Alena didn’t want to touch anything. Somehow she thought if she handled as few items as possible, it would be less real. She had no intention of staying in this safe house overnight. Hours, maybe. Days, no.
Ivan would be livid. She could picture him pacing somewhere, flames coming out of his ears. He’d probably already injured his fist by punching a hole in the wall.
And what would he think of the safe house? She knew she didn’t want to stay. She was only there now because she had no other choices until either Belinda or Taylor arrived. She needed answers first. But what would Ivan say? If he hadn’t decided to rid himself of her, he might insist she stay there. He was Mr. Safety. He might chain her to the bed in the safe house and not let her move a muscle until Yenin was caught.
Meanwhile she had to continually remind herself this was not another prison sentence. The idea of being holed up somewhere once again made her skin crawl. It seemed like every time she turned around she faced another prison sentence of one form or another, voluntary or otherwise. She was tired of hiding. Tired of running. Just bone tired. And now she was also alone.
She picked up the borrowed clothes and put them on quickly. Panties, bra, sweatpants, long-sleeved tee. Easy items to fit just about anyone close to her size. Comfortable. Warm.
Again she felt better.
Part of her wanted to pull the covers back on the bed and climb in. She wanted to close her eyes, will sleep to take her under, and spend the time dozing while waiting for word from Taylor. How long was it going to take for Taylor to arrive? Where was Belinda?
But she knew she would never be able to sleep with her adrenaline still pumping like it was. And she didn’t want to sleep in that bed. Not touching it was somehow symbolic of her refusal to accept this arrangement.
She had no choice for the time being. She had no contact with the outside world. No phone. Nothing. And she wasn’t stupid enough to walk out the door. Besides, the agents posted out front would never let her get away easily. They would be on the phone in seconds with someone higher up, and they would catch Alena just as fast on foot.
She shuddered to consider how much more livid Ivan or Mikhail would be if she put herself in danger yet again today.
She was stuck.
Waiting.
Eventually she curled up on one end of the couch with her head on the armrest and stared at the door. She had no interest in turning on the television. She wanted to hear every noise in the hall and know when someone was approaching.
She closed her eyes and waited.
That had been hours ago.
It was dark when Belinda walked into the apartment. Eshan brought her, and he left immediately.
Belinda was a wreck, worse than Alena. And that was saying something.
“What happened?” Alena asked. “Where have you been? What’s going on?” She swallowed and then continued. “What the hell were you thinking?”
Belinda flopped on the other end of the couch from Alena. She tipped her head back and stared at the ceiling. “When I left the clinic? I was thinking there was no way in hell the FBI was going to defuse the situation with Rena before the five o’clock deadline.” She met Alena’s gaze. “I panicked. I brought this to my family’s doorstep. I needed to fix it.”
“You know that isn’t true. It’s not your fault.”
Belinda shrugged. “The question is, why the hell did you follow me? Isn’t Mikhail livid? Ivan too?”
At that Alena shrugged also. “I haven’t spoken to either of them. I’ve been here pulling out my hair for hours. I have no phone. I didn’t even take my cell with me from the clinic.”
“I’m so sorry.” Belinda reached out a hand and squeezed Alena’s briefly.
“And I followed you on instinct. I couldn’t let you go alone.”
“You should have. I heard you even took a gun.” She lifted a brow.
Alena smiled. “I’m a poor shot, but maybe I got things moving. Who knows, maybe I saved a life?”
“It’s possible.”
“Where have you been until now?”
“I was at another safe house. Taylor isn’t too happy with me either, but she took the opportunity to attempt to make something out of my stupidity.”
“How?”
“The other safe house was a ruse, a decoy to lure out the mole in the FBI. Taylor’s plan. She set it up so only a select few people knew where I was, hoping they would tell Yenin.”
“Why?”
“If Yenin or his men show up at some point and attempt to capture me there, then Taylor will know who the mole is.”
“She’s that confident?”
“Apparently. We stayed there long enough to be believable, and then she and I snuck out. When we got a few blocks away, Patel picked me up and brought me here. Taylor stayed nearby to organize the sting.”
Alena was shocked. That seemed like a lot of risk.
There was a long silence before Belinda tilted her head toward Alena and smiled. “Thank you.”
Alena nodded. “Now what?”
“Now we wait. Taylor will call.”
»»•««
Ivan paced the apartment floor, running his hands through his hair. By all rights there should be no threads left in the carpet nor hair on his head. It had been hours since they had any news at all.
Nikolav was no better. He paced the other side of the couch most of the time, except when he screamed at the wall.
All of them had gathered at the clinic earlier to understand what had happened to the women all morning. Waiting at the clinic had been useless. And when it got late, Ivan and Nikolav went back to their apartment. To wait. And wait some more.
The hours spent at the clinic hadn’t been uneventful, however, and Ivan flexed his hand a few times as a reminder. He’d punched a hole through the wall in one of Katie’s exam rooms. He would need to fix that. Sooner rather than later.
Nikolav had called Taylor three times, but it had gone to voice mail every time.
Ivan rubbed his forehead as he headed toward the kitchen counter to pour another cup of coffee. His fourth. He lifted his mug toward Nikolav with a brow raised.
