by Melony Ann
He glances at me. “I’m thinking about enrolling at ICE, okay? I was thinking I’d start fall semester.” He grips the steering wheel a little harder. “I don’t know how it’s going to work with all of these missions, though.”
I nod as I chew my lip. He’s right. We’ve been on far more missions lately then we ever have been. It’s like other mafia factions are coming out of the deepest depths of hell to fuck with my family for the simple reason that they think it’s fun. I can’t believe, after so many years, we have all these smaller gangs and mafias challenging us. It’s not like they don’t know who it is they’re fucking around with. My family is well-known. Even the police don’t mess with us. Though I don’t know if that’s completely out of fear or if my dad has paid off the right people. All I know is that the NYPD gives us a wide berth.
“I think you need to do something for yourself, Ry. Even if you don’t ever do anything with it. You’re the best cook I know, and you’ve wanted to go to ICE ever since we were kids.”
“I know. Okay? I know. But cooking is never going to be more than a hobby. I’ve always known that.”
“That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t do what you want to with your life now. Why not go to culinary school and travel like you’ve always wanted to without the stress of this fucking life?”
“It’s easier for you, Jas. You’re not the one taking over.” He shrugs again as he focuses on the road. I hate that I can see the entire weight of the world on my brother’s shoulders, and there’s nothing I can do about it. “We’ve all always known that you don’t want this life. We know you’re just helping out until you start your business.” He parks in the campus parking lot and looks at me. “You’ve got your entire life in front of you.”
“So do you.”
“I have a life of being a crime boss in front of me.”
I sigh and look at him. “It doesn’t have to be, Ry. Dad would give control to someone else if you didn’t want it.”
He shakes his head. “Do you really think dad wants to see his legacy given to someone not in the family?”
“You can’t always please dad, Ry.” I open the door and step out. I pause before I close the door behind me and glance back at him. “You need to do things that make you happy, or you’re going to make a pretty piss poor mafia boss. You won’t be able to turn it legit like you want to because you won’t care about it. You won’t care about anything.” I close the door and walk to my class.
When I get there, I drop my backpack on the ground and sigh heavily. Between last night and my massive hangover today, I have no doubts I won’t make it through the entire day.
There are advantages to being an eighteen-year-old from a rich and powerful family. One of them is being able to get into any club I want to, having the pick of any woman I want, and getting served copious amounts of alcohol if I want it. It helps that the club my brothers and I frequent is owned by my family. The rule is as long as we don’t drive home drunk and we all leave together, we can drink if we choose to.
That’s a good thing for me because drinking after a mission that involves shooting anyone, even if they are the worst human to ever walk the Earth, is the only way I manage to cope. That and fucking a willing woman until neither of us can stand.
“You look like you’re deep in thought,” a soft voice says next to me. I glance at her as she sits next to me. Pretty blonde, but I can’t remember her name, even though she’s sat next to me all semester.
“Uh… yeah. It’s been a bad morning.”
She smiles softly. “Kelly.”
“Right.” I focus back on my hands. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I won’t pretend to not know your reputation, or that I’m not your type.”
I chuckle. “It isn’t that. Truth is I…” I take a deep breath before I lean back and look at her. “My life isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Sometimes I feel like I’m two people. At night I’m one person. During the day I’m some rich kid who has the resources to get whatever he wants and act however he wants.” I shake my head as the professor walks in. “It’s fucked up. I just want to start my own life. Lead it the way I want on my own terms.” I look back at her while the professor sets up and everyone gets settled. “Too much to ask?”
She smiles softly and shakes her head as she bites her lip. My eyes are automatically drawn to them. I mentally slap myself. “No. Not too much to ask. But my question to you is what’s stopping you?”
I laugh as I focus back on the front of the room. “It’s not as easy as that. I have responsibilities to my family.”
“You act like your family is the ultimate say. Like you have no say yourself.”
