The whole day has gone by and I’m still trying to figure out what to do.
Maybe though, I’ve already done my part and there is nothing left for me to do but try to move on again.
Dylan
Three days left and counting.
I have tonight with Mac and tomorrow I am going to man up and go see Abby to say goodbye.
That was the one thing I promised myself I’d do. Go see her and say goodbye. See her one last time before I ship out. Have one last memory.
Maybe that will give me some sort of assurance that I’m doing the right thing. Right now, I still have the same shit cowardly feeling.
I can’t win. I am supposed to feel better by ending it with Abby.
Not worse.
I am supposed to feel like I’ve done the right thing but I feel worse than when I was contemplating what to do.
I’m supposed to feel like I put her feelings first, but maybe that’s the way this is supposed to play out.
How am I supposed to feel any type of good if I just ended a beautiful relationship with a woman I love to no end?
Mac greets me with that supportive vibe I always get from him.
We’re doing takeout tonight and I’m staying over while we watch reruns of the games. We’re big football fans and he was so busy at the end of the season that we missed the finals.
That’s what we’re doing tonight.
I look at him as I walk into the house and I know he must know what happened between Abby and me but he’s the kind of guy who won’t say anything that he doesn’t think is his business.
“I’m conflicted. I think we should have something different than pizza. What do you think?” he asks.
“Um, yeah. I’m good to do whatever you want,” I say with a nod. “Um…Uncle, do you…” My voice trails off.
I want to ask him about Abby but I don’t know if I should.
“What’s up?”
“Did Abby talk to you? I mean about me and her.”
“Yeah…she did. I asked her about it,” he replies.
We stare at each other and he gives no inkling of his thoughts away in his expression.
“Is she okay?”
“Dylan, I’m not sure I’m the one to ask that.”
“Mac, come on, please just tell me,” I press.
“Okay. No, she’s not okay. Did you expect her to be?”
It’s a good question and now I feel foolish for asking something that should be obvious. Of course she wouldn’t be okay with the bomb I dropped on her when just months ago I made her think we wouldn’t expire.
“No, Mac…I just thought…well I think I did the right thing.”
“Well good. Then we just have to see how things go. No one can refute that feeling of having done the right thing.”
I sigh with frustration because I can see he has some opinion on the matter but isn’t saying shit to me because he doesn’t want to get involved.
“Mac, I never said I have the feeling. I said I think I did the right thing. Look what happened to her with Jack. You’ve seen her grieve for him. I can’t claim to love her and put her through that when she could be with someone else who can give her what she needs.”
“Tell me this…what is that you think she needs?”
“Someone who’s not in a dangerous job. Someone who can take care of her and make her happy. Someone who she doesn’t have to worry about.”
“Okay, well it sounds like you got this figured out. If you know what she needs and you think you did the right thing then I stand by my word. No one can refute that.” He pats my shoulder and smiles. “Now, let’s think of what to eat and enjoy our last crazy night together.”
My shoulders slump and I bite the inside of my lip. I stare at him and see he’s keeping up the charade. What he thinks about my situation is written all over his face and I can tell he doesn’t agree with me or what I did.
“Uncle, please. I know you. You don’t agree do you?”
He smiles. “Dylan from when you were a boy running around with my kid I always encouraged you boys to do what you thought was best when you were making any kind of decision. That way you wouldn’t have to rely on anybody, but I hoped you’d come to me for advice. And if you did you wouldn’t hold it against me if I told you what I thought. If you’re asking me for my advice I’m going to tell you what I think, so please be clear on what you want me to do.”
One thing I know about Mac is that he’s wise. He knows his shit and since I’ve been home I’ve come to know how much Abby means to him so this is the one time I should take his advice.
“I want you to give me advice,” I clarify.
He nods. “Okay. I will do that. We’re standing here in this room. A bullet could come through that window right now and kill me or kill you. You could drop dead right now from some undiagnosed condition and the only difference between you being dead here or in Afghanistan is the cause of death. The point is you could die anywhere and we wouldn’t expect it. That’s how death works. Your father has been in service for close to fifty years and he makes it work. He married my baby sister and not a damn day didn’t go by while he was serving out in the mouth of hell that your mom didn’t worry about him. He went to the Gulf War, Iraq and Afghanistan, and still continues to serve his country. You have such a good example to gather inspiration from, and you think it’s a good idea to break up because you might die?”
I’m listening and my cheeks burn with embarrassment because he’s right.
“Mac…”
“I’m not done yet,” he chuckles. “Dylan, what you’ve done is this: you’ve used one fear to justify another. You’ve thought about what happened with Allison and allowed it to guide you actions with a woman who wanted to be with you and accept you and everything that made you, you. She gets that you’ve wanted to be a marine since forever, she gets that it would have crushed you if you didn’t get the chance to go back, and she knows the man she fell for will only be happiest doing what he loves the most. That’s who Abby is. You just never allowed her to be that for you. That’s my advice.”
