by Nana Prah
“Workaholic?”
She reached out to smooth his raised eyebrow, thought better of it and placed her hand on the table. Why was it so difficult to keep her body parts to herself while around him? “I told you about my full-time computer-programming job and working in the restaurant. I made loads of money, but never had time to date. Or maybe it was the lack of men wanting to date me. Either way, when Broderick asked, I said yes.”
He didn’t meet her gaze when he asked, “Did you love him?”
How much should she share? “I did. Very much.”
His Adam’s apple bobbed before he said, “Oh.” Was he upset or surprised that she could fall in love with someone else?
“We were great friends. Got along well and agreed about almost everything.” Passion had never been in the cards for them. At first, she’d thought it was because she’d been overweight, but when she’d slimmed down, the sex still seemed perfunctory. She’d presumed she just wasn’t made to have good sex. If she’d known Broderick was in the closet, she wouldn’t have taken all the blame.
She placed her arms across her chest as the memories tumbled over each other. “He was an ideal husband. I’m talking flowers and gifts when I least expected them, and he took care of me as if I were the most precious thing in the world to him. It was like he was always coming up with ways to make sure I knew he appreciated me and enjoyed being married to me.” She shook her head at the regret of being spoiled so lavishly and then losing it even though they’d both known something was missing in their on-paper perfect marriage. “Unfortunately, I never fell in love with him.” My heart always belonged to you and never let me forget it.
His shoulders relaxed and his eyes twinkled with a repressed grin. “So your heart wasn’t breaking a few minutes ago when you looked as if someone had stolen your favorite Ohio State sweatshirt.”
She smiled at the shared memory. “I never forgave you for scaring me half to death. I loved that top.”
He chuckled, and the misery that had filled her a moment ago dissipated. “You wore it all the time. You needed an intervention.”
“Not even Josh was so mean as to sneak into my room and take it.”
“Maybe he didn’t care enough.”
When had the club turned into a sauna? Water would be perfect to quench her suddenly dry mouth. Had he really cared about her back then? Everything in her bones had told her he had, but it had all gone downhill after she’d made the mistake of initiating that fateful, magnificent kiss. She’d loved him so much, and holding back for a moment longer may have broken her heart even more than expressing it had.
“If you aren’t heartbroken over Broderick—” there was that little snarl again “—then what’s wrong?”
Tapping her fingers in a tuneless beat on the surface of the table she tried to articulate the issue. She’d been antsy and indecisive all week, not just with Miguel when they’d met twice to discuss the club. “It’s... I don’t know.”
Miguel reached out and covered her hyperactive hands. His comforting warmth seeped into her and she struggled to keep from turning her hands over so they could be palm to palm.
“I know you might end up beating me senseless for saying this, but take it easy.”
“I’ve made some really bad mistakes.” Her gaze gravitated to his protective hand over hers and she realized it wouldn’t last so there was no need to even have it now. She slid her hand from beneath his and hugged herself. Grabbing her sides at his look of disappointment kept her from placing her fingers back into his strong comforting grasp.
“We all have,” he said. “It’s part of life’s learning process.”
“I’m having difficulty trusting that I’ll make the right decisions, so I must’ve subconsciously decided to make none.” She opened her arms out wide. “This is a lot of responsibility. What if I fail like Broderick said I would?”
He clenched his hand into a fist. “We weren’t tight in college, but the more I hear about him, the more I want to crush him.”
How did one respond to such vehemence? Not by smiling, that’s for sure. Chastising him would be appropriate, but the happiness won out and she covered her mouth to hide it. “He wasn’t a bad guy, just pissed that he had to give up his precious club by a court order once he’d decided to follow his bliss. He treated me really well while we were married. One time—”
He stood with enough force to rock the chair. “I don’t need to hear your feel-good stories about him.” He took a few steps toward the bar before returning to his seat. “How can I help you boost your confidence? Since it’s my fault you ended up in this situation in the first place, I’d like to make things right.”
Had he really just said that? “You’re not responsible for my bad decisions. Yes, what happened between us influenced my life, but I had a choice. Always. So please don’t feel guilty about my current state of instability. It’s all on me.”
She wiggled in her seat when all he did was stare at her. “What?”
“You’re an amazing woman.”
Touched, she whispered, “Thank you.”
The intimate moment was broken when he clapped his hands once. “I have an idea.”
His enthusiasm startled her. “Shoot, Mr. Astacio. The floor is yours.” She swung her arm in a wide arc. “Literally.”
“Ha-ha. I have a feeling you never really did the club scene.”
“Don’t start. Who had to maintain her 3.7 GPA even though you tried to destroy it by always ragging on me about studying too much?”
“And who—” he pointed finger guns in her direction “—ended up tossing away her degree to run a nightclub? That’s ironic.”
“Don’t ya think?” They said it at the same time and laughed. They used to have so much fun making up lyrics to the old Alanis Morissette song. It turned out that irony was more difficult to sing about than they’d initially thought.
