by JL Paul
Jamie scooted his chair closer, his brow furrowed, frown on his lips. “Did he hit you or something?”
She laughed manically and the sound curdled her own blood. “I’d kick his ass.”
He cracked a tiny smile. “Yeah, I know you’re some sort of superwoman, but you better let me know if anyone ever hits you. I know you think you can take on anyone but I still want you to tell me if someone ever touches you.”
She smiled softly and patted his hand, her heart filling with love for her favorite cousin. She nodded and watched a couple of girls dancing close to the stage trying to get RJ’s attention. “It’s nothing like that,” she said quietly, not certain if she should say anything more.
“Did he try something with you last night?” Jamie persisted.
She whipped her head around to face him. “No. He wasn’t even in our room until nearly dawn.” She was horrified to feel tears building up behind her eyes. She rose from her seat, nearly knocking her chair over, eager to make a quick getaway. But Jamie was on her in a heartbeat. He grabbed her arm and dragged her to the lobby. He forced her into a chair and made her talk.
***
Cole was relieved when they finally finished the last set. He accepted a bottled water from one of the waitresses as he jumped from the stage and sought out Jamie. He’d witnessed Ally’s dramatic exit and Jamie’s return without her and had had a hard time concentrating on his music.
Jamie rushed to him and grabbed his arm. “Where is she?” Cole asked.
Jamie shook his head and pushed his friend back to the drum kit. “I’ll help you take it down,” he said. Puzzled, Cole climbed back onstage with Jamie and bent his head over the cymbals. In quiet whispers, Jamie told Cole everything Ally had confessed to him in the lobby.
***
Ally, fresh from a long, hot shower, turned the lights out and crawled between the sheets. She was totally exhausted after having little sleep the night before and hoped sleep would find her immediately and not allow her to think about Cole or what he would be up to that night.
But sleep eluded her as it had the night before as Jamie’s words ran through her mind instead. He’d told her over and over that Cole had been in RJ’s room with the rest of the guys most of the night, playing cards and celebrating a great gig. Yeah, he had confessed that Cole hadn’t come up with them right away, but he hadn’t mentioned what had kept him.
He had then taken her hand and asked her if she had feelings for Cole. She’d denied it hotly, making up lame excuses as to why she was so angry. She’d been pretty sure that Jamie hadn’t bought any of her lies but she wasn’t overly concerned. She’d be back to school the next day and could easily avoid Cole there.
She tossed and turned, flopping from back to stomach to side to side until well after eleven. She had hoped to be sound asleep before Cole came back to the room but of course luck was against her.
“Get up, Al,” he ordered, storming through the door and flipping on the lights.
She sat up, shielding her eyes. “Leave me alone, Cole. Go sleep with your buddies.”
He sat next to her and pulled her hands from her eyes, his face contorted in rage. “You thought I was with that girl all night last night?”
She turned her head and whipped her hands out of his clasp. “I don’t know. I wasn’t there. Thank God.”
He gripped her chin and forced her eyes to his furious brown ones. “I didn’t sleep with her and I can’t believe you’d think that lowly of me. Damn, Al, what kind of person do you think I am?”
She couldn’t answer as shame warred with anger and jealousy. She just didn’t know what she thought. “Sorry,” she mumbled, hardly convincing.
“I talked to that chick for a little while but that was all. She was just interested in us because she’s a big fan of Tight Control. She was hitting on me, sure, but she wasn’t interested in me, per se.” His eyes flashed anger again. “And even if that wasn’t true – even if she did want to hook up with me, do you honestly think I would do that?”
“I don’t know what I was thinking,” she snapped, twisting her head in an effort to remove her chin from his grasp. He held harder.
“I talked to her for about an hour, I guess, and then went up to RJ’s room. They told me that you were tired and went to bed so I didn’t want to disturb you. I hung out with the guys and played cards.”
“I know,” she whispered, her eyes starting to water. He finally released her and she ducked her head, not wanting him to see the shame in her eyes. “I’m sorry.”
