He knelt down in front of me pulling my panties to the floor. There was no embarrassment. We had a physical history together. I didn’t have the mental capacity to feel vulnerable about my nakedness.
“Tru, I don’t know what I’m doing?”
“You think? You’re starting to scare me, Jewels. I don’t know how to help you. God knows that I’m doing a piss poor job. A tragic thing happened to you, to be sure, but you’ve got to get a grip. You can’t put yourself in harm’s way like this. You’re too important to me.”
I took his face in my hands. “How do I get a grip? Tell me and I’ll do it.” I was desperate for the one answer that would heal this hurt.
“Let’s start with a shower. We’ll figure the rest out.” His tone was reassuring.
He led me into the shower and then removed his soaked suit- the one he had worn to the service and fell asleep in earlier. He walked in behind me. The hot water ran down my body. Henry gently caressed my skin, removing the soil before lathering my hair with shampoo. When he was done, I turned to face him.
“I will be okay. Tell me I’m going to be okay,” I demanded.
“You will be. We’ll get through this together. Give yourself some time. Be patient.”
Henry held me under the water until it turned lukewarm. After drying off and slipping into my robe, he led me back to bed.
“Get some sleep. It’s almost morning. Kate will be arriving soon.”
I nodded while he pulled the covers over me. The image of the stranger popped into my head. I became curious regarding his identity.
“Who was that man in the cemetery?”
“What man?”
“You didn’t see him?”
He looked puzzled and concerned. “No.”
“There was a man. I may be a little off the reservation, but I’m not seeing things.”
“Okay.” Henry tried to sound affirming.
“Okay.” I closed my eyes before I had to see his disbelief.
“Love you.” He left.
I woke from the first restful sleep I had had in months. Rolling over, I hoped my arms would find Henry, but my bed was empty. I pulled myself to the clock- ten. Kate would be arriving shortly.
My feet found the floor. I went into the bathroom to view the damage, expecting to find my face swollen and distorted, but I was pleasantly surprised. Besides the two saddlebags under my eyes, I could pull off plain-not spectacular, but adequate. I surveyed my hair, pulling stray curls vertical, pinning them up to wash my face and brush my teeth.
The knock on the door was measured- Kate. My heart lightened. She slowly pushed it forward as I aggressively pulled it back, landing her on top of me as we fell to the floor.
“Well, that’s quite an entrance,” I roared. “Ouch. My belly.”
We laughed loudly. It was the first ounce of joy I had truly felt. My best friend had arrived, ready for the day in her swimsuit.
“I don’t do anything half-way,” she announced proudly.
She noticed me looking beyond her into the hallway. She answered my question before I had a chance to ask it. “He’s gone.”
“Who?” I wasn’t a girl who played dumb well.
“Who? Whatever. Suck it up. You’re so transparent. He gave me marching orders and left for New York. My brother will be back in three days. Deal.” She pulled herself up and jumped on the bed. “Which rules shall we break first?” She seemed excited at the prospect.
“Was there one regarding alcohol?” I asked.
“That was number one so it should be the first to be broken, don’t you think? Ah…it’s good to see you.” She pulled me up beside her and surveyed my stability.
“It’s good to be seen. Your brother must have told you that I’ve gone mad.”
“He did instruct me to hide the butter knives and toss the razors. Looks like its mushy food and hairy legs for you.”
“I haven’t been myself.”
“He mentioned that. Why don’t we picnic at the beach? Put your suit on. I’ll pack a hamper full of food and booze.”
“I don’t have a suit.”
“Henry told me that, yes, you do have a suit. He instructed me to tell you to look in your drawers and I quote, ‘Don’t make excuses about leaving your room’. So, chop, chop. I’ll be downstairs.”
Kate was my polar opposite in looks and style. She was shorter than me with shoulder length, dark blonde hair, which was stick-straight. She was into fashion and always looked polished whether she was going to sleep or like now, in an expensive bathing suit cover-up that probably came from a couture house in Paris. She was every bit Henry’s sister. The entire Walker family had the look of royals.
I was so thrilled to have Kate in the trenches with me. She busied my thoughts with mindless talk about mutual friends and acquaintances. Our five minute walk to the beach was filled with immense laughter. She took her role as best friend very seriously, vowing to keep me occupied until Henry returned.
The sky was overcast. After we laid the blanket down, and set up the umbrella, we spilled out the contents of the picnic basket. Disappointment washed over my face.
“Beer?” I was thinking of something a bit harder.
“Pace yourself, Jewels. It’s only lunchtime.”
“How long are you staying?”
“Indefinitely.”
“Sounds perfect. How can you manage that?”
“I’m in between jobs.”
“What happened to the magazine gig?”
“I got sick of writing about mundane shit.” She paused and struggled with finding her words. “Who cares? It’s silly stuff, really- of no consequence…nothing to burden you with.”
“Please, burden me. The statement I promised to write for the Chimbote police is due tomorrow. Until then, I don’t want to think about my crappy existence. Let’s talk about your crappy life.”
“Well, when you put it like that, I feel much better about having told my boss to sod off. It seems like the right decision now…getting fired and all.”
