by Robin Roseau
"Five warriors," she said. "Four companions."
I smiled. "I heard the story of Maya's first adventure here. Do you remember it?"
She nodded. "She tied our hands."
"Do you remember what happened before that?"
"I didn't see it, but she beat up two of Daddy's thugs." She smiled. "Nine warriors."
"To be fair, Maya is better than Jasmine. But yes, Jasmine is more than a match for anyone living here."
"And neither of them are considered warriors? But Maya told us she killed that demon with just a knife."
We talked about that for a while, and then Chandri came out with our meals, platters of food we could pass around. She handed out plates and silver. There was also a pot of food. "It may be easier to pass plates," Maya said. "Send your plates to the middle. Rora and I will serve what you need and send them back."
"Two modest bowls of the stew for the girls," Lia said. "If they're still hungry, they can have something else after that."
"And more bread, Mama," Annalise said.
Lia caught me gazing at the girls. She raised an eyebrow.
"Sometimes I wish-" I paused. "But I wouldn't give up my life. I mean, I wish it weren't necessary, but because it is, I'm glad I'm there doing it. I've had a relationship with my sister I never would have had if we'd stayed in Gallen's Cove, and I've made such dear, amazingly dear friends."
"Ah, the mirror to me," Lia said. "I understand entirely. I wouldn't give up my daughters, but I think your life would have suited me."
I passed down the stew to the girls, and Lia turned to them for a moment, helping them with bread but telling them they've had enough honey. They didn't fuss. Once they were settled properly and warned about eating slowly and without making any more mess than was absolutely necessary, she turned back to me.
"It can be hard," I said. "You are not upgrading your living arrangements. I'm sorry. We do what we can, but until all of Morehama echoes Chandri's sentiments, we make do with what we have."
"I understand, Chief Beria," she said. "Make no apologies."
"And the voices." I looked away. "They can be bad sometimes."
"Oh. I'm sorry. Um. Does your companion need to be a lover?"
"No," I said. "I have had no lovers since becoming a warrior. It is just touch and a desire to soothe. If you watch Maya, you will see if there is a warrior anywhere near her, she is touching that warrior. See, even while she is eating, she is touching Malora. I wouldn't be surprised if she has kicked off her boots and slid a foot over to find some bare skin of Badra."
Lia looked under the table. "How did you know?"
"She's my sister. I would have sat next to her instead of this resolute mountain-" I nudged Nori.
"What? Wait your turn," Nori said.
"But Maya sent me here. Maybe she wanted Tamma free to visit but thought Badra would need some touching."
"So, anyone can be a companion?"
"I doubt your brother's wife can."
She laughed. "Perhaps not. Are the voices after you now?"
"They started a while ago."
"But we're touching. Am I not helping?"
And we were touching, but only our legs, side by side on the bench, and it was through my leathers and her dress.
"Maya can soothe through clothing, but you'll see she even makes sure to find bare skin."
I felt a hand on my back, and when I looked over, Lia was moving her hand up my back, her fingers coming to rest on my neck. "Like this? This is what Maya is doing with Malora."
I smiled. "Yes. It's not enough to soothe the voices, but if it keeps them from getting worse, or at least slows them down."
Nori passed a plate over, so I set it in front of her. She stared at the food for a moment.
"Did you want something different?"
"No." She turned back to look into my face. "Are the voices bad?"
"Not so bad," I said. "I can typically go a few days, if I have to, although I am told I grow irritable. I believe the accusations come from the misguided who have never spent significant time around my sister."
"I heard that," Maya said, looking at me. She looked at Lia and smiled before turning back to whatever conversation was going on at the other end of the table.
"I don't understand," Lia said. "I thought it only took a minute or two to silence the voices, and it lasts for hours afterwards."
"It depends on who does the silencing, and there's silent, and there is really silent. Really, I'm fine."
"But you shouldn't have to suffer needlessly," Lia said. "There are all these companions here. If I'm not very good, but they can help you, why don't they?"
