“What color is my aura?” Chaos asked. She couldn't help but be curious. The color of someone's aura was supposed to be important. She’d read that somewhere. Of course she hadn’t believed in auras or psychics or ghosts or anything then. It seemed like such a long time ago.
“Your aura is a beautiful mixture of purple and silver. Those are two very rare colors.”
“What does that mean?”
“Well purple is a power color and it’s a protective color. Many people have a little bit of purple but you have a surprising amount. It’s your predominant color. It means you’re strong. You know who you are and you accept your role and responsibility in the world. You can be ruthless but make fair decisions. Purple also indicates that while you don’t listen to other people for guidance you do listen to your higher power, your intuition. The silver that’s radiating around you is extremely rare. Sometimes I see it on Linda but she’s the only other one I’ve ever seen it on. It says that you’re a very high energy person with a pure heart and that you have someone or something very powerful protecting you.”
“They’re not doing such a good job.”
“But maybe they are. Maybe you’d be dead if they weren’t protecting you. In all the tragedies that you’ve witnessed in your life, you’ve come out unscathed, right?”
Chaos nodded. She had. “If you don’t count the emotional trauma.”
“Well that’s true but I don’t know anyone who could have seen what you’ve seen and experienced what you’ve experienced and still be sane. Not just sane but pretty amazing. So think about that. You ready to continue?”
Chaos nodded. She wasn’t sure if she believed in all of this, but Sheila had made a surprisingly insightful observation.
“Do you feel the energy between us? Between our hands?”
She did feel something. “Yes. It’s sort of tingly.”
“Yes! That’s my aura and your aura connecting. We each have our own signal and in order to read yours I have to adjust mine a bit so we can connect. Once we connect and I see your aura, then I can begin to enter your past, present, and future.”
“My future?”
“Yes. Ahhh, curious now aren't you? Not this time. We’re supposed to focus on your mom, right? So let's start at your childhood home.” She closed her eyes. “It’s on a farm but you're not the land owners. There’s a large house in the front and a...wow. There’s a really cute house near the back of the property. It’s white with a white picket fence and I see a dog, a spotted spaniel but it also doesn't belong to you. I can see your dad. He’s a police officer? He has deep wrinkles on his forehead and between his eyes, like he spends a lot of time frowning.”
Chaos nodded. Her father was the only reason she hadn't been in trouble with the law. Of course, once he died she lost all favor with the local department. She didn’t blame them. She was a walking magnet for trouble.
“Your dad is a big guy. He’s trying to smile for you but he seems pretty worn out on the inside. Tired.”
That was her dad. Eternally weary. “I didn't make things easy for him.”
“So let's go back a bit further. Let’s see if I can find you when you're very young. Ah, you're a baby. So cute. Your mother's necklace is hanging at the foot of your crib. Even through time and space it looks like an omen of things to come. Let me see if I can touch the necklace. I can but I’m not getting anything from it but you're crying now. Wow, that's loud.”
A lady has just entered the room. She is looking longingly at your father. She has short brown hair, large brown eyes, an angular nose, and cheek bones to die for and really thin lips. She’s touching your father like a friend but she's not looking at him that way. And she's not friendly to you. Do you know this woman?”
“No.” She didn’t sound familiar but then again, Chaos didn’t know most of her extended relatives. “Maybe she’s family?”
“She’s not looking at him like family. She’s looking at him like dinner. I think she may be the key. She’s not connected to you or I'd be able to read her too and I can't seem to get anything from her. Strange. Let me try your dad. Oh. Goodness.”
Sheila’s eyes popped open. Chaos jumped back, breaking the connection.“What did you see?”
Sheila looked up at her with an apology in her eyes. “It’s bad. I’m sorry. She’s your dad's mistress.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Sod Weighs Heavy on My Head
Chaos was still reeling. Her dad had an affair. It just didn’t reconcile with the man she knew. Her entire life she’d never seen him go out on a date, let alone have a sexual relationship. She didn’t know what to think.
