by Nana Prah
“No. They dug into your, I mean our, past.”
Her eyes sprang open and hope flared. They hadn’t found anything newsworthy in the present. At least it wasn’t about him with another female. She thrust her shoulders back and pretended to have courage as she looked down at one of the papers.
A picture of her staring up into Mr. Coleman’s eyes seemed innocuous enough, until she saw the insert picture of them together back in college and then a solitary one of her when she was at her heaviest a year later. Her heart dropped to her toes as the heading hit her—“Miguel Astacio’s Charity Case.”
She flipped the pages until she got to the article. A wave of nausea hit her as she read. How could they be so cruel? The writer had picked her apart. From her weight to her struggling club, and even intimating that she’d turned her ex-husband onto men. The past she could deal with. She could even live with the lies.
The part where they mentioned Miguel being ashamed to be seen with her as himself made her dizzy with fear. They’d named his aliases and pictured her with them at the clubs. They seemed to gloat when they mentioned that only two months ago he’d been seen in Paris wearing his own face with Sashara Essien, an heiress to an oil empire in Nigeria. The picture showed off Sashara’s curvaceous yet thin body wearing a designer gown, looking as if she knew she belonged in it and with Miguel. They were smiling at each other, with Miguel’s dimples front and center.
The last part of the article discussed how long her and Miguel’s rags-to-riches romance would last. The author gave it a month because, after all, they did have history. Eventually, he’d find someone of his caliber.
The crushing in her chest prevented her from taking in deep breaths. She covered her mouth as bile rose up. Miguel stood and rushed her out of the living room and to a half bathroom down the hall. She slammed the door shut as she zoned in on the toilet.
Tears stung her eyes as she released the contents of her stomach. Her world was crumbling just like she knew it would. She had no right being with a man like Miguel. They were too different. She retched again, but nothing came out.
A light knock sounded on the door. “Sweetheart, are you okay? Can I come in?”
Horrified, she placed a hand on the door. “No... I just...need a moment.” Struggling to take in deep breaths, she waited before rinsing her mouth. Tears streamed down her face. No, she could never compete with Sashara or any of the other glamorous women he’d dated over the years. She was a simple, local girl. She didn’t know how to associate with the rich. She’d be a constant embarrassment to him. And herself.
Would the media ever get tired of making fun of the heavyset woman she used to be? Would they always see her as an uncouth, middle-class woman who was out for a hunk of the Astacio fortune?
He claimed to love her, but was he humiliated to be seen with her? Was that really why he had to be in disguise every time they were together?
Her pounding head couldn’t take anymore. She wanted to go home and hide. Forever. Why had she ever listened to her brother and gone to Miguel for help? Why had she let her pride allow Broderick to goad her into keeping the club instead of selling it and splitting the profits? Why had she fallen in love with Miguel? Again?
The last tore her up the worst. He’d been no good for her the first time. What had made her think anything had changed other than her losing weight and time passing?
She washed her face wishing she could scrub out everything else just as easily. Getting through this without any more pain and mortification was the main thing. No matter how much she’d hoped the fairy-tale dream would come true, Miguel wasn’t hers to keep.
Why did the truth have to hurt so damn badly?
She couldn’t stay in the bathroom forever. She had to face him, to tell him her final decision. No more making love until she felt as if she’d vanish once they separated. No more pretending to be in a relationship when there was no future for them.
She’d continue to accept the help he’d offered for her club, but she’d cut off anything personal. Just as it should’ve been in the beginning. Leaving the room to tell him was the hardest thing she’d ever had to do. Why couldn’t she have him? She deserved to be happy after all these years. Didn’t she?
Who was to say Miguel was her one? Who’s to say he isn’t? her heart whispered. She swallowed the lump in her throat. She could cry all day and night for the rest of her life once she got through this and went home.
After a deep inhale and release of a shaky breath, she opened the door. The sight of Miguel’s lips set in a deep frown of worry nearly melted her resolve. She breezed past him as if she were actually confident about her decision. “I’d like to go home now.”
He rushed to catch up with her and blocked her path. “Let’s talk about it.”
“What about?” Cocking her head, she gazed up into his extraordinary eyes. “The media hates me. They think I’m a gold-digging porker who is so far out of your league that they question how I’ve even managed to bamboozle you. Yet, they’re confident you’ll wake up and see me for who I really am.” She held up a hand to stop him from speaking. “To be honest, I had my doubts about us. We’re so different in class that sometimes it makes my heart ache. And there’s nothing I can do about it because I am who I am and you’re an heir of the great Astacio dynasty.” She waved between them. “We were crazy to think this could work.”
“Did you have doubts about us back in college?”
She scoffed. “I was young, naive and stupid. I’ve learned too much since then. Besides nothing came from whatever we shared in the past. You made sure of it.”
A twitch appeared in his jaw. “And I explained why. I couldn’t lose your brother’s friendship at the time, and I was an imbecile. Totally undeserving of you.”
She crossed her arms over her chest in an attempt to ward off any more of his tempting words. “And now?”
