by Rye Hart
I felt a pang of sympathy for Gabriel, and for my friend who was clearly distraught that the woman who had given birth to her wanted nothing to do with her.
“I’m sorry, Alyssa,” I said, wrapping an arm about her shoulder. “I know it’s fucked up. Some people aren’t meant to be parents, you know what I mean?”
“No kidding,” Alyssa replied, sighing.
Even though I was not in a good place with my own mother right now, I knew she still loved me in her own way. Growing up with my mother hadn’t been a horrible experience. Money had never been much of an issue. She made sure that I had what I needed or what I wanted. Nothing drastic had happened until recently. It wasn’t until the past few years that she decided to start finding love that I noticed our relationship had completely changed in ways that hurt more than I wanted to admit.
“I’m thankful for my dad. He’s never made me feel like I can’t ever go to him with anything that is going on my life. Speaking of my dad,” Alyssa twisted around to look at me with a frown. “Are you sure everything is okay with you? The two of you looked like you were upset about something when I walked in.”
“It was nothing,” I said, rising from the bed to avoid Alyssa’s eyes. “He was upset with your mom, so I think that’s what you were picking up on. Everything’s fine.”
The lie felt bitter on the back of my tongue. I tried to keep my face straight when I turned to look at Alyssa as she gazed at me.
“Let’s go out for a little bit,” I said. “What do you say? Get some coffee like I suggested?”
Alyssa’s face visibly brightened at that. “Let’s do it.”
“I’ll get changed. There’s an old coffee and ice cream shop around here that my dad used to take me to.” I forced a smile on my face. “I think it’ll cheer you up instantly. What do you say?”
“I say it sounds perfect,” Alyssa said. “Let me tell my dad where we’ll be. He wanted to make sure that we didn’t run into my mom.”
“Sounds good. I’ll be out in a second.”
I slipped on a pair of jeans while I half-listened to Alyssa and Gabriel’s muffled voices in the next room. I needed to figure out what I was going to do. I knew that I couldn’t go home to New York, but I was no longer sure that I could stay here either. Though I told myself I could stay away from Gabriel, I knew it was a lie. It would take very little for me to end up in his bed.
CHAPTER NINE – GABRIEL
I awoke Saturday morning to the sound of Alyssa and Penny’s chatter as they walked down the hallway in the direction of the kitchen. The smell of brewing coffee followed a few minutes later. I rolled over to gaze out the window at the slow drizzle of snow outside. No matter how hard I tried to comprehend the past few days, I couldn’t wrap my mind around any of it. I couldn’t get past why I felt this indescribable urge to kiss Penny Marshall all the time. Things had transformed between the two of us at a startling pace, visibly alarming Penny.
It wasn’t right. I knew that it wasn’t, but I kept thinking about how good it felt to touch her, and to kiss her. All of it had felt so sinfully good that it left my erection throbbing with excitement all over again.
“Fuck,” I groaned, rubbing a hand over my face. “What am I going to do?”
I had other things to concentrate on that needed my undivided attention. Like the Miller lawsuit lingering over my damn head like a dark storm cloud. I handed over the papers to my own legal team yesterday, and while they assured me much of it was ridiculous, I knew it was meant to do one thing—to rattle me. Throwing my worries over my daughter into the mix only rattled me more.
For years, anxiety plagued me constantly over Alyssa’s need to have a female presence in her life to help her through womanly things that cropped up as she grew. She never once complained, but I knew that she needed that feminine influence.
Oddly enough, I noticed having Penny around seemed to fill in those gaps. She had someone to go shopping with, to get her hair and nails done with, and take trips to the spa. She’d had none of that growing up with me. It added to the guilt coursing through me that morning as I slipped out of bed. I padded over to my private bathroom to take a shower.
Penny’s gorgeous face resurfaced in my thoughts, and I reminded myself it had been a one-time thing. It had to be a one-time thing. That much, Penny was right about. Nothing could happen between us anymore. I made a mental vow to myself when I stepped under the hot spray to keep my distance until the girls went back to college. I would have to keep my urges under control, no matter how difficult it might be.