“You did what? Does Henry know? He got you that job.”
She shook her head as fear flew across her face. “And you better not tell him either. Same rules apply as they did in college. We take secrets to the grave.”
In an instant, Kate realized what she had said to me. She was speechless- not an easy accomplishment for her. I broke the ice by raising my beer to hers.
“-To the grave.” I hit her brew with mine and her face relaxed a bit.
“I’m an idiot. We know that about me. I’m sorry. What I meant was…”
“I know what you meant. Stop stressing. I can’t have you editing yourself around me. Not you. Everyone else does that right now, but not you. Agreed?”
“So I can say stupid things?”
“Yes, be yourself.”
“Ah, touché.”
We heard the wind snap and our heads turned to the sound. A man and a child were on the boardwalk, near my old, weather beaten, cottage, flying a kite. The beautiful colors of the dragon with its long tail whipped through the air, turning left and then right. The boy’s face was blank- disconnected.
“Who’s that?” Kate inquired.
I was intrigued. “I have no idea.”
“They’re on your property. Are you still renting out the cottage?”
“Yeah, that must be it. The realtor didn’t call, or maybe she did, with me away, I don’t know. Should we go over and introduce ourselves?”
“No. I think no,” she said.
“He’s waving.” Now I felt awkward.
“Maybe he’s hot. It’s too far to tell.”
Kate turned back toward him and waved her best beauty queen wave. I tried to study his face as I returned his glare. He seemed vaguely familiar, but I couldn’t place him.
“You have a one track mind. Someday, one day soon, someone is going to steal your heart right from your chest.”
“Well they better hurry before I jump super dad. Do you think he�
��s married?”
“You are too much. You have the hormones of a teenage boy, Kate.”
“No. I have the hormones of a thirty something gotta have it hottie. There is a big difference.”
“And what’s that.”
“Experience. I know what I have and how to use it.” She looked over to our neighbor. “Ooh, I bet he does too.”
I chugged the beer and lay back, pulling my straw hat over my face.
“What do you think is wrong with the boy?” Kate’s wheels were spinning.
“Why do you care?”
“I don’t…just curious.”
“The man probably lives inside of a fish bowl, with people staring at him, using their curiosity as a weapon. It’s unpleasant, trust me. Leave him be. Lay back.”
“I didn’t mean it like that.”
Kate felt the disgust in my tone which I found hard to disguise. We were best friends. She could take it. I moved the hat to the side so she could see my face.
“I know. Everyone is well meaning. It’s just hard living in a glass house when so many people are on the outside holding stones. Not you, but everyone else. You’re the best. You’re outside the glass house with alcohol. Now, lay back. Let’s sun.”
Kate slowly relaxed, turning on her side, pretending to read a magazine so she could spy on them. She thought she was in stealth mode, but her attempt was clumsy. I glanced over and made note of their interactions. The boy didn’t respond to any of the man’s conversation. He didn’t show any interest in flying the kite. He sat on the sand, staring into the liquid blue that filled his mind’s eye. He was trapped somewhere else. I sympathized with his broken compass. The man, however, had a look of genuine contentment on his face, like he wished for nothing better- at least nothing different.
“Are you sure you don’t want to introduce yourself?”
She answered, casually flipping through the pages, “No. He probably has a wife.”
That was that. They stayed for another twenty minutes and then vanished. We didn’t even notice their departure. That was probably the alcohol kicking in. The rest of the afternoon was spent drinking, laughing, and splashing in the wake of the waves.
Henry called to check up on us under the guise of giving Kate a message from her mom. I wasn’t fooled and neither was she. I was pretty sure that he was onto us for breaking rule number one. The conversation was circular like he was trying to trip me up. He felt it necessary to remind me of the statement I had promised to prepare. I brushed him off and changed the subject, but he was adamant that I have it ready and so I agreed- again. Kate was the last to speak, hanging up on him mid sentence, but it mattered little to me. I didn’t have a care in the world.
As the sun went down, we tried to gather our things. Either the sand was very uneven or we were very intoxicated. We stumbled as we walked back to the main house, leaving our stuff just inside the front door. Unanimously deciding to skip dinner for sleep, we pulled each other up the stairs and collapsed in my bed.
“Bloody hell, I have to pee,” she announced.
I started to push her toward the edge of the bed, but she fell off, causing a loud thud which was only trumped by the hideous laugh that ensued.
“What the hell, Jewels?”
Her head poked up above the covers and she looked like she was seeing double.
“Sorry. I didn’t want you to wet my bed. I was trying to be helpful.”
“Well now I’ve peed myself so piss off.”
“Don’t be like that- it was an accident.” I pulled myself to the edge of the bed to make amends, not suspecting that she was out for revenge. The next thud I heard was me being pulled over the edge and crashing onto the hardwood below.
“Now I’m not mad,” she said with a grin.
“Why is the floor wet? Awe Kate.”
4
Banging and screaming roused us from bed. My mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton balls. Leaning over the side, I hoped to find a bottle of water, but no such luck.
“Who is making that racket?” You don’t wake Kate in this manner. Ever. “They are going to wish that they never stepped foot on that porch.”
