Her eyes narrow as she assesses Sam.
“You’re finally over your best friend’s death and you pick the first girl to cross your path. She’s not even your type.”
And how would Karen know what my type is? Sam is exactly what I want. True, she’s different than the others. Her beauty is subtle, natural, and not in your face. She isn’t plastic and doesn’t need gobs of shit on her face to look stunning. More importantly, she’s just as genuine on the inside as she is on the outside.
“Not exactly.” I don’t clarify because that answer is true for both her statements. “But she’s the right girl, and she doesn’t compare herself to my best friend.”
She fish mouths a few unspoken words before she spins on her heels and swiftly walks away.
“That was Karen?” Sam asks glancing up at me.
I nod.
“That was interesting. I guess I should go find her,” Jenna sighs before she turns and strides off.
But it’s Cate’s face that has gone pale that has me concerned as she walks away and stands against the wall as if she needs it to help her remain uptight.
“Sam, I need to go check on Cate.”
She pats my forearm. “Sure, I have some things I need to check on anyway.”
I weave my way over to Cate.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
She glances up as though she hadn’t noticed me walk over.
“I can’t stay here.”
I search around to locate Sam needing to tell her I have to leave. “Sure, I’ll take you home,” I say absently to Cate.
“It’s not that, Ben. I need to leave Charleston. I can’t stay in South Carolina. I feel Drew everywhere I go, which should be a good thing. Instead, I feel like crying all the time. I need to move so that maybe I can get past this melancholy I feel.”
“Cate.” But what can I say? “I feel it too.” I haven’t been doing my job as her protector very well as of late. “I was at my parents’ the other day and outside I could picture Drew and me as kids. God, Cate, it hurts like a dagger in my chest knowing I can’t call because he’s not here and never will be again. I almost hate going to my parents’ for that reason.”
She clings to me and I draw her into a hug. I think back to so many days we’d ended up in this very position hiding our suffering from Drew. We didn’t want him to see our pain as he faded away into nothingness. Our grief has tied us together in a way that only the two of us can share. For that reason, I want to beg her to stay because I selfishly need her. Something I would do, except Drew counted on me. And I can’t let him down because I have no way of explaining to him my shortcomings. He would want me to let her go so she can live her life.
When we pull back, her eyes shimmer with tears. “I’ve been offered a position in Washington, DC, and I think I’m going to take it. It will be a fresh start.”
“I don’t want you to go, but I get it. And know I’ll be here whenever you need me.” She nods and I help her to a chair where she sits. I’m not sure a drink will cut it, but I say it anyway. “Stay here. Let me get you a drink.”
As I make my way over to the cash bar, I see Horace heading my way and we meet near where my sister stands with Kenneth. I scan the room and Karen is nowhere in sight, which is a good thing.
“Horace,” I say with a grin. The guy has a way that makes it hard not to smile in his presence.
“Happy to see me again?”
Automatically, I glance down at my dick, which thankfully isn’t tenting my pants this time.
“Haha, made you look.”
I shake my head and chuckle because he got me.
“You’re a little late for the client meeting.”
He pats my shoulder. “I’m actually not here for this. I’m meeting someone and saw you. I thought I’d come and say hi.”
“Oh. Too good to come to our meeting?”
He flashes me a smile. “Not too good, just too busy. Besides, I trust you with my money … and other things if you’d let me.”
My jaw hangs loose because what the hell do you say to that?
“Close your mouth, darling. Wouldn’t want you to catch flies with all that honey you have going on,” he adds.
I actually feel my cheeks burn as my sister takes two steps over seeing my discomfort.
“I must meet the man that made my brother blush. I’m sure this is a first.”
Horace proudly reaches out his hand. “Ah, what a lovely specimen you are.”
Jenna gives him her hand and he draws her in for a full on hug. “Well, I can see why your man there is giving me the death glare. You’re beautiful. But then you are your brother’s sister.”