Sheila patted her on the hand, stood, shook her own hands like they were on fire and smiled. “From what I could see, they weren’t having an affair when your mom and dad were together, but she wanted to. They didn’t start up until about twelve months after your mom died. It didn’t last long, maybe a year or so. She wasn’t a nice woman.”
“You’re sure?”
“’Fraid so.” She bent down and placed her hands on the floor.
“What are you doing?”
“Breaking the connection. The psychic connection. If I don’t then you and I will be connected for a while. I’ll get to dream your dreams with you and vice versa.”
“Oh. Good idea.” Chaos thought about the dreams she’d had last night after she and Dakota had, well after they’d done whatever it is they’d done. She didn’t want to share those dreams with anyone.
“And I think,” Sheila started and then laughed. “You know you’re blushing again; I think you have enough on your plate without experiencing my dreams though I had a really hot one about John Travolta last night. Sexy!”
“No , thank you.”
Sheila grinned. “Go outside and get some fresh air. Linda has a beautiful garden. She’ll come get you when she’s ready to teach you how to quiet your thoughts. There’s a sandwich for you and some lemonade. Oh, and Dakota’s out there too. Just a head’s up.”
Chaos pushed open the screen door and stepped into the most amazing garden she’d ever seen. Being a landscaper, that said something, because she worked and helped design some pretty cool gardens. This one, though, this one she could tell was designed and cared for by Linda and no one else. It had her signature all over it. Almost overgrown, it was a woodland garden. Thick with trees, shrubs, and low lying flowers, a stone path wove its way through mossy covered rocks. Not sure how she managed such density and lushness in a desert climate, Chaos gained instant respect for Linda’s landscaping skills. The garden was a welcome respite for anyone. The trees opened their branches and beckoned her deeper inside.
Chaos wound her way along the path. Relief filled her when she saw him. Dakota sat on the ground beneath a large aspen tree. He looked like part of the landscape, still and alive as if he’d been there for centuries. The leaves had turned a golden yellow and still clung to the branches. Behind the tree, fiery sumac leaves lined the fence and gave it a rich crimson background. They reached upwards like flames licking the sky. “You look at home here.”
“Just a content guest,” he said. “Sandwich is on the table there.” He pointed to a small round wooden table in the far corner of the garden.
Chaos saw two glasses and two plates on the table. “Join me?”
Dakota pushed to his feet. She noticed he wasn’t wearing any shoes as they padded across the soft grass under the tree. It tickled her toes. “This is the softest grass I’ve ever felt. I wonder what it is.”
“Nothing special, basic bluegrass.”
“No. Bluegrass doesn’t feel like this. This feels like…like baby hair. Fine and soft.”
He looked at her curiously. “How do you know?”
She laughed. This was all backwards. Normally people knew a bit about each other before they shared a bed. Well, at least from what she could tell that’s what they did. She hadn’t been intimate with anyone since she was seventeen and that great sixty-second pleasure had cost
the guy his leg. A rattlesnake had coiled itself onto the seat of his car. He’d sat on it going home that night.
“We don’t know much about each other, do we? I’m a landscaper. I own a company that mows lawns, fertilizes, and stuff like that. About three years ago I got my design degree so I design yards now too.”
“You ever design anything like this?”
Chaos sat down at the table and looked around. It had an ethereal feel to it, like she’d stepped inside fairy land. “Not even close.”
She looked down at her sandwich and laughed. “PB&J? I haven’t had a peanut butter sandwich since I was in grade school. Cool.” She took a bite then washed it down with some lemonade. Ironically, the childish lunch was making her feel more grown up. “I have to apologize to you for last night.”
Dakota’s eyebrows raised in question.
“You’re in danger now. I should have stopped it.”
“Do you regret it?” he asked, taking a bite of his sandwich.