Why couldn’t the whole day go on like this? She’d missed how things used to be with them. Light and easy. Now she had it back. For how long? It didn’t matter. Friendship had no expiration date. But a niggling fear settled behind her breastbone. What if she fell in love with him again? The way things were going, she’d fail a polygraph no matter what answer she gave, because she’d never stopped.
Tanya waited for the dread to settle in. Nothing came. As much as she should run away as if her addiction to carbs had returned, she knew this time nothing would develop from her feelings. He’d be her friend, and that was all. It would hurt to see him date other women. Even the thought brought a haze of green to her vision. She’d always hated how jealous she’d gotten when he hung out with the beautiful women who chased him on campus. She never impugned them, though. If she had looked like she did today, she’d have done the same as them.
Liar. She’d wanted more. A commitment. His whole heart focused on her. She doubted he could ever provide it to her. Or any woman. His free-spirited, fun-loving, passion-seeking personality wouldn’t allow it, so she shouldn’t expect it of him. She’d never get it.
Fully sober, she asked, “What’s your point?”
“Gurl...” The word went on forever before his head started moving side to side with a finger waggle and he added a higher pitch to his voice. “You need to dip your toes into some red nail polish. Tease yo’ hair, add a lot more makeup to your already stunning face and go club hopping to see what’s out there.” She would’ve been able to keep in her laughter at his overly effeminate gestures and speech, but the head toss and hair pat was too much to keep her straight-faced.
“I’m sure you remember that my husband left me for another man, yet you decide to play it gay?”
“Anything to make you laugh.”
What was she going to do with him? “Thanks. So you want to go clubbing?”
“You need the exposure so you can experience my vision. By the time we finish our two-nigh
t tour, you’ll be ready to tell me what this place needs.”
She shook her head. “No way. Tanya needs her sleep. I’ll do one night with you.”
The gleam in those hazel eyes didn’t bode well for her negotiation tactic. “That’s what the days are for. You won’t regret it. Two nights of partying will add more spice to your life. Pep to your step and groove to your move.” He did the last with a full body roll. “Guaranteed.”
“Nice commercial.” What would it be like to go out and just have fun with him? Being together for two days straight appealed most. It didn’t matter what they were doing—his presence had both a calming and exciting effect on her that she couldn’t get enough of. “Fine. No need to get any more dramatic about it. I’ll go.” And risk losing even more of my heart to you.
Chapter 12
Tanya had a way of taking everything Miguel knew about himself and throwing it out the window, making him see the truth. Never had he been more real with someone than with her. That’s what she requested from him, so he readily gave it. She’d captured him just by allowing him to be himself.
His mother had often bragged that from the moment he’d been born, females had flocked around him. As he grew, he’d learned when to flash his smile in a way that had them fanning themselves and giggling. He knew the power of his hazel eyes, dimples and thick curly hair, and used them to his advantage.
Charm and good looks didn’t work with Tanya. Back in college, he hadn’t wanted it to. He’d desired her to like him for who she got to know. Preserving his friendship with Josh had been an even bigger necessity. Now, as a grown man who’d changed over the years, he knew what he wanted. Yes, Josh’s friendship still meant the world to him, but he needed Tanya in his life. She was what had been missing in all of those failed relationships, he just hadn’t realized it. Until now.
Maybe it was their history of being real with each other. Or the fact that he’d been attracted to her from the first moment they’d met. Or even that fate had thrown her into his path. He didn’t know the reason he loved her, only that he did.
“When you said we’d be going clubbing, I thought you meant in Cleveland.” Tanya ran her hand over the wood paneling of his family’s private jet. Now that they were airborne, the shock seemed to have worn off. “You sneaky man. That early dinner invitation was a good cover to get me here for the five o’clock takeoff.”
He laughed, recalling her open mouth when he’d had his driver drop them off at the airport. He loved surprising her. Back in school, she wouldn’t accept any of the expensive gifts he’d tried to give for her birthday or Christmas, but when he did something that pleased her, she accepted it. The difficult part had been figuring out what would make her happy. It took a lot of observation and listening on his part. Simple things like reminding her that her favorite show was on when she got lost in her studies would make her beam. Even though he’d hated the vampire-turned-good show with a white-hot passion, he’d sit and watch the whole thing with her just to be near her.
“You know I don’t do things small. You need to experience the hottest clubs so yours can be comparable.”
“Ever heard of the internet? Lots of pictures and even videos.” For a moment, a vise gripped his chest as her tone rose. Was she upset with him? And then she kicked her feet in the air and squealed. “I’m just playing. Now that my little lecture is over, thank you so much, Miguel. I can’t believe I’m actually on a private plane.” She sucked in her cheeks and posed. “I feel like a movie star. Now I can say I’ve jet-setted.”
The lit-up seat belt sign was the only thing stopping him from scooping her into his arms and squeezing her close. Her joy was his, and he loved the challenge of figuring out what made her happy. “That’s not a word.”
“Who cares? It’s what I am now.” Her glittery dark eyes gazed into his, and her smile did things to his body only she could relieve. “Now that you’ve kidnapped—”
“I did no such thing. You sprinted onto the plane, not caring if I was with you or not.”
Her giggle tickled him. “I love to travel.”
