The children shook their heads, listening intently now. Slowly, they began to eat their ice cream as Gabe joined them, two more bowls in hand. He handed one to Susannah and kept the other for himself.
Susannah sat opposite Gabe at the table. Their knees touched briefly beneath. The feel of his skin was warm and solid and enticing. Just like him.
Trying not to think how much she would miss Gabe when he left, Susannah continued, “Because Gabe likes working in far-off places, where they don’t have doctors like they do here.” She told the children proudly, “So if he didn’t go to some of those faraway places and take care of the folks who live there, they might not have the medical care they need to get all better. And we like living here in our house and going to preschool, which will be starting again pretty soon, don’t we?”
The quints nodded, enthused. “So this way, everybody gets to have what they want. So we’re going to be fine,” she emphasized firmly. Even if she would miss Gabe more than she had ever imagined possible.
Chapter Fifteen
“You look gorgeous,” Millie said.
Certainly, Susannah thought, taking in the long white satin gown with the full skirt, portrait neckline and cap sleeves, prettier and more princess-like than she ever thought she could be. “You don’t think it’s too much?” she protested, feeling a little ridiculous—and a little majestic—all at once.
Millie dabbed her eyes, still looking as if nothing existed but this moment in time. “I think Gabe is going to be over the moon when he sees you walking down the aisle on Mike’s arm.”
Susannah teared up, too. She gathered the older woman in a heartfelt hug. “You’ve got to stop doing this!” She waved the air in front of her face in an effort to keep the sentimental tears away. “Because every time I see you get all weepy, it makes me completely emotional, too.”
Millie gave her another hug, then stepped away. “You’re supposed to be emotional. You’re getting married.”
“I know.” Susannah released a dreamy sigh and turned back to the mirror. The whole process of planning their hasty wedding was so surreal. Magical, almost. Which made her not want to believe it could all be real. Or that it was actually going to happen.
“Now what’s wrong?” Millie asked gently.
Susannah turned so the other woman could help her with the zipper. “I was just thinking about everything we have to do to get the kids ready for the ceremony.” Which, thanks to the expedited schedule she and Gabe had readily agreed upon, was in a matter of days.
“Mike and Gabe are taking the boys to get fitted for their tuxes this afternoon, while we take the girls out to get their dresses,” Millie said.
And thanks to the sample gown being available for purchase, she had her dress, Susannah thought.
“And they all already have dress shoes, right?”
“Yes.” Susannah stepped out of her gown and handed it to the waiting clerk.
“So it will be fine,” Millie reassured her.
Susannah knew Millie believed that because she assumed she and Gabe were marrying because they were madly in love, not out of convenience, to protect the quintuplets. And to give them the official legal father that they needed. And deserved.
So, Susannah promised herself, she would put aside her starry-eyed notions of happily-ever-after and find a way to make this work. After all, she and Gabe were good friends and lovers, too, as well as adults who realized romantic love wasn’t always part of the equation. There were still other kinds of love that could be deeply satisfying, Susannah thought as she finished dressing, then checked the list on her phone.
Next item.
“We also have to order the flower wreaths for their hair.”
“And yours,” Millie added with a smile. “Don’t forget you’re wearing a crown of flowers instead of a tiara with your veil.”
Susannah linked arms with her. “Maybe you should wear one, too. The kids would love it, as would I.”
“You sure?” Millie hesitated. “Corsages are traditional for the mother of the bride.” Which was what Millie was stepping in to be.
“Nothing about this wedding is traditional,” Susannah murmured, stepping forward to pay for her dress.
A fact that was reiterated constantly over the next few days of preparation.
And never more so than at the rehearsal dinner the Lockharts insisted upon throwing for them at the ranch Friday evening.
The entire Lockhart family, including every one of Gabe’s siblings, Millie and Mike, and the kids were all there with her and Gabe. The minister couldn’t make it—he was officiating another ceremony that evening—but had prepared them for their traditional vows in a meeting at his study at the community church.
But outside, the wedding preparations for the next day were in full swing. An ornate dinner tent had been erected on the lawn, white chairs and a wedding arbor set up. A dance floor would also be put up when the reception DJ, and the flute and harp duo who had been hired to play for the ceremony, arrived the next day.
“Doing okay?” Gabe whispered in her ear.
He looked incredible in a yellow button-up that brought out the whiskey hue of his eyes, dark jeans and dress boots. He smelled good, too, like the brisk masculine cologne he favored.
Trying not to think how much she would secretly like to duck out of there and find somewhere to kiss and hold him until her prewedding jitters disappeared, Susannah nodded. “I can’t believe how much trouble your parents have gone to. We’re never going to be able to pay them back.”
His manner as composed as hers was uneasy, Gabe inclined his head. “Sure we will. All we have to do is be happy.”
Susannah checked on the quintuplets, who were playing lawn croquet with two of Gabe’s sisters. “I meant all the money they’re spending.” For something that wasn’t even real. Not the way they clearly assumed, anyway.