“I’m still undeserving.” He stared into her eyes for the longest time. “But now, I know I can be a good man to you. To treat you like the queen you are.”
Dammit. How could he have found the perfect things to say so readily? And then she recalled his marketing guru status. He could get anyone to buy whatever he was selling. A shake of her head helped to clear it. No more falling into him. They had separate lives to lead.
Self-preservation was the key. “The words are nice,” she gritted out, “but they aren’t enough. You’ll get tired of me, just like you did every other woman you’ve ever been with.” She wasn’t delusional enough to think she was anything special.
His hands clenched and opened several times as he arched his neck to look up at the ceiling. When his eyes focused back on her, she had to hold her position rather than stumble away from his obvious anger. “You have got to be the most hardheaded woman I have ever met.” Rather than argue with her as expected, he swung around and stomped into the living room, leaving her too stunned to follow. When he returned he held her bag. He thrust it at her before heading toward the front door. “Are you coming?”
She blinked several times. Was he letting her go? Just like that? Didn’t he know the vultures were out to hound her for a statement? Didn’t he care? She no longer had to pretend to be angry because now the edges of her vision had blurred with it as she stomped over his expensive floors to catch up to him while he stood fuming at her with the door open. “What the hell is wrong with you?” she asked in a raised voice. “I’m the one they tore apart in front of the whole world. You came out looking like some kind of benevolent angel showing mercy to a homely, middle-class, stricken, formerly obese woman.”
“What pisses me off is that you can’t see how much it hurts me to see you in pain.” He’d raised his voice to match her volume as his nostrils flared like a bull ready to stomp on anything that got in the way. “You never intended to get involved. I get that. I was a jerk to you in the past. I apologized and I thought we’d gotte
n past it.”
She stood on her toes to get up into his face. His scent distracted her weak self for a moment. “I forgave you. We put it past us.”
“That’s garbage and you know it.” He glared down at her, his eyes dark. “The first chance you got to call off whatever we have going on between us and you’re ready to run. You don’t trust me as far as you can throw a five-hundred-pound anvil.”
That did it. The gloves were off, and they were going to do some MMA. Neither of them would leave this conversation unscathed. “You admitted to choosing my brother over me. How can I trust that if Josh told you today that you should leave me alone that you won’t? Or if things get to be too much with the press or your family that you won’t leave me? You created your own reputation, Astacio. It’s you who doesn’t have sticking power.”
Creases appeared in the corners of his eyes with his narrowed gaze. “I told you I’ve changed. You are the one I want to be with. No one else. There’s no way I will ever hurt you like that again.”
“And what are you going to have them tell the press about me?” She poked a finger into his chest and refrained from wincing at the pain she’d caused herself. “Nothing. It’s written all over your shocked face. You weren’t planning to tell them anything about me. I was a challenge to you, that’s why. You wanted to see if you could get me back after the damage you did. It just happened to make you look good in my brother’s eyes by helping his sister out.”
Raising his hands into the air, his fingers clenched into claws and he growled. “I can’t talk to you. Not while you’re like this.”
“What? Now that I’m being honest?”
“No. You’re letting fear rule you. Trying to destroy any chance we have of being together.”
His logic penetrated into her brain, but she batted it away. “No, Miguel. We never had a chance. We had an encounter. You knew all along it wasn’t long-term. You can’t handle it because I’m the one breaking it off this time.” She stormed out the door with her nose in the air. She’d walk home if she had to, but she wasn’t spending another moment with him in his extravagant house.
He followed her out, grabbed her arm and swung her around. “Where do you think you’re going?”
“Home.”
A bark of laughter came from his throat. “Are you seriously thinking of walking?”
“God gave me two good legs. If you won’t take me there, they will.”
The tense stare down ended with him relaxing his flattened lips long enough to say, “Let’s go.”
She’d won the fight. Why did her plummeting stomach make it feel as if she’d lost everything?
Chapter 23
“I’m shutting the phone off,” Tanya told Becca. It had been the longest day of her life. Not just because she couldn’t get into her house due to the media presence when Miguel had tried to drop her off earlier, but because she missed him so damn much. It had only been six hours since she’d lost her ever-loving mind and let her deepest, darkest fears win.
Becca picked up the phone and handed it back to Tanya. “You still need to hear from Josh. As soon as he calls you back, you can shut it down. You spoke to your parents and the people who actually care about you and aren’t just butting into your business.” Becca’s brow arched high. “By the way, you don’t owe Broderick jack.”
“I gathered that when you tried to wrestle the phone from my hands when he called. He was my husband.”
“No. He was your roommate.”
Too mentally drained to argue, Tanya rested her head on the back of the couch and closed her eyes. She’d told her friend everything that had happened, including the blowout with Miguel. Becca had been uncharacteristically quiet about it and hadn’t rendered an opinion.
Between eating her way through Becca’s fridge and fretting about having lost Miguel, she’d racked her brain in an effort to find out who’d leaked the information to the media. Who could’ve had access to the pictures she’d scanned and stored on the cloud? She couldn’t see a hacker breaking into her account.