“I regret putting you in danger. Anyone that gets close to me dies or gets hurt. I should have stopped it. I meant to but it just got out of control quickly.” And it had felt wonderful.
“Seems like things have a way of doing that with you. So, what did you learn this morning with Sheila?”
That’s it? No, ‘It was worth the risk or I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my hands to myself?’ His nonchalance stung. She shoved it aside. It didn’t matter. She’d be gone by the end of the day. He’d be a distant memory. The thought filled her with a familiar sadness, loneliness combined with regret. She knew it well. Chaos took a deep breath and told Dakota about Sheila’s vision of her father’s mistress.
“You don’t believe it?”
“I’m struggling to. I never saw this woman and you’d think if my dad had an affair with her that there’d be pictures or I’d have seen her at some point.”
“I wouldn’t keep pictures of my mistress in the home where I was raising my child.”
“But you understand having a mistress?” A bubble of anger began to grow inside her. It was welcomed with open arms, much easier to deal with than loneliness, regret, and rejection.
“I didn’t say that.”
“Then what are you saying?” Chaos gripped her lemonade, fighting the urge to throw it in his face. “Would you have a mistress?”
“Stop trying to pick a fight with me. I’m sorry you got bad news. At least now you know what you’re up against.”
“You didn’t answer the question.”
Standing to his feet, Dakota sighed. “In a perfect world, no. Family means everything to me. If I loved my wife or at least respected her then I wouldn’t do that to her, but you can’t judge people when you don’t know the circumstances.”
He was right. She didn’t know the circumstances of her parents’ marriage. She didn’t even know what her mother was like. Maybe she was a horrible person. “It’s just so hard to wrap my brain around. How could Sheila see that? How could she know?”
“There’s going to come a time when you have to make a choice, Chaos. You either believe or you don’t.” Dakota leaned into her and placed a kiss on her forehead before turning and walking away.
She believed as much as she could and more than she used to. It had to be enough. Then again, she thought, it didn’t matter what she believed. It was clear he didn’t trust her and to be honest, he shouldn’t. It could cost him his life.
She was so deep in thought she didn’t hear Linda approach. “He doesn’t trust easily, Chaos. And until he can, you won’t get to see the best parts of him.”
“I’m not going to be around long enough to earn his trust,” she said. “Beautiful garden, by the way. I could sit out here for hours.”
“Sometimes I do and thank you. Dakota doesn’t need years of undying faith to earn his trust. He just needs to trust you. He wants to; I can see that, but something’s holding him back.”
Chaos knew about the dreams but it had to be more than a silly dream. A dream that warned him they were all in danger because of her. “Did he tell you what it was?”
“No. You’d have to ask him. He’s fiercely protective and I think he sees you as a danger. Which, you are, of course, but we’re taking care of that.”
“I messed up last night. I put him in more danger.”
“He’ll be okay. We all will. You can’t control your heart, no matter how hard you try. Now let’s teach you to quiet your mind. Are you comfortable?”
“Yes.” Sitting outside in this magical garden, she hadn’t been this comfortable in days.
“Great. Close your eyes and take deep belly breaths.”
Chaos closed her eyes and breathed deeply. Her senses picked up on the scent of marigolds.
“They keep away the bugs,” Linda said.
“So do ladybugs and you’re still hearing my thoughts,” she said, not opening her eyes.
“Yep. It takes time. Imagine a wet towel around your head. The weight of the towel quiets your thoughts. They cannot pass through the towel. Can you feel it on your head?”
Not really, she thought.
“Okay. Let’s step back a bit. Have you ever held one of those towels bakers use? They’re lightweight cotton, almost like linen. They’re big and white and soft. Visualize yourself holding one of those towels. You are standing in front of the sink. You turn the faucet on and run the towel under the water. The water is warm and it feels good on your skin. Stepping away from the sink you lean over and wrap the towel around your head like you would if you’d just gotten out of the shower. Can you see the towel on your head?”