He tucked her in close to his side. “I don’t think they mind, but if it will make you feel better, we can pitch in with the expenses.”
Savoring his warmth and his strength, she rested her head on his shoulder. “It would.”
He lifted her hand to his lips, kissed the back of it. Their glances met and held for several long beats. “Is that the only thing bothering you?”
How could she tell him she was suddenly getting cold feet without coming off as the most ungrateful woman on earth?
* * *
Gabe could see Susannah was overwhelmed by how fast everything was moving. But he had a feeling it was the only way to get her down the aisle. If she had too much time to think about it and/or worry about the untraditional aspects of their relationship, he knew she might just change her mind.
And he did not want her to do that.
Did not want to face a life without her.
Not after everything they had shared and found with each other since he’d returned to Texas.
“It’s going to be okay,” he said, privately vowing to do whatever he needed to do to gain her trust and faith in him. “Like we told the kids,” he promised her softly, “we will work it all out.”
Uncertainty came and went in her pretty sea-blue eyes, then she swallowed and took a deep breath. “This is the right thing for them,” she said, all protective mom once again.
“And for us,” he reiterated.
And for a while, anyway, from Gabe’s perspective, it seemed to be that way as the meal progressed. It was only when the dinner wound down and the toasts began that things got awkward again.
Mike, representing the bride’s side of the family, picked up his glass and went first, his voice as fond as the look on his face. “Susannah and the quintuplets came into our lives as the greatest blessing we had ever received. And though it wasn’t a formal arrangement until recently, when she asked us to be official grandparents to the quintuplets, a mom and dad to her, we have held them that w
ay in our hearts for years now. So—” he cleared his throat, beginning to get a little misty “—to see her so happy and content spending time with Gabe has been yet another godsend.”
Mike turned to Millie, who nodded encouragingly, then back to the assembled family.
“And though it’s all happened really quickly, we have seen them together enough to know they have the determination to make their family work on every level. So, let’s all raise a glass to them and wish them our very best.”
The crowd obliged. “Hear, hear,” everyone said in unison.
Mike’s words were sincere. But it still felt as if something was missing, and Susannah seemed to feel it, too, Gabe realized. Where, he wondered, were the mentions of love and destiny and happily-ever-after in the toast? Not that he and Susannah had ever dared talk that way to each other, for fear of upsetting their blossoming relationship. But it was certainly implied in their decision to marry, and it would have been nice on the eve of their wedding to hear someone else say something along those lines. He knew it would have reassured Susannah—who, beneath the polite smile, was becoming more and more tense.
Robert Lockhart went next, with his usual wry affability. “Everyone here knows how long Carol and I have waited for Gabe to decide to take the leap of faith required to commit to spending your life with someone else. Although we worried it might never happen with our oldest son,” Robert admitted, as the group chuckled in acknowledgment of Gabe’s wanderlust, “because he has never been one to let any grass grow under his feet.” He winked. “But maybe we should have known, because of his life of service to others, that he would eventually take up the mantle of responsibility and commitment required for marriage. And bring us grandchildren by way of the quintuplets. Who, by the way, Carol and I find completely delightful.”
The quintuplets, knowing they were being talked about, grinned happily.
“So,” Robert continued expansively, “we offer our heartiest congratulations and best wishes for this wonderful couple and their amazing new family.”
“Hear, hear!” everyone said.
Smiling, Gabe and Susannah clinked their glasses along with everyone else. However, as he watched his bride-to-be nervously sip her champagne, he couldn’t help wondering once again if she was having second thoughts about their impending union.
* * *
“You’re awfully quiet tonight,” Gabe said as he drove them back to town shortly after nine o’clock. He spoke in a low, hushed tone, mindful of the fact that the quints, tuckered out from the day’s events, were snoozing in the rear seats.
Susannah knew she was in a mood. Guilt mixed with embarrassment. “Sorry. I’ve got a lot on my mind.”
He frowned in obvious consternation. “The toasts bothered you.”
Susannah drew in a jerky breath, wishing she knew how to quell the intractable emotion welling up inside her. “They seemed awkward,” she admitted with no small trace of regret.
Apparently a lot more accepting of the pragmatic union they were about to enter into, he shrugged and said, “Probably because we sprang this on everyone pretty quickly, and they weren’t sure what to say.” He gave her a reassuring look as they waited at a stop sign at the edge of town. “But the well-wishes were there.” Looking her in the eye with gentle persuasion, he reached over and squeezed her hand. “Everyone wants our relationship to work over the long haul.”
His words were meant to be as comforting as his touch, but they fell short. “I know.”
“But...” He frowned, upset by her wariness.
Susannah searched for a reason behind her melancholia. “I guess I’m missing Brett and Belinda,” she admitted quietly, thinking how much family Gabe had at the party, compared to her much smaller group. She swallowed. “I always dreamed she would be my matron of honor.”
Understanding, Gabe continued, “And instead our two witnesses are going to be Mike and my dad.”