“Al,” he said, desperation in his voice. “Why does this matter so much to you, huh? You’ve never been so mad at me over some chick.”
She lifted her head and met his gaze, her bottom lip trembling. “I…umm…I didn’t want you…messing…with her.”
“That’s not going to fly. I’m not buying that at all.” He stroked her cheek, his eyes softening. “What’s the problem, Al?”
She rose abruptly and wrapped her arms around her torso, her heart teetering on the edge of a deep precipice, not sure which way to go.
“Al?” he said as he approached her from behind. He placed a soft hand on her shoulder. “Talk to me, please.”
She turned to face him, fear and excitement thundering in her veins. She grabbed hold of his shirt, fisting the material, and pulled him closer. A bit of shock shot through his eyes but she was determined to do this – to let him know.
“I wanted it to be me,” she said, firmly, then locked her hands behind his neck and yanked his lips to hers. She kissed him timidly at first until he sighed and wound his arms around her waist. His move built her courage and she deepened the kiss, allowing her fingers to tangle in the ends of his hair. He tightened his hold and returned her kiss, making her heart beat so hard she was afraid it would totally tire out and she’d need a shock to get it going again.
His hands rubbed soft, gentle circles on her back while urging her closer as he continued to kiss her, building her hope. Maybe he’d changed his mind. Maybe he felt the same way. Maybe they’d be able to work something out. Maybe…
“Stop, Al,” he said mumbled against her mouth as he gently extricated himself from her arms. She blinked slowly, trying to comprehend what he said. He smiled at her and stroked her cheek. “We need to stop.”
“But I don’t want to stop,” she protested, her lips still humming from his kiss.
His eyes turned sympathetic and it stabbed her heart, slowing its rate and freezing her blood. “We can’t do this.”
“Why not?” she persisted, holding tightly to her strength, not wanting to dissolve into a puddle of emotion at his feet.
He backed up and plopped on the bed, pulling her beside him. “Because, Al. We’ve talked about this before, remember?”
She slapped his hands away and pushed her hair out of her face. “No, we didn’t. You just said we can’t do this, that’s all. I want to know why. Don’t you want to be with me? Or are all these feelings one-sided?”
He closed his eyes and groaned, falling to his back. “It’s more complicated than that and you know it.”
“No, I don’t,” she huffed.
“I told you,” he said as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “I need to concentrate on the band right now. And if we did do this, what happens next year while you’re still in school and I’m not? What if the band makes it and we’re out of town all the time?” He sat up and snatched her hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “Or what happens if we try this and it doesn’t work. What happens to our friendship? Our friendship with each other and with RJ and Jamie?”
She got up off the bed and walked to the window, parting the curtains to stare at the night. “My mom and dad were best friends and look at them. They love you, Cole, like a son. And you’re dad, I’m pretty sure, loves me. My mom dated my dad her last year of school and he was in a band. They were constantly separated yet they found a way to make it work. And as far as our friends go, I think they’d stick by us no matter what, eve
n if this thing between us didn’t work, which I’m willing to bet my inheritance that it will.”
“Al,” he groaned sitting up and running his hands through his hair. “You’re not listening to me.”
“And you’re not listening to me,” she said as she whirled around to face him, eyes ablaze. She paused and sucked in a breath, her hand flying to her mouth. “Oh, wait. You’re letting me down easy, aren’t you? You’re not attracted to me so you’re making excuses.”
“No,” he said as he sprang to his feet and crossed the room. “I would never lie to you about something like this. Ever.” He gripped her shoulders and forced her to look in his eyes. “Al, I’m being totally honest with you, here. I care about you, you know that. I don’t want to see you hurt.”
“Maybe I’m hurt now,” she said, cringing at her pitiful voice. She hated begging but she just couldn’t help herself. All the confusing feelings and raging emotions were finally coming to a head and she needed to get it all out.
He lifted his eyes to the ceiling, sucking in a deep breath. She knew he was trying to hang on to his patience – trying to keep things together. “Al, I don’t want to hurt you and I’m afraid that’s what will happen. Don’t you understand that? I’m trying to protect you!”
