Maddox laughed. “What did he say?”
“You know how Kade was. He straight out told me why he was buying hair dye. Pointed to the guy on the box too, just so I knew he wouldn’t buy ladies’ shit.”
Maddox closed his eyes, and concentrated on the feel of the breeze on his face. He looked out at the ocean. The sea went on and on and on. There was no end to it. Wherever it banked was thousands of miles from here, and whoever watched the same water he watched had no idea he existed. He was inconsequential to most of the world, but here, he wanted someone to need him. Not someone. Alex.
“I should’ve asked if you need me too.”
12
Of course she did, far more than she’d admit to him. She always would, but Alex knew that wasn’t what mattered. What mattered was that Maddox couldn’t ever be the man she needed him to be.
“I told you, Mad. We’re friends. We always will be. I just think we’ve reached the age where we have to stop using each other for sex.”
“Why?”
She laughed, but went on. “It’s time we both let each other go, so we can get out there and find the great loves of our lives, get married, make babies, and live happily ever after. Just like Brodie and Peyton are going to.”
“Is that what you want, Alex?”
“It is, and I can’t have that if I’m always falling back on you.”
“That’s how you see it?”
“That’s how it is. It always has been. I don’t have to put myself out there, because when I’m feeling lonely, I run back to you. You scratch my itches, and you make me feel all sexy. It can’t always be you, Mad. Someday I have to find someone who isn’t you.”
“You think I should find someone else too?”
“I do. Look at us. We’re in our thirties. You’re almost forty for Christ’s sake. We’ve had the same relationship for twenty years. One of us has to be mature enough to say it’s time we both move on. I been waitin’ on you to be the mature one, but at this point, I guess it’s all on me.”
Alex smiled, tried to joke with him, but inside she was dying. He hadn’t said he wanted to be the man she was looking for. He hadn’t said he wanted to be her great love, to marry her, and have babies with her. He hadn’t said anything.
“You can give this up, Al?” Maddox leaned over and ran his tongue up the side of her neck.
“What about this, baby?” He put his hand under her shirt, and squeezed her breast through her bra. His fingers played with her hardened nipple, while his tongue continued to torment her. He brought his hand back out from under her shirt, and gripped her chin. “What about this, Alex?”
He covered her mouth with his, and when she opened to him, his tongue did battle with hers. He brought her with him when he rested back on the sand, and rolled so she was on top of him.
“You feel me, Alex?”
She squeezed her eyes tight, willing the tears to stay inside where they belonged. When she knew they wouldn’t, she pushed off of him. “Stop it. This is what I’m talking about, Maddox.”
She took off in the direction of the steps, knowing that by the time she reached the top, she’d need to sit and rest before she walked home. It didn’t matter, she had to get away from him before she did what she always did, and fell right back into bed with him.
She gripped the wooden rail, and willed her body to give her the strength to make it to the top of the stairs, and then the strength not to succumb to the way Maddox Butler made her feel.
On the fifth step, she felt him behind her. Maddox swept her up and carried her to the top, as though she didn’t weigh an ounce. Being in his arms, feeling his strength, was everything she wanted in life. But she also wanted his heart. Without it, she’d never be happy, and if she wasn’t happy, she’d make Maddox miserable.
They walked back to the house without speaking. Maddox would’ve, if he could’ve figured out what to say. But what was there? Alex told him she wanted to find the great love of her life. That had to mean it wasn’t him. He knew that, or should have, considering she’d never told him she loved him.
He was her itch-scratcher. The guy who made Alex feel good. Was that how it had always been?
Instead of feeling boxed in, unable to fight, as he’d always believed, the reality was she used him when she was lonely. All these years he thought he had her number, but boy was he wrong. He didn’t know Alex Avila at all. What a schmuck.
No more, though. He could move on too. There were plenty of women who thought he was happily ever after material. Plenty. But he’d always held back for Alex. Alex was the only woman who slept in his bed. Alex was the only woman who parked in his barn. Alex was the only woman as comfortable in his house as he was. It was never what he believed it to be though.
That’s why she said no when he asked her to move in with him. It wasn’t because she was scared, it was because she didn’t want to.
“Maddox—”
“Don’t, Alex. I get it, okay? Time to move on. You’re convenient, and so am I.”
Maddox walked ahead of her, relieved to see Naughton in the driveway. “You ready to go?”
“Yeah. Everything okay?”
“Never better,” he answered, just as Alex walked past him. “Right, Al?”
She didn’t answer, didn’t even look at him. If things were the way they had been even a month ago, she would’ve flipped him off at least.
“What was that?” Naught asked.
“Nothing.”
“Bullshit.”
“What do you want me to tell you, Naught? You wanna hear how Alex Avila just crapped all over me?”
Naught shook his head. “You do it to each other.”
“Not anymore.”
They drove to the vineyard on Old Creek Road in silence, the same way he and Alex walked back to Peyton’s house. Maddox had nothing to say, and Naughton—he never had anything to say.
Peyton was waiting for her when she came back inside. “Alex?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you okay?”
