by Magee, Jamie
I hissed as I thought of those stolen from me. “You do realize that more than likely he had heard his king plot of such a course, and that was where those revelations came from?”
“Maybe so, but even after all of this I have my doubts. Xavier never let Colton near him, or anyone really. I told Colton that was why he didn’t feel connected, that both Rasp and I were always with you and Vade.” She glanced down. “He wanted you to claim him.”
“What?”
“He wanted to be claimed by you so he could couple with me,” she stated nervously, judging every movement of my body.
“Mazing, he could have said that just so you would ask me, and if I had accepted it would have been an act of war.”
“I thought the same. That is, until I found him trying to plot his end. He stared at the mists each time one of you would let them fall, trying to see a defining mark on that essence. He did plot. He plotted to end his life and for me to find his essence and ensure that your mists collided with it.”
“That is beyond believability,” I bit out, knowing that as far as I knew, that was impossible; otherwise, all those in the past that had asked Vade to claim them would have discovered that very course of action.
“I agreed. But he said that he spoke to the Creator in his thoughts often and that he never felt a ‘no’ from him. He thought that as long as he held my image in his mind—your lines—as he perished, that he would find his way into your line.”
“We hear what we want to, Mazing.” That was meant for both her and Colton.
“I agreed, and I urged a delay. Promised him that a change would occur.” Her eyes moved into a past that brought her nothing but agony. “When you announced that our line would not invoke emotions, I told him the time was coming, that a revolution was coming. He said that he was going to come to you and beg to be claimed. The next day, I heard your fight with Vade, and I knew that him speaking to you then would not fare well, especially as enraged as Vade was. I went to tell him to wait, that you and Vade would find a compromise within a day’s time. That was when I saw what I saw. When I all but destroyed him.”
Mazing was tearing at her nails. At one time they were perfect, just the right length, perfectly sculpted, thick and healthy, but ever since that night she tears at them, refuses to let them hold any beauty.
I asked the obvious. “With all that has occurred, do you still feel that his words were true when they were spoken?”
“I cannot answer that.”
“You need to try.”
“That night…he kept saying my name. Like he was in some kind of trance. But my wrath would not let me see anything beyond that Creator-forsaken petal.”
“Did Colton ever tell you that Xavier was working with other lines? Did you sense them when you went to them?”
“No. Not once. Yet it all made sense to me that night. Anyone from Fielder’s line could invoke grief, and in turn the death of something. For all I know, Colton was trying to get Cadence to kill him so he could be with me. Even if that is the case—he touched her, said words that belonged to me. Impatience is one of the many toys of evil.”
“I don’t think he went to her for that reason. Xavier announced the girl’s name, that they would be coupled.”
She let out a sharp hiss before she spoke again. “Then I have nothing but wrath for my memories.”
I swallowed harshly as I prepared to say my next words. “He exists no more.”
All the color from her now nourished ivory skin vanished and she swayed unsteadily. I caught her as her knees buckled. Slowly, we fell to our knees as I held her shoulders up. I had to hold out my hand to tell Rasp to keep his distance.
I then cradled her face as I stared into her eyes, which refused to connect with reality. “I was told that moments before we reached Xavier’s throne, he shredded Colton’s energy.”
She moved her head from side to side in obvious refusal. “I felt him. I know I did. He has been within The Realm recently, on the higher levels.”
“All I know is what I was told.”
She knew Vade was my source. That he never spoke lies to me. That he very well did not have the power to. Silence was his way of hiding anything from me.
“It can’t be,” she said in a tone that was laced with imminent tears. I reached for her, but she pulled away. “Then you must do the same. You must have your vengeance with me before the Creator takes me—that is fair.”
“I have forgiven you, and the Creator will do no such thing.”
Tears streamed down her eyes as she began to shake. “He will. And you deserve to have the last blow.”
“It was a fever. It’s over. We will bring home the lost.”
“You don’t understand…” Her eyes locked with mine as her bottom lip began to tremble. “I coupled with him.”
I felt my energy seize with shock. Coupled Escorts combined everything; therefore, when one perished so did the other. The fact that Colton was shredded meant that if there was any truth to this, Mazing would have died that day no matter what actions I took.
“You did what?” My voice echoed along the streams. I held my hand out once more to tell Rasp to stay put and shielded my energy around both me and Mazing so Vade would not feel the out of control emotions from me and manifest at our side to witness the confession of the most fatal betrayal that has ever existed.
“I didn’t think it was real. Not until two nights before we died.” She was shaking uncontrollably. “One night eight moons after we were together, he asked me to meet him in the corporeal realm. He took me to a chapel and had a priest join us. I took it as playful and told him that was fun but not real. That night, he found three hundred and thirty-three holy men to wed us. He chose a different faith, town, country and dimension each time.” She was shaking so hard, she could not breathe. I reached into her essence and took the rage for herself away, but she kept manifesting more. “I dreamed that it was real, pretended with him each time, took Earthly vows, imagined that fate had not twisted us into lives we could not be together in. I breathed in the prayers spoken over us.” She moved her head from side to side in lost dismay. “He believed from that day that we were coupled in secret. Months later, just before the betrayal, after our rush, I saw our energy connect, I saw the beginnings of a bloom. I stopped it. I was terrified, but he was full of bliss. Told me over and over again that he was right, that the Creator had never told him no when he asked to be coupled with me…that is why he insisted on speaking to you, why I had to stop him, why I saw what I saw.”
