“This is going to take ages to get around,” Ryan called after him.
“Best make a start then,” Cahz said without looking back.
Ryan looked up at the sky. The rain splashed down on his face, it soaked through his hair and trickled down his neck to be wicked up by his shirt. He wasn’t sure if the rain clouds had become heavier or if it actually had become darker. One thing he knew, it was impossible to get any wetter. His jeans were a saturated dark blue and stuck to his thighs. With every step forward he had to carry his own weight, the weight of his child and the resistance from the clinging clothing. Each pace he took forward was slower and shorter than the last. Step by step he was losing pace with Cahz.
A fresh gust of wind gave Ryan a cold clout. He shivered. His whole rib cage felt like it was contracting in on him as he shuddered.
Cahz was up ahead, just sidestepping a weed-draped shopping trolley.
Ryan opened the rucksack strapped to his chest. The child inside was still dry and warm and best of all, sleeping. He pulled the zipper up over the child’s head, leaving a gap at the side for ventilation.
“Better get moving or I’ll freeze to death,” Ryan said to the sleeping child as he strode off after Cahz.
He trudged forward on the moss-covered road, the spongy plants squelching with every step.
“Cahz!” he shouted.
“Keep up,” Cahz absently called back.
“No, Cahz, look at this.” Ryan had spotted something on the other side of the lake.
Cahz turned round. “What is it?”
“Look over there.” Ryan pointed to the slope on the far side.
“It’s an embankment up to a flyover,” Cahz observed. “So what?”
“Look at the trees.”
Cahz stood, his carbine resting on its sling, his arms resting on the carbine.
After a moment he called back, “What trees?”
“That’s it exactly,” Ryan said, pointing. “You can see the stumps.”
“So,” Cahz said indignantly. “Someone cut them down. Firewood or lumber. It’s not important. We need to keep moving.”
He turned and started walking again.
“It’s recent though,” Ryan said, still staring at the other side. “The undergrowth would have obscured the stumps if it weren’t.” He looked round at Cahz. The soldier was marching away, ignoring him. He said, louder, “That means there must be other people alive out here!”
“That means there were other people alive,” Cahz said without stopping. “Past tense.”
“We can’t be sure of that,” Ryan said, trotting to catch up. “Shouldn’t we search for them or something?”
Abruptly Cahz stopped and turned round. “Do we look like a fucking search and rescue team? We get ourselves out of this shit before we worry about anybody else.”
Ryan flung his arms out. “I’m just saying—”
“Well don’t!” Cahz snapped.
“Shouldn’t we do something?” Ryan pressed.
Cahz turned round and started walking again.
“It was doing something that got us in the shit we’re in,” he mumbled.
* * *
“Thanks for waiting,” Ryan said in a sarcastic tone as he caught up.
For the better part of a mile, Cahz had been relentlessly pulling ahead of him. Every now and then Cahz would call out to demand Ryan stop lagging behind. But Cahz would never wait for him to catch up; at best he would turn around and march backwards for a few metres to check his ward was still following. When Ryan started to catch up, Cahz would turn and march off, forcing the exhausted refugee to keep up the pace.
Ryan put the heavy bag of tins on the ground and rubbed his fingers, trying to bring the circulation back to the purple tips. He gave a shudder as the heat generated from moving evaporated in the cold rain.
“I’m not waiting for you,” Cahz said. “I was checking if the radio was working.”
“Oh well, thanks a bundle then,” Ryan said, hooking his thumbs into the straps of the papoose.
“India Tango One calling. India Tango One to anyone receiving. Please come in, over.” Cahz stood still, almost holding his breath, listening for an answer.
“Still nothing,” he said breaking the silence. He pushed back the cuff of his glove and checked the time. “Nineteen hundred hours.”
“Shouldn’t the chopper hear us? Or your ship?” Ryan asked. He had the straps of the rucksack pulled tight, like a comedian about to snap a pair of braces as he took the strain off his shoulders.