"They do," I said. "But we've been sitting for a while, and they're busy."
"All right, but I'm right here. What do I do?"
"Lia, really, it's fine."
"Don't you want my help? Is there something wrong with me?"
"No, Lia. You're wonderful."
"Lia," Maya said, "Beria doesn't like to ask. She hasn't asked anyone for help in years. But if you just do it, she won't push you away, either." Then she turned to Malora, rotating her body to put her free hand on Malora's cheek. She leaned forward and buried her face in Malora's neck, her forehead against Malora's cheek.
"Oh," said Lia. And then she shifted on the bench, and when she pulled my head towards hers, I let her. She weaved one hand deeper into my hair, the other on my cheek, and her face buried against me.
"Like this?" she asked.
"Yes. This will quiet them."
"All the way?"
"No, but it helps. Thank you, Lia."
"How long does it take?"
I didn't answer. It wasn't sufficiently intimate to make them quiet, but it was enough to help.
"How long, Chief Beria?" she asked again.
"Talk to Maya sometime later," I said. "You're going to start rumors."
"I don't care. Do you?"
I laughed lightly. "Only if you do."
"Mama."
"I'm sorry," Lia said as she pulled away.
"Thank you, Lia. That was nice."
She turned to her daughter, but she kept a hand on my neck for the rest of the meal, eating one handed. It felt nice. The voices weren't silent, but they were muted, and I was long accustomed to them.
Lia attended to her daughters and talked to Tamma and Badra. I listened to conversations on both sides of me. We finished dinner. Chandri and some of the other women cleared things for us, then Benton and Grace came out. We thanked them for an excellent meal.
"We're hoping you'll mingle," Grace said. "Everyone wants to talk with you. And I see a fiddle."
"I'll play in a while. Perhaps we can move the tables to the edges and make room for dancing," suggested Maya.
"I was hoping you would suggest that very thing," she replied. "We'll have diners for another hour or so, but we can move the tables after that."
So we all got up, stretched, and looked around. Lia gathered her children and took them somewhere to clean up. I moved a small distance from the table and turned around to look at that people. I expected Maya to come around the table and soothe me for a few minutes, but she didn't. None of the other companions made their way to my side, either. So I mentally shrugged and did what I always did: ignored the voices.
The one that told me Maya was angry with me was annoying, but I knew if I talked back, they would only get worse.
I leaned towards Nori. "So, what are we supposed to do?"
"Look like we're friendly," she said. "I never learned how."
I laughed.
"You and Lia are getting along."
"Mmm," I said. Then I grinned. "Do you think I'd scare them if I wandered around and said 'hi' to people?"
"Yes." But she grinned at me.
"I suppose. I am a pretty fearsome warrior. Grr."
Rora turned to me. "Let your hair down."
"What?"
"Let your hair down," she repeated. "Here, I'll do it." Without waiting, she
stepped behind me and unbraided my hair, handing me the tie I used at the end of the braid. She combed it out so it settled around my shoulders. Like Maya, I had a lot of hair.
"There," she said.
"It's going to get in my way," I complained.
"It softens you," Rora explained.
"It needs a brush now."
"It's fine," she said. "Go talk to people."
"What do I say?"
"Hmm. 'Hello.' I start with 'hello'. Then maybe share my name, if they don't bark at me. Ask them what they do. Answer their questions. Really, Beria, you've been talking since you were five."
"I was younger than five!"
"Not according to your sister." She smirked at me. "Seriously, you've been talking since you were five-"
"Two! Maybe one."
"Whatever. I think you know how by now." She gave me a little push. Behind me, Nori chuckled.
I looked around, then decided to roam around the room a little and say 'hello'. Just to see what happened. I considered it an experiment.
The room had a mix of long tables, such as the one we had all sat at, and a few tables for four. I felt eyes following me, both at my back and of the villagers. I stepped past one of the smaller tables, occupied by four men, and the occupants watched me. "Hi," I said.
"Hello, Amazon," said one of the guys.
