by Marie Etzler
When Jimmy saw Double A go outside to collect shopping carts, he followed him into the parking lot.
“Hey,” Jimmy said.
Double A ignored him and slammed together some carts.
“All right,” Jimmy said. “You may not want to talk to me, but I’m going to talk to you. I’m sorry about the jewelry store. It was stupid to do. I know it. I’m sorry you got in trouble too. Did you get grounded?”
“Yeah,” Double A said. “I finally meet a girl who actually likes me, and then I get grounded and I can’t go out with her. Thanks a lot.”
“I’m sorry,” Jimmy said.
Double A shoved a few more shopping carts together, forming a long line of them. “Just think next time, okay?”
“Okay.” Jimmy helped him with the carts and the two of them rode their group of carts back to the store entrance. “So things are going good?” Jimmy asked. “With Anna? I’m happy for you. You deserve it.”
“I’m going to see her after work. Last night was the last of being grounded, thank God. I’m gonna’ show her my car. It got it painted,” Double A said and pointed out to the end of the parking lot. “Red.”
Jimmy saw a bright red car sitting out by itself, Double A’s Cutlass 442 renewed. “Whoa.” He peeked into the store to see if their manager, Brenda, was around and waved Double A back out to the parking lot.
“This is awesome,” Jimmy said. He walked around the Cutlass, admiring it.
“It cost me enough, it better be awesome,” Double A said. “But I’m really happy with it,”
“Some things can be made like new,” Jimmy said.
“How’s Allison?” Double A asked.
“She’s mad at me,” Jimmy said. “I acted like a jerk to her too.”
“Sounds like a disease you got.”
“I think I’m cured now,” Jimmy said. He told him about his father, the story about his mother, and showed him the new stop watch.
“I think your dad is right,” Double A said as he admired the watch. “There’s no place without problems. No magic wand to wave and Bing! Everything’s okay.”
“That’s true,” Jimmy said. “Do I look like my dad?”
“There’s definitely a resemblance,” Double A said. “And your mom. Why?”
“Nothing,” Jimmy said. “I better go over Allison’s and apologize. See if she still wants to go to the concert. What am I going to say to her?”
“Tell her the truth,” Double A said.
Jimmy started to unbutton his work shirt. “Life is coming back into focus. Tell Brenda I had to leave, will you? I might be back. If not, I’ll work overtime tomorrow.”
“Hey!” Double A said. “Are we on for the concert tonight?”
“Absolutely!” Jimmy called back to him. I gotta’ get Allison to go, he said to himself. She’ll love it, and maybe me.
Jimmy jogged off faster than normal. He was so focused on getting to Allison’s house, he didn’t see a Cadillac pull out of the parking lot. The driver laid on the horn so long, it sounded like a cargo ship coming into the bay or a train approaching a station.
The horn cleared his mind. Suddenly Jimmy knew what he was going to say to Allison. He was going to tell her that he loved her.
He ran faster.
Allison was slouched on her living room couch, looking as if someone had thrown her there.
Her mother stopped in her tracks right in front of the TV on her way through the room and looked at her daughter.
“I can’t see the television,” Allison said.
“Don’t you have anything else to do but watch TV all day?”
“No,” she said.
A knock at the door made them both stop arguing.
“Well, go answer it,” her mother said.
Allison sighed with exaggeration to show her aggravation, but she got up.
When Allison opened the door and saw who it was, she folded her arms across her chest and said, “What do you want?” She looked down at Jimmy from the top step.
“I’m here to apologize,” he said.
“Go ahead,” she said, acting bored.
“Um,” he said, stalling. He thought he just did apologize, but apparently not. “I acted like a jerk. I was mad at my dad and everyone but you.”
She cut him off. “So naturally you took it out on me? Listen. I don’t go for that ‘you only hurt the ones you love’ crap. You either treat me right, or you take a hike. It’s not like I’m sitting around all day doing nothing, waiting for you.”
