And then there was the embarrassment in knowing the neighbors probably knew every time she and Pence argued, since he had a tendency to throw things at her. More than once the police had been called.
Now she had her own place, with the privacy she’d always craved. Unfortunately, although she’d live here for almost six years, she didn’t know her neighbors. It was mainly her fault. She could have met a number of them had she attended one of the homeowner association’s potluck gatherings. But she’d always convinced herself she was either too busy or too tired.
Her thoughts drifted to Pence again. One decision she didn’t regret was divorcing her ex after three years of marriage. Pence had been so mentally abusive, she often wondered why she’d stayed with him as long as she had.
Refusing to think about her ex any longer, she glanced out across her back yard. She lived in a modest community and intended to forgo the thirty-year mortgage, planning to have her house paid off in half the time. She liked the area, especially since most of the stores, shops and restaurants she frequented were just minutes away. There were several bike trails and walking paths, a community pool and recreation center. She didn’t have a good view of the mountains like some of her neighbors, but her house looked out on the huge man-made lake, which she appreciated. Especially on those days when she’d come home after a hectic day at the office and needed to unwind. There was something nice about sitting on the patio in her lounger with a glass of wine, staring out over the lake. Then she could focus her thoughts on something other than work.
When she would fill her mind with thoughts of Sheppard Granger.
It had been a little over six weeks since they’d agreed to get to know each other. What Carson enjoyed about her meetings with Sheppard was that once their discussions about the young men he mentored were concluded, they would spend the rest of the time talking. Getting to know each other better. She’d told him about her divorce, the baby she’d lost, the in-laws she’d loved and why it had been hard for her to consider getting serious about any man after Pence. In turn, he’d told her about his wife and his discovery of her unfaithfulness. It appeared that his marriage had been as unhappy as hers had been. Sheppard had made the decision to remain with his wife because of his three sons.
Carson could tell he was a man who loved his children and was proud of them. He had told her he believed they knew he hadn’t killed their mother.
She felt she was really getting to know him and the more she did, she saw the man Striker, Quasar and Stonewall knew and admired. The same man Warden Smallwood held in such high esteem. The same man who’d earned the respect of his fellow inmates and prison guards. He was such a strong leader, and he had the ability to understand people. He always put others before himself.
The highlight of being with Sheppard was when the meeting ended. Before she left, he would always pull her into his arms and kiss her. No matter how tempted they were to take things further, kissing was as far as they would go. She enjoyed kissing him. He had a marvelous tongue and definitely knew how to use it. And over the past weeks, he’d used it a lot on her. He always took his time when kissing her, as if he was savoring the moment.
After a Sheppard Granger kiss, she would have to hang back in the media room to recover and regain her strength. His kisses could be just that overpowering. They also had a lasting effect. She couldn’t recall the number of times in between their meetings when she would lick her lips and swear she could still taste him in her mouth.
He no longer brought up the subject of their ages. Nor did he talk about the length of time he still had to be confined. Instead, she believed that he was beginning to look forward to a time when he would no longer be locked up. That was evident in the letters he’d begun writing her. She would get one every week. The letters would start off sharing his thoughts and end up stating his feelings about life in general. And about her.
Placing her wineglass on the table, she pulled out the letter she’d received that day to reread it. She’d folded it up and inserted it inside her bra, close to her heart. The contents, written in his bold, inscriptive handwriting had touched her deeply.
Carson,
I just finished dinner with a group of fine men. Most are regretting some of the choices they’ve made in their lives and appreciate knowing, at some point, they will be given another chance. There are some who are here because they were falsely accused of a crime they didn’t commit; though there are others who haven’t come around yet. They think the world owes them something. But I have hope for them.
I have retired for the night. I just finished reading my favorite book, Profiles of Courage, by John F. Kennedy. I’ve read it so many times over the years that the book automatically opens to my favorite parts. Now my mind is clear but before I close my eyes to sleep for the night, I decided to write you this letter.
I enjoy getting to know you and hope you enjoy getting to know me as well. The one thing I’ve discovered about you over the past few weeks is that you are a special woman. Words cannot explain how much you have touched my life in so many ways. I had gotten so wrapped up in mentoring others that I failed to realize that I could use some mentoring myself.
And you have mentored me in ways you don’t know about. I see you and I see beauty. I see hope. I see all that’s still good in the world. You light up my life in ways you will never know and I want to say thank you for making me a part of your life. I don’t know our destination but I thank God so much that you picked me up for the ride. It is awesome.
Forever thinking of you,
Sheppard
Carson drew in a deep breath knowing that Sheppard had no idea how much he lit up her world as well. And she knew, at that moment, she had fallen in love with him. There was no need to wonder why her heartbeat kicked up whenever she saw him or why just sharing his space meant so much to her.
She was well aware of how a future looked for them, but she was willing to take it one day at a time because no man had touched her the way he had. No man had ever come close to making her feel irresistibly special in such a warm-hearted way. He never used lines. Instead, he spoke from his heart through a kind mouth. And then, that same mouth could arouse her in ways she hadn’t thought possible.