Kenneth glares at Horace with what must be jealousy. When he releases Jenna, he says to Kenneth, “You’re one lucky guy. I’m sure you would never leave your date waiting.”
Kenneth’s cheeks flame pink and I’m beginning to think Horace has that effect on everyone, guys at least.
“Your date stood you up?” Jenna asks, more interest in this line of conversation.
“Not exactly, but he’s surely making me wait. And he knows how I so hate to wait.”
She takes his arm like they’re best buddies.
“Boyfriends suck,” Jenna teases.
“Don’t they?” Horace says leaning in as if they are sharing a secret just between the two of them. Either that or he’s making a joke of the double entendre. “But in all honesty, I have a fiancée. She’s out with the girls. I’m meeting a friend.”
Jenna, never surprised by anything, says, “Well, maybe he’s hung up.”
“Oh, I’d say he’s hung … up.” He winks at her. “Anyway, it was nice meeting you. And Jenna, a beautiful woman like yourself deserves a ring on your finger. If he’s not going to put one there, maybe you should cut him loose.”
Kenneth looks on the verge of exploding, so I step between them. “Good seeing you, Horace.”
He gives me the once over. “Always good seeing you, Ben. If you ever change your mind …”
Sam walks over at that precise moment.
“Oh, you’re her,” Horace says taking her measure. Sam glances between us. He goes on as I cringe wondering what exactly he’ll say. “I came into Ben’s office when he was having a bit of trouble.” He grins at me and I shake my head. “He was looking at your picture, and I must say I can’t blame him for the not-so-small problem he had.”
Before he can say much more, I jump in.
“Sam, this is Horace. Horace, this is my Samantha.”
“Your Samantha. Good for you. Nice meeting you. But I think I need to go check on my friend. He might be pissed at me for not being where I’m supposed to be.”
Jenna laughs hysterically as Horace saunters off.
“Where’d Kenneth go?” I ask.
She points towards the exit. “He’s got a rage-on for some reason. You’d think I stuck a jalapeno in his boxers by the way he’s acting. He’s gone to the room to cool off.”
I turn my attention to Sam.
“Do you mind hanging with my sister for a little while? Cate isn’t doing so well and I’m going to take her to her room.”
Her eyes soften with understanding. “Is this about Drew?”
I nod, grateful I don’t have to explain. I’m more surprised that she gets it and isn’t stupidly jealous.
“I might be a while.” I don’t make it a question, but I do wait for her reaction.
“You take all the time you need. I’ll meet you in the room if you don’t make it back here.”
I lean in and kiss her lips. “God, you’re the best girlfriend ever.”
She laughs. “I’m your only ever girlfriend.”
I kiss her one more time before I have to force myself away knowing I’ve been gone too long from Cate. I finagle the purchase of a bottle of wine from the bar, though they said they only sold it by the glass. Then, I find Cate exactly where I left her.
“Come on. Let’s go to your room and see if this Merlot is up to snuff.”
“You don’t have to do that. You have someone waiting for you.”
“And if she’s worth it, or if I’m worth it to her, she’ll know how important you are to me. You’re my best friend, Cate. And you need me right now. Sam will be fine. She’s a big girl and can handle me not being with her every second.”
Cate lets me lead her out and to her room a few floors down from mine. It isn’t until we’re in her room that she finally speaks.
“Am I doing the right thing?”
We sit on the bed with our backs against the headboard. And I know she’s talking about moving. I tip my head back fighting the need to beg her to stay.
“I love you, Cate. I always will. And I’ll miss the hell out of you, but like I said before, I get it. You just promise me you won’t turn into a stranger on me.”
She leans over and kisses my cheek. “Never that.” Then she places her head on my shoulder.
Finally, I ask. “What about Mercer?”
She sits up. “What about him?”
If the guy hasn’t told her what he’s told me, it’s not my place. Still, I want to gauge how she feels about him.
