I wrapped my arm around her and murmured soft shushes and rocked us in the swing, trying to think of the answer she needed to hear. After a few minutes, I decided to get real.
“Listen, either way, somebody loses something. Meagan loves you. She’s willing to pledge her life with yours. Are you certain about this relationship? The only way you’d be taking advantage of her is if you’re not sure. Do you love her?”
Ari raised her head and dashed away her tears. “Yes.”
“Do you love her enough that you know this is right? Nobody can ever be 100 percent sure, but are you certain you want to marry her?”
Ari bit her lip, then nodded. “Yes. I do.”
“Then you need to trust her when she says this is what she wants. You need to believe in her as much as she believes in you. Meagan is willing to go all in, in a big way. If your feelings are as strong as hers, then her family is the ultimate loser, because they refuse to accept her as she is.” I turned to face Ari. “So, can you do this? Can you be as brave as she is? Because ultimately, you’re just worried about disappointing her. This is your fear of commitment coming through.”
Ari stared at me for a moment, then she wiped her eyes. “I thought I’d gotten over that,” she said. “But you’re right. I’m afraid that if I go through with the wedding, and later on something happens between us, I’ll be the villain.” She sighed, staring at her hands. “How do you know when it’s right?”
“How do you know when anything’s right? You trust your heart and hope. There’s never going to be a guarantee. There’s no money back if you’re not satisfied.” I squeezed her hand. “The question is, do you trust your feelings enough to make this happen?”
She stared at the street, then finally nodded. “I’m tired of being afraid. When everything seemed fine, it was much easier. But now, it requires sacrifice and work, it’s not just ‘Let’s play dress up and get married.’ I guess I should talk to Meagan. I need to tell her why I’ve been dragging my feet. She deserves to know.”
The door opened before I could reply and Millie, along with the ME, came out. He headed down the steps and out to her car, while she stopped to chat.
“We’re pretty certain the DNA from the blood and hair on the stairs will match the DNA we found on the clothing. Did I tell you we found bloodstains on the collar of his shirt? That would track with him hitting the back of his head on the steps. Your grandmother’s waiting for you. By the way, until this all started, I had no clue that you were related to Rowan.”
“I didn’t either, not until a few months ago,” I said.
Millie flashed a smile at Ari, who was looking mildly confused, then headed down the stairs after Dr. Bones.
“What’s going on? Bloodstains? Stairs? What on earth’s going on? I knew you were having problems but…” Ari glanced through the living room window.
“Yeah, it’s gotten complicated. You remember I mentioned the walled-up storage room in my text?”
“Vaguely, yeah.”
“Turns out that there’s an entrance to a hidden basement in the storeroom. We went down there today and found a huge mural that’s connected with the Covenant of Chaos. It was probably down there when my parents first bought the house. They bought it after the bank foreclosed, you know, so they didn’t get a chance to talk to the original owners.”
As we headed inside, I finished catching her up on what had gone on.
“Good grief, I leave you alone for a week and look what happens.” Ari snorted.
Rowan and Teran were waiting inside with the others. They were sitting around the dining room table. Rowan motioned for us to join them.
“So, I called the other members of the Crystal Cauldron. They’re coming over here at midnight and we’re going to close that damned portal and get rid of it for good. You’re staying to help, you and Teran.” She looked at Ari. “You, too. Your mother was part of the Cauldron before she moved away.”
Ari blinked. “What are you getting me into?”
“Hush, girl. Hank has been digging for information for the past half hour and he’s come up with some interesting tidbits.” Rowan nodded to Hank and he turned to me.
“January, it turns out that when your parents first bought the house, they registered complaints of several attempted break-ins. Then the complaints abruptly stopped, shortly after you were born. The cops caught one of the intruders, and it was none other than Charge’s uncle. The one who helped found Stellarview.”