I’m quiet. Didn’t I just tell Ryan the same damn thing? Fuck. If I don’t want to be part of the mafia, why am I allowing my father to drag me into missions? Why am I not putting my foot down and leading my life the way I want to?
“It’s funny. You just gave me my own advice. Maybe I should start listening to myself.”
She drops a hand on my arm and gives me a gentle squeeze before pulling away. “You sound like you’re a smart man. Maybe you should.”
I barely hear anything the professor says as Kelly’s words ring throughout my head. Getting my earlier advice to my brother thrown right back to me hit me hard. She’s right. I’m right? I shake my head slightly. I need to take my own advice. My family knows I want to start my own company. They all know I’m interested in developing property and making into something that can be enjoyed for years and by many. Whether that be a mall or a multi-million-dollar condo complex, I’ve never really cared. So why am I allowing myself to run missions when I should be concentrating on my studies?
I’m doing nothing but running myself into the ground. I barely sleep. Even if we don’t have a mission, I barely sleep. I can’t get the faces out of my head. They haunt me. Their family haunts me. No matter who they are, how bad they are, they have a family. Some woman out there is missing her son. Some guy out there is missing his kid. A wife. A brother. A sister.
Everyone has someone who’s dealing with their loss. Who am I to play God and take them away from their loved ones? How would I feel if someone took Ryan or Nick from me? I’d be devastated if I lost my dad or mom. So how can I continue to play mafia at night and be a normal college kid during the day?
Same reason as Ryan, if I’m being honest with myself. I may not like it, but it’s who I am. It’s where I come from. I can’t tell my father, the one who raised me and loved me and made me the man I am today, that I can’t or won’t help him out if he needs me. It’s not fair to him.
It certainly isn’t fair to Ryan or Nick. Asking them to do it all on their own is selfish. I may not want this life, but I can’t walk from it just like that. No. I need to leave it, but I need to leave it so it’s fair to everyone. I’d never be able to live with myself otherwise.
Chapter Three - Nick
The AR-15 strapped to my chest feels just as cold as the heart in my chest. The heart that I force myself to close off when I’m on missions. If I allow myself to feel, then I’ll end up a tortured soul like Jason. Our youngest brother isn’t like Ryan and I. It gets to him. Every single mission. Every single scream. Every single bullet. He does it because he loves his family, but he isn’t like us. He doesn’t forget and move on.
I follow Ryan down a dark hall and into an even darker room. Shocking. Considering how many windows are in the house, I’d have thought this room would have been just as bathed in moonlight as the rest of the house. Except that hallway.
“I can’t see shit,” Ryan whispers.
“I don’t even know where the fuck we are,” I whisper back.
“Basement.”
“How? No stairs.”
“We walked down an incline.”
“Huh…” I hadn’t noticed. Fuck. I need to pay more attention. Can’t expect to be as good as my big brother if I can’t even tell I’m walking down a fucking incline.
“There’s a false w
all in this room according to our intel. Should be to the right.” I can barely make out Ryan’s back as he moves to our right. I know better than to follow. I need to watch his back. Make sure no one sneaks up on us while he’s finding the false wall. I keep an eye on my brother and the other on the hallway.
“Level one and two clear,” Jason’s deep voice comes over our earpieces. “Cobra one and Cobra three are on the way down. Don’t fucking get trigger happy, asshole.”
I chuckle. “It would serve you right for making Penelope cry the other day.”
“More where that came from.”
“Both of you fucking focus. The Bird isn’t going to catch himself,” Ryan growls.
“Listen to Cobra two,” dad chuckles. Ethan Crane may love us and let us get away with a lot of banter and brotherly competition, but he’s serious as hell about missions and this mafia. Our job is to get our target, the Bird. The time for fucking around comes after. Right now, our focus is our target and survival.
“Got it,” Ryan says. The wall he was feeling around gives way and opens into a secret chamber.
“Damn,” dad says.
“What the fuck?” Jason whispers. My eyes widen, and I’m speechless.