“I know. I understand,” Jimmy said, feeling like a witness at a murder trial that no one believed saw a thing. “I’ll be out of here anytime you want me to, but just let me explain.”
She rolled her eyes and waved her hands as if to say, Go ahead.
“I’m sorry about what I said about you not running,” he said. “I just don’t understand. If you were good enough to win –”
She cut him off. “I used to run with my sister, Michelle. She had Down’s Syndrome. She would ride her bike alongside me. I was in track, so she wanted to be. I used to practice with her. She was really good, actually. She motivated me, but then she died.”
“God, I’m sorry,” Jimmy said.
“You didn’t know,” she said. “Because I didn’t tell you. It happened last year, and it’s still hard. I guess I’ve been depressed. My mother says I’m acting out, driving too fast, getting in trouble back in Oregon.”
“What did you do?”
“Nothing much,” Allison said. “Well, a little bit of drugs, but that only gave me new problems. So my parents decided we all needed a change of scenery. Here we are. It just doesn’t change on the inside that quickly. That’s a lot to dump on you. You sure you still want to be here?”
“Yes,” Jimmy said. “I’m not running away. I’ve gotten in trouble, too. Listen. About your sister, I don’t know what that must feel like, but I know how I felt when my mom was sick. I didn’t really understand it back then, but I know what it feels like when someone you love is just gone. But now I have a chance to start over. If you want, we can start training again, when you’re ready. Running works for me. Actually, it’s all I got.”
“You’ve got a lot more than that,” Allison said.
“Listen, next week I’m going to Clemson,” he said. “My dad is letting me go, finally. Anyway, there’s a big competition at the end, and I really want you to be there. My dad made arrangements, so you could ride up with him and Rich.”
“I don’t know them,” she said. “What will we talk about in the car all the way there?”
“They’ll tell you every embarrassing story about me you want to hear.”
“You’d let them do that to you? For me?” she said, looking him up and down.
“I always felt like there was something missing in my life,” he said. “It was you.”
He dug in his pocket and pulled out a necklace he bought. “I got you this.”
Allison came down the steps to look.
When she got close, Jimmy could smell her shampoo or maybe it was lotion. Whatever it was, it was great.
“There’s the smile I love,” he said to her as she admired the necklace.
“Really?” She said. “Tell me how much you love it.”
“I love you. I’d do anything for you. I’d run from here to Oregon and back. Even if you went to Africa, I’d still get there. Even if your dad doesn’t like me.”
“He’ll love you once he gets to know you,” she said. “Just as much as me.”
“How much is that?” He smiled and pulled her close to him. Pressing her body against his made his mind feel hazy but the rest of him wide awake.
“This much,” she said and kissed him.
“There’s one more thing I want,” he said.
“You think you can push –” she started to say but he cut her off.
“Go to the concert with me tonight. I got the tickets.”
“Oh,” she said. “Well, since you already got th
e tickets and all.”
“Come on!”
“I’m just kidding,” she said. “Of course I want to go! Everything’s going to be great now.”
At that moment, Jimmy believed it.
Just then a soccer ball hit Jimmy in the back of the legs.
“What the –” he said and turned around.
“Sorry,” Lindsay from next door said as she ran up out of breath. “I’m so tired that I lost the ball.”
“Sounds like you need to work on endurance,” Allison said. “My sister used to help me with my workouts. Want me to help you?”
“Yeah!” Lindsay said.
“Come on, Jimmy,” Allison said to him. “You can show us how fast you are.”
“Oh, yeah? The two of you against me,” he said to Allison and Lindsay.
“You’re on,” Lindsay said and laughed.
They joined Lindsay in her yard and let her boss them around to create a race course. Jimmy couldn’t have been happier.
CHAPTER 21
When Jimmy got home to change clothes, he found Linda sitting in the darkened living room, curtains drawn, and television low. A cigarette dangled from the fingers of one hand and she held a glass of whiskey in the other. She wore a big t-shirt and jeans but no shoes.