“Ship is well out of range. These sets only have a two or three mile range.” Cahz slipped the radio back in its pouch and fastened it secure.
“So the chopper could be like five miles away and he’d never pick us up?”
“Yep,” came Cahz’s glib reply.
He walked off.
Ryan wiped the rain from his face and called after him, “You seem a tad casual about that.”
Cahz didn’t bother to turn round to speak. “We’ve got flares and signal smoke we can use to get his attention. And even if he’s too far out of range to hear us, he might still get the static buzz and know there’s someone close.”
“Wait,” Ryan said in a puzzled tone. “What time did you say it was?”
“Nineteen hundred hours.”
“That’s seven o’clock,” Ryan said. He jogged up to Cahz. “You said the chopper would be back at six o’clock.”
“I said the earliest to expect it back was six,” Cahz corrected. “I didn’t say it would be.”
Ryan threw his arms out in frustration. “Oh that’s great. It could have been and gone.”
“I’ve been doing radio checks every fifteen minutes since six—and anyway we’d have probably heard it,” Cahz said, still marching.
“Oh, great. Probably,” Ryan raised his voice in exaggeration. “We’d probably have heard it.”
Cahz came to a sudden halt. “Listen, Ryan. If we spot it, great; if we don’t we keep going.” Cahz’s voice was strained. “It’s as simple as that. There’s no point wasting energy on shit I can’t control.”
A short distance away a zombie gave an excited moan.
“You hear that,” Ryan said. “You going to ignore that too?”
Cahz didn’t answer as he strode off.
Ryan turned round to look behind them. The street was choked with weeds and debris but no sign of the undead. The rasping call came again, closer and louder than before, but still Ryan couldn’t see the zombie. From somewhere further off a response call echoed.
Cahz seemed unperturbed by the distant moans. Their winding route through the housing estate meant that Ryan’s view was only ever clear for a few hundred yards before a twist in the road obscured it.
“I’m sure we’re being followed,” Ryan said, looking behind them into the sheets of rain.
“Yeah, I’m sure we are, too,” Cahz said without breaking stride.
“It’s going to get dark soon.” Ryan put some effort into his stride and caught up with Cahz. “I thought the plan was find somewhere to hold up before it got dark.”
“Plan went to shit a while back.”
“Whoa! Hold it right there!” Ryan grabbed Cahz by the shoulder, dragging him to a reluctant stop. He kept his grip on Cahz’s body armour. “Yes, the plan’s gone to shit, but so has the whole fucking world! But it’s the shit we have to deal with. Now I know you’re in a bad place right now, but you’d better get it together or I’m going to leave you.”
Cahz laughed. “You’re going to leave me?!”
“Yes, mister fucking hard ass soldier,” Ryan replied. “You’ve got the big gun and the big attitude, but I’ve been stuck out here for years! What about you? When was the last time you were out here without your men and your guns and your helicopter?” He let go of the body armour and gave Cahz a light push on the shoulder. “You go on on your own if you like. I’m finding somewhere to spend the night.” He looked down at the girl huddled in the rucksa
ck strapped to his chest. “I need a rest and she needs a change.”
He slung the bag of cans over his shoulder with a clatter, then turned and walked away.
Cahz watched as Ryan made his way up a side street.
“Just fuck off then!” Cahz shouted. “You’re not safe behind the walls of your precious warehouse now! You’ll be dead in an hour without me hauling your ass along!”
Ryan shouted back, “I’m used to this shitty world, Cahz! How about you?!”
“I wouldn’t be in this world of shit if it wasn’t for you!”
Ryan stopped.
Cahz shouted to the back of Ryan’s head, “And Cannon would still be alive!”
Ryan turned around calmly. “Don’t pin that on me. I never landed you in this. And I never—”
“Yes you did! Yes you fucking did!” Cahz screamed back. “If you hadn’t turned up this morning and fucked up everyone’s day!”
“What were we supposed to do?! Jump up and down shouting yoo-hoo?! We were starving to death in there!”