All I can do is stare at him.
He’s never given me such in-depth, thorough advice that’s practically ripped into me and shaking me up and out of my fears.
Everything he said is working its way into me and I see it for truth.
I cut off everything Abby and I could be by not giving her a chance.
Fucking hell. That’s what I did.
“You’re right…Mac, you’re right.”
“Then do something about it son. If I’m right do something about it. If you love her that’s all you need.”
“I love her,” I tell him.
“Then fix it.”
I stare and process but there’s not much I can say besides, “I have to see her now.”
“Yeah?”
I nod. “Rain check on tonight?”
“How about we watch the game when you come back on leave?” He grins.
I bring a hand to my head, feeling overwhelmed. “Yeah, we can do that.”
“Go. She’s at home.”
“Thanks Uncle.”
Another pat goes to my back and I leave.
I jump back on my bike, set off to Abby’s, and when she opens the door and I see her I know Mac’s more than right.
All I need right now is how I feel.
Love. Love for her. I want her.
She’s the woman I’ll fight to keep.
She’s the woman I want to run home to, the woman I want to look forward to coming home to.
She’s my reason.
Abby
He’s just looking at me and I don’t know what to expect.
I assumed he’d come and say goodbye.
I planned to go see him if he didn’t see me by tomorrow. I figured he’d be with his family and friends.
I’m in the background now as the woman he passed his time here with, so I factored in that I might not be on the list of those to say goodbye to.
This could be it though, and if it is I’ll wish him well.
“Hi,” I say with a small smile.
“Can I come in?” he asks.
“Yes, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to just have you standing by the door.” I step aside so he can come in and close the door.
“I’m sorry to come over so late. I wanted to talk to you.”
“Oh…I was going to go over and say goodbye. I didn’t expect you to come. I know you have lots of people to see.”
“This isn’t to say goodbye, Abby.”
I narrow my eyes and tilt my head. “Isn’t it?”
“No, but I appreciate that you were going to come and see me. I would have come to see you. I’m here because I don’t want to say goodbye to you.”
I continue to stare at him wondering if this is real. “Dylan…what are you really saying?”
“I’m saying I love you and…I made a very foolish mistake breaking up with you. I thought I was doing the right thing. I want to say that I thought I was doing the right thing for you, but it would be a lie. It wasn’t just you I was thinking about. It was me too.”
I take a step closer to him and gaze up into his eyes.
“I freaked out Abby, and wasn’t thinking. You went through a lot with Jack. I wouldn’t want you to have to go through the same thing with me if something happened to me. I didn’t want you sad when you could be happy. At the same time I thought there was a chance you’d come to that conclusion all on your own and change your mind about being with me.”
I shake my head. “I wouldn’t have been able to change my mind because I love you too, and that means all of you and what you decide to do for work.” Telling him I love him feels easy. Hearing his words have opened my heart and eased my pain.
He sighs and looks at me with adoration. “Abby, I’m really sorry. I’m so sorry I hurt you. I didn’t mean to. If you give me a chance I’ll fix this and make it up to you. I’ll make you happy again,” he promises.
I smile. “When have I ever said no to you Lieutenant?”
“I struggle to remember.”
“Well, it’s a yes.”
I smile when he reaches for me, cupping my face and moving in to claim my lips.
At the same time he claims my heart, and I know in that moment that everything will be different.
I’ll be different.
I’m not broken anymore.
He fixed me.
Epilogue
Epilogue: Abby
* * *
Six months later…
* * *
I smile wide at the open sea before me.
This week Dylan and I decided to tick off a few things from my box.
Sail the open sea and tour Europe. Going to the Vatican and eating a lobster came as part of the tour.
I gaze out into the beauty of the Mediterranean Sea.
The Tuscan Coast is just fading away and all I see around me is the lush middle of the blue-green sea that reminds me of Dylan’s eyes.
Warm hands circle around me and he pulls me against the hard wall of his chest, kissing the side of my neck.
I giggle when he starts nibbling on my ear.
“Oh my gosh you are too much mister.” I smile and shuffle around to face him.
“No more than you. I have big plans for us today.” He beams with mischief.
He’s been like this every time he is home on leave, coming up with some amazing thing for us to do.
This is perhaps the best idea yet. I can’t imagine what more he has planned.
I laugh. “What else are we gonna do? You spoil me rotten.”
“Well, there is one more thing I’d love to do.” He is smiling but now a serious expression washes over his face as he reaches into his back pocket and pulls out a little pink box.