He held up his hand before I could ask any questions. “The mural down in your basement is a replica of one in Germany that was painted around the turn of the nineteenth century. It was discovered in the basement of a house on the edge of the Black Forest. Hans Grier—the artist who owned that house and painted the mural—was a well-known chaos magician. The Court Magika ordered the painting photographed, and then destroyed.”
“Wait,” I said. “The Court Magika is worldwide?”
“Yes, I told you about Queen Heliesa. She rules over our supreme court, and then lesser courts have some degree of autonomy and are spread all over the world. It’s similar to the Crystal Cauldron—we’re the local arm of the Order of the Moon—a worldwide organization that seeks to counter the destruction caused by the Covenant of Chaos.” Rowan paused.
I digested the information. So Queen Heliesa was truly the Queen of the witchblood.
I frowned, mulling over the information she had just deluged me with. “So, what connection exists between the Order of the Moon and the Court Magika?”
“The Order of the Moon is a worldwide magical military branch of the Court Magika, if you want to get technical. We keep the peace. There are other branches around. There’s one in Whisper Hollow, though they’re much more undercover.” Rowan shrugged. “This is all information every member of the witchblood lineage should know. I’m so irritated with your parents for never telling you.”
Teran cleared her throat. “Honestly, so am I. I tried to talk to my sister about it but she wouldn’t listen and it wasn’t my place to interfere.”
I nodded, glancing at Ari. “Did you know all of this?”
“Some of it,” Ari said. “But my parents were focused on other things.”
“Your mother was a part of the Crystal Cauldron,” Rowan said. “But she had a falling out with a couple of the members. That’s partially why they moved away.”
Ari stiffened. “I never knew any of this.”
Rowan sighed. “We’ll have a long sorting-out discussion soon, but right now, let’s focus on the matter at hand. So, Hank found out that Charge’s uncle—Tobias Perry—was originally based in Germany and he had a connection to Hans Grier, who sent him the blueprints for the mural. Tobias and his cronies recreated it here. They didn’t count on Lilian and Gaynor going bankrupt and losing the house. As to where the pair disappeared to, that’s anybody’s guess.”
“So this was probably one of the headquarters for the Covenant of Chaos before the bank foreclosed on it and my parents bought it,” I said.
At that moment the doorbell rang. It was another set of cops, here to take the motorcycle into custody. As they carted the thing up the steps and out through the living room, I felt a sense of relief. When they left, I closed the door behind them.
“So if we seal the portal, do you think the house will go back to normal?” I asked.
Rowan nodded. “Yes. Why your mother didn’t come to me, I don’t know, but…”
“I know why,” Teran said. “I feel awkward even bringing it up, but…”
“Why? You can be blunt,” Rowan said.
“She was terrified you’d pull her into the Crystal Cauldron like you did me. Althea was focused on her home and family. She wanted to be Samantha, from Bewitched, and Trevor didn’t discourage her. While Althea was a powerful witch, she was afraid of her own abilities.” Teran shrugged. “You can understand her reluctance to call you in on the case.”
Rowan frowned, but there wasn’t much she could say to that. “
I can see her reasoning. But by leaving the mural down there, even though she warded it off, she caused a great deal of harm to the community.” She rapped her knuckles on the table. “First, the three of you—” she pointed to Hank, Caitlin, and Tad—“are to remain quiet about all of this. No divulging information without my permission. Understand?”
She gave them such a ferocious look, they all quickly agreed.
“All right. Now, everyone, listen to me about this. As I said, the Covenant of Chaos shows signs that it’s regrouping. We have to be on our guard. They may not target the town directly, but they will do what they can to use the ley lines Moonshadow Bay is built on.”
“So that’s why they’re making a hold in Moonshadow Bay?” I asked. “Because of the ley lines?”
Rowan nodded. “Moonshadow Bay, Whisper Hollow, Terameth Lake—they’re all powerful towns on this side of the Cascades that are on a series of incredibly active ley lines.”
“Where’s Terameth Lake? I’ve never heard of it,” I said.