“Hi, Jimmy,” she said, sounding a little drunk. “Have a drink.” She raised her glass.
He turned it down with a hand motion, hoping he could just get through the living room to his bedroom without incident. He felt the tension start in the pit of his stomach again, but he knocked it out of him, envisioning it as a baseball he hit out of the park.
“Oh, I forgot,” she said, slurring her words. “You’re going to be Mr. Big Track Star at Clemson now that you and your Daddy are buddies again.”
“Is he here?”
“No, just us,” she said. “Alone as usual. And it will probably get worse, after what you said to him.”
“It’s not my fault you’re —,” he paused. He was going to say she was cheating on him, but he remembered what his father had said, that it wasn’t his business. Jimmy turned to go.
“Wait, Jimmy,” she said. “You’re the only one I can talk to. I’m not really mad at you.”
She lurched up out of the armchair and cornered him. She stood so close to him, he could smell the liquor and cigarette smoke on her breath. The smell was sour, not like she’d just taken a sip but the smell was old, a rotten smell. His stomach turned from the stench.
He saw for the first time that she wasn’t trying to get his attention with her tight clothes but that she was actually sad and lonely. He’d never thought of her as a real person before, only as a manipulative stepmother, who was always trying to ruin his life.
“We were always such special friends,” she said. “You let me rub your legs that year you grew four inches in one summer, remember?”
His head began to ache from the cigarette smoke that filled the room and the tension creeping up his shoulders.
“I’d come in and smooth your hair while you were sleeping and your father was away,” she continued. “You were lonely for your mother after she left. I get lonely too. Sometimes people make bad decisions when they’re lonely. I never meant to hurt you. You know, about your father’s baseball.”
She tried to reach for his hair. He grabbed her arm and jerked it back.
“I knew it,” he said. “I can’t believe you did that. You almost ruined my life. What’s wrong with you? I’m not some kid you can wrap round your finger anymore.”
“What’s different now? Look around.” She waved her hands drunkenly. “There’s nobody here! What do you care? You’ve got your little girlfriend now.”
“Don’t talk about her,” Jimmy said.
“I’ll do whatever I want,” she said. “I’m not the one with steroids in my system.”
“What?”
“That’s right,” she said. “I had some from work and a few tablets may have gotten crushed up and put in your food and Gatorade. I think I’ll call the coach to ask him about drug testing.”
She stumbled toward the phone, but Jimmy blocked her.
“You’re lying,” he said. “You must be crazy.”
“Not like your mother,” she said and laughed.
“Shut up!” Jimmy yelled.
“You tell your father you lied, or I’ll say Rich gave you the steroids. Then you’ll both go to jail.”
“You can’t do that!”
“I can and I will,” she said. “And the police will believe me. You know about Ritchie’s past, right?”
Jimmy was breathing hard. He tried to get a grip on himself to think what to do.
“I’ll tell Rich!” he said. “And my dad. They’ll stop you.”
“Tell your father you lied about me,” she said, angry.
“No,” Jimmy said. “I won’t lie. I’m not like you.”
“Ha. That’s it then,” she said. She looked at her watch. “Aren’t you late for a concert or something? Have fun! Oh, and don’t worry, I haven’t told your father you stole a necklace for your little whore, not yet anyway.”
Jimmy was seething with rage that flashed through he veins so fast it actually hurt.
She stumbled to her purse and jingled her car keys at him.
“Gotta’ go to work,” she said. “Better got some coffee on the way. I have to help in ER tonight. Gotta’ be on my toes!” She looked down at her feet. “Oops! Need shoes. And a uniform. Ha, ha!” She shook a pack of breath mints from her purse. “Oh, I better have a few of these too!” She popped some mints in her mouth and went into her room, fumbling to pull her t-shirt over her head as she shut the door. “Bye bye!”