“I have the feeling he’s interested in making you happy.”
She shakes her head. “He’s just a friend and I like him. But how can I possibly love someone else? And how could you want that for me?”
“I imagine it would be tough to top Drew. But he wanted you to be happy. I want you to be happy”
“I’m not ready,” she admits.
I glance down at her, tucking my finger under her chin so she’s forced to look me in the eye. “To be happy?”
She agrees and the tears begin to pour out of her eyes. I have a hard time keeping my eyes dry as I hold her.
I pull her into my lap and cradle her like she’s mine because tears are my weakness. And I don’t know how to combat them. Plus, I don’t want her to see me holding back my own.
Long after her tears dry and her sobs becomes restful breathing, Jenna comes in.
“I’ve got her, Ben.”
I lay Cate down on the bed. She doesn’t stir which makes me wonder how much sleep she’s been getting. If she’s anything like me, dreams make it hard to rest these days. I’m again assaulted by the realization that I haven’t been around much lately. And that has to change. Cate’s moving and I won’t be able to see her on a whim like I’m so used to.
Jenna adds. “Go find your girl. I like her.”
“I do too.”
My feet are killing me when I get back to the room. I unbuckle the thin straps of my sandals and am kicking them off when I hear the door open. Ben walks in and his downcast eyes tell me all I need to know. I don’t ask him a thing. Instead, I spread my arms wide and he walks directly into my embrace. His body shudders against mine and all I do is stand there and be his rock. Putting myself in his shoes, I can’t imagine how I would feel if I lost Lauren.
At last his body calms. “I’m sorry I was gone so long,” he says.
“No, it’s okay. I was fine and she needed you.”
He stares at me in disbelief.
“What?”
“You.” He shakes his shaggy hair. “Did Drew send me an angel?”
“I’m no angel.” I push the hair back from his face.
“You don’t seem real. And I don’t deserve a gift from above.”
I don’t bother answering him. I kiss him to show him how real I am. There is a partial smile on his face when we break apart.
“This has been the strangest day I can recall.” His towering frame bends over mine, but he eases away from me and I look up at him.
“How so?”
“First there’s you. I was pissed as hell at you because you kept ignoring me and were all over Nick the Dick.”
I sputter out laughing, “Nick the Dick?”
“Yeah. That was my name for him when I thought you two were an item.”
“An item, huh?”
“Okay, I might have imagined that, but it was only my greed for you. I wanted you all to myself.”
His hands reach for my dress and unzip it.
“I wonder why,” I say as I shrug the dress off.
“God, you’re beautiful.”
“I could say the same for you.” I reach for his shirt and unbutton it. “Go on.”
“And then, you came to your senses.” I punch him in his arm which only makes him laugh. “Then there’s crazy Karen. I mean, who called her? She said someone from the office called, but still.” He goes quiet for a second and I wonder about that too. “And Cate drops a bomb on me and tells me she’s moving to DC to get away from all the memories of Drew.”
“You don’t want her to go.”
His head moves side to side and hair spills across his forehead. Before I can help him, his hands are fisted in his hair. “She’s all I have left … of Drew anyway. She’s become my best friend.”
I nod because I can’t help him with that. Cate has to do what she thinks is best. And I don’t know her well enough to offer an opinion.
“Oh, and then there’s Horace.”
“Oh, yeah. He’s a piece of work, isn’t he? And by the way, what picture do you have of me?”
Two pink spots appear on his cheeks.
“Oh my. I hope it’s not anything indecent.”
“No! I would never do that without your consent.” The combination of sheepish and sexy is irresistible on Ben. I walk up to him, grab his face, and kiss him.
“Show me.”
“Huh?”
“The picture.”
“Oh.” He digs in his pants and pulls out his phone. A few seconds later, he hands it to me with the picture pulled up. It was taken that day on his boat.
“I didn’t know you took this.”