“Yes, you could have,” Cahz argued. His face was bright red and dripping with rain. “You could have jumped up and down! You could have run around butt naked!” He tapped two fingers to the side of his helmet. “Didn’t you think? Didn’t you think to light a fire or use a signal mirror any number of things rather than barge your way through and turn up asking for a rescue?”
“You’d never have spotted us. I’d rather not have left the warehouse, but what choice did we have? We’d have all starved to death within the month.”
“Yeah, and you’ve fared so much better this way. Half of you never even made it to the chopper. Elspeth is dead. Cannon blew his brains out.”
Cahz took a threatening step forward. His thumb hooked under the armpit of the body armour, he pushed the vest out. “Look at this!” he shouted, presenting the sodden fabric to Ryan. “Look at this! This is my best friend’s brains. Splattered across me and the best part of that fucking garden back there! He died because he stayed behind to help you and your fucking ass wipe friends!”
“And who’s this helping? You? Eh? Who?” Ryan started to walk off again.
“And now you’re going to wander off on your fucking own!” Cahz barked through a hoarse voice.
“Yes, Cahz, I am.” Ryan turned round and pointed a finger at the soldier. “And do you know why?”
Cahz scowled, saying nothing.
Ryan took an agitated pace towards him, the muscles in his arm taut from the effort of reining back his aggression. “Because with an attitude like that, you’ll get me killed quicker than the dead. Look, I’m sorry for Cannon. I truly am. But you’ve lost it. You don’t care anymore.”
Cahz started to speak but Ryan cut over him.
“You don’t care if either one of us survives. You’ve flipped and you just want to pick a fight. You want to take out that anger and frustration, and I can appreciate that. I get it. You’re set on marching along and wasting pus bags. But if you don’t snap out of it, your anger is going to get us both killed.”
Cahz’s face flushed red. “Fuck off. You’re talking crap!”
“No, you fuck off!” Ryan shouted. “Why the hell have you shot every one of those pus bags since we left the house? Why?”
Cahz didn’t answer. He stood trembling with anger, his nostrils flaring, his lips clamped shut.
“I’ll tell you why. Because you’re mad. You’re pissed off Cannon topped himself. Why didn’t you just club the dumb fucks?” Ryan demanded. “Why?”
“I… I…” Cahz stammered.
“You tell me not to fire unless it’s absolutely necessary.” Ryan’s head bobbed with each word. “But you’re wasting ammo left, right and centre.”
Cahz’s head shook with a strange tremor, like a geriatric with a neurological condition.
“Pull it together or you’ll get your ass bit off.” Ryan turned to leave. “I’ve seen it too often.”
He turned and walked off up a pathway between two houses. A frothy stream of muddy brown water sloshed its way down the slight incline towards Cahz. Ryan continued marching on, the runoff leaving indistinct footprints in the accumulating sediment.
Cahz snapped the carbine up to the firing position.
“Don’t walk away from me!”
He had the back of Ryan’s head framed in the sight.
Ryan stopped but didn’t turn around.
“Stop and about face!” Cahz barked. “That’s an order!”
“I’m not one of your soldiers,” Ryan said calmly. “I’m not under your command, Cahz.”
He turned around. His eyes widened as he saw the weapon trained on him.
Slowly he raised his hands to show his surrender.
“What are you going to do, Cahz?” Ryan said softly. “You’re all nice and democratic all morning; now you’re going to shoot a civilian with a baby? For what?” Ryan cocked his head slightly. “For what?”
Cahz’s teeth were clenched together, his muscles rigid with strain. The muzzle of the weapon was trembling as he barely kept his anger in check.
“You know what?” Ryan shook his head gently as he spoke. “Why don’t you just pull the trigger? Waste me like I’m one of those things and then do my daughter.” Ryan paused, staring down Cahz. “You’d be doing me a favour. I don’t have the luxury of topping myself like Cannon did. I have to look after her.” Slowly he brought his hands down from the surrender position and unzipped the rucksack.
He unveiled the crying child.
