“What are you doing?” Michael asked her.
“Just . . . looking around,” Lennie said. “Hey, do you have any idea what you’re going to be doing today?”
“Nope!” Michael said with a smile. “But I’m still gonna crush it.”
She sighed. I could have crushed it, too. If I were allowed.
No . . . she couldn’t get negative. There was hope now! There was Uncle Humphrey and his special, top secret training method. And there was the plan to destroy Wizardmatch. She’d prove them all wrong.
The rest of the missing Pomporromps arrived, followed by Estella, Sir Fluffington the Fourth, and last of all, Poppop.
“HEAR YE! HEAR YE!” Poppop Pomporromp shouted. “And welcome to the first real test of Wizardmatch. This is the first time we will be doing eliminations. Let me reintroduce you to my fellow judges. Here we have Sir Fluffington the Fourth, the noblest guard cat I have ever known. And on my right is Estella Jane Wixson, the best human anyone could find.”
Estella looked both surprised and touched at Poppop’s words.
“Feast your eyes on my pudding pool! Delicious chocolate—I pride myself in it. Actually, I bathe myself in it, but that is neither here nor there.” He cleared his throat. “What I want you to look at . . . are the diving boards.”
Lennie did look. There were two diving boards—a low dive and a high dive—facing the pool. But then Poppop raised his magic staff, gave it a flick, and suddenly the diving boards popped out of the ground, like weeds being plucked. They floated across the pudding pool and then cemented themselves on the other side, facing out over the cliff. To jump off them now would be to dive hundreds of feet into the rough, black ocean.
Anya began jogging in place. Her curls bounced up and down around her workout headband. “Whatever the test is, I’m going to WIN! I’m captain of the swim team at school—and I have fifteen swim trophies!”
“You got this, Anya!” her dad said as he massaged her shoulders.
Perrie raised her hand, like they were all in a classroom. “Are we going to jump off the cliff?” her tiny cousin squeaked. “That’s a deadly drop!”
“DEADLY INDEED!” Poppop said, glancing furtively at Estella. He coughed. “Are you feeling ill, Estella? I was very sure you were going to interrupt me or scold me or—”
“I thought I’d let you be dramatic today, Mortimer.”
“You’re the best best BEST!” Poppop squealed, clapping his hands together. “Okay, back to the test,” he said, sounding giddy. “The dangerous test! At the bottom of the ocean, I’ve hidden a few items of mine. But be careful: there’s a three-headed shark guarding all of my possessions.”
“A three-headed shark?!” Michael said. “That is AWESOME!”
“Yes, I created it!” Poppop said proudly. “‘What’s the one thing that’s scarier than a one-headed shark?’ I said to myself. A two-headed shark. And then I thought, what’s scarier than a two-headed shark? A three-headed shark!”
“What about four-headed shark?” Julien asked.
Poppop’s jaw dropped. “Four heads?! Why didn’t I think of that? INGENIUS! Anyway, all you have to do is bring back any item, and you will pass. Let me stress this again: the only rule is that you must retrieve one of my items from the ocean. This will test your COURAGE. Your BRAVERY. Your METTLE. Your NERVE. Your VALOR. Your PLUCK—”
“Someone ate a thesaurus for breakfast,” Ethan whispered.
Poppop leered at him. “It seems,” he said, smacking his lips, “that we have a volunteer to go first.”
Ethan’s freckled face turned bright red—Lennie was sure he regretted speaking up. But he moved to the low dive nevertheless.
“One last thing,” Poppop said. “You have only one minute to accomplish your task. When time is up, I will pull you back, whether or not you have anything in your hands. Try to get back on your own, as I will deduct points if I have to do it. Three, two, one, GO!”
Ethan got to work right away, growing his hair. And growing. And growing. It extended past his shoulders, past his butt, past his feet. Then Ethan wrapped the ends of his hair around the diving board, tied a tight knot, and began to rappel down the side of the cliff, using his hair as rope.
Lennie and the entire Pomporromp family raced to the edge of the cliff, peering over to watch as Ethan descended into the ocean. And then he was gone.
Suddenly Ethan popped out of the water, and his hair began to slurp back into his scalp, pulling him up, up, up the cliff face. When he reached the diving board, he pulled himself up with one hand and held out the other to Poppop.
“Here,” he said, handing Poppop something pink and soggy, “I believe these are your slippers.”
Poppop clapped his hands together and laughed in delight. “Well done! That wasn’t so bad, was it?”
“That water,” Ethan said with a shiver. “It was cold and dark . . . like my soul.”
“Indeed,” Poppop said. “Next, we shall have . . . VICTORIA!”
Poppop waved his staff and levitated the baby right out of Aunt Macy’s hands. Victoria soared to the diving board. She landed on her side and began to roll off; she plummeted to the depths of the ocean.
“MY BABY!” Aunt Macy shrieked. “PULL HER BACK UP!”
“Let’s not ruin her chance,” Poppop said. “Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater.”
“BUT SHE CAN’T SWIM!”
“She can float.”