A couple tears finally escaped from her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. She planted her palms on his chest and shoved him away, anger pounding in her ears. “Well you’re doing a pretty horrible job,” she said before slamming the bathroom door and locking herself inside. A few minutes later, after she heard the room door open and close, did the real tears surface as she slid to the floor.
Chapter Seven
The next week dragged by horribly. Cole’s mood had not improved at all since Sunday and he couldn’t wait for the weekend so he could go home and talk to his dad.
He’d left the hotel room Saturday night after it became apparent Ally wasn’t going to come out of the bathroom while he was around. He’d walked around the hotel for over an hour, hoping to give Ally enough time to cool down. By the time he’d returned, she’d been tucked in her bed with the lights off, sleeping. Or at least she’d been pretending to be asleep. He’d just crawled into bed and listened to her soft cries, wanting nothing more but to comfort her. But he hadn’t trusted himself to touch her again so he’d pulled his own fake sleep act and stayed where he was.
She’d refused to speak to him at all the next morning and had insisted on driving home with Jamie. And once they’d all returned to school, she’d collected her things and disappeared in her dorm. He hadn’t seen her since. RJ and Jamie had pestered him about what had happened and all he had told them was that they’d argued again and she’d cool off soon.
“Cole,” Jennifer Mansfeld called out, stopping him from reaching the music building. She smiled and grabbed his arm. “You still haven’t told me if we were going to the Fall Festival dance together.”
He rolled his eyes and held in a breath. He definitely wasn’t in the mood to deal with her – he already had a headache forming behind his eyes. “I told you I probably wasn’t going.”
“Exactly. You said probably not definitely.” She did a sort of flirty knee bend thing, beaming at him the entire time. She was pretty, sure, with chestnut hair and hazel eyes, but she paled in comparison to Ally.
He shrugged and continued walking, hoping to shake her off or force her to get the hint. She was undeterred, though, and kept up with his fast pace.
“I have already turned down two guys because I thought for sure we’d go.” She looped her arm through the crook of his and he knew she wasn’t going to let him off that easily.
Suddenly, images of Ally dressed in a long, flowing skirt and dancing in his arms flooded his mind. Everything reminded him of her lately and he desperately wanted it to stop. He released a long sigh, looked at Jennifer and nodded. “Fine. We’ll go. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have practice.” He brushed past her and missed the triumphant look in her eyes.
His cell phone rang as he entered the music building, his heels echoing off the floor and bouncing off the walls. He checked the screen and he smiled for the first time in days.
“Hey, Dad. What’s up?”
“Done with classes?” Nate Crawford asked.
“Yeah. I’m waiting for the other guys to meet me for practice. How was L.A.?” He pushed open the music room door and dropped down on the piano bench, forcing Ally’s face from his mind.
“Same old, same old.” Nate took a deep breath. “You’re still coming home this weekend, right?”
“Yeah. Is something the matter?” he asked, his heart pausing for the answer.
“No, not at all. I just want to talk to you about something. It’s not bad news, I promise.”
But Cole wasn’t reassured. He could tell something was on his dad’s mind and he hoped that Nate hadn’t been lying to him – he hoped it truly wasn’t bad news. “Okay. Umm, I might have to give Ally and Alec a ride.”
“That’s perfect, actually,” Nate said. “Liz is setting up some kind of dinner thing for everyone since you kids will be home and we’ll be hitting the road soon. You know how Liz gets.”
Cole smiled as he pictured Ally’s mom. “Yeah, I know. She can’t ever resist the urge to get us all together. Is Stacy going to be there?”
“Yes,” Nate answered slowly. “Is that all right?”
“Of course. Why wouldn’t it be?” Cole asked, lifting a shoulder his dad couldn’t see. He glanced at the clock hanging over the door, wondering vaguely where RJ, Ren, and Parker were. He sighed. “Dad, I like her. A lot. Stop worrying about it.”