“It’s out near Mount Rainier,” Rowan answered. “There are usually three to seven little towns in each state that rest on powerful ley lines and they tend to become havens for witchblood, spirit shamans, and the like. Shifters spread into the cities more, but they’re not usually connected with the chaos magicians, either.”
“Okay. So what do we do next?”
Rowan glanced at her watch. “You go home, all of you. January, I suggest you go back to Killian’s house. I’ll return to my house and prepare for the ritual tonight. January, you, Teran, and Ari meet me here shortly before midnight.”
I turned to Tad, who had been sitting quietly, watching the conversation. “Too bad you can’t come and watch—”
“Oh no,” Rowan said. “Not allowed.”
Tad laughed. “I wouldn’t even try, though it would be interesting. I’ll see you at work tomorrow, January. We need to figure out how to trap the Whatcom Devil and dispatch it.”
As we headed out, I stopped at the edge of the drive to talk to Ari. “Are you feeling okay now?”
She nodded. “I’m going to tell Meagan that the wedding is on. I guess I’ll see you tonight—though I have no idea why I’m supposed to be there. But when Rowan barks, you jump.”
That was right, I thought. My grandmother was a bulldozer when she wanted to be. And nothing stood in her way.
Killian arrived home while I was sitting on the floor, playing with the cats. I had ordered pizza and it was on the kitchen counter.
“So, how did all the investigating go today?”
“We learned a lot,” I said. “Namely that the Covenant of Chaos was headquartered in my house before I was born, and they left a hefty piece of baggage down in the basement. But…” I hesitated, then blurted out, “Apparently my grandmother has decided that Ari, Teran, and I are joining the Crystal Cauldron. We’re taking part in a ritual tonight that should weed out the dangerous energies over there, and cleanse the house and basement. I’m not sure what the hell to do with it, though. I hate basements.”
“We can fill it in,” Killian said. “Or seal it shut.”
“I hate the thought of that empty space down there. Things grow in the dark.”
“What about renovating it so that it’s nice, bright, and actually use it for storage?” He shrugged. “You can reno it, build a proper stairwell, open it up? And then you turn the actual storage room into a proper utility room.”
He stretched out next to me and I leaned back against him as he folded an arm around my shoulders. Xi and Klaus came running over and crawled on top of us.
I nodded. “That might work.” I paused, then decided to take a tentative step into a conversation likely to be laden with land mines. “Killian, we’ve never talked about kids before. Do you want children?”
He fell silent, staring at the floor. Finally, he said, “I’m not particularly parent material. I’m sorry, but I like my life the way it is. The animals I treat—I consider them more my children. That’s one of the problems I’ve had when I’ve dated. I guess I should have told you before this, but honestly, I was afraid you’d walk away. The truth is, I don’t want to be a father.” He bit his lip, barely glancing at me.
I let out a huge breath, relief flooding through me. “Oh, thank gods!”
“What?” His eyes sparked and he straightened. “You’re not mad?”
“Mad? Far from it—I’m relieved. I was so afraid you were going to say that you wanted a family—”
“I do want a family, but kids don’t have to be part of that equation,” he said, kissing my forehead. “You’re not disappointed, then?”
I gave him a huge squeeze. “Not at all. I’ve never been cut out for parenthood and I knew it. That hasn’t changed since I met you, and it’s not likely to.”
“Then we’re good on that count,” he said, giving me a lusty wink. “What do you think about a little post-dinner tumble?”
I wanted to. Every time he kissed me, it sent goose bumps all over my body and woke up every part of me. But with the coven meeting tonight, I’d need all my energy and there wasn’t a great deal of it left, given how tired I was from the day.
“I’d love to, but Rowan has plans that I need to take part in at midnight, so I’m afraid we’ll have to wait. Let’s eat, and then we can chill by the fireplace, and play with the cats, or watch TV or whatever.” I rolled him onto his back and straddled him. For so long I’d been afraid to take the top position because I kept thinking about whether I had a double chin, or the rolls on my belly, or that I’d be too heavy. But Killian had never once commented on my looks except to tell me I was beautiful, inside and out, and so I was taking chances—pushing myself further.