Penny and I still needed to talk about it, though. I needed to make it clear that I had no intentions of pursuing anything further. Penny was young, on the cusp of graduating college and about to enter an adult world for the first time. She didn’t need to get tangled up with an older man like me, who had more than a few issues clinging to his back.
The hot water eased the headache pounding furiously in my temples. I finished washing up before I could concentrate on any lingering memories of touching and kissing Penny. I dressed quickly in the slightly chilly air of my room before heading down the hallway to find Alyssa and Penny both sitting in their sweat pants in the kitchen with cups of coffee in hand.
“Morning,” Alyssa said. “Want some coffee?”
Penny glanced over her shoulder at me. Our eyes clashed together, and it sent jolts through me. I nodded to Alyssa’s question, and she got up from her chair to grab a cup for me. I kept the kitchen island between Penny and myself while I waited patiently for Alyssa to pour me a cup.
“What are your plans today?” I asked casually. “Anything exciting?”
“I think we are just going to hang around here,” Alyssa replied, sitting back down. “Maybe brave the Christmas traffic again to explore Chicago a bit more. I don’t want to be cooped up here all the time.”
“There are some nice museums here,” I suggested with a small smile. “I believe Penny might enjoy them.”
“How’d you know that I like art and museums?” Penny asked.
She gave me a long sideways look, but it was Alyssa who spared me from answering. “Because you’re always reading those books about art. It doesn’t take a genius to figure that out.”
“Oh.” Penny’s cheeks reddened as she looked back over at Alyssa. “A few museums would be nice. Something different than the chaos of downtown and the Christmas shoppers.”
“Dibs on the bathroom first,” Alyssa said. “I’ll get showered since it takes you longer to wash all that long blonde hair of yours.”
She reached forward to tug on an errant strand of hair framing Penny’s face before breezing by me. An awkward silence hung in the kitchen while I listened for the shower to turn on down the hallway. Once it did, I felt safe to try and talk to Penny.
“About yesterday—” I said.
“It’s fine, Gabriel,” Penny interrupted. “Please don’t make this more awkward than it already is.”
Penny slid off her chair, not willing to face me fully. I drummed my fingers anxiously on the counter top as I tried to figure out what to say that would lessen both of our nerves. I didn’t want to spend the rest of the week with this hanging over my head like everything else.
“I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable here,” I said.
“I’m not uncomfortable here,” she replied, sweeping up her mug of coffee. “It’s much better here than it would be going home to visit my mom for Christmas. Let’s put it that way.”
“I get the sense that is supposed to make me feel better, but I don’t know what I’m comparing it to.”
“You don’t need to know,” Penny said. “I have to get ready for the day. Thanks for trying to clear the air, but I’m an adult. I’m not necessarily an innocent when it comes sex.”
She left the kitchen with the last part of that sentence lingering in the back of my mind. Fuck me. Somehow, it turned me on even more. I ran a hand through my damp hair in aggravation as I left the kitchen to sit down at my desk to do a couple hou
rs’ worth of work. I needed to do something to keep Penny off my brain. It was an hour later that Alyssa stopped in the living room to kiss me goodbye.
“Do you want to come with us?” she asked, squeezing my shoulder and smiling. “It’d be fun to have you around. It’s a Saturday too, Dad. I don’t know why you’re insisting on working right now.”
I offered a forced smile because I could see Penny visibly stiffen in the foyer at Alyssa’s invitation. “You two go on. I have to keep working on this presentation. Have fun, the both of you.”
“Are you sure?” she asked.
“Yes, go on. Have fun.”
I let out a pent-up breath the second that I heard Alyssa and Penny shut the front door. I listened to their retreating steps and voices as they walked in the direction of the elevator before rising out of my chair. Nothing would ever make any sort of a relationship with Penny right. I sat down on the edge of the couch to flip through a few channels in an attempt to find something good to watch. Nothing caught my attention.