Jimmy watched her disappear behind the door as if he were seeing a circus show, some bizarre surreal act he could not comprehend. The slam of the door brought him to his senses. He ran to change into jeans and bolted out the door to Double A’s house. He had to find Rich.
CHAPTER 22
That night, driving to the concert, Jimmy, Allison, and Double A sat in the front seat of Double A’s Cutlass 442. The red paint gleamed in the street lights like the car was fresh off a showroom floor.
“I have to find Rich,” Jimmy said. “I hope he’s at the concert. He said he was going. I can’t believe she would do that. Just when I was starting to feel sorry for her. Do you think she did that? I mean put steroids in my food?”
“I don’t know,” Double A said. “Does it work that way?”
“Yeah. If she did, it will be out of your system faster if you drink a lot of water,” Allison said. “I heard that back in school from a guy on the football team.”
Jimmy looked at her.
“Did you ever take anything?”
“And grow a beard?” she said. “No way.”
“I’m sorry,” Jimmy said. “I’m really freaked out right now. Can we stop at a convenience store and get some water?”
“Yeah,” Double A said.
They went into a store and Jimmy guzzled from a liter bottle.
“Slow down,” Allison said. “Not that much. You’ll flush the minerals out too.”
“I’ll do what I have to do to make sure,” he said.
“No one is going to test you tonight,” she said. “We’ll get this figured out, okay? We’ll find your brother, and maybe your dad can help.”
“I’m not sure what I’d tell my father now,” Jimmy said. “Let’s go to the Sportatorium and look for Rich.”
They rode out of their neighborhood and were soon inching along in traffic.
“Why did you take Sheridan Street?” Jimmy said. “Sterling is faster.”
“No way,” Double A said. “It doesn’t even go all the way through. We’d have to get back on Sheridan anyway. I know how to get there.”
“Drive faster,” Jimmy said.
“We’ll get there faster if we don’t have to stop and wait for the police to write me a speeding ticket and then for the ambulance to pick you up after I beat the crap out of
you.”
“Very funny,” Jimmy said.
“Just trying to lighten the mood for a minute,” Double A said. “We’ll get there. I’m driving as fast as I can.”
“You’re driving me over edge!” Jimmy said. He laughed.
“What’s so funny?” Allison said.
“His father used to say that all the time,” Jimmy said. “When we were kids, tearing up his vegetable garden in the backyard when we played soccer, that’s what he always said to us.”
“My dad says, ‘This doesn’t add up.’ ” Allison said. “He must have been born a banker.”
“Like my father,” Jimmy said. “Born a pilot. I remember my dad saying to me and Rich, ‘This ain’t gonna’ fly’ whenever we did something and got caught.”
“And you always got caught,” Double A razzed Jimmy.
“You weren’t no angel,” Jimmy said. “Don’t let him fool you.”
“None of us are angels,” Allison said.
“That’s the truth,” Jimmy said. Jimmy remembered that he had not told Allison about him getting arrested. He didn’t want to say it now and maybe ruin everything. He decided he’d tell her later, when he thought of exactly how he’d tell her.
When they reached the intersection of County Line Road and Sheridan Street, Double A waited for a break in the traffic and made a right turn onto County Line Road to join the stream of cars heading in the same direction as if on a pilgrimage.
“Finally, County Line Road,” he said. “It’s not that far. It usually doesn’t take this long to get here, but this traffic sucks. The Sportatorium is right down there.” He pointed for Allison.
“Remember when we tried to ride our bikes all the way down to County Line Road to fish in that lake by the Turnpike at night?” Jimmy said.
“Don’t tell that story,” Double A said.
“You rode your bikes all the way down here?” Allison asked.
“This was a two-lane road then, no houses, nothing,” Double A said.
“And it was dark. We were in the seventh grade. We get down there and he’s scared the whole time saying we should go back,” Jimmy said.
“And you got us in trouble by riding your bike on the exit ramp,” Double A said. “The toll plaza lady called the police. My mom never let me sleep over Jimmy’s house again.”