“BUT THERE’S A THREE-HEADED SHARK!”
“A little shark bite never did anyone any harm! Well, except Sir Fluffington the Second, may he rest in peace.”
Fluffles stiffened and backed away from the cliff’s edge. “I thought Sir Fluffington the Second left to join the circus! You said he departed because he was forever in jest!”
“Yes, he departed because he was forever ingested.”
The clock ticked on, and the waiting seemed endless.
“Time!” Poppop said, waving his staff. Victoria flew out from the water, and she appeared unharmed. She hiccupped as she sucked on a key ring. Lennie’s eyebrows shot up. The baby actually found something!
“Beginner’s luck,” grumbled Uncle Philip #3.
“Of course she went for the shiniest object,” Aunt Lacey muttered.
“You found my keys!” Poppop said. “And next up . . . Ellington!”
Ellington flounced her giant dress and curled a lock of her hair around her finger. She scrunched her face and leaned over. Something dark and brown rose out of the seawater: an old boot. It levitated upward, Ellington coaxing it up the cliff. But then, the boot quivered.
“OH!” Ellington said as her knees buckled beneath her and she swooned. The boot fell back to the ocean with a plunk! “The effort was just too much for me! I am too weak!”
She was not too weak. Lennie had seen her lift much heavier objects from much farther away for a much longer time. Lennie knew Ellington didn’t want to be Prime Wizard, but it just felt like her cousin was spitting all over her dreams.
“Mmmm,” Poppop said, frowning. All three judges were writing on their clipboards. “Well, thank you for trying. Now . . . Julien.”
Lennie tried to hide her pout. She’d been hoping Julien would go last, so she could sabotage him.
He smiled, looked around—and Ellington came walking back to the cliff with a blank stare on her face. She clambered onto the diving board and leaned over the edge.
What is she doing? Lennie thought. It’s Julien’s turn!
Suddenly, a stuffed animal came flying out of the sea, straight into Ellington’s arms. With a slack look on her face, she handed her prize to Julien. Lennie had never seen her cousin’s eyes so dull or lifeless.
Mind control, Lennie realized, smacking her head. Julien has mind control as a power. She felt stupid for not figuring it out earlier.
“Fantastic display, Julien!” Poppop said with a wink. “Now . . . Bo!”
With every name that wasn’t Michael, Lennie’s stomach wrenched. What if her brother was the last contestant, and she had to destroy his chances? Could she do it? Would she?
As Poppop started the timer, Bo hopped right into the pool and spooned fistfuls of pudding into his mouth. He ate and he ate and he ate, faster than seemed humanly possible. Then Bo coughed up an enormous white bird as big as he was. He moved closer to the bird to hop on its back, but the bird kept trying to bite his fingers. They danced around each other in a wild goose chase.
“TIME!” Poppop called out. “You . . . you didn’t even get down to the ocean!”
“I am afraid I cannot control the birds,” Bo said breathily. “I only bring them to life, and that is the greatest power of all.”
“The greatest power of all is love,” said his sister Danielle.
“Peace, love, and spontaneously generating waterfowl,” Bo agreed.
“The judges will deliberate on your effort,” Poppop said. “Next up . . .”
Michael, Michael, Michael! Lennie chanted in her head.
“Perrie!”
Perrie ran up to the diving board, nervously running a hand through her short purple hair. But she had no reason to be nervous. She used her extendable arms to reach down into the water. With one hand, she restrained the three-headed shark. And with the other hand, she fished for an item: Poppop’s spare dentures. She finished the task in a matter of seconds, and it was the best performance Lennie had seen yet.
“Very efficient!” Poppop said. “We have now come to our penultimate contestant.”
Lennie suddenly felt feverishly ill. Next was either her brother, Michael, or her cousin Anya. And whoever wasn’t called, she’d have to destroy. “Next up is . . .”
Lennie closed her eyes.
“Michael!”
As Michael took his place on the diving board, she let out a sigh of relief. He looked so small up there. Lennie wished she’d meant it more when she wished him luck earlier.
“And your time starts . . . NOW!” Poppop said.
But Michael didn’t move off the diving board.
“Your time is going,” Poppop said, annoyed.
“I know,” Michael said.
Most of the Pomporromps began murmuring to one another, but Lennie knew exactly what Michael was doing. His power only lasted for thirteen seconds. If he didn’t wait until the last seconds to dive in, he’d be stuck in the ocean with the shark, totally visible, until Poppop could pull him up.
And sure enough, with seventeen seconds to go, Michael shouted, “SHARK ATTAAAAAAAAAAAACK!” and cannonballed hundreds of feet into the ocean. When the clock reached zero, Poppop pulled him back, and Michael proudly handed him a waterlogged book.
“I had my doubts,” Poppop said with a smile. “But clearly you wanted to wait to the last moment to be dramatic. My, my—you might be the Pomporromp who is most like myself!”
Lennie’s face twitched in rage.
“And the last champion . . . Anya!” Poppop said.