Carson recalled the last time they’d met and how their control had been tested. Despite the boundaries Sheppard had set, it was getting harder and harder for him to keep his hands from under her skirt whenever they kissed. And she’d been equally tempted to unzip his pants a time or two. He’d caught hold of her hand to stop her more than once. She would promise to behave the next time but never did. She couldn’t be blamed when he was so darn sexy and had the ability to make her want to do naughty things.
She refolded the letter and placed it back in her bosom, close to her heart. Filled with emotions she’d never felt before, her life vibrated with new meaning and a whole new direction. The thought made her smile. “I love you, Sheppard Granger,” she whispered softly and with easy acceptance. One day she would say those words to him.
Happiness touched her in knowing in a few more days she would be seeing him again.
#
“Sheppard?”
He glanced up at Ambrose. “Yes?”
“I just heard that Fontane is on his way up for your meeting with him.”
“Okay.” Ambrose was about to walk off when Sheppard stopped him. “Wait a minute, Ambrose. There’s something I need to talk to you about.”
The prison guard lifted a brow. “Okay. What is it?”
“All the private time you’re deliberately giving to me and Carson. You’re breaking rules for us. Why?”
Ambrose didn’t say anything for a long moment. Then he admitted, “I’ve been a prison guard for a long time Sheppard. Close to twenty years. I’ve had to deal with hard-core criminals and some not so hard-core, like the ones here at Delvers. But the one thing I’ve always tried to do is not dehumanize anyone, regardless of the reason they are locked up. Everyone has a story and it’s no
t always the one you assume it to be.”
The man then took a deep breath as he leaned against the closed door. “I’d heard about you long before you came to Delvers, Sheppard. I have associates at Glenworth who actually appreciated you being there because it made their job easier, less stressful. You gave young men hope instead of adding to their misery. You made them take ownership of the situation they were in. And you’re doing the same thing here.”
Ambrose shook his head slightly. “Attorney Boyett is also a good person. She doesn’t have to give up her free time and come here, yet she does. I’ve been married a long time and I love my wife. I love my sons. I’m not stupid, nor am I insensitive. I can read people and recognized the spark between you and Attorney Boyett for what it was. I know you would never ask me to allow the two of you extra time because that’s not who you are. You would worry about the consequences for me.”
“Yes, I don’t want you to get into any trouble,” Sheppard stressed.
Ambrose nodded. “I know you don’t and I won’t. My job gives me the authority to make decisions about certain things and I have. Just like Warden Smallwood trusts you, I trust you as well. There aren’t too many men like you, Sheppard, and I regret the course of events that brought you here. But I appreciate knowing you, watching you and even guarding you. Where you’re concerned, I will continue to do my job as I see fit.”
Ambrose’s words had touched Sheppard. Fighting back emotions, he said, “Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
There was a hard knock on the door. Ambrose motioned his head to the door. “Sounds like Fontane has arrived.”
#
“I’m going to die if I stay in here any longer.”
Sheppard leaned back in his chair and watched as Matthew Fontane paced around the room like a caged animal. He’d told Fontane weeks ago the decision the parole board had made and Fontane hadn’t taken it well. “I’ve been locked up a lot longer than you Fontane and I haven’t died yet,” he said. In fact, he was getting a little sick of the young man’s pity party. “You need to grow up, Fontane. Start taking some responsibility for your actions.”
Hostile dark eyes glared at him. “You don’t know how I feel.”
“Yeah, right. I’ve been locked up in here for my health,” Sheppard said. “What you need is some sense knocked into you.”
Fontane stiffened his spine, as if gearing up for a fight. “Don’t even try it old man.”
“Trust me, I won’t. What’s going to happen if you don’t improve your attitude is that you’re going to get more time added to your sentence. That means an automatic transfer to Glenworth.”
Fear suddenly flashed across Fontane’s face. “I can’t go there.” He dropped into a chair and covered his face with his hands. “I’d die,” he moaned. “They’ll kill me if I go there.”
Concern overcame Sheppard. “Who would kill you?”
“The guys I was with that night. The night we tried to hijack the car. They got a longer sentence and were sent to Glenworth. I’ve heard they are accusing me of being a traitor since I stayed behind and saved that old man.”
Sheppard stood and walked over to Fontane, placing a hand on his shoulder. “It will be up to you if you end up at Glenworth. You control your future. No one else does.”
Dark eyes looked up at him. Nearly pleading. “But I don’t want to be here, either.”
Sheppard was usually a man who could handle any situation, but at the moment, he was trying to remain unfazed by Fontane’s inability to understand his situation. At some point he would have to. Otherwise, it would be hard for the young man to ever move on.
“But you are here, Fontane. And at some point, you need to accept that, take control of your life. You need to switch your focus to the day you will walk out of here a free man.”
“A free man? Five years seems like forever.”