I guess I always thought that Mazing’s actions came from wrath, that her pride was hurt that night, but it was very clear to me that it was her heart that was hurt.
I don’t know why, but my mind’s eye put me in her place, and Vade in Colton’s. If for some reason the Creator had placed me with any other king, I would have done far worse than Mazing had to reach Vade, and I know my actions would have been shadowed by the great King of Anger. Vade had told me more than once that his rush for me came before he even saw me, that as he and the Creator traveled to my deathbed he felt me in the air. That he felt life in the air and knew then that he would move heaven and hell to call me his own.
I had an even bigger problem now: I was in a weakened state. If this supernatural blow came to Mazing—if time and circumstance discovered that she was living and Colton was not, then her fall could very well kill me again. Our limited reprieve had just been markedly shortened. This was going to kill Vade on an emotional level so deeply that his line would feel the lash.
If I took out Mazing myself, no pain would come to anyone but her—and my heart. Creator help me, I could not do that.
I went to lean back so I could stand, but she gripped my arms. “Now, you have to.”
“I cannot.”
“I adore you. You are more than any title I could give you, and I know I’m the same to you, but you have to do this. It is the only way.”
“The way I see it—if this coupling was honored
, you would have died moments before I made our final deal, or at the very least when we returned just before. You stated that you felt him in The Realm. That must be the case, either that or the Creator feels you have served your time in death for this betrayal.”
Her eyes moved rapidly across my image. “Do you think we were gone long enough for him to be created again, and that is why I still live?”
“I cannot speak reason into a Creator that is forevermore my teacher. I’m telling you that I’m not killing you. That if our roles were reversed, my actions would be near the same. A rush is not felt deeply by many, but I can see this in your eyes. I can see the girl I am deep inside in your eyes.”
She glanced to where Rasp was standing. “Vade will not let this risk be left to chance.”
“And he will not harm you, for it will harm me. We are going to let this be, find the Fated in our line, and move forward in any way we are asked by the Creator.” I looked down at the ring on my finger as I spoke. “True rushes become one…for all I know, you are powerful enough to keep that boy alive in you; therefore, you keep our line intact. I want you to remember the blissful moments with him, and not the end. That is how you will repay me for this betrayal.”
She swallowed her tears and leaned away from me. Any sign of weakness was gone from her image. She stood slowly, holding the expression of a fearless First. “They are hard to forget…I will repay this grace one day. I do not deserve your mercy.”
I stood before her and let out a deep breath and gently asked the Creator with my thoughts for Him to mend my broken warrior, for Him to sustain her. I hoped against all hope that because I did not honor this coupling that the lore would not harm us.
My other wandering thoughts took over, and after a moment of silence I spoke again. “I don’t understand the past any more than I understand now. Something changed. Vade may not have the will to smite Silas or anyone else that was a part of me, but he could have very well imprisoned Silas and moved on. Why now?”
Mazing glanced over her shoulder at Rasp, who was now coolly staring at the springs. “Rasp told me why…the other sovereigns were invading the Veil. They’d suspended enough of the dead that reaching The Fall was no longer a hard feat. It was a simple few steps. You would have been discovered.”
I felt a sick rage in my core. I suppose deep down the girl inside now thought that Vade could no longer live without me, and he fought to reach me. But this revelation brought the sovereign I was front and center. He not only knew where I was but chose only to come for me when he had no other choice. I was a fool; he’d fed me, serenaded me with glorious music and candlelight, told me I was his rush—all the while knowing that he’d placed me on a shelf, like all of his other priceless possessions.
“So we were removed so we would remain a secret, not because we were missed or needed?”
Mazing recognized the wrath in my eyes instantly. “I believed we were missed, painfully missed.”
“We are not possessions that can be locked away, or worse, set free only to have chains around us, chains that take our power,” I seethed.
“The way I see it, you and I have nothing to lose. Our line is strong and will always be under the reign of Vade. If your absence comes once more, I will stand with you and claim any vengeance you want. It’s hard to fear death when you know exactly what is waiting for you on the other side.”
The internal battle began again. The real me, the girl, had everything to lose, and that everything was Vade, the rush he gives my soul with a thought. The sovereign in me was infuriated and screamed that he could not feel the same way if he’d knowingly locked me away.
“Rasp,” I stated evenly, still staring at Mazing, letting the energy around us fall so he could come closer.
Though we had walked a vast distance from him, he had heard my voice and manifested at my side.
“You are still bound by truth to me.”
His icy eyes glanced to Mazing, then to me as he nodded once.
