Meredith smiled for the first time. “You’re an amazing man, you know that.”
“No.” Wayne shook his head, sadly. “If I was an amazing man, Christine wouldn’t have fallen out of love with me in the first place.”
Meredith put her hand on his arm. “I’m truly sorry. At least on good days I’ll be able to delude myself into believing Ben still had some love for me.”
Wayne stood. “I’ll send Graham over this evening to help with the chores.” He paused at the door. “What are you going to do now? With the farm, I mean.”
Meredith shrugged. “I’m not even going to think about that until after the funeral.” She stood and kissed Wayne on the cheek. “Thank you for coming over. I really needed this.”
Wayne patted her on the shoulder. “We’ll get through this together.”
At his vehicle, Wayne kicked the tires hard. It didn’t even begin to alleviate his burning rage.
Chapter 38
When they got back to the B&B after grabbing a bite to eat, Jared said. “I need to quit thinking about Mom for a while. My mind and body both need a rest.”
“Yes,” Elizabeth agreed. “We’ve learned a lot today but discussing it over and over is not going to make it any clearer. I’ll help you into bed and then I’ll go do some work on my article.”
“Could you pass me the laptop,” Jared asked, when in bed. “Meredith really pushed her poems on us today and it’s the first time she’s let me read her poems-in-progress so I’m curious. Once I’m finished that I will do some editing on mine.”
Elizabeth headed out with Chevy for a walk, disappointed that Jared hadn’t asked her to stay. “Well, you told him you needed to do some work,” she chided herself. “And he feels bad about keeping you from your writing.”
She hadn’t gone very far when suddenly her cell phone rang, startling her. Chevy barked at the noise. She looked at the display. Jared. Was something wrong?
“Hey, Elizabeth,” Jared said, excitement in his voice. “You have to come and read this.”
Meredith’s poems, she thought immediately. What had he discovered? Elizabeth picked Chevy up and hurried to his room. He pointed at the laptop with Meredith’s poetry on the screen.
Fade In
Act One
Interior-Kitchen-Evening
Two women are sitting at a kitchen table. There is a tea pot and two cups on the table. One pours the tea. The mood between them is strained.
I go that evening to visit Christine
She is quiet, cool, unfriendly.
I am hurt. I do not understand.
She is my best friend, the one
I had picked berries with, the one
I had raised chickens with, the one
I had confided in for many years.
Why has she changed, I wonder?
What has happened in their marriage?
Why is she leaving?
I have yet to know why she needs
my forgiveness.
End Act One
Fade Out
Fade In
Act Two
Exterior-Street-Night
Snow is piled high in the yards. Vehicles are parked in front of those yards, some of them hidden by the snow. The street lights illuminate the street. One truck is parked and running. It is cold and the exhaust rises. A man is sitting in it watching a house. A few houses back another vehicle is running. A woman is watching the man.
I am driving away from Christine’s
when I see you pass by.
You do not notice me, so intent are you.
I turn around and follow,
wondering where you are going.
I see you park near her house.
Have you come to talk with her
to try and help, like I have?
But you sit and watch her place.
When Graham leaves, then you go
to her door, pound on it.
She is there yet she won’t let you in.
End Act Two
Fade Out
Fade In
Act Three
Exterior-Night-Porch
A man is yelling and banging on the door of the house. Then he begins kicking it with his foot. Finally, it breaks. He enters the house.
I cannot believe that you broke her door.
Why would she not let you in?
I have to find out. I creep onto the porch.
I listen to you begging her to stay
begging her to love you again.
Pain grips my heart. You love her, not me.
She has a knife, stabs you.
I grab her toaster, strike her.
I go to you, ask you
“Do you not love me?”
You laugh and say. “Help me.”
I reach over and pull out the knife.
End Act Three
Fade Out
Elizabeth looked at Jared. “It sounds like a confession,” she said.
“Yeah, that’s what I thought,” Jared agreed. “She doesn’t actually say that she plunged it back into him four times, but she is admitting to being there.”
“We just may have to see her again tomorrow,” Elizabeth grinned.
Chapter 39
Christine’s Story
Every night, for weeks after the murder, Christine just lay on her bed and stared up at the ceiling of the basement of their house. She hadn’t wanted to move back to the farm, hadn’t wanted to be under the same roof with Wayne, hadn’t wanted to face Graham, but Wayne had insisted, stating she couldn’t live on her own. As soon as she’d been charged, she was let go from her job. She’d hired a lawyer and when she heard how much it would cost, she’d given a month’s notice to her landlord. Since all the money she had saved to move to Vancouver was now going to her lawyer, she’d moved back to the farm.
As far as she could see there wasn’t much difference being on the farm or in jail. She was in a prison here, even if it was a prison of her own making. This room was her cell and she left it to make the meals, do the dishes, and wash the clothes. Once those duties were performed she returned to the room.