“How… the… fuck did we not know about this?” Ryan grunts as he kneels down in front of the young, frail woman on the floor.
I look around the small room in shock. My eyes widen when I recognize her. “Fuck… She’s in my fucking history class.”
Ryan looks up at me as Jason and our dad guard the door. “How long has she been missing?”
I drop next to her and feel for a pulse on her neck. I don’t care that Ryan just did it. I need to feel it for myself. “She hasn’t been there this whole week.” Her pulse is weak. Dangerously fucking weak. I look up at Ryan. “What do we do?”
“Cobra two to Cobra five. Get down here. Everyone else. Look for the Bird. He’s not here.” Ryan looks at me. “Help me get her up.”
“Yeah.” I help Ryan to gently pull her up and it’s only then that I can see her scratches and bruises in the dark. Barely, but they’re prominent. Even in the dark I can see how fucked up she is. “Fuck, Ryan. What happened to her?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t know, bro.”
“Where’s the Bird?” I ask.
“I don’t know that either.”
Jason lets our guard into the room. He glances at us and then the girl before glancing at dad. “Sir?”
“Take her out. Get her to the hospital. Go,” dad says. The guard lifts the girl in his arms and leaves. “All teams cover Cobra five. Look for the Bird.”
I let out a long breath. “Have we ever lost anyone before?”
Ryan and Jason glance at each other before we all look at dad. I can just make out him pinching the bridge of his nose. “No. At least not in a long time, son. Come. We need to find him.”
We all sigh and follow. We check the rest of the rooms in the basement before making our way upstairs to meet the rest of our teams. There’s a flurry of activity in the house, but no target. No Bird.
“How the hell did we miss this son of a bitch?” Jason asks, shaking his head in bewilderment.
“I don’t know, Jas. We’ve almost always gotten our guy. Since I’ve been on missions, we never failed. This is just as new for me as it is for you,” Ryan says.
“Everyone clear out,” dad commands. “Surveillance Team, stay on the house. Anything changes, advise me.”
“Yes, sir,” one of the other guards says
I sigh heavily as we all clear out of the house. The four of us walk to the black SUV we arrived in. Jason kicks a rock, and I growl. Ryan leans against the SUV and lets out a breath. I lean next to him and look down the hill to the house shaking my head.
“I just don’t get it,” Ryan says finally, breaking the silence. “We had him. Surveillance didn’t see him leave.”
“Maybe he didn’t.” I shrug and blow out a breath.
“He wasn’t in there. We all saw it. No Bird,” Jason says.
“Maybe there’s another passage way. I don’t know. A secret tunnel. Another room we missed. Would we have known about that without someone telling us?” I shake my head and continue to focus down the hill.
“I think you might be right, son,” dad says as he begins focusing in the same direction I am.
A movement catches my eye to the side, and I step forward. “Shit. Holy shit, he’s right fucking there,” I whisper pointing a couple houses down. Sure as shit, our Bird is slithering like a snake between a couple wooden fences. My entire body thrums with electric adrenaline as I take a step forward.
Ryan puts a hand on my arm. “Don’t. Watch.”
I shoot him a confused look but I trust him. We wait until the Bird has disappeared between a couple houses before dad makes a move. He signals us to follow, and we all do silently with our weapons drawn. When we get close to the houses, we catch a glimpse of him squatting down in some overgrown bushes. Dad signals Jason and Ryan to go around the back side of the house while we go around the side.
“Cobra two in position,” Ryan whispers as dad and I crouch and hide out of sight of the Bird.
“Hit from behind. We’ll come in from the side. Watch for crossfire. On my count,” dad whispers. “Three… Two… One… Go!”
Like a well-oiled train, we all stealthily converge on the Bird. He sees me and dad and immediately pops up from his hiding place. He turns and takes off running. Unfortunately for him, he runs directly into my brothers.
I can’t help but laugh. “You fucking idiot.”
“Did you think for a moment you could run from us after what you did?” dad asks the Bird.