“I can’t give up on her, on Sam, or Elspeth. I have to keep going, not for myself, but for her.”
Ryan lifted the girl out and cradled her in his arms. The child was flushed bright red, screaming at the discomfort of the cold and the hunger.
Cahz looked down at his carbine. The black metal frame had fat drops of rain bouncing off its body. The same cold raindrops sprayed Cahz’s face, soaking his skin before dribbling off like the miniature river coming down the alley.
“When you decided to stay behind, is this where you thought you’d be?” Ryan asked. Droplets of water dripped from his chin as he spoke.
Cahz felt the pounding of his heart and the rush of breath. The bad taste still coated his mouth. He brought up some phlegm and spat it on the wet ground. The spit was instantly swept away by the fast current of the runoff.
He took a deep breath and lowered the weapon.
“Do you even know where you’re going?” he asked, his voice flat, his eyes still on the barrel of his weapon.
“We’ll work it out, man,” Ryan said. “We’ll work it out.” He lowered his daughter back into the shelter of the papoose and pointed off up the path. “I think there’s a school this way; fences and a big flat playing field.”
Cahz took a snort of breath in through his nose and followed where Ryan was gesturing.
“Sounds like the best plan,” he said, his chest still heaving.
* * *
The dark rain clouds eradicated the last light of day and a hazy gloom reduced visibility still further.
Ryan’s thoroughly soaked jeans clung to his legs, chafing him with every step.
“How far have we got to go?” Cahz asked.
The pair were walking side by side. Cahz’s desire to distance himself had softened.
“Huh? Is that you whining?” Ryan laughed.
“No. I want to know if we’ll make it before it goes dark,” Cahz said.
“It’s just down this road,” Ryan answered.
“You said that ten minutes ago.”
“I know, I know,” Ryan said defensively. “Look, I don’t know this area that well. I only ever drove down here back in the day. It’s much further when you’re walking.” He scratched his chin. “Well, it’s not any further, it’s just taken longer than I expected. You know what I mean?”
“Yeah, I do. Me and Cannon walked over a hundred miles to get to safety when the whole thing kicked off,” Cahz said. “Some days you’d walk for hours, the
n you’d look at the map and you couldn’t see any progress.”
“You and Cannon been friends since the kick-off?” Ryan asked.
“Yeah, basically,” Cahz said. “A handful of us regulars managed to get out of Nelson.”
“Nelson?”
“Yeah, a pissant little town. Nothing there, but we’d been sent to set up checkpoints to test for infected. They were quarantining whole parts of the country, trying to stop the spread at that point. Well, the shit hit the fan, like it did everywhere. When we lost contact, our captain took the decision that we should bug out and head for a naval base on the coast. We took a royal fucking getting out of there and on the way out we acquired a bit of a following.”
“Pus bags?” Ryan asked.
Cahz sniggered. “Yeah, those as well, but I’m talking about civvies. Refugees spotted the uniforms and demanded we protect them. So the six of us that were left ended up escorting fifty-odd refugees all the way to the coast.”
“Was Cannon in your squad?”
Cahz looked across at Ryan. After a moment he faced forward again and said, “Cannon was one of the civvies. He’d been out of uniform a few years by then, but he still had the skills. We’d have lost a lot more people if Cannon hadn’t been with us. After that we kind of stuck together. It’s good to have a man like Cannon you can trust…”
Cahz physically stopped.
“What is it?” Ryan looked around nervously.
“I thought I could rely on him. I thought I knew him.” Cahz was breathing heavily. “I never thought he’d…”
Ryan waited for him to restart his sentence.
“Look, Ryan, there’s something I need to tell you,” Cahz said, his voice flat and serious.
“Yeah?”
Cahz spat a bitter mouthful of phlegm onto the ground. “I think I’ve been infected.”
“What?” Ryan was stunned. “When—I mean how?”
“Back in the plaza this morning,” Cahz said.
Ryan looked at either side of Cahz’s face. “Where? How?”
Remains of the Dead Page 21