At first I stare at it thinking he’s bought me a gift, but then he flicks it open and I see it’s no mere gift.
The princess cut diamond set in the delicate gold band of the most beautiful engagement ring stares back at me glistening in the bright sunlight, and the most beautiful man I’ve met in my life looks at me like I’m the most important thing in his world.
He smiles cautiously as he lowers to one knee and holds up the ring before me.
“Dylan…” I breathe.
“Abby, last year I met you and I don’t think I’ll ever forget that first meeting, or everything else that came after. You are everything I’ve ever wanted and I wondered if maybe Jack would mind if you became my girl? I wonder if he would allow me to take care of you for the rest of my life? But most of all I wonder if you’ll be my wife and give me the chance to love you forever?”
I try hard not to cry but tears of happiness slide down my cheeks.
“Yes…yes to everything.”
“Yes?” he asks, as if there is any other answer.
“I love you, of course it’s a yes.”
“I love you too,” he tells me, then slips the ring on my finger.
It feels like it’s always belonged there.
The same way I feel like I belong to him.
Pure contentment fills me and I laugh when he picks me up, spinning me around.
We both fall into a kiss that holds the promise of forever.
And true love.
* * *
The End
Doctor’s Orders: Nick (Sample)
Doctor’s Orders: Nick (Sample Only)
Medical Doctor Romance
* * *
By
Brittany Dreams
Introduction
He's my best friend. And now, he wants me to be my lover.
* * *
Nick Andrews is the stuff dreams are made of.
* * *
Insanely handsome, and so charming. It should be a crime.
* * *
He’s the playboy the women swoon over, and the ace of hearts.
* * *
We’ve been best friends from the dawn of time.
Him the celebrity football player, and me the doctor.
* * *
It worked perfectly because I knew we’d never be more than friends.
Even if I wanted more...
* * *
As the years went by I got good at keeping my feelings under control and stuck to the rules of friendship.
Until one drunken night changed it all.
That one night we broke the rules together, blurring the lines between friendship.
* * *
Now he wants more.
He wants me.
I want more too.
I want him.
Friends, or lovers?
The rules no longer apply to us.
* * *
But I know I shouldn’t be with the playboy.
* * *
I’ve been through too much heartache to play love’s fool again.
Can I trust my best friend not to break me?
Tania
“How about I see you tomorrow, and we can go over the options?” I say, pressing the phone to my ear.
Abby called me twice today already, and this is the third call. It’s going to have to be the last because I have a special evening planned. The kind where I’ll be thoroughly checking out to everyone on this planet, except my man.
“I just want it to be perfect,” she breathes, and I can just imagine her getting all worked up.
“It will be. I will make sure of it. Come tomorrow with the style choices and we can sit down and look over which will suit you best.”
She’s getting married in a little over two weeks. It’s so typical of her to keep changing her mind about her hairstyle. It’s also typical of her to go in to work tomorrow to make sure everything’s in order before she leaves for her very well-deserved one-month break. I swear this woman doesn’t know the meaning of the word vacation or break or even weekend. So, although she’s indecisive about her hair, I’m grateful she’ll be taking the month off.
“There’s so many hairst
yles to choose from. The one the stylist picked was nice, and I liked it at the time, I just don’t know if it’s what I want.” Her voice comes across all staticky on the line.
I smile to myself. It’s not funny. What I’m smiling about is her hair talk. We’re both doctors. While we both love to shop and make sure we’re into the latest on fashion, we work damn hard. Her more than me, and that’s saying something.
It’s nice hearing her talk about something other than blood work and X-rays.
So, I’ll give her this equally deserving carefree time to worry over things like her hair.
“Abby, I think you’re gonna be fine,” I assure her.
“Thanks so much. This is crazy stupid, isn’t it? Me worrying over hair. It’s just my hair. The wedding is the most important part. I should be freaking out about something that’s not hair,” she scoffs.
“Girl, get it together. How about you freak out over nothing and just be a bride who’s marrying a handsome prince?” I suggest and shuffle in my seat.
She sighs. “Yeah, I like the part about the handsome prince.”
Her husband-to-be is super-hot, so I don’t know why she’s worrying over hair. If it were me I would be planning my choice of lingerie for a two-week sex-fest of no work and no one bothering us.
She’s getting married to a marine lieutenant who’s the kind of guy all the women swoon over, but he makes sure his girl knows he only sees her swooning.
She definitely shouldn’t be worried about hair.
“Abby, I’m going now. I have my own man to please tonight. See you tomorrow,” I bubble, and she laughs.
“Okay, and thanks. You’re the best. Just so you know, though, I think I want my hair up.”
Dylan Page 16