Could it be Broderick? Would he betray her like that? What would he gain? Money. Lots of it. But how would he have known about Miguel being in costume? It could’ve been anyone who had access to her computer, and it didn’t help that she used the same password for everything. She’d have to rectify that.
Her cell rang and Becca answered it. Tanya sat in stunned horror as her friend told her brother everything. The whole sordid story, leaving out the amazing sex she’d shared with Miguel.
“I know, right!” Becca exclaimed. “I’ve been waiting for you. I knew you’d see reason.” Her laughter made the hair at the back of Tanya’s neck stand on edge. “Yeah. I’m going to put you on speakerphone now.”
“Are you there, Tee?”
Tanya glowered at Becca, attempted to snag the phone away and failed. “I’m here,” she mumbled.
“Becca tells me you’re holding up well.”
She shrugged even though she knew he couldn’t see her. “What else can I do under the onslaught of international defamation?”
Her brother laughed. “You’ll be all right.”
“Now that you know I’m fine, I’m going to shut off the phone so I can get some peace. Everyone I’ve ever known has been calling. Can you believe that Mom was excited?”
“She’s always wanted one of us to be famous. Turns out, it didn’t matter how.”
A giggle slipped out. There was nothing like talking about parental units with the one person who could understand the most. She loved her brother, but had to get off the phone before the collusion he had with Becca came to light. “Okay, little bro, I’m out. Thanks for checking up on me.”
“How are things with Miguel?” Josh asked, ignoring her.
She made sure her voice sounded upbeat. “Great. He’s done a fantastic job making the place over. His birthday party is two weekends away and everything is ready.” Hopefully, she’d finally get to see her brother after two months of him being in Africa. “Are you coming for his birthday party?”
He grunted. “The man threatened to send a private jet to come get me.”
A smile broke through Tanya’s misery while Becca laughed.
“My contract ends on Friday, so I’ll be there.”
She had to keep him distracted so he and Becca couldn’t go on the attack. She wouldn’t be able to handle both of them at the same time. “Where will you be going next?”
Becca shook her head. “Don’t answer, Josh, it’s a diversion. Tell her what we think about how she treated Miguel.”
Josh cleared his throat as if uncomfortable with the change in topic. “I was hoping you’d say it and I’d just, um, back you up.”
Her best friend glared at the phone. “Fine.” She raised her eyes to meet Tanya’s. “You’re making a horrible mistake. How long have you loved this guy? Since forever, right, Josh?”
“Correct.”
Becca tapped her chest. “Even I can see he’s changed, and I didn’t want you to get involved with him from the get-go. Now I’m on his side. He’s good for you. And Lord knows you’re good for him.”
Josh jumped in with, “The only reason I didn’t want him dating you back in college was because he wasn’t ready.”
“You mentioned this last month,” Tanya groused.
“It bears repeating. I’m sorry I got between you two back then, and if I’d known how he’d broken off whatever had been starting between you, I would’ve kicked his ass back then. Or gone to the hospital trying.”
Her widened, shocked gaze flew to Becca, who found a sudden interest in her fingernails. When had the little snitch told her brother? “That’s in the past and we’ve gotten over it.”
“No, she hasn’t. She’s petrified it’ll happen again,” Becca tattled. “And can you believe she thinks her financial status had any bearing on the
potential of their relationship?”
“Social standing,” Tanya defended. “We’re from two different worlds.”
“Uranus and Pluto?” Becca deadpanned.
Josh chuckled. “Uranus. Good one, sweets.”
Becca and Tanya froze.
“Are you two there?” Josh asked.
Becca swallowed audibly. “You just gave away our secret.”
“What?” Tanya’s eyes ping-ponged from her best friend to the phone. “You two are together? When? How?” She took a deep breath and started from the beginning. “What?”
Becca patted her on the shoulder. “I’ll explain everything later. Right now we have to get your head right about Miguel.”
“Uh, yeah,” Josh stumbled in. “When I spoke to him earlier, he sounded distraught. I’ve never heard him like that before. He really thinks he’s lost you.”
“Wait a minute.” Tanya pointed her finger at the phone. “This is the second damn time you’ve spoken to that man before checking up on me.”
“Only by a few minutes. He called me as I was about to dial you.”
“Huh.” Curiosity got the better of her. “What else did he say?”
“He felt horrible about you being caught in the cross fire. He also mentioned wishing you weren’t so stubborn.”
Becca giggled. “Don’t we all?”
Tanya ignored them as she gnawed on her bottom lip. Would she and Miguel be able to make it as a couple? She loved him, that was for sure. Wasn’t love supposed to conquer all? Just like it had all those years ago? the demon on her shoulder shouted. Did he love her like he’d claimed? How could she really and truly know?
Wouldn’t it be better to play it safe and stay away from him? And possibly never know happiness again? Could she live her life like that? Did she want to?
“He also said he had no clue about who gave the tabloids the information about you. Any idea?”
“I think it’s Broderick,” Becca said with a snarl.
“Not me,” Tanya rushed to say. “What would he have to gain?”