I smiled and stopped. "Will you be staying for the music? My sister brought her fiddle."
"I believe we will," the man said. "Will you dance with me?"
"I. Um."
"Amazons don't dance with men," one of the other guys said, and his lipped curled a little. "They only dance with other women."
"Be nice, Sandar," the first man said. "Ignore my friend. He's got a case of terminal idiot."
Sandar hit his friend, a glancing blow across the top of his head. The first one barely noticed.
"So?" he asked. "Will you dance with me?"
"You know, the last man I danced with was my father. I was thirteen. I'm not sure I know how."
"We don't do anything fancy here," the man said. "Think about it."
A third man at the table asked, "Do you know how to use that sword?"
"Yes."
"Perhaps you'd like it if a man showed you how to use his sword. I bet you've never seen that."
The first man said, "God, you're a bigger idiot than he is." He gestured to Sandar. Then he looked at me. "Ignore him, too. He's being an ass."
I smiled. "I've seen men try to use a sword. They don't usually know where to point them."
All four men laughed, which I didn't understand.
"What's your name?" the fourth man asked.
"Beria. You should call me Chief Beria. I am the village chief at a village called Lake Juna."
"Ah, Chief Beria," the fourth speaker said, the one with his back to me, looking over his shoulder. "This idiot," and he gestured to the third speaker, "is Gardo. And this smooth talker is Mandy. I am Chardon."
"Pleased to meet you," I said.
"I still say she won't dance with you, Mandy," Sandar said. "She's already making moves on Lia."
I'd been ignoring the voices, but suddenly they all began tormenting me. One said, "He wasn't talking about a sword, you naïve woman." Another said, "He carries his sword between his legs, not on his hip." I began to color as I realized what the man had meant to imply. I realized I could beat a hasty retreat, but I decided to go on the offensive. Diplomatically.
I looked around, saw an empty chair, and grabbed it, dragging it back to the table. I sat at the corner between the two who hadn't proven to be rude idiots yet.
"Do you men know what Amazons do?" I asked.
"We know what you say you do," Sandar said. "Some claptrap about demons."
"Claptrap?"
"I did tell you to ignore the idiot," Mandy said. "I was only a kid, but I saw the demon head."
"Well, the demons are real," I said. "They typically are about nine feet tall, not counting the horns, which seem to be between two and three feet long and razor sharp. They are big and fast. They're bigger than the biggest black bear I've ever seen and bigger than most brown bears. They run on two legs almost as fast as a horse in a gallop and have four arms with claws between four and six inches long, also razor sharp. When we first engage a demon, they pick one of us and begin to talk in our heads. And even after we kill their bodies, they continue to talk in our heads."
"Bullshit," Sandar said.
"I currently have nine demons in my head. I didn't understand the reference to a man's sword and took it literally, but the demons are having a great amount of fun telling me what a naïve girl I am and suggesting I invite all four of you out back. One of them told me I should then use my sword on the lot of you. Two more are describing what you would do to me, starting with holding me down on the ground. One continues to insist that's how I was conceived." I looked around. "You get the idea."
They all shut up. Even Sandar looked embarrassed.
"When you make comments like that, you give the demons ideas. We don't really appreciate it. Not that they have any trouble tormenting us anyway, but why help them out?"
"I didn't mean nuthin'," Gardo said.
"As for Lia, she was helping to still the voices. It was just touch. The demons don't like companions, and they shut up for a while, but it doesn't last. I wasn't making a move on her. I was letting her tell the demons to shut up."
"Gardo is sorry," Mandy said. "Aren't you, Gardo?"
"Yes, ma'am," he said. "Real sorry."
"Thank you. You are forgiven. But just to be clear, I have trained twice a day, every day of my life for the last seventeen years, to use my sword. I am very, very good with it. We also train with the staff and in unarmed combat. None of us would ever, ever hurt an innocent. But there's not a one of us that is helpless. Now, you're lucky you made those comments to me, because I can laugh them off. But if you said that to one of the companions, her warrior would be honor bound to invite you out to the village green and exact a very, very vigorous apology. That would be horrible diplomacy, and I'm sure no one wants that to happen."