Nikolav shook him off. “I can’t drink anymore of that shit. I’m going to vomit.”
Ivan’s hand was not steady, and after he took a sip of the thickened brew, he set it on the counter in disgust. It had been in the pot too long. “I’m going to lose my mind.”
“Lost mine about six hours ago,” Nikolav responded without glancing at Ivan. “What the fuck were those two thinking?”
“I don’t know. I have to assume Belinda didn’t trust the FBI to save her cousin. She did go to Taylor first. She must not have liked the response she got. I’m not going to excuse her decision. It was reckless and dangerous. But in her shoes, would you have done differently?”
“Fuck yes,” Nikolav jerked his head up. “I would have called my boyfriend first before taking off alone to cross the city on a wild goose chase that had the likely outcome of death.” His voice was high-pitched and loud.
Ivan pursed his lips for a second, giving Nikolav a chance to calm down. And then he continued. “So, you’re telling me if someone you loved was being held by Anton Yenin against their will, and that jackass threatened their life if you didn’t exchange it for yours, you would have simply let them die.” He wasn’t asking a question.
Nikolav glared at Ivan for a moment, and then his shoulders slumped. He didn’t say anything.
Ivan wasn’t any happier about what the women did than Nikolav. He was simply trying to imagine why Belinda made the decision she made. As for Alena… God, he didn’t know what to let himself think. He wavered back and forth between wanting to scream at her for hours on end and wanting to haul her into his arms and never let her go.
If he had been able to speak to her six hours ago, or even two hours ago, he doubted he would have been even a tiny bit rational in his response. But every minute the clock moved forward, he eased from wanting to throttle her to
wanting to wrap her in his embrace.
Fear had ruled the day. Fear that she would get herself killed. Fear that Anton would grab her from somewhere. Fear that the so-called safe house was anything but safe.
Fear made him angry. As it faded, he grew anxious. Now he wanted to be able to touch her, hear her voice, hold her.
“I’m just saying, I think we need to be a little less irate when we finally get reunited.”
“We?” Nikolav raised an eyebrow.
Ivan blew out a breath.
“You’re with Alena, aren’t you?”
Ivan met his gaze. “Yes. But that’s not the issue. All I’m suggesting is that screaming at them half-cocked is probably not going to earn us any brownie points.”
“Who said anything about screaming? I plan to make myself perfectly understood with my palm against Belinda’s ass.”
Ivan shook his head, chuckling slightly for the first time all day. “Let me know how that goes over.”
“You don’t think I’ll do it?”
“Oh, I know you will. We’ve been friends for over a decade. I’m super clear on where your tastes lie. But don’t pretend you’re going to drag that woman over your knee against her will. I know you better than that. You might very well spank her, but not before getting her permission and not without ensuring she loves it enough to beg you to do it the next time.” He chuckled again.
“Ugh.” Nikolav threw his hands in the air. “Women…” He turned and stomped from the room, probably to pace another section of the apartment.
Ivan lowered onto the couch, setting his elbows on his knees and his forehead against his palms. He had no doubt Nikolav probably would spank Belinda. And in another life, Ivan would have been itching to do the same thing. But not with Alena.
He didn’t know how to explain it, but he knew she was too fragile for that level of dominance. Physically and emotionally. If someone had asked him two months ago if he pictured himself with a woman who didn’t beg for a flogging, he would have said hell no. But now?
Now was different. If he was honest with himself, he’d known Alena was his almost from the moment he met her. And he’d also known she wasn’t the type to endure that side of BDSM. Bondage she could do. She’d proven that already. But she needed to know it was for her pleasure, not to fill his need for sadism.
In fact, that need had flown out the window as soon as the breath of fresh air that was Alena stepped into his life. He wanted her with a passion he’d never experienced. Nothing else mattered. Not even his previous desire to bring a woman pleasure from spanking and flogging.
He asked himself, why? What had changed? And the answer was plain as day. Because pleasure was always the goal. A submissive who derived pleasure from having her ass swatted made him groan aloud with the need to come. But if the woman wasn’t into it, the appeal fled. And Alena would not be into that sort of thing.
Ivan leaned back against the couch and closed his eyes. He was exhausted and scared out of his mind. And he needed to remind himself for the fiftieth time that when he next spoke to Alena, the best approach was not going to be anger.
Deep calming breaths, Ivan. Deep calming breaths…
»»•««
Anton tossed his cell on the couch with gritted teeth. “Fuck. Fuck,” he screamed to the empty room. It was the middle of the goddamn night. Not a single word from anyone. He hadn’t been able to reach the team of men hired to snatch Belinda Gallo from the first safe house, and he hadn’t heard a word from either Dayton or Millings about the location of the second safe house.
Where the hell were those two? He’d spoken to Dayton earlier in the day and had watched across the street for Belinda to be kidnapped only to have the entire plan blow up in his face. And he was fucking pissed.
Whatever went wrong, he would never know, but it would appear he’d been set up. As if the FBI knew he was planning the raid and had SWAT standing ready nearby to take down Anton’s men.