As we kissed, my self-confidence grew, and my joy over finding we were on the same page about kids made every kiss that much sweeter.
Chapter Fourteen
Ari dropped back over to Killian’s at eight.
“There’s some leftover pizza if you want,” I said, leading her into the dining room.
“Thanks, that sounds good. I haven’t had dinner,” she said, then gave me a dazzling smile. “I went home and Meagan and I talked, and I told her my fears. She wants to marry me, she trusts me, and I realized how much I don’t want to let her go. In another surprise—a good one—today she received the official authorization separating her from her family. Now her mother can’t do anything to me without me being able to sue her ass off. We’re going to get married at the courthouse next week and then hold a potluck reception. We have our outfits, we have all the friends we need for a party…”
“You still want to hold the reception in my yard?” I asked, delighted to hear the news.
“No, now that we’re into the autumn, the rains could be tricky,” she said, wandering through the large hallway that Killian had covered with pictures of dogs, cats, and his family. There was one of us there, too—him and me when we had made a trip over to Port Townsend for the weekend.
“We’re renting Dynasty Hall,” she continued. “It’s big enough for dancing but still has an intimate feel to it. Thank you,” she said. “Thank you for making me see that I was just psyching myself out. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I really am ready to settle down.”
I gave her a tight squeeze. Ari had always longed to wear the white wedding dress, and I remembered her crying her eyes out when she thought she’d never be able to get married because she was gay. But now, she was parading the Love Is Love movement into the spotlight and making it shine for her and Meagan.
“What do you think Rowan will have us do?” she asked, changing the subject.
“I have no clue. Half the time, I’m scared to hear what Rowan’s thinking. And she’s my grandmother. Oh—speaking of grandmothers,” I added, dragging her into the kitchen where my purse was. “Look what I got today!” I pulled out the mail that I’d picked up before crossing the drive to Killian’s house. There was a package about three inches wide by ten inches long, from Irelan
d. “Something from Grandma Naomi.”
I paused as the doorbell rang. A moment later, Killian returned with Teran in tow. She gave me a kiss on the cheek.
“Hello, chickadee, how are you?” My aunt set a pie box down on the table. I could smell the apples and cinnamon wafting from it.
“Yum—that smells good. And look!” I held out the box, showing her the return address.
“My mother sent you something? What is it?” Teran shook her head. “Naomi barely remembers to call me. She was never particularly affectionate. She wasn’t neglectful, but I’m surprised Althea and I didn’t have a nanny. As it is, we always referred to our parents by their first names.”
I sat down and placed the box on the coffee table. “I haven’t heard from her in several years.” I opened the box and inside found yet another box—it looked like a velvet ring box—and a letter. The letter was two thin sheets of crinkly paper. Grandma Naomi had a neat hand, and her writing was precise and clear, if a bit spidery. The velvet box had a sticky note on it that read, “Open me after you read the letter.”
“Read it,” Ari said. “I don’t think I ever met your grandmother Naomi.”
“She lives in Scotland, right?” Killian asked.
“No, she’s in Ireland.” I shrugged. “Let’s see…” I began to read aloud.
Dear January:
Your email arrived the other day, and yes, that is still my email address. I’m answering you via the post because I’m sending you something. But first, before I tell you what it is, I’d love for you to come visit me sometime in the next year or so. I don’t know how long I have left—I’m definitely getting up there and have only my witchblood to thank for it. I’d like to see my granddaughter once again. Please give Teran my love, as well, and tell her to write her mother now and then.
I’m not a good correspondent, and for that I apologize, but it’s just not something I do. But I found the enclosed the other day and I have decided it’s time to give it to you. I was going to send it to your mother to give to you, but one thing after another happened and I forgot I hadn’t done so. Better late than never. I hope you like it. It belonged to your great-grandmother Colleen. May you wear it well. Don’t sell it or pawn it—it belongs in the family. Much love, your Gramony.
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