“Less than what I’m facing. I was given thirty. I’ve done ten with another twenty to go. If anyone should feel depressed, it’s me. Twenty years is a lot longer than five. Like I said, you should concentrate on walking out of here one day.”
“How am I supposed to do that, Sheppard?”
At least he was asking, which was something he had never done before. Another thing Fontane had never done was to call him by name. He’d always referred to him as “old man”.
“First by following the rules, which will make your life a lot easier here. Then, by becoming a better human being. One who can get along with others. You need to remember that you’re not the only one who doesn’t want to be here. None of us do. But if we all stick together, work together and look out for each other, we’ll survive this place and leave here better people.”
Fontane didn’t say anything. He wouldn’t look at Sheppard. When he finally glanced up, Sheppard saw both pain and determination in his eyes. At that moment, a part of Sheppard believed he was finally getting through to Fontane and he couldn’t help but feel good about that.
9
I got a call that you wanted to see me.” Carson said, walking into the conference room.
Sheppard stood and crossed the room to stand in front of her. He was convinced she had no idea just how much he’d wanted to see her. Smiling down at her, he said, “Yes, I’m glad you came.” He wrapped his arms around her. “I’ve missed you.” As usual, she looked good and she smelled even better.
She glanced up and returned his smile. “I‘ve missed you, too.” She glanced around. “Where’s Ambrose?”
“He had a few things to take care of and will return later. Much later.”
“Oh.”
“Oh? Sounds like you’re not looking forward to being alone with me,” he said teasingly, leaning down and placing kisses around her mouth and nose.
She chuckled. “Trust me, I am. I definitely don’t have a problem with being alone with you, Sheppard.”
“Good.”
He then captured her mouth, sliding his tongue between her lips and immediately feeling desire throb below his waist. Their tongues began mingling aggressively and at that moment, he couldn’t get enough of her taste. The little purr that sounded from her throat goaded him to delve deeper. There was never a time when her kiss didn’t captivate him.
He loved kissing her and was convinced he always would. The intensity of being with her made him forget they were in a room with no windows, a place where prison guards were patrolling the perimeters and barbed wire surrounded the facility. Any other time, focusing on such things could have a negative effect on his mentality. But thanks to Carson, all he could think about was the way he felt as his mouth clung to hers as if it was a lifeline.
His hands automatically lowered to her hips and he shifted into the curve of her body. Her closeness was like a drug, addicting him to the feel of her pressed against him. Every nerve ending within him was brutally brought to life, and as if with a mind of its own, his hand began moving, stroking her backside.
The hard tips of her nipples pressed into his chest and his erection rubbed between the symmetry of her thighs. Their tongues mated greedily, hungrily and insatiably. Their lower bodies grinded against each other relentlessly, making it harder and harder to control the pounding of his pulse. His erection rubbed against her pelvis, and the intensity of his need for her had temptation rocking through his veins.
Moans rang throughout the room. His. Hers. Theirs. Intense pleasure consumed his mind, and he was tempted to place her on the table and spread her legs. From there, he would ease her skirt up to stroke along her inner thigh. It would be so easy to slide his hand between her legs, glide that same hand beneath her panties to stroke her. Feel her wet heat. That same heat he thought about every night. Or better yet, he could unzip his pants, spread her thighs wider and enter her. God knew, a part of him was tempted.
Knowing his thoughts were traveling down a dangerous path, he broke off the kiss and gathered her into his arms, needing to hold her close. Drawing in a deep breath, his hands slowly stroked u
p and down her back.
“You do things to me, Carson Boyett.”
“And you do things to me, Sheppard Granger.”
Her words sounded so heartfelt, he was tempted to pull her back in his arms to devour her mouth again. Knowing they needed to talk, he took a step back. “I wanted to meet with you today for a reason.”
She lifted a brow. “Is anything wrong?”
He saw concern in her eyes and shook his head. “No, nothing is wrong. I want to hire you as my attorney.”
#
Carson blinked, certain she hadn’t heard him right. “Did you say you want to hire me as your attorney?”
“Yes. I’ve thought about it and I don’t think it would be unethical. We agreed to pursue a personal relationship weeks ago and one has nothing to do with the other.”
“But what about the attorney you have now?” Although she thought the man was lousy, she would never bash a fellow attorney to his client.
He chuckled derisively. “I barely hear from him. My father has wanted me to get rid of Youngerman for years but I kept him on. Now I realize he hasn’t given me the one thing you mentioned I need for myself. Hope.”
“Why did you keep him on Sheppard?” That question had nagged at her since reading her research on him. Sheppard Granger was a very smart man, and he had to have known his attorney hadn’t done his best. Why hadn’t he fired the man before now and hired someone else?
“It’s complicated Carson. There were a lot of things he could have presented during my trial that might have swayed the jury in my favor, but I wouldn’t let him.”
She lifted a brow. “Why?”
He drew in a deep breath. “Because it would have exposed a side of my wife I didn’t want my sons to know about. Sylvia was their mother and I refused to let anyone muddy her name.”
Captivated by Love (Grangers Book 1) Page 9