Susannah looked down at her hands, thinking, deliberating. The sentimentality edged back into her low tone. “I would really like to have Brett and Belinda be present in some way tomorrow for the ceremony.”
“Do you want to carry a picture of them, or have one displayed there at the ceremony?”
Susannah shared the plans she’d made thus far. “Well, now that you bring it up...I’ve got a sapphire necklace of Belinda’s that she wore on her wedding day, as something old. The flower garter she wore as something borrowed, and my own sapphire earrings as something blue. And, of course, my wedding dress as something new. But if we could have something of Brett’s there representing him...”
Gabe grinned as the evening took on a more positive tone. “Obviously you’ve got something in mind?”
“I know he left you his collection of vinyl LPs from your college days. Some of the songs were played at their own wedding reception. So—” Susannah’s mood lifted joyously “—if we could have the DJ spin a few of your and his old favorites?”
“It’s a great idea,” Gabe enthused. “They’re in my storage locker. I’ll go over there tonight.”
“And I’ll go with you, providing I can get someone to watch the kids.”
* * *
Mike and Millie were instantly amenable when they found out what the mission was. So Susannah and Gabe left the older couple on the sofa, watching TV and relaxing, while the quints slept upstairs in their beds, and they headed off to the storage locker.
Gabe drove up to the entrance and punched in the security code. The gates opened, and he drove on around to the fourth building. He parked and used his electronic key fob to get into the building, and then another to open up the garage-style door that fronted the well-lit cement aisle.
The facility was deserted that late on a Friday night, and so it was quiet as he led the way into his fifteen-by-twenty-foot space. There in the center was the futon he and Brett’d had in their apartment in medical school. Towers of boxes, his bike and random athletic gear surrounded the only place to sit down.
“The vinyls are back here, I think, out of the way,” Gabe said, already threading his way back there. “But feel free to look around to see if there is anything else belonging to Brett that would comfort you tomorrow. Maybe some wineglasses. Or...I don’t know...”
“Thanks,” Susannah said, spying a box with what appeared to be their med school yearbook on top.
Curious, and needing something concrete to remember her late brother-in-law by, she grabbed it and sat on the sofa. As she started to open it, a postcard fell out.
She didn’t mean to pry. Honestly, she didn’t, but when she saw the photo of the Hawaiian sunrise on it, coupled with the postmark from six years ago...she couldn’t help but glance down at the writing. See the message there. And what she read chilled her to her very soul.
* * *
Gabe was moving around the stacks of boxes when he saw Susannah standing there, postcard in hand, her face a blotchy white and pink. He swore inwardly. Realizing too late he should have remembered that was here. And either hidden it or found out a way to tell her that would’ve softened the blow. Panic tightened his gut. “I can explain.”
She looked as numb as he felt. “That you promised to look after me before they left on their trip to Hawaii?”
All along, Gabe had been telling himself it wasn’t love he wanted from Susannah, love he couldn’t give her in return. Seeing how dejected and disillusioned she was, he realized how wrong that was. Because if they’d already said they loved each other, or were at the very least committed to each other in the usual way of engaged couples, this wouldn’t have been such an issue. He edged closer, moving near enough to inhale the lingering scent of her wildflower perfume. Taking her by the hand, he led her over to the futon and sat down next to her. “They’d been worried about you for a while.”
She turned toward him, her knee accidentally nudging his thigh.
She pulled ba
ck so their legs were no longer touching. “Why?”
Taking the hint, he let go of her hand, too. Shrugged. “You’d been wanting your own husband and family for as long as Belinda had and weren’t any closer to achieving it.”
Shock and hurt flared. “They thought I was jealous of them?”
“Depressed,” he corrected, forcing himself to be completely honest, even as he tracked the moisture glimmering in her eyes. “Dejected about your own prospects.”
Silence fell. He expected her to burst into tears and let loose the flood of emotion that had to be building up inside her. Instead, she regained her composure, her demeanor more distant than he had ever seen it. “And so you were to, what, exactly?” she asked.
“Find an excuse to see you while they were gone. Make sure you were okay. Let them know if you weren’t so they could cut their second honeymoon short.”
Her sadness and disillusionment palpable, she continued staring at him like he was a stranger. “Only they never made it that far.”
“No.” He made no effort to hide his grief. “Before I could get to Houston to drop in on you, the helicopter crash happened.”
She dropped her head in her hands, sat there in silence for a few moments, then looked up again, eyes swimming. “So that’s why you kept calling and texting and emailing me after they died, just checking in.” Bitterness edged her tone.
What did she want from him? Gabe wondered grimly. An apology for doing what the situation required? What any good person would do? He watched her get up from the futon and walk away. “I wanted to make sure you were okay.”
Hands fisted at her sides, she swung back to face him. “For them.”
The accusation in her eyes stung. “For me.”
She smirked, a mixture of anger and disbelief in her expression. “So you wouldn’t feel guilty,” she guessed contemptuously.
His Plan for the Quintuplets Page 19