The buzz of my cellphone on my desk broke through the silence. I rose from the couch, tossed the remote carelessly on the coffee table, and looked down at the caller ID. This would be a good distraction, at least.
“Hello, Neil,” I said. “What are you up to?”
“Michelle and the kids have gone away for the weekend,” Neil said. “I thought enjoying the silence in the house would be nice, but I’m going fucking crazy over here.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose with a sigh. “I know that feeling very well.”
“I have a proposition for you,” Neil continued on. “Since Michelle is out of the house this weekend, I have no one to answer to.”
I rolled my eyes at his excited tone. “Good for you. Make sure to throw a big house party, drink all her alcohol, and then get the house cleaned up before she comes back home at the end of the weekend.”
“Very funny. I was going to ask if you wanted to go back to that club we were at the other night.”
I grimaced at the thought of alcohol after that nasty hangover the following two days, and the prospect of going back there didn’t sound appealing at all. It had landed me into some solid trouble.
“I’m not sure,” I replied, crossing the living room to gaze out the windows. “I have some issues going on here at the moment that started with that night.”
“Do any of those issues have to deal with Penny Marshall?”
I went rigid as a board at his suggestion. Swallowing thickly, I tried to think of a way around the question. I had no idea how Neil knew who Penny was, or that something had happened between her and I. It set me on edge, thinking that anyone had seen something that night. If they did, it was only a matter of time before something was said.
“How do you know about Penny?” I asked stiffly.
“Her name was brought up to me when I came back into the club to pay for my tab,” Neil said, and I could hear the frown in his voice. “I went back to the booth, but the curtains were closed. That’s when the security guard told me that you were talking in private with a woman named Penny Marshall.”
“That doesn’t make sense. The security details in there don’t even know her name.”
“Well, this security guard seemed to know her name,” Neil said. “It doesn’t matter though, Gabriel. I’m your best friend. Do you think I’m honestly going to say something to you about it?”
“You’re the one bringing it up,” I muttered tersely. Silence stretched on the other end. “I’m sorry, Neil. I’m just nervous with this clusterfuck of a lawsuit going on around me. I don’t know who I can trust anymore these days.”
“You can trust me,” Neil said firmly. “Whatever you do in your personal life is your business. I don’t want to know any details of it, but you’re right about one thing, though. You need to be careful about who you trust these days. That sort of thing could destroy your reputation in the public eye.”
I returned my gaze to the city full of people below my feet. The public eye had become very important to my career the moment I had gained the government’s trust. Scandalous reports about any impropriety with Penny going public could destroy my credibility.
CHAPTER TEN – PENNY
“I can’t figure out what is going on with my dad.”
My cinnamon spiced latte suddenly curdled in the pit of my stomach when I looked over at Alyssa sitting across from me. Her eyes were focused on the steady stream of people outside of the small coffee shop, and a concerned frown tugged at her lips.
Shame flooded me when I looked down at my drink. I didn’t know what to say, either, besides for the truth; the awful truth that would shatter our friendship. I couldn’t tell Alyssa, even if I wanted to. Things with my mother back in New York were strained enough. I didn’t want to risk losing the only good thing I had in my life at the moment.
I curled my fingers around the hot ceramic mug. “What do you think is going on?”
“I’m not sure,” Alyssa said, tapping a finger against her lips. “It’s something, though. It’s like he’s distracted over an issue that he can’t work out.”
“He’s under a lot of stress with his job,” I pointed out because that seemed plausible. “Plus, you’ve got things going on with your mom and the lawsuit.”
“It’s not his job. I know when he’s stressed from his job because he won’t ever leave the office. He won’t take phone calls, either. He goes ghost on everybody—including me.”
“I’m sure whatever it is, he’ll work it out,” I said. I hoped, at least. I didn’t know what to think about what kept happening between us anymore, or why I felt the irresistible urge to kiss him. This was my best friend’s dad, and yet, I couldn’t look past the fact that he made me feel so many wonderful things with just one simple kiss and touch. I wasn’t a virgin by any standards, but it had been a very long time since I felt something so amazing.
