What should I do?”
“Wait a few days, I think. Allow her to have some space to think about what has happened. And to miss you, which I think she already does.”
“I miss her too,” Evan admitted.
Her eyes narrowed with disbelief, but she didn’t voice it as she said, “Then you come to her when she’s had a bit of time. If you care for my daughter, you had best be ready and willing to fight. But if you don’t…” Mrs. Westfall trailed off and caught her breath, as if the very idea hurt her. “Well, if you don’t, then I hope you will be honest for once. Don’t bob her around on your string while you whisper empty platitudes.”
Evan dipped his head. He deserved this woman’s disgust. He deserved Josie’s as well. And though the idea of waiting, of letting Josie leave him and just praying he could catch her, chafed, he knew Mrs. Westfall was right. He had to do what was best for Josie right now, not himself.
“I will follow in three days,” he vowed. “And I will fix this.”
Mrs. Westfall looked him up and down, her contempt plain on her face. “I certainly hope you can, sir. For her sake.”
Then she nodded to his brother and left the room without another word. As soon as she was gone, Evan buckled into the closest chair and set his head in his hands.
“I did this,” he whispered, hating himself.
Edward came to stand beside him and reached down to squeeze his shoulder. “You did. But now you have some time to decide.”
“Decide what?” Evan asked, lifting his head to look at his brother. He saw Edward’s pity.
“Decide if you’re going to admit you love this girl and fight for her until the bitter end, or if you’re going to let her go and find some way to atone for the damage you’ve done to you both. Only you can decide that, Evan. Only you can know what you’re willing to do.”
“What I’m willing to do,” Evan repeated as his mind went once again to Josie and all they had shared. He’d been trying to avoid loving her, fearing that emotion. Fearing it with her. But now that he was a hair’s breath away from losing her, he could deny it no longer. “I am willing to do everything, anything to win her back,” he vowed. “Because I love her.”
“Good.” His brother smiled. “Then you have three days to plan all the ways you are going to woo her.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Josie glared at the new bouquet of flowers her maid had just deposited in her chamber. They rested next to four others that had been delivered over the past few days.
“Frustrating man,” she muttered as she leaned in to smell the intoxicating mixture of lilac and roses. “Why must he woo me?”
The first three days since her return to London had been uneventful. She had been left alone, even her mother hadn’t pushed her too hard. She’d lain in her bed, staring out the window, and been allowed to wallow in her feelings.
But then Evan had begun his attentions. He was obviously back in London and had made his presence known through unopened letters that sat on her bedside table, visits she had refused and flowers, flowers, flowers. All her favorite flowers.
“Why can’t he just let me go?” she whispered to herself as she flopped down on her bed. “Why does his honor drive him to make this right when it can never be right?”
Of course, that was a difficult attitude to keep when he was trying so desperately. Sometimes she wondered if she was just being petulant, turning away out of hurt and not willing to hear him.
But then she thought of the guilt on his face when she caught him reading her letters. Of the realization that he had been playing her for a fool all along, and her resolve stiffened again.
She would not see him. Because seeing him would be too cruel. Of course, that meant locking out everyone else in is world too. Audrey had also called during the past few days, as had Mary, but she had turned them away as well. She wanted no champions of Evan to confuse her. Or pity her.
She threw an arm over her face and let out a muffled grumble.
“Great Lord, Josie, you cannot lay about in bed all day!”
She moved her arm and looked up to see her mother standing in the doorway. The same look of concern that had been on her face since she learned of Josie’s troubles lined her features now.
Josie sat up. “I wasn’t lying in bed. I was lying on the bed, and there is a distinction.”
Mrs. Westfall’s eyes narrowed slightly. “Only the tiniest distinction, my dear. But regardless, it is time to get ready.”
Josie pushed to her feet and folded her arms. “Mama, I have already told you three times today that I will not go to the Duke and Duchess of Hartholm’s ball!”
“Yes, you have told me three times,” her mother agreed, even as she strolled past Josie to her wardrobe and opened it wide. She flicked through the dozens of pretty dresses inside as she continued speaking. “But I still don’t understand why.”
“Don’t you?” Josie huffed. “Mama, the Duke of Hartholm is the brother to Crispin Flynn. Who attended my wedding with his wife Gemma. Who is the sister of Mary, who is the wife of Edward, who is Evan’s brother.”