Fuck them.
Fuck the fucking FBI and the FSB. They were both getting on his nerves and way too close for comfort.
It was time to stop worrying about the goddamn fighters and their women. They were heavily guarded at all times. He needed to turn his attention to his own problems, namely how to ensure the drug he’d been developing for the last two decades was ready for personal use and then getting it marketable.
In a matter of months, he would have more money than he knew what to do with, but that wouldn’t do him a bit of good if he wasn’t alive and healthy enough himself to enjoy it.
Tomorrow was Friday. Or today rather, seeing as it was past midnight. He would head to the lab, get a handle on what he needed to do next, and make a plan. First on his list—contracting Hep A.
Chapter Eighteen
“Baby, what am I going to do with you?” Those were the first words out of Ivan’s mouth the moment Belinda handed Alena the secure phone. It was late. After midnight. She’d waited entirely too long to hear his voice. And she was relieved he didn’t immediately start yelling at her.
A new set of tears ran down her cheeks as she shut the bedroom door of the stupid safe house and leaned against it to slide down to the floor. She put her forehead to her knees as his voice soothed.
She was sure he had been pissed, and he would undoubtedly read her the riot act later, but at least he didn’t jump right in yelling. She wasn’t sure she could have taken it by that point. She was too frazzled.
“Alena? Honey? You okay?”
“Yeah…” She breathed out that word. She wasn’t able to say anything else just yet without sobbing again, and she didn’t want him to think she was as fragile as she currently felt.
“When I heard you got shot…” His voice rose, but he stopped himself.
She smiled and lifted her face to wipe the tears away on the back of her free hand. “I’m fine. Just a scratch.” It actually throbbed, but she was ignoring it.
“You can’t stay there.”
That was the best thing she’d heard in hours. She and Belinda had discussed everything that happened throughout the day while they’d been separated. They’d even discussed Alena’s relationship with Ivan, which apparently wasn’t nearly as secret as she’d assumed. The women at least were pretty tuned in, even if the men weren’t.
She smiled.
“Alena?” His voice dipped lower, softer, sweeter. “You with me?”
“Yes.”
“You sure you’re okay? You haven’t said anything.”
“I’m enjoying your voice. Keep talking.” She was. She closed her eyes and willed him to continue speaking. After so many hours and worrying about him being furious, she just wanted to listen.
He chuckled. Deep. The sound made her stomach clamp. She wanted his hands on her while he made that sound. She wanted to see his face.
“At the risk of seriously pissing you off, I mean it. You can’t stay there. I won’t be able to sit down or stop pacing until I have you in my arms. I know you’re probably safer there, and you might have some wild notion that you’re keeping me safe by staying, but you can’t.”
She smiled broader. At least she wasn’t going to have to argue this point with him.
He kept talking. “You scared the hell out of me. And I’m still trying to wrap my mind around what you were thinking, but you can’t stay there,” he said for the third time.
She couldn’t stop a fresh wave of tears.
“Alena, I mean it. I need you with me.”
She was too choked to respond.
“Babe?”
“Yeah…”
“Alena…”
“I know. I’m not staying.”
“Really?” He sounded elated. His voice pitched high. “I don’t have to break anyone’s arm tonight?”
She giggled. “No. I’ll leave with Belinda. She’s not staying, either.”
He released a long breath that made her grin again through the silent tears.
“Someone will bring me home.” Why d
id it seem like a year since she’d been to the apartment? She’d left just this morning.
“Thank God.”
“I’ll see you in a little while.”
“Okay. Be careful. I’m not going to breathe right until you’re here.”
“Me neither.”
Belinda knocked on her door. “Alena? You coming?”
“Gotta go. See you soon.”
»»•««
Ivan was pacing the apartment when the knock sounded at the door. He didn’t even glance through the peephole before he swung it open and yanked Alena inside. The man behind her nodded at him, waved, and walked away.
Ivan kicked the door shut as he hauled her into his embrace and buried his face in her hair. He inhaled slowly, ensuring himself she was real and in his arms. Her shampoo didn’t smell right, but it was her. She was alive and real and back home.
After rocking her back and forth for several seconds, he gripped her head and leaned it back to look into her eyes. “Don’t you ever do something like that again.”
She nodded.
“I mean it. You took years off the end of my life.”
“I know,” she muttered.
Did she? Did she have any idea how insane he’d been with worry? He yanked her against his chest and held her tighter as he inched her backward so he could lock the door and set the alarm. And then he flattened her to the door and took her mouth.
The kiss wasn’t like any other they’d shared. It was desperate. Full of everything he wanted to say and couldn’t, shouldn’t, or wouldn’t. He didn’t want to yell at her. There was no need. And he didn’t want to hurt her feelings or fight with her, either.
He needed to say more, to impress upon her how stupid her plan had been.
When he pulled away an inch, releasing her swollen lips, she whispered, “I’m sorry.”
“Baby… What were you thinking? Why on earth did you take off after Belinda?”
“I was so scared for Belinda. I acted fast. I didn’t stop to think. I grabbed Leo’s gun from Katie’s desk and rushed after her. I didn’t even take my phone.”
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