Then I smiled. "Mandy, Chardon, if I am asked to dance, I will happily give it a go, but I don't promise to know how."
"Ma'am."
"Chief Beria," I said.
"Chief Beria," said Gardo, "I really am sorry."
I smiled. "Then think no more of it. Gentlemen." I climbed to my feet and returned the borrowed chair where I had gotten it. Then I turned around and returned to the other Amazons. I was going to ask Maya to help, but she was deep in conversation and had one hand on Malora, another on Nori.
Lia and Tamma were talking with a third woman, much younger than both of them. I looked around and saw Rora and Badra had the girls in an intent conversation. I walked over to the group of sisters and sort of moved in between Tamma and Lia.
"Oh, Chief Beria," Tamma said. "This is my little sister, Challi. Challi, this is my village chief, Beria."
"I'm pleased to meet you," I told her.
"Tamma was telling me about Lake Juna," Challi said. "It sounds lovely."
"It is," I agreed. "I may take no credit for the beauty of nature, and I didn't even pick where we built. But I am proud of it anyway. You should come to visit, although it is nicer in the summer."
"I'll have to think about that," she said.
Lia and Tamma were both looking at me.
"Are you all right?" Tamma asked.
"I'm fine," I said.
"I saw you talking to Gardo," Lia said. "Was he an ass?"
"He's always an ass," Challi said. "Do you have to ask?"
"He apologized," I said.
All three of them stared at me. "You got Gardo to apologize?"
"I told him what the demons were suggesting I do in response to his question. He may have been a little intimidated."
Lia turned me to face her. "I thought I put them to sleep."
I shrugged. "You quieted them. I can usually ignore them
."
"Lia," said Tamma, "she needs a companion. Right now."
"I'm fine," I said.
"Yeah, right. You tried to go to Maya, but she's busy, so you came to me. But you need more than Badra likes to see me give anyone else."
Tamma had never said that before. "She doesn't like you soothing me?"
"She doesn't like watching it," Tamma said.
"I'm sorry," I said, "I didn't know. Um. I'll go talk to Maya."
I turned to step away, but Lia moved in front of me, then stepped directly into me and wrapped her arms around me. She pressed her face into my neck and pulled my head down so I was leaning against her. I automatically moved my hands to her neck.
It took a few minutes, but the voices quieted, then went still. I sighed and slumped in relief. "Thank you."
"You're welcome," she said. "Better?"
"All the way quiet. Thank you."
"You're welcome." She pulled away and smiled at me. "Easy job if you can get it." She moved to my side but kept one hand on my neck. Then Tamma moved to the other side, also touching me.
I looked over at her questioningly. "Badra doesn't mind this," she explained. Then she leaned closer to whisper into my ear, "I'll explain more later."
I nodded.
"I love your hair," Challi said.
"Thank you, Challi."
"You let it out of its braid," Lia observed. "Why?"
"Rora said it would make me look softer and less threatening."
"She's right. I like it this way."
"It gets in the way," I said. "It's better braided."
"There are no demons to fight here," Lia said.
"Malora wants us to mingle," I said. "I don't seem to be very diplomatic, though."
"Hmm. You got Zora to apologize to me," Tamma said. "You got Gardo to apologize to you. You must be doing something right."
I laughed. "Maya will play music later, and there will be dancing. Will we make anyone uncomfortable if we dance together?"
"Probably," Challi said.
"Are you going to let that stop you from dancing with me?" Tamma asked. "Does Nori dance?"
"I've never seen it. Maybe you should ask her."
"Maybe I will," Lia said.
"I'll let you three catch up, but save a dance for me."
I stepped away, taking a different path through the room, avoiding the table I'd already dealt with. A few people nodded to me, but then a group invited me to sit with them. This was a mixed group of three men and three women, and two of them moved apart while someone fetched me a chair. I sat, and one of the men asked me what I was drinking.