I may not claim to be an artist to the world, but I was one. It flowed through my veins more than football. It was an innate instinct inside me to take note. To pay attention to everything. I knew it more than most that it was the things that weren’t said, or often covered up, that you had to pay the most attention to.
I fixed my pants while she buttoned up her blouse. When she finished, I reached for her and kissed her, but not the way I did before. This was with more passion.
“I’m seeing you later. Don’t say no,” I told her.
She smiled and brushed her nose against mine. “Believe me, I’ve been trying to regain the power to use that word, but you won. Cole, I don’t want you to get in trouble.”
I pulled back and beamed at her. “Vanessa, if I wasn’t in trouble, I wouldn’t be Cole Buchanan. Be worried when I’m not in trouble. It’ll be fine, baby.”
She chuckled. “I’m starting to think I should follow you to Philadelphia to keep you on the path of goodness.”
My eyes widened. “Yes, you should come.” I was serious.
“I’m joking. I have to work. You have to play.”
“Fuck work. Come to Philly with me.”
“N…” she began but couldn’t say it.
“Great, babe. I’ll come by later to help you pack.”
“Cole, if my magazine sounds like shit, it will be your fault.”
“Don’t worry, your mom’s a lot easier to deal with than you are.” I gave her my trademark wink as she laughed and got out of the car before she could try to argue. This time though it looked like she might not.
“See you later.”
“See you later,” I replied and willed myself not to look back as I walked away.
I had about two minutes to get on the field.
Finding that fence I jumped it, landing right near where the bleachers ended.
I was so crazy. So damn crazy, and I would be an idiot to not admit that I was crazy for her.
Right through training, I did the same autopilot thing I had since being with her. Catch the ball, run with the ball, throw when necessary, don’t let the other side get the ball, keep an eye out for Eric, Gilly, Sam, or Denver. It was almost like a game of chess. You look to use the best guys. If you saw them, you just went in for the kill. To me that meant Gilly as the quarterback was as powerful a piece as the king, queen, knight, or bishop. A piece that could win the game.
I was a man who knew his talent, and I could run as fast as lightning. I could also accept when someone else was better than me, and he was.
I was on autopilot going through the motions, but I had to admit we had a good practice session and we were on fire.
I showered quickly and got ready to leave. Before I got to the door though I saw Denver in the corridor with two women. One I knew.
Brittany Tate. She gave the press a story I wished she hadn’t a few weeks back. I knew it bothered Vanesa a lot, like everything else did.
They saw me, and Denver smiled, beaming from ear to ear.
“Bro, come out with us. Look who’s here.” He laughed a deep hearty laugh, and Brittany bit back a smile.
“Sorry, can’t. I’m busy.” I shook my head.
He gave me an incredulous glare and rushed up to me. “What the fuck’s wrong with you? That’s Brittany Tate, and her tis look bigger than the last time she had them done.”
“Denver, you know I’m with Vanessa, right?” I stared him down.
“With her, like with her?” He raised his brows.
“I’m with her. Doesn’t matter what capacity, I’m not going with you.”
“Come on, what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”
Brittany made her way over as I’d expected and dreaded. I was kind of hoping she would hang back with her friend. A few years back, I was really into her. I mostly loved ‘em and left them after a night, but we’d hooked up a lot.
“Hello, stranger,” she cooed. “Don’t tell me I heard you decline Denver’s invite to come with us.” Her bright blue eyes flickered with mischief. Against that white blond hair, they were striking.
“Hi, Brittany. Yes, you heard right. I’m busy.”
“With your new toy?” she asked.
“Looks that way,” Denver added. “Are you serious, man?”
“I’m serious,” I answered.
Brittany stepped closer and ran her fingers over my chest. “Not even a round for old times’ sake?”
“No.”
I stepped away from her, my eyes on Denver, who really was looking at me like I was crazy.
As I walked away, I realized I definitely had changed, and it was time to acknowledge why I had.
I wasn’t just busy.
I was leaving to be with my girl.
My girl.
Vanessa.
Chapter 18
Vanessa
Two weeks ago, when Eric proposed to Mia, I was pretty certain the whole world heard her scream.
Even I tried to guess when he would pop the question and had to give him kudo points for the way he’d kept us in suspense and the way he did it.
With the football season over, we’d all gone out to dinner to celebrate.
He knew Mia too well and knew that while she would have loved to be proposed to in some private garden somewhere beautiful, she would have loved having him propose in public a lot more.
Just because it was exciting and adventurous. Just like them.
So, he had the waiters bring out the ring, and he asked her to be his forever right in front of our parents and the whole family.
Cole was my date, and it was nice having him there to watch such a beautiful event. It was the first proposal I’d seen.
Tonight was the engagement party put together at the DoubleTree. Cole and I made a guest appearance and split after an hour.
I never thought we could be crazier than we were during the football season and the back and forth travelling across states, but as the last whistle blew signaling the end, it was like we just took off.