The few times she left the farm were for the visits she made to her lawyer. Sometimes, Wayne accompanied her. She never went outside to help with the cows or to get the garden ready for planting, she never stayed upstairs longer than she had to, and she never watched television or listened to the radio.
The only thing she did was lie on the bed, stare at the ceiling, and run the events of the past two years over and over in her head. She always began with the first night she and Ben had spent together and how they had agreed never to do it again. And then onto the second time when they had vowed that was the last time. From there the picture in her mind showed them meeting at the hotel and how romantic it seemed to have a lover. She heard herself justifying her actions by saying she didn’t like the farm, didn’t love Wayne anymore, and she had a right to find love somewhere else.
The first feeling of guilt had come when Wayne and Meredith had insisted she and Ben go together to the concert they wanted so badly to see in Calgary. She had felt so moved by the total trust Wayne and Meredith had in them that she and Ben took separate hotel rooms and stayed in them all night.
Then her personal movie continued to the point where she had come to understand that it wasn’t the affair that she wanted, it was the stimulation, the rush it brought to her mundane life that appealed to her. That’s when she had decided she really wanted to fulfill her lifelong desire to see more of the world.
It had been hard telling Wayne that their marriage was over. Harder yet convincing him that it was true. She’d thought Ben would agree that their affair had run its course but he didn’t want it to end. He had been just as adamant as Wayne that she stay.
Her move into Redwater was next on the screen and followed by the phone calls she began receiving and then the visits from Wayne and Ben. The last act was that night with Ben and she saw each and every detail in full color, heard every w
ord spoken, felt every touch until the final scene of Ben’s face as he realized she’d actually stabbed him. It was what had happened after that she still couldn’t face. She couldn’t even bring herself to tell her lawyer. She couldn’t tell anyone.
And then time was set aside for the feelings of the day and any number of them would clamour for attention. She had her choice: shame, regret, sorrow, and so many more. She had screwed up her life and the lives of her husband and child. Oh, how she wished that she had never begun the affair with Ben.
She is in limbo right now with no marriage, no work. She’d told Wayne that she wanted to move to Edmonton until the trial and she would sign the farm over to him totally if he would give her some money. He’d agreed to buy her out for her share. That, at least, was a relief.
Christine was startled out of her reverie by the alarm on her clock. She reached over and shut it off. Time to make supper. She knew that if she didn’t set the alarm, she would never know how much time had passed. She climbed off the bed and headed upstairs. The house was silent but she didn’t wonder where Wayne and Graham were. She didn’t have that right anymore. She peeled and cooked the potatoes, fried the chicken, and set the table. When the food was ready and no one had shown up, she dished up a plate for herself, ate then went back downstairs. The men would reheat the meal when they got in.
* * * *
Wayne’s Story
Wayne walked up to Meredith’s house. At the door was a pile of bags and boxes and he wondered what was in them. Had Meredith cleaned out all of Ben’s things already? He knocked and heard her call. When he pushed the door open he felt a difference in the house. Although the furniture was still in the same places it seemed empty somehow. Meredith was polishing the wooden table in the dining room.
“Got a spare cup of coffee?” Wayne asked.
Meredith smiled. “You bet.” She put the spray can and cloth down and went to the kitchen to make a fresh pot of coffee while Wayne sat at the table.
“How are you doing?” he asked.
“Surviving.” Meredith put two mugs on the table. “I did a little house cleaning,” she explained.
“Yes, I saw the pile outside,” Wayne said.
“I’ve got some more to add to it then I’m going to haul them to the dump.”
“If they are Ben’s clothing and stuff why don’t you give them to the second hand store.”
“I don’t think they’d appreciate the condition they’re in.”
“Why not?”
“Well, I may have wrecked them a bit,” Meredith grinned.
“Oh, I see.” Wayne smiled back. He was glad to see her humour had returned. He just wished he could recover as quickly. But then Ben was gone and she could begin her life again, whereas he had Christine as a constant reminder. And that had been his choice although at the time he hadn’t realized how hard it would be on him.
“Where are your seedlings?” Wayne looked in the corner of the dining room. He was sure he had seen them on the day he’d come after finding out about Ben. He was surprised that he even remembered it. There were lots that he didn’t, or wouldn’t, recall.
“Well.” Meredith looked a little sheepish. “They kind of fell on the floor.”
“Your figurines are missing, too.” Wayne looked at the empty china cabinet. Meredith had been so proud of them.
“They kind of had an accident, too.”
“Sounds like a hurricane went through here.”
“I guess a Meredith betrayed is a little like a hurricane.”
They both laughed.
“Do you want to tell me about it?” Wayne asked.
Meredith got up and opened the cupboards, showing the near empty shelves. “Follow me,” she said and led him upstairs to the master bedroom. “I haven’t finished cleaning in here, yet.”