“Nope.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
Alex turned around from where she stood near the front window. Brodie was nowhere in sight.
“Brodie left,” Peyton explained. “He drove down to the beach, picked up the boys, and took them back to his parents’ place so they can ride this afternoon.”
Of course he did. Because Brodie was the perfect f’ing guy. It wasn’t Peyton’s fault, but there was no way Alex could be around her right now. Peyton had everything Alex wanted in life, and being with her just made Alex’s heart hurt more.
“I gotta go. I’m really glad everything worked out with Lang. I would’ve hated to see him get a minute with those sweet boys.”
“I don’t know. Maybe—”
“I’ll see ya, Peyton,” Alex said on her way out the door. “I’ll call you later.”
“Wait.” Peyton came out the door after her. “Where are you going?”
“Home. I gotta get some rest.” Alex was in her car and out the driveway before Peyton could say anything else.
Enough with worrying about other people. It was time Alex focused on herself and her family.
Eli left this morning without telling her where he was going. Gabe wasn’t returning her phone calls, and neither was Joaquin. If what Eli told her this morning was true, their family’s winery, their heritage, was in jeopardy, and somehow it was Kade Butler’s fault. He was keeping pretty busy, for a dead guy.
Instead of going home, Alex drove to Los Caballeros. She intended to get to the bottom of whatever the hell was going on with their bond, and see if she could get it fixed before they lost everything.
“Where do you want to start?” Maddox asked.
“At the top.” Naughton showed Maddox a rough outline of how he envisioned utilizing the four hundred acres they owned between them. Thirty acres would be set aside for Maddox to have a barn with stables for horses if he wanted them.
By Naught’s estimat
ions, it would take three to five years before the first vineyards they planted would yield enough fruit for adequate production. By year six or seven, he believed most of the three hundred seventy acres would be fully planted with fruit-producing vines.
“Most of the other three hundred acres are plantable, according to Lena.”
The first five years would be tough, but once they reached full production, a conservative net income estimate was between two and three million a year, just from the four hundred acres they had now.
Owning their land outright gave them plenty of collateral to finance the initial phases of Naughton’s plan. Their production would be twice that of Butler Ranch. If they added the other three hundred acres, it would be almost four times as much.
Instead of purchasing the remaining land at this time, Maddox would propose Lena give them first right of refusal.
Taking on another winery operation would require a significant amount of time and money. To get things underway, they’d need a large labor force to get the vineyards into production as quickly as possible.
“You done overthinking everything yet? If you are, let’s get to work.”
They were headed back to Maddox’s truck, when Lena approached.
“You two have been head-to-head out in this heat for over an hour. Can I get you something to drink?”
“You been watchin’ us, Lena?” Maddox winked. If he was going to move on from Alex Avila, he would take advantage of flirting whenever he was in the presence of a woman who appealed to him. While she definitely wasn’t his type, Lena Hess was an extraordinarily attractive woman, and was probably just as lonely as he was going to be.
“I can see everything, Maddox. Best not to forget that.”
“You say you can see everything. Do you know anything about the wine barrels stored in the caves?”
Lena shook her head, but there was something in the way she blinked several times in rapid succession, and her eyes darted back and forth, that led Maddox to believe she knew something she didn’t want him to know she knew.
“How ’bout that drink?” Naughton said to Lena, who appeared stunned by Maddox’s question.
“Of course. What would you like? Lemonade, water, or something stronger?”
Maddox definitely wanted something stronger, but now wasn’t a good time for it. He and Naughton had a lot of work to do, and for that, he’d need his wits about him. As hot as it was going to be today, alcohol would go straight to his head.
“Water’s good. Thanks, Lena.”
“Naughton?”
“Same, thanks.”
Lena went inside, but neither he nor Naught followed.
“She knows something,” Naught murmured.
“Damn right she does.”
“She’s protecting somebody. Who do you think it is, Mad?”
“No idea.”
“I was hoping she’d tell us where the barrels came from, and there wouldn’t be anything sinister behind it.”
“Me too, Brother.”
If this land didn’t mean the fulfillment of his dreams as a winemaker, Maddox might consider walking away from it. In the days since he’d found out about it, things both in his life and with this property kept getting weirder and weirder. Maybe the land was cursed.
Alex sat in her mother’s kitchen, not knowing what to do next. She’d expected to find Gabe here, working in the vineyards or the winery, but the field manager said he hadn’t been there since Friday. It wasn’t unusual for him to take the weekend off, especially at this time of the year, but if they were in trouble, why would he stay away? They all needed to come together and fix whatever was wrong.
Elias wasn’t here, not that she expected him to be, but Alex certainly expected to see Joaquin, who wasn’t here either.
Her mother showed no sign of worry or concern, which put Alex in a difficult position. Did she ask her mother if she was aware of any issues?
“Mama, where is everyone?”
“I don’t know, Mija. Who are you looking for?”
“Gabe, Eli, Joaquin.”
“Have you tried calling them?”
Alex nodded, deciding she wouldn’t say more. She wished she’d remembered to ask Maddox this morning if he’d talked to Gabe, but with everything else going on, she forgot.