Maybe the forbidden nature of being with Gabriel drew me in more than anything else. The temptation of it. I sighed inwardly at that. It sounded like a cheesy romance novel that you picked up at the airport. But I felt a wild thrill rush through me every time I thought about kissing him again, or letting his hand slip back between my legs to caress me.
Alyssa twisted around in her chair to look at me. “I hope so. Listen, I have to tell you something that I haven’t told my dad yet.”
“What is it?” I asked, sipping at my coffee.
“You know how my dad is about me dating guys. He hates it. He tells me all the time to wait for someone to sweep me off my feet.”
I arched my eyebrows at her, not sure where this conversation was going. The last time I checked, Alyssa had been too busy with final exams and assignments to go on dates with the classmates at our school. Not that any of the men there were really Alyssa’s type. They were all frat boys who liked to party and bang as many college girls as they could get.
“You’ve mentioned that before,” I said. “So?” “There’s a guy here in Chicago that I used to go to high school with.” A smile spread across her face then. “We’ve been talking for a few months back and forth about hanging out while I was home. He goes to college here.”
“What is his name?” I asked curiously.
“His name is Scott Myers,” she said. “He’s a really good guy, Penny. He actually texted me on our way here to see if he could come join us for coffee, if you’re okay with that. I can’t really tell my dad because you know how he gets protective over me.”
“Right,” I said and watched as Alyssa pulled out her phone to text him. “How about I leave so that you and he can have some time alone?”
Alyssa looked up from her phone. “I didn’t mean that you had to leave, Penny. Please don’t think that was what I was implying.”
I waved her concerns away while I gathered my purse and sweater from the back of my chair.
“Don’t fret,” I said, smiling down at her. “Enjoy your coffee date. I don’t want to be the third wheel here, so we can h
ang out later.”
“Are you sure?” Alyssa asked.
I slid back into my thick sweater. “Of course. I didn’t expect you to give up all your plans because of me tagging along.”
“Thank you. You’re an awesome friend, Penny.”
I forced a smile on my face as Alyssa quickly resumed her attention to her phone. If I was such a great friend, I wouldn’t have let myself get carried away with Gabriel.
I stood huddled against the cold on the curbside, waiting for a taxi cab to pull over. Once inside the warm car, I rattled off the address to Gabriel’s condo, even if a part of me said it was a bad idea to go back. That meant having to face Gabriel alone for a few uninterrupted hours. The temptation of it startled me as I dug through my purse to pull out my vibrating phone. I glanced down at the screen with an inward sigh.
“What, Mom?”
Nothing. Just breathing. Heavy breathing for that matter.
My fingers clutched the side of my phone before I quickly ended the phone call. Just a random butt dial. That’s what it was. I didn’t want to think of the alternative explanation, which had been happening quite a bit over the past few months. The late-night phone calls, paired with the random ones throughout the day. My mother insisted that there had to be something wrong with her phone because the phone calls weren’t coming from her.
I had another idea of what it was, but I didn’t want to go there. I didn’t want to think about any of it right now. I rested my head against the passenger window to cool my feverish skin down.
The taxi cab parked in front of the condo building. I handed him a few twenty-dollar bills before exiting the cab to head in through the lobby. The security detail there didn’t even question me as I breezed by them. They knew my face by now. I took the elevator up to the very top floor and let myself in with the spare key that Alyssa had given me. The condo was bright from the late morning light. It was quiet while I slipped out of my sweater to head into the kitchen to make more coffee.
It was the sight of Gabriel standing in nothing but a towel near the kitchen sink with a glass of water in hand that stopped me short. I found my eyes taking in the strong muscles of his back where water trailed down the bumps of his spine before disappearing into the towel wrapped tightly about his trim waist. He turned to look back at me in surprise, which only revealed his well-defined torso even more. Water clung to the faint patch of chest hair that trailed teasingly down past his navel to disappear below the towel there, too.