Wayne saw the shredded clothes, curtains, and sheets in a pile on the floor. “Looks like you were busy.”
“It took a while. What about you? How are you holding up?”
“It’s tougher than I thought.” Wayne followed her back to the kitchen. “Christine is polite and I’m polite and Graham is polite. We’re like three strangers not knowing what to say to each other. Christine wants me to take a mortgage on the farm and give her some money so she can move to Edmonton.”
“Not Vancouver?”
“No, she has to stay close because of the trial.”
“Are you going to?”
Wayne nodded. “I’ve been to the bank. The farm has to be appraised and then I have to prove I can pay it back with just the milk income. It will be a few weeks before the paper work is done.”
“Maybe once she’s gone you can clean house like I did. It would make you feel better, at least for awhile.”
“So it doesn’t last?”
“No. A sudden thought enters my head and I’ll feel hatred, then later another thought will make me feel love, and they keep coming until I’ve gone through most of the emotions. It can be very upsetting.”
“I know. My feelings are so mixed up that I never know what to feel. Sometimes I want so badly to get away from my thoughts.”
They drank their coffee in relaxed silence. Wayne was glad he had come over. This was what he needed. A person he was comfortable with, to whom he could talk and who understood his feelings. This was the first time in days that he had actually felt at ease. He didn’t have to be on his guard here, worried about saying or doing the wrong thing. He wondered if she would mind if he came here when his brooding threatened to overpower him.
Chapter 40
“So ... it was you who killed Ben,” Elizabeth stated, when they were settled in Meredith’s back yard the next morning.
Meredith smiled slightly at them. “Yes,” she said easily.
Just like that. Elizabeth had expected her to deny it, to say it was just a poem. “Why?”
“Why? Why?” Meredith’s voice rose as she spoke. “He was having an affair with the woman I had considered my best friend. Is that a good enough reason for you?”
“So you went there and hit her over the head then pulled the knife out of him and stabbed him again and again.”
“Yes,” she said.
“Why are you confessing now?”
She looked down at her hands in her lap. “I could say I’m dying from some terrible disease, but I’m not. I could say that I’ve found religion and need to confess my sins, but that’s not true. The simple truth is that I believe Christine has suffered for enough years.”
“Suffered, as in thinking she killed someone that she didn’t?”
“I’ll answer that by letting you read the last poem for my last book.” She picked up two pieces of paper from the patio table and handed one to each of them. Elizabeth read.
Fade In
Act One
Exterior-Back Yard-Day
A woman is on her knees pulling weeds in the garden. She stops and sits back on her heels. She looks around the yard and her shoulders slump. A tear runs down her cheek.
I work in my garden,
I clean my house, I go shopping,
but always I am alone.
Thirty years of flowers and vegetables.
My life is no life.
Your death was my death.
People ignore me like I am not there.
Even my whirlwind success as a poet
is not what I want from life.
If I had not killed you in anger
I may have taken you back
Because you were my life.
End Act One
Fade Out
Fade In
Act Two
Interior-House-Day
The woman is sitting at her desk. Her computer is on and she is typing on the keyboard. She stops and reads what she had written.
You were stabbed once by your lover.
Then once by me for the pain,
Twice by me for the faithlessness,
Three times by me for the loss of trust,
Four times by me for the loss of love.
I have often wondered, pondered
as your eyes watched me
what were your last thoughts?
Did you have any regrets about what
you had done to me, to our marriage?
Or was it Christine who occupied
those final moments of your life?
End Act Two
Fade Out
Fade In
Act Three
Interior-House-Day
The woman at the computer lifts her head and looks into the distance. She shakes it then continues typing.
Why did I keep quiet, not admit it was me?
I thought the police would discover it
but they never believed her story
that someone had hit her and they never came for me.
So I kept my secret all these years
And she kept hers, for when she fell to the floor
I heard her whisper “Graham.”
And knew she thought I was him
So you have not been protecting your son
these thirty years, Christine.
You have been protecting me.
A fitting sentence for your betrayal.
End Act three
Fade Out
Elizabeth sat and absorbed what she had just read. She’d known that Meredith had loved Ben from the other poems. This poem showed the hatred she must have felt at the moment she discovered the affair and she killed Ben in that passion. What malice she had harboured for Christine all these years.
“What are you going to do now?” Elizabeth asked.
“I’ll go to the police and tell them. I’ve just been waiting for someone to come to me and let me know they had reasoned it out. I was sure I had made it clear how much I loved Ben. I thought some reader would put that together with him having an affair, being stabbed by Christine, and then Christine claiming that she’d been hit over the head by someone who had finally killed him. Following that thread they should have suspected me. After all, isn’t it the spouse who is the first suspect?”
The Travelling Detective: Boxed Set Page 51