Obviously he hadn’t, or Maddox would’ve said something to her. Or would he? He hadn’t told her about the Old Creek Road property, and that had to be the biggest thing that had ever happened to him.
Her mother stood behind her, and ran her fingers through Alex’s hair. “What’s troubling you, Mija?”
“Everything is changing.”
“That’s life, isn’t it?”
“I’m thirty-two years old, and nothing has changed in my life other than Papa dying. Now all of a sudden everything is different.”
“Everything?”
“Peyton, Brodie, Maddox, Gabe, Eli, even Kade.”
“What has changed with your brothers?”
Alex shrugged. “They aren’t here.”
“They don’t live here, Mija. They haven’t for a long time. Why don’t you tell me what’s really going on? There’s something sitting right beneath the surface, what is it?”
Her mother cut right to the quick of what was really wrong.
“I thought I was pregnant, Mama.” Alex put her face in her hands and cried. “I wanted to be pregnant.”
Her mother was at least six inches shorter than Alex, but she sat and pulled her onto her lap anyway, rocking her back and forth.
“Shh, Mija,” she murmured again and again.
When Alex stopped crying, she moved back over to the chair she’d been sitting in.
“How does Maddox feel about you not being pregnant?”
Alex was stunned that her mother would ask, but she really shouldn’t have been. The woman had seven children. She probably saw a lot more than she acknowledged to any of them.
“I’m not sure. When I thought I was, he said he was happy. Those weren’t his exact words, but he said he wanted the baby.”
“And when you told him you weren’t?”
“He didn’t really say. I guess he was disappointed, but I wonder if he was really more relieved.”
“I doubt that.”
“Why, Mama? What do you and Peyton see that I don’t?”
“Maddox loves you, Alex. He has for years.”
“No, Mama, you’re wrong. Maddox has never loved me.”
“No less than you love him.”
“Do I? I told Papa I did. I went to Moonstone Beach yesterday and let the sand run through my fingers. I told him I wished he’d known Maddox, and what a good man he is. Maddox saved us after Papa died, and I just wish…” She couldn’t continue, she was crying too hard.
“He knew, Mija.”
“I know you believe Papa looks down on us, but I wish he really knew, Mama.”
“He knew you were in love with Maddox.”
“What?”
“Do you think your Papa and I are blind?”
“No, but why didn’t you ever say anything? Why didn’t Papa?”
“I told you, Alex. Your father knew Maddox was a good man.”
“Why didn’t he—”
“Make amends with Laird Butler?”
Alex nodded.
“You tell me how it would’ve gone. Tell me the story of your papa and Laird Butler setting aside their differences and becoming friends.”
It never could’ve happened. Her father was too proud, and so was Laird. Neither would’ve extended the olive branch. Even if Maddox found a way to bring the two families together, Alex doubted that anything short of a disaster in both their vineyards could have bridged the gap between the two men.
“There he is,” her mother said, looking out the window.
“Who?”
“Gabriel.”
Alex ran out the back door, slamming it behind her.
“¡Por dios!” she heard her mother shout.
&nbs
p; Gabe got out of his truck, but didn’t look at her. “Alex.”
“What’s going on, Gabe? Where’s Eli, and why did you come looking for Maddox last night?”
“Did Eli come see you?”
“He did, and he told me we’re in trouble. How bad is it?”
“Follow me,” he barked. “You think you want to know, but I assure you, you don’t.”
13
Maddox and Naughton spent hours roaming the Old Creek Road property, discussing their options, estimating costs, determining which of the vineyards Naughton would try to save, and which they’d replant.
If Maddox had to guess, he’d say they walked ten miles today, easily. A lot, given four hundred acres was only a little over a half a square mile. Even then, there was land they hadn’t covered, and something significant he hadn’t found yet.
He and Naughton agreed that the northernmost one hundred acre vineyards, which also sat at the highest elevation, would be dedicated to various Pinot Noir clones, as well as Sauvignon Blanc.
Moving southwest on the property, the next vineyards would be planted with Cabernet Sauvignon, Cabernet Franc, Merlot, and Syrah.
Furthest south, and also at the lowest elevation, they’d plant Chardonnay and Zinfandel.
Smaller vineyards scattered around the property would be dedicated to Petit Verdot, Grenache, and Carignan, as well as Roussane and Viognier.
Maddox was equally exhausted physically and mentally, yet throughout the day his mind drifted back to his conversation with Alex.
Roaming the land at Butler Ranch always gave him clarity, and a sense of peace. It was no different walking this land.
Thinking Alex was pregnant did a number on him. Maddox began envisioning things he’d never considered. The same had to be true for her. Maybe that was where the “find the love of her life” stuff was coming from.
She had been through a lot in the last two weeks. She helped Peyton and Brodie get back together, thought she was pregnant, found out she wasn’t, and had major surgery. She also said that Cris told her it would take some time for the effects of the anesthesia to wear off.
He’d give her some space. It wasn’t as though either one of them were going to fall in love and marry someone else tomorrow.
The Truce (Butler Ranch Book 2) Page 11