Mrs. Westfall leaned away from the wardrobe for a moment and shook her head. “That is rather like all the begetting in the Bible. So many connections.”
“Please do not obtain a sense of humor now,” Josie said as she folded her arms.
“I’ve always had a sense of humor, darling,” Her mother said with a light laugh. She pulled Josie’s favorite gown from the closet, a pale green silk that fell in the most flattering way and brought out her eyes. “I will send in Nell and you should get dressed. We have less than an hour before we are to depart.”
“No,” Josie said, sitting down on the edge of her bed with a scowl. “I have told you I will not.”
Mrs. Westfall turned on her and there was no frustration or anger on her face, even as she said, “My love, you are an adult and a married lady. Under normal circumstances, I would not be able to force you to do anything you did not want to do. I would respect your wishes. But since you have chosen to return to my home, I’m afraid I will continue to make decisions that are best for you.”
“How in the world is going to the Hartholm ball best for me?” Josie demanded.
Her mother shrugged. “You have been holed up in this house since your return to London and people are beginning to talk.”
Josie froze, for the thought of their whispers grated along her spine. “And why would I want to face that?”
“Because you have done nothing wrong. I want you to hold your head up high and show the world that you are above that foolishness. The Flynn family—which is where the Hartholms originate, of course—for all their popularity now, experienced their own set of scandals and have overcome them for the most part. What better place to raise your chin and show the world how strong you are?”
“And what if I am not strong?” Josie asked. “What if Evan is there?”
Mrs. Westfall’s gaze flitted away. “He is likely not invited. Right now I do not think that Evan is a favorite amongst his family, thanks to his actions toward you.”
“So they all know?” Josie asked dully.
“You must have known that they would find out. You can’t just run off the day after your wedding without a family noticing.” Her mother inclined her head slightly.
“There’s that sense of humor again,” Josie muttered. “But I suppose you are correct. Can I not convince you to let me bow out of this ball? Perhaps allow me to run off to that secluded countryside hideaway I have been begging for?”
“You cannot.” Her mother grasped her hand and squeezed. “The longer you avoid this, the worse it will be.”
Josie shook her head. “Fine. Send in Nell. I won’t fight her.”
“Good,” her mother said, her eyes brightening as she left the room.
But as Josie walked to the bed where her ball gown lay, she flinched. The very idea of facing off with not just Society but also the family of her now-e
stranged husband was not in any way pleasant. And all she could hope to do was survive it and not have much attention called to herself.
As the Duke and Duchess of Hartholm’s ball went on around them, Evan cast a glance at Audrey and Jude, but his sister only glared at him in return. He folded his arms.
“You and I arrived back in London the same day,” he said, sidling up to her so his words would not be too loud and be overheard by the crush of the crowd. “And in those four days, I think you have spoken to me three times. And two of those were to call me an idiot.”
Audrey tilted her head. “You are an idiot, Evan. An idiot. There, now I have spoken to you four times in four days and called you an idiot every time.”
Evan shifted and looked to his new brother-in-law and longtime friend for assistance, but Jude offered none. “Don’t expect me to take your side, Evan. I like my wife and don’t want her to kick me out of her bed.”
Audrey shot Jude a look. “And?”
“Oh, and I also think you’re an idiot,” Jude added. He leaned forward. “I actually do. It isn’t just for my wife’s sake.”
“Well, I am not arguing that what I did was wrong,” Evan growled. “Everyone telling me over and over doesn’t help. I’m trying to fix it, but Josie won’t allow me to do so. I call on her every day—twice a damn day.”
Audrey’s hard expression softened a fraction. “I’ve heard from her mother that Josie will be here tonight. So you have been given every opportunity thanks to our friends the Flynns and your mother-in-law. You will have to take advantage.”
Evan’s heart lurched to his throat. He hadn’t seen Josie in a week. Now he ached for just a glimpse of his wife. But the fact was that he had no idea if she would let him near her at all, let alone allow him to speak to her in private so he could begin to repair the damage he had done.
“When will she arrive?” he asked, peering over the crowd, impatience burning inside of him.
“Calm yourself,” came Edward’s voice from behind him.
Evan turned to frown as his brother and Mary approached. Mary and Audrey exchanged hugs and Jude and Edward shook hands, but soon all their attention was back on him.
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