“Stop yelling.” I covered my head with a pillow. I was officially hung over.
“I’m not yelling. They’re yelling. Get up.”
“They’ll go away,” I insisted.
“They’re still banging.”
“Just call 9-1-1.”
“And say what? Annoying Americans are knocking on a door? Get up. This is your house. You’re coming with me.”
She pulled the covers off and threw a robe at me. I took no notice that I was still wearing my red bikini- Henry’s selection. I begrudgingly reached for the white, terrycloth bathrobe and stuck my feet in garden boots before following Kate downstairs. She had made the extra effort to find pajamas last night and was in a better state to entertain company. She looked through the sidelights of the door and turned back with eyes the size of tea saucers.
“What’s wrong? Who’s here?” I inquired.
She stood in front of the door, her body making the shape of the letter “X”.
“Let’s go back to bed.” Kate grabbed my arm and started to pull me toward the staircase. I turned under her hold and headed back to the door. She quickly caught the back of my robe and yanked me to a halt, jumping back in the lead.
“Whatever you do, I need you to promise that you’re not going to freak out.”
“Kate, you’re being ridiculous. Why would I freak out?”
“On the other side of this door is…” she hesitated.
“Go on.”
“Promise me that you’ll behave first.”
“My head hurts and I’m really tired. No games. Who is it?”
“Judas.” She stared back through the sidelights, angry.
“Priest?” I was too hung over to play word association.
“Not the rock band, genius; the lying, cheating, traitor that should be hung from the nearest tree kind of Judas.”
The edgy New Yorker rose up within me. I had a gut feeling who was behind the damn door.
“No way. He wouldn’t be that foolish, right? Jackson is here? -At my house? -On my property?” I dismissed the assumption and shook my head in disbelief.
“Yes he would- he’s Jackson.”
I started to walk towards her with an agenda. “Step aside.”
“I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”
I turned and walked back into the drawing room and took the shotgun from above the fireplace. Kate followed me, managing to keep her body between me and the door.
“What are you doing? Let’s just think about this for a minute,” she implored.
“Step aside, Kate.”
As we found ourselves in a stare off, Jackson’s voice broke the tension.
“I know you’re in there. I can hear you. I’ve called the police. I just want my car.”
Kate was pissed. Her plea to behave civilized was null and void. “No he did not just say that- after everything that’s transpired.”
She spun around and charged the door herself, violently pulling it back, sending it crashing into the foyer wall. Scared, Jackson cowardly shuffled back until he fell off the veranda. Kate continued her forward attack to the edge of the porch.
Hesitantly, I walked to the door, catching the first glimpse of him in ten months. I thought I’d be sad, but I only felt relieved that he was now my ex-husband. He looked like the same old loser, wearing his ridiculous banana yellow windbreaker.
In the moment, I couldn’t recall why I ever had married him. Average looking, he was too short and scrawny for my usual taste. He had no muscles and was devoid of a butt and proper calves. I never could figure out how he kept his socks up. His graying hair was like wire which matched the patches poking out from inside his ears. His tobacco stained front teeth were pushed together. When he ate, he resembled a rabbit gnawing food. The clothes he wore were always mismatched and rumpled. He wa
s the polar opposite of Henry. Perhaps, that’s why I chose him. My heart would never be stolen away by someone like Jackson.
Looking at him now, I was actually repulsed. I didn’t care that my criticisms seemed hypocritical, considering my current choice of wardrobe. I had potential when I tried really hard and no matter what, he would always be a mean prick with no style. I was a good person. I had that going for me. I wasn’t condescending in my interactions with people. I treated strangers with kindness and respect. He was always frigid and hostile. Bring him the wrong order or question him and he’d make you feel like the most insignificant person in the room. He was never wrong. He was never accountable. He was the world’s most dedicated narcissist and I was done.
“Why are you here?”
“For the car, Julia- I just want my car and I’ll leave.”
“But our son...Why didn’t you come…he’s buried behind the chapel.” My eyes began to water, but I wouldn’t cry in front of him.
Kate jumped off the veranda, stopping within a foot of him. He gave his typical sour smirk to let us know that he wasn’t afraid of two weak little girls.
“You’re here for a car. Seriously? Your son was buried this week, you wanker. Where in the hell were you? What could possibly be more bloody important than that? A car? There’s no hope for you. You’ll always be a self-absorbed bastard with no heart.” She threw her arms up in the air, moved five feet away from him, and looked back to cheer me on. “Shoot him.”
The shotgun rested across my body, finding a home on my right shoulder. Jackson looked at me puzzled and decided that laughing was a good emotion- bad choice.
“Get off my property.”
Kate disappeared into the house returning with a golf club. Jackson still maintained his annoying grin
“Look, I don’t want trouble from you scary women.” He was mocking us now, waving his arms back and forth above his head. “Really Julia, are you gonna shoot me? You don’t have it in you.”
“Care to test that theory?” I pointed the gun above his head and pulled the trigger. He cowered, momentarily, shielding his face, but regained his composure and stood erect.
The Battered Heiress Blues Page 5