He remembered. It didn’t matter where, either. When he’d talked about all the places he’d been, she’d sighed in longing and told him about the family vacations they’d taken when she was younger. “Sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever have time to enjoy life like I did when I was a child,” she’d once said after telling him about one of her trips.
He had vowed that day to show her the world. And then he’d messed it all up and lost her. Now that he’d gotten a second chance, at least at her friendship, he’d make sure to fulfil his promise.
“Where are we going?”
“New York City.”
She clasped her hands under her chin. “Oh, my goodness. You are just too damn much.” And then she frowned. “I didn’t bring clothes for an overnight trip.”
He scanned her conservative black suit skirt with the sparkly blouse, which she’d topped off with a jacket. “You did understand when I told you we were going clubbing, right?”
She looked down at her clothes with her arms spread open. “I look fine.”
“Sure, if you’re going to work for an accounting firm. Before we hit the clubs, we’re going shopping. Don’t worry about the things you’ll need for overnight—it’s on me.”
“You will not buy me clothes, Astacio.” She squinted her eyes and raised her voice to a near roar. “Do you hear me?”
He pretended to clean out his ears. “I think the pilot heard you. Can you honestly tell me that you’re dressed to party in the most popular nightclubs in New York?”
The apparent war occurring in her analytical mind raged for a few seconds before she relented. “No. But if you’d told me where we were going, I could’ve prepared better.”
He snorted. “I doubt it. Every time I see you, you’re wearing something similar. Do you own clothes that show off your fabulous body? You worked hard for it—let the world see it.”
“I’m not dressing like a hoochie.”
He burst out laughing and couldn’t stop. His ribs hurt.
The pilot turned off the seat belt sign. She unclicked her belt and angled her body toward him. “I mean it. I’ll pay for my own clothes. I may not be in the same class as you, but I’m not poor.”
His lingering smile left. Where had that come from? Most women liked that he was willing to lavish gifts on them. Once again, Tanya proved to be the absolute opposite. “No one said you were. What was that crack about not being in my class?”
She turned to the window where they flew among the clouds. “Never mind.”
“That’s not the way we roll. Tell me what’s bothering you.”
“You’re rich.”
He waited for the problem. “And...”
“I’m not. The two can’t hang out together. Back in college, you lived in a dorm room, ate in the cafeteria and made friends with the locals.” She waved her arms around the cabin’s luxurious space. “This isn’t the guy I knew back then.”
“I hate to burst your bubble, but I’ve always been wealthy. Have you forgotten those rides I used to give you in my Aston Martin?” He tried really hard to figure out what was going on in her mind. “What’s this about?”
Her shoulders slumped with her heavy sigh. “Our friendship is unbalanced. There’s nothing I can offer you that you don’t have. Even now, you’re doing everything to help me get my club back on its feet and I can’t even pay you.”
Yet another novel position she’d put him in. “We may not be financially equal, but you’re greater than me in so many ways that I envy you. Just by being your amazing self, you make me feel special. You treat me like a person, not a money machine. That respect is what makes us equal.”
“Oh.”
“Is that all you have to say?”
She shrugged with an exaggerated “Meh.”
T
ears rolled down his eyes with the laughter she’d evoked. He would never get tired of being with her. If he had his way, he’d make sure she realized just how good they could be together. Not just good, but perfect.
Chapter 13
Tanya could get used to Miguel’s lifestyle. The room at the Worthington Hotel in Manhattan was by far the most lavish she’d ever been in. Carpet so thick she feared tripping, a four-poster bed she had to climb a step to get into and, if she could pretend to be pregnant with the thick duvet tucked under her clothes, she’d steal it. The gourmet dinner they’d eaten at the restaurant had been divine.
She’d be destitute if things didn’t improve with the club, but she’d ended up in one of the most luxurious hotels in New York, all because Miguel had apologized and she’d forgiven him for his past transgression. It hadn’t been difficult because she’d missed him so much over the years.
His speech about how much he respected her and considered her his equal had spread a lovely warmth through her whole body. She’d been ready to crawl into his lap, entrap his cheeks between her hands and meld their lips together until they were both groaning. She’d distracted herself from falling into the urge just in time. Making the same mistake twice in a lifetime would discredit her hard-earned wisdom.
Their lifestyles were mismatched, but at least he knew she wasn’t using him for his money. She’d rather go back to her heaviest weight without the deliciousness of the binge eating than for him to think it was a remote possibility.
After ten minutes of gazing out the window at the perfect nighttime skyline of the Big Apple, a knock sounded at the door. Tanya went to the intricately carved panel and looked through the peephole. A petite Asian woman about her age stood on the other side with a clothes rack. “Good evening, Ms. Carrington. My name is Mei Ito from Saks Fifth Avenue. Mr. Coleman arranged to have you try on some dresses for your outings tonight and tomorrow.”
Mr. Coleman? Her brain raced through the Rolodex of her mind to find anyone she knew by that name, and then it hit her. Miguel was playing secret agent again. So he wouldn’t even let her go out to shop, which meant she couldn’t purchase her own clothes. The crafty scoundrel.