“I know, son,” Nate said tiredly. “I’ll let you go. I’ll see you Friday night.”
Cole said his goodbyes and flipped the phone shut, holding it in his fist. He sat back and wondered briefly what his dad wanted to talk to him about. He remembered the last time Nate said he wanted to talk to him.
“Cole,” Nate said, sitting down on Cole’s bed.
Cole looked up from his desk, surprised to see his dad at his house during the week. He didn’t usually get to see his dad until the weekends unless some special occasion dictated that Cole was able to see his dad on a weekday.
“Hey, Dad,” Cole grinned, setting his pencil down next to his math book. “What’s up?”
“I…um…just needed to talk to you,” Nate said, studying the hands he’d clasped between his knees.
“What’s the matter,” Cole asked nervously. His legs started to tremble and he struggled to keep the fear off his face. “Dad?”
Nate ran his hands through his hair and attempted a weak smile. “Your mom was in a car accident today,” he said. “She’s fine,” he added quickly when Cole jumped up from his seat. “But, she was… not herself… when she was driving.”
Cole narrowed his eyes. “You mean she was drunk, right?”
Nate nodded. “The police arrested her, son. She’s in jail right now.”
Cole plopped down in his chair, not sure what to feel. He was relieved that his mother wasn’t hurt – that she was safe, but he was worried about her being in jail. He’d watched plenty of cop shows on television and jail seemed like a really scary place. “What’s going to happen to her?”
“I’m not sure,” Nate said, reaching out to squeeze his son’s shoulder. “I went to see her and she’s agreed to get help. That’s good, Cole.”
“Will it work?” he asked quietly, catching his dad’s eyes.
“I hope so.”
Cole dropped his gaze to the math problems he’d been working on, angry at the tears filling his eyes. “What’s going to happen now? Where am I supposed to go?”
Nate lifted Cole’s chin and wiped the tears from his son’s eyes. “Your mother has agreed that you should come live with me -for good. Unless, after she gets clean, you decide you want to live with her again.”
Cole knew he shouldn’t be happy his mother was in an accident and that she was currently in jail, but he couldn’t help but be e
xcited that he was finally going to get what he had always wanted; to live with his dad. “I want to live with you, Dad. You know that. But who will take care of her when she finally gets to come home?”
“Cole,” Nate said firmly. “You’re only ten. You’re not supposed to be taking care of her. She’s supposed to be taking care of you.” Cole bit his lip as Nate continued. “Listen, when she gets out she’ll go stay with her mom for awhile. She’ll be okay. You, on the other hand, will come live with me and be a kid for once.”
Cole jumped up and dug the bag he always packed when he went to his dad’s out of his closet. He looked up at Nate who was smiling.
“Just take what you want. If you need anything, we’ll go get it.”
Cole nodded and grabbed a few things that he knew he couldn’t leave behind. He glanced at the table by his bed and grabbed the picture of him and his dad at a Cubs game. He put his hand on the picture of him and his mother and looked up at Nate again.
“Son,” Nate said, kneeling beside him. “Just because you’re living with me doesn’t mean I want you to pretend you don’t have a mother anymore. You can have her picture and you can talk to her whenever you want. When she gets better, I’ll take you to see her whenever you want, also.”
Cole smiled, thinking about that picture. The only person who knew he still had it besides his father was Ally. More evidence that she was his best friend so therefore, he had to stop these feelings and prevent her from being hurt.
***
“Ally, damn,” Alec cursed, looking at her overstuffed bag. “We’re only going home for the weekend and you still have a ton of clothes in your closet there!”
“Watch your mouth, little brother,” she said with a smile, slipping her sunglasses off her head and over her eyes. They stood in the parking lot by RJ’s and Jamie’s cars and waited for everyone else to arrive.
Cole and RJ appeared, walking side by side, each with a bag slung over their shoulders. Cole gave her a cool glance and popped his trunk. “You two are riding with me,” he informed them in a clipped tone. “My dad’s going to be at your house.”