It was the first week of January, and while the rest of the guys were focused on the Super Bowl, Coleridge Buchanan was focused on me.
Me, the shy wallflower, as the media had put it a few months back.
We’d been together for exactly four months this week, and it was the most exciting time of my life. Me before him was… I struggled to think of the part of my life that didn’t include him.
I thought I was lost in him before, but that was nothing in comparison to how I felt now. It was like that every time I was with him
We crashed through his bedroom door with my legs wrapped around his waist. He rained hungry kisses all over my mouth. Soul kissing me and sending me over the edge with the rawness he used to claim me.
We collapsed into the bed and tore the clothes off each other, me trying to touch him everywhere I could, and him doing the same to me. I never wanted him to stop.
If we spent forever like this, I would be happy. Definitely happy.
“Please, let me be inside you, no barriers tonight,” he whispered into my ear.
My heart sped up at the wild thought. No condoms, we’d just rely on my birth control.
“Yes,” I breathed, returning my lips to his.
He kissed me gently then pulled back to part my legs. He guided the fat head of his cock to where I craved him the most. The feel of his warn skin on mine drove me wild with the need that danced through my veins.
His grip tightened on my hips, and he slid into me, his hugeness as always filling me up completely but feeling so much better tonight from the skin-to-skin contact.
God, it was unreal. Completely and utterly unreal. He felt it too, I could tell from the expression on his face and the pace of his movements. He hooked my leg around his and secured me so he could drive deeper, faster, harder.
It felt so good. So good he brought me to climax in just a few strokes.
Then I lost my mind when he really started to fuck me hard.
; Held captive to the maddening lust that clasped us within its grasp, I felt my mind slipping. I’d thought so often that I was near the edge, and sometimes I’d felt when I’d gone over. I had those times. However, there was a point when I could see the ground approaching, and I could stop myself from falling straight to the ground and hitting the surface.
Not tonight.
As mindless ecstasy gripped me with scandalous pleasure, it severed me completely and utterly from reality, from logic, from all that I willed myself to do and not to do.
Don’t fall for him?
Really?
Too late. I’d fallen.
The emotions that swept through me came with a force I couldn’t grasp.
It was truth, it was real, and it was me. It splintered my mind with the passion that coursed between us, and as we came together, I knew there was nothing I could do about it but accept it.
He pulled me into his arms and held me. How could I resist this when it fell so right?
How could I deny this?
I loved him. I loved Cole, but I …
I didn’t think he could love me too. I didn’t know if he could or if that was what he wanted.
I didn’t think he loved me.
The dark thought hit me, and a reminder of Gage’s words. Guys like Cole just want fun.
Well, for me it stopped being about fun.
Morning came, and we lay in each other’s arms in silence. We’d ended up downstairs on the floor of the living room. Earlier, we’d come down to eat, and he’d ended up eating me instead.
I was listening to his heart beating steadily within his chest, and he was thinking. I couldn’t begin to guess what he was thinking about because my poor mind was a sea of thoughts. A myriad of a million thoughts and possible scenarios of how I was going to love a man I wasn’t sure loved me.
I thought of my parents, who’d always been such great examples to me. They were my first people I took note of to shape my life around. I’d always wanted the love they had. I was the weird kid who’d always be staring at them to see how they behaved with each other. How Dad always found some excuse to come see Mom in the middle of the day at work, and that was outside the usual breakfast and lunch meeting. And Mom was always on the phone to Dad. They took Fridays off for themselves, not allowing their busy lives to get in the way of spending time together.
The biggest thing of significance with them was that they made things simple. They were always on the same page, and nothing was complicated.
What I had now was complicated because I didn’t know what Cole and I were. I couldn’t and hadn’t told people he was my boyfriend, even though people at large knew we were seeing each other. That was a given after the gossip that flooded social media and the papers.
I just didn’t think it was wise to assume more.
“I want another painting of you,” he said, breaking the silence.
I lifted my head and looked at him.
“Another one?”
“Yes.”
I smiled when he ran his finger over my cheek. It was funny how I’d been so wrapped up in my thoughts, but the slightest touch from him could bring me right out.
I was about to say yes when we heard the main door to the house open.
Cole frowned and sat up. “Who the hell is that?” he muttered.
Thank God I had the good sense to grab the blanket next to us and cover myself because two seconds later, his mom pushed the door open to the sitting room and walked in on us.
Us together on the floor, naked.
I gasped in horror and hoped like hell she didn’t think I was some kind of slut. I supposed, though, that this meeting didn’t exactly lend to any other conclusions. Me on the floor of the sitting room wrapped in a blanket, clearly naked, with her son didn’t say anything other than sex.
I’d seen her many times, but we hadn’t officially met, and this wasn’t the way I’d imagined meeting her.
“Jesus, Mom!” Cole shouted.
“Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” Patricia Buchanan winced, face completely scarlet.
But no redder and brighter than mine.
She backed away but first glanced at me, and there was a sparkle in her eyes.
Cole turned to me when she closed the door. “I’m so sorry, Vanessa. I wasn’t expecting her.”