“I know. I should’ve said something. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay.” I hand his phone back, a little surprised yet impressed he went to those lengths.
“You looked so perfect, sitting there, I guess I couldn’t resist.” Then he reaches behind me and unhooks my bra. “You have the most gorgeous tits in the world.” His head drops down and he pulls a nipple into his mouth.
A short time later, after his tongue and lips work me into a quite a frenzy, I say, “I think I need to lie down. My legs won’t support me much longer.”
He lifts his head up and says, “Don’t worry, babe, I’ve got you.”
In one clean motion, he lifts and walks me to the bed and asks, “Have I told you I’m a tits guy?”
“I think I’ve already deduced that.”
He shifts his focus away from my chest and starts to shimmy down my body. “And now you’re going to experience what else I fantasize about.”
Our lovemaking that night is slow and languorous. Ben touches me in all the right places, making my body come alive like a sparking wire. After he’s given me two orgasms, one with his hand, the other his mouth, he tears into a condom packet, rolls it on, and slowly enters me. Our eyes never leave each other’s as he slides in and out, seating himself to the hilt every time. His hips rock into me at just the right angle so they press on that certain spot, and soon I’m erupting in yet another explosive climax. He follows as he takes my mouth in a searing kiss.
“I wish I could sleep like this,” I say. His eyes are soft and I run my hands through his hair.
“So do I. But I’d better get rid of this to be safe.” He gets up and takes care of things.
When he returns, I say, “Ben, I’m on the pill.”
He acts like he wants to say something as one corner of his mouth turns up. Then he slides his teeth over his bottom lip. “Spell this out for me, Sam.”
“You’re the only one I’ve been with since the last guy I dated, and I’ve always been monogamous. I’m a safe bet, if you follow. He used protection, even though he wasn’t faithful.”
“I’ve never had sex without a condom. Ever. In my life. Except that one stroke slip up with you.”
“So what
I’m saying is if we’re going to be exclusive, and I know I am, and I’m on the pill, then …” I let my voice trail off.
“You trust me?”
“Yes. Shouldn’t I?” I ask.
“No. I mean, yes. But that’s not what I meant. What I meant is that I’m surprised that you trust me enough to offer that, especially considering my past. But I won’t betray your trust. I swear, I won’t.”
“Then I don’t think we really need condoms, do we?”
“No, maybe not. But not until after I get tested. I usually do every month. Drew made me start doing it a long time ago and I never stopped.”
“Even with condoms?” This worries me a bit.
“Yeah. Nothing’s a hundred percent, according to him.”
“I guess I should get tested too, then.”
He flashes me a smile. “We could go together?”
“Why not? I should’ve done this a long time ago, but I thought I was good since we used condoms.”
“I’m sure you are, but no use in taking chances. Now let’s get some sleep, yeah?” he says with a damn sexy smirk.
“Yeah, I’m beat.”
I hear his chest rumble as he says, “Isn’t that supposed to be my line?”
He pulls me against the wall of his chest and his arms find their way around me. I’m cozy as I’ve ever been and float away into the land of dreams.
My ringing phone wakes us both up hours later and I jump out of bed to shut it off. I shake my head when I see it’s Nick. “Oh, crap!”
“What?” a deep hoarse voice comes back to me from the bed. I smile, remembering all the delicious things from last night.
“It’s ten thirty and Nick wants to know what time we’re leaving. I need to get downstairs to settle up with the hotel. They need my signature on some paperwork.”
Ben gets out of bed and I can’t help but stop what I’m doing and stare at the man. He stretches, and I’m not sure if it’s to give me the show I want or if it’s because he really needs to get the kinks out of his muscles that I now want to run my hands all over.
“You really shouldn’t do that, you know?”
“What?” he asks, smirking, knowing damn well what I mean.
I spin and sashay my way to the shower.
“Wait a minute. You can’t do that to me.”
A Mess of a Man Page 18