The Bird bursts out crying as he sinks to his knees, knowing the end is near for him. He covers his face in his hands. “I’m sorry! I’m so sorry!”
“Shut-up,” Ryan growls. “You’re pissing me off. Get up and face this like a man. If I have to drag you back to the SUV, I’m going to fuck you up.”
I look up when a light comes on upstairs in one of the houses. “We need to go. Now.”
Dad follows my gaze and jerks the Bird to his feet. “Up. Scream, and I’ll shoot you dead.” Dad drags the Bird to the SUV and throws him in the back while me, Jason, and Ryan keep a lookout on all of the houses.
“Cobra two to all teams. The Bird is secure. Clean up and clear out.”
“Yes, sir,” one of our team members says.
“Good job, son. Nice catch on seeing him. It’s pretty dark out. I can’t say I would’ve seen him if I hadn’t been following your gaze,” dad says as he claps me on the back.
I smile at the praise. “Thank you.” I slide in on one side of the Bird as Jason slides in on the other. Ryan jumps in the driver’s seat as dad climbs in next to him. The Bird whimpers as we close the doors. “Let’s head to the boathouse. It’s closer, and we don’t need to worry about waking mom.”
“Good thinking, bro,” Ryan says, shooting me a wink over his shoulder.
Being born to a law-abiding family who never did anything wrong, but sometimes not having enough food to eat, and then being taken in by a powerful family who makes all of their money on illegal businesses and criminal activity is something I still find completely ironic.
I came from a very poor family from the wrong side of Manhattan. My parents never really gave me much attention. I was looked at like the reason things sucked so much for us. We were lucky we didn’t get shot sleeping in our beds at night. Or… at least I am lucky I didn’t get shot sleeping in my bed. My parents. They weren’t so lucky.
When I was ten years old, my parents were killed in our apartment. The apartment was ransacked. I’m still not sure how I survived. I woke up when I heard our door being busted in. I ran to my closet and hid underneath a pile of clothes in the corner.
I believe in fate and miracles because of that day. Whoever killed my parents searched the house afterwards. They threw clothes and toys all over my room, even from the closet. But they ne
ver found me. They came close, but they never found me.
I stayed underneath that pile for hours. I didn’t even come out when the police showed up. I was too scared. When I finally did come out, I packed up a backpack full of food and another one full of clothes.
I ran. I didn’t get far. I was only a kid. I slept the first couple of nights in an alley near a restaurant behind a dumpster. One night, the restaurant owner saw me. He chased me out. Called the police. I ran again. I found a group of homeless people living near an overpass. I did my best to blend in amongst them. Most thought I belonged to someone.
Except Joe. He knew I didn’t belong there. He looked out for me. For six months, he had become the only family I had. He taught me how to survive. He taught me how to ration my food. He taught me how to hide.
Our homeless camp was ransacked one night, though. My birthday. My eleventh fucking birthday. Drug dealers who wanted the territory, but not us. For the second time in my life, I hid. I watched everyone I had become close to, including Joe, killed that night while I hid.
It was also that night that Ethan Crane showed up with what I looked at as my saving grace. I was the only survivor. He took me in. Ryan and Jason both accepted me as one of their own. Jenny looked at me like a third son. Overnight, I suddenly had a family. A family who not only provided for me, but loved me and accepted me.
I was raised just like Jason and Ryan. I went to private school. I got a trust fund. I grew up the son of a mafia boss. Ironic, but something I’ll never be upset over. I regret nothing. I’ve not only been taught that I’m worthy of love, but also found a strength I never knew I had. I’ll never hide again. I’ll never have to.
“Hey, you with me over there?” Jason asks.
I jerk my head a little and clear my throat. “Yeah. I’m here.”
“Good. Ready to do this?”
I nod and open my door as Ryan stops. I drag the Bird out and throw him to the ground. “We know about the drugs. Tell me about the girl.”
The Bird cries as my dad and brothers encircle him. “I… can’t…”