“No, it’s me. I should have left earlier.” Because I had work.
I should have left at least an hour ago, so this was totally my bad.
“No, don’t be ridiculous. It’s not like you kept you here.”
“I’ll just go.” I gathered the blanket around me and moved over to the sofa to get his shirt I’d worn down here last night, but he stopped me. He tugged on my arm and pulled me back to him.
“No… I know this is weird, but stay. You could meet her, properly.” There was a flame of admiration in his eyes that reached out to me. All this time, and he’d met my family many times, but mainly because he kind of already knew them.
It was a bigger deal for me to meet his mother.
“Are you sure? I feel so bad. God, what must she think of me?” I brought my hands up to my cheeks and winced again.
He chuckled. “It doesn’t matter. I want you to meet her.” He nodded.
“Okay. I’ll go grab my actual clothes and come back down.”
His face brightened, and hope sparked within me. This was a big deal, and I hoped it meant something. He wanted his mother to know me, so that had to mean something, right?
I got dressed, albeit in last night’s clothes minus my accessories.
It was a little skater style dress that could pass for casual, but a closer look at the silk fabric definitely gave it away as something more suited to an evening dinner or celebration like my sister’s engagement party, which I’d escaped from with the man of my dreams.
When I got downstairs, Cole was already in the kitchen with his mother.
She was holding a mug of coffee and laughing at something he’d said. He was dressed too, in a long-sleeved T-shirt and Levi’s. He had that messy bedhead look I loved.
They looked at me, and Patricia’s cheeks tickled pink. He looked like her. They had the same face, warm brown eyes, and sandy blond hair color.
“Hi,” I said super nervously.
She set her mug down and walked over to me, hand outstretched to shake mine.
“Hi.” She smiled.
I shook her hand. “Sorry about earlier.” I was going to elaborate but thought I’d leave it at that.
“It’s fine. I was young once too.” She nodded. “It’s good to meet you in real life after a forever of seeing your paintings and drawings.”
My eyes snapped open with sheer surprise. Cole had said painting was something he shared with his mother, but I hadn’t realized that he’d shown her the paintings and drawings of me. It was silly to assume that since it wasn’t like they were hidden away in his gallery. He’d had them on display.
“Oh, you saw those.” I glanced at Cole.
“Right from the first one. It’s a battle and a half to get your fourteen-year-old son to tell you the name of his mystery fairy girl,” she bubbled.
Fourteen.
I looked to Cole again, who’d rolled his eyes at her. “Mom, please, no embarrassing stories.”
“Are you kidding? I’m supposed to do this, and she’s here, so I am,” Patricia snapped back with a melodious laugh. She returned her gaze to me, and her eyes lit up with mischief, reminding me a lot of Cole. “I hope you’re here for a while. I have a lot of stories.”
I nodded. This was nice. It really was.
I just wondered though. We had all this history. He seemed to have been into me from way back when.
Patricia said fourteen.
What had stopped him from being with me?
Chapter 19
Cole
“So, that’s her…” Mom said.
She set down two mugs of hot chocolate on the worktop.
I’d just entered th
e kitchen after seeing Vanessa off.
Mom had made a lunch for us that was to die for, and now she was setting up bait with her famous deluxe hot chocolate and her don’t-even-try-to-evade-my-questions stare.
I smiled at her, walked over to the high stool, and lowered myself to sit.
“Yeah, that was her.” I nodded.
“Are you seeing her later?”
“No, not until tomorrow.”
We had training later. Not officially because Coach had given us the week off. However, Gilly wanted us to meet briefly to discuss some tactics for the Super Bowl.
I agreed to go. I knew a few of the others weren’t going because they wanted to take advantage of the time off, but I really liked that there was interest outside of the schedule to meet.
Plus, I also knew that Vanessa wanted time to finalize her magazine.
I looked at Mom and knew what she was going to say. Her face said all. This was the talk she’d probably been waiting to give me her whole life.
“I really like her, Cole.” She nodded, taking a sip of her chocolate. Her hair had grown substantially, and it was now a little longer than mine.
When she was having chemotherapy and she went bald, I’d shaved my head so she’d have company. I knew it would have meant more if I’d been a girl, but she knew I liked having my hair the way it was now. I’d also kept my hair low on purpose and didn’t start growing it out until recently when hers started growing.
Now we looked the same again.
She was giving me that look of expectancy, setting the floor open for me to talk, but I actually didn’t know what to say.
I smiled at her though.
“I’m glad you like her.”
“Not much to dislike about Vanessa Cartwright, Cole.” Her smile widened. “Boy, you are unusually quiet. But then you always are when it comes to her. I first found your drawings of that girl when you were fourteen, but you’d been doing them a lot longer.”
I nodded. “Yes.”
I was twelve when I first saw her. She was ten years old. We were both in middle school. We’d just moved here when Dad got the deal with The Centaurs.
Not Before Game Night (Bad Boy Bachelors of Orange County Book 4) Page 14