“Am I considered a possession by your king? Tell me now.”
“In a sense, yes.”
“In a sense?” I fumed, throwing a glare at him.
“Is not one’s soul their possession?”
“One’s soul?”
Rasp smiled; I missed that cool, sensual smile of his. “He states often that you are his soul.”
“Does he?” I said under my breath as my failing glare appraised him from head to toe. He was so strong, perfectly sculpted, a breathtaking creation, one that I could see the likes of my rush within. Maybe that was why I could not take the full effect of my glare from my eyes at this moment.
“I want to know why I was shelved and now retrieved.”
“I cannot give you truth that I do not know,” he said, holding my stare and not daring to waver under the fury he could see there.
“You are at his side near constantly. You never heard him speak of such reasons?”
“I may be at his side, but I am not in his thoughts,” he said, raising his brow in a somewhat humorous way. “What answers has Vade given you to these questions?” he asked when he saw that I was in no mood for humor.
“Nothing clear.”
“Lack of words,” Rasp said tilting his head and letting his eyes rain down on me, as if he were trying to get me to see the obvious.
I turned to walk away, not wanting to look weak in front of him. He reached for my arm as I passed him. Staring forward, in that deep whisper he was known for he spoke, “My king, and closest friend, tried aimlessly to release the command to bring you home long before the Veil was thinned. The Creator chose not to give him words until such a time as He deemed necessary. The desire was there. The fiercest desire you could ever witness…” His icy eyes found their way to me. “I was pleased when his words came, for I feared that very soon my king would lose his faith in his Creator, and if he did so our line would lose the favor of the Creator and would face defeat, for the last symbol of our beginning would perish.”
“It would not, for I believe in the Creator.”
“Do you?”
“Why would you question that, Rasp?” I asked with disdain.
“A beautiful sovereign told me once that when you believe in something, you do not ask questions about how you will reach the point you feel called to—that point and the paths open for you when you believe there is a reason for everything. That if you are walking through hell at this moment, you can guarantee that bliss is on the horizon. That is, as long as you believe the former.”
My words. I spoke them to him not long after I was raised from my first death. All I felt then was bliss, I was young, feeling a deep rush for a favored king, the hell of my past life was gone, and nothing threatened my future. I never understood the hell I lived through as child, but I believed it would be nothing but a distant memory, that I had a fate calling me that I could not see. I held that belief, and because I did, I’d found my way here.
“I have missed you,” I finally said.
He tried to hold in a smile. “Barely noticed you were gone.”
When my mouth fell open, he laughed and pulled me to his chest. “You know they have a word for when old friends meet again; it’s called ‘hello.’ Even phrases like ‘How you doin,’’ ‘What’s up with you these days.’”
I squeezed him before leaning back and staring up at him. “You’re not mad at me for trying to kill you, are you?” I said as I playfully punched his rock hard gut.
“Me? Mad? Never. What does such an emotion feel like?”
I rolled my eyes. “I’m glad to see your humor is intact.”
“Just have a reason to smile now.”
“Right, then. Well, drop the formalities. To do what I have to do, I’m going to have to be what I was in the Veil. Formal words and grace are not going to be in play.”
“Oh, so you mean you have to be real? That blows,” he said with a playful smirk. “But hey, if that is your will, maybe you can work on bringing back my best friend to that l
evel.”
“Has Vade been really intense around you?”
“Intense,” he said, widening his eyes. “You could say that.” He sighed as he brushed off the past. “So what is the plan? Looking for a Fated?”
“I’ll find him when I touch the springs. That is not the hard part.”
“Na, the hard part is that he’s brainwashed.”
“Blind to his true existence. I’m proud that he was claimed.”
“That you should be, but that boy is fierce. He dared to take on two of our Fated at once.”
“And he is alive,” I said, angling up my chin in mock supremacy.
“Because one of yours stopped ours.” He smirked. “With a glance and a word or two. Must run in the line, that appeal you have.”
“Glad to see you find wrath seductive.”
A hum echoed from his chest, along with a sinful smile. “That I do, but she did not use such a power.”
“Then maybe I should ask for her help with Silas,” I mused aloud.
“Not a good plan.”
“Pray tell,” I breathed. The best way to get clear information out of Rasp was to keep him in a playful mood.
“She is the reason that the one he carries a fever for left him.”
“You’re joking.”
“Wish I was. She told Silas’ girl that she would adore one of Vade’s, and she was very right about that.”
“That is downright unnatural,” Mazing said, finally finding her strength again. She had pushed Colton’s memory deep down inside at this point, and she was still breathing; that was a good sign.
Mazing was right. The last thing anyone in my line would do would be to encourage heartache, and for that ache to be caused by another line, even if they didn’t know they were Fated, to me they should have felt that deep inside.
That green-eyed girl of mine must know something that I am blind to just now.
“Nothing about those peeps is natural, I can assure you of that,” Rasp stated with a bit of humor.
“Nice vocabulary,” Mazing said to him with a playful glare.