“Sort of.” Chaos visualized the towel on her head. I look stupid, she thought.
“Can you feel the weight on your head? It’s soothing. Not too heavy.”
She nodded and in her mind’s eye the towel slipped right off of her head. Chaos pushed it back up there and the towel unraveled, slipped to the ground, and landed with a thud at her feet.
“Well that’s not working,” Linda laughed. “You respond to nature; let’s try a little imagery with nature. What’s something that could wrap around your head?”
“Sod,” Chaos laughed. She pictured a sheet of grass and dirt wrapped around her head. It was heavy and dirt was getting in her eyes.
“That’s not a very graceful image,” Linda said. “What about clouds? Can you imagine clouds around your head, dampening your thoughts? They don’t have to be storm clouds. Maybe big white puffy clouds or those beautiful wave clouds we get here in Colorado. We have some in the sky today.”
Chaos knew exactly what she meant. Colorado’s clouds were like no other place she’d been. She envisioned one of those clouds dropping down to shield her mind. It felt comfortable. Not wet but warm and protective. Like a fluffy blanket. “I think it is working.”
“Okay. Good. Send me a thought. Something that you want me to know.”
Trusting the shield, Chaos focused on an image of Dakota, naked in her bed. She sent Linda the image.
“That must be some thought. You are turning pink.”
Chaos opened her eyes. “You didn’t hear it or see it?”
“Nope. But I can see the pulse jumping in your neck and you’re blushing a beautiful crimson color, almost the color of my favorite merlot.”
It worked! She beamed. “So now I have to spend the rest of my life with clouds around my head?”
“Just meditate every morning and put it there. It’ll stay. I’ll show you how to meditate later. Right now, I think Kat has something to show us. Are you ready?”
“For what?” It wasn’t time to contact Bill yet. They were going to wait until tonight when he liked to appear.
“To see what she found on our cameras.”
Chapter Twenty-Four
Glowing Bubbles Encircled Her Head
Chaos walked into Linda’s sitting room. A long cord snaked from Kat’s computer across Linda’s living room to the back of her television.
“I hooked my laptop up to
the television so we could all see without having to pass the computer around. I hope that’s okay.”
“It’s brilliant, Kat,” Linda said. She took a seat in an armchair. “What did you find?”
“Well, I’d rather show you and you guys can tell me.”
“Sounds ominous,” Chaos said. Anxiety caused her stomach to feel like it was full of ants.
“Well, let’s start with the one you took, with the video on your camera.” Kat clicked play.
Chaos saw her back on the screen. She was sitting on the bed in that dingy hotel room. Chaos heard herself ask Dead Bill if he was a ghost. She heard the one-sided conversation and saw nothing.
“Do you see it?”
“See what?”
Kat stopped the image. “There’s a black shadow that hovers. It’s faint, but it moves.” She moved her cursor to point out the image. “It’s here. Here, I’ll play it again.”
She rewound the image and played it again. Chaos watched, her hands clenched in her lap. Sure enough, there was a black shadow, more like a darker area in the room. It hovered over her and just beyond her reach. As they watched the video, the shadow moved down alongside the end of the bed and back. “Stop.” Kat stopped the video. “This is where I noticed the shadow. Do you see it against the wall?”
“Good eye for an amateur,” Kat said. “I noticed that too.”
A wave of pride washed over her. “I was desperate to prove I wasn’t insane,” she said. “What about the audio?”
“We caught the same thing that you did. He says, killed me. I’m sure you don’t need to hear that again. Let’s move onto the video from last night, okay?”
Chaos nodded. Kat returned to the couch and loaded the new video. Within seconds they were watching what the cameras captured inside the bakery.
“This is the video from the EVP session with the ghost box. It’s the one where you’re talking to Susan, I believe, and she warns Chaos about Bill.”
Chaos watched the EVP session and noticed something different right away. “What’s all that around my head?”
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