Lennie swallowed down her anger and wiped her sweaty palms on her shorts. Now was her time!
“Three, two, one . . . GO!” Poppop shouted, and Anya dove headfirst into the water, before Lennie could even think of a way to stop her.
What do I do?! Lennie rushed over to the edge of the cliff. There was no way Lennie could dive in after Anya without getting caught.
Lennie watched her cousin freeze the three-headed shark in place and dive into the deep for one of Poppop’s belongings. And when the shark unfroze, Anya hopped onto its back and rode it—holding on to its fin tightly, even while it tried to buck her off. The whole family oooohed and ahhhhed at her daring performance.
With only ten seconds left to Anya’s test, Lennie began to panic. She scrambled away from the edge of the cliff. How was she going to sabotage her cousin?
Five seconds left.
Lennie invisibled.
Three. Two. One.
Poppop waved his staff, and Anya appeared just a few feet from Lennie, holding a toothbrush.
I have to get it from her! Lennie thought, racing closer.
She was right in front of Anya now. Her cousin looked so elated—her grin was wide and her dimple was deep, and Lennie felt sick. But she had to do this—it was the only way to convince Uncle Humphrey she was serious.
She reached an invisible hand forward, slid the toothbrush out of Anya’s grip, and chucked it over the cliff. Anya was so busy making triumphant muscle poses that she didn’t even notice.
“I WIN!” she gloated. “I’m the BEST, and don’t you forget it! I always win!”
“Actually, you FAILED!” Poppop said.
“WHAT?” she choked. She stared at her hand, then scoured the ground. “But I had your toothbrush! I did! I swear!”
“Well, where is it, then?”
Still shaking from nerves, Lennie went visible behind the crowd and held her breath. None of the cousins noticed her. Not a single aunt or uncle blinked her way. Her mom and brother didn’t even sniff in her direction.
But the cat.
Fluffles was staring right at her, his yellow eyes like two burning suns. Her chest tightened.
He doesn’t know anything, Lennie told herself. You’re just nervous.
She moved behind the crowd until Fluffles couldn’t see her anymore.
Poppop clapped his hands together. “And now, Estella, Sir Flufflington the Fourth, and I will deliberate. When we return, we shall announce who won and who is eliminated!”
Poppop, Estella, and Fluffles formed a small circle and began whispering together. Everyone started mingling, and Lennie wove her way to the edge of the crowd, looking toward the borderlands for Uncle Humphrey. Was he watching? Was he impressed?
Someone tapped her on the shoulder, and she whipped around.
“What are you looking at?” Michael asked.
“Nothing,” she said defensively.
“Did you see me? Did you?! What’d you think?”
“You know you did great!” Lennie snapped. “You don’t need me to tell you!”
And she stormed off, leaving Michael looking hurt and confused. That wasn’t right, her gut told her. But she just couldn’t get herself to apologize.
“HEAR YE HEAR YE!” Poppop said. “We are ready to start our eliminations!”
Everyone hushed.
“The first name I call is the best performer in this test. Drumroll, please!”
All the Pomporromps stomped their feet—
“JULIEN. Everyone give Julien a hand.”
Julien’s dad applauded wildly, but everyone else did a respectfully quiet clap. Lennie folded her arms—it was Ellington who did all of the work during Julien’s trial.
“You are still in the running to become the next Prime Wizard.” Poppop smiled. “In a close second, we have Ethan. Congratulations! Things are looking up for you!”
“For now,” Ethan said gloomily. “But I’m sure things will suck again soon.”
“Third, we have Michael, and fourth we have Bo. Congratulations! You two are both still in the running to become the next Prime Wizard! Now, there is only one spot left and four contestants remaining. Anya, Ellington, Perrie, Victoria. Who will it be?” Poppop paused. His mouth curled into a grin, and he was clearly enjoying the tension he was creating. “The last spot . . . in the first test of Wizardmatch . . . goes to . . .”
Perrie, Lennie thought. It had to be Perrie. She retrieved her object effortlessly! She was talented and smart and—
“Victoria!” Poppop said.
“WHAT?!” Uncle Bob said.
“THE BABY?” Uncle Philip #2 cried. “HER?!”
“She gave us a very dramatic moment,” Poppop said. “Extr
a points for dramatic moments!”
The rest of the family clapped halfheartedly.
“I’m sorry,” Poppop continued. “That means Anya, Perrie, and Ellington, you are eliminated.”
Anya threw her sweatband off her head and stamped it in the ground, screaming until her cheeks were bright red.
Lennie bit her lips to keep from reacting. But inside, she was roaring with pride. After years of hearing Anya brag about all her successes and seeing all her trophies and feeling all the stress of Thanksgiving board games getting flipped across the room whenever Anya wasn’t winning . . . finally Lennie put her cousin in her place.
Ellington, meanwhile, tore the ribbons out of her hair and used them like confetti.
Perrie frowned. “But I did so well!” she said disbelievingly.
Lennie couldn’t help but agree—Perrie crushed it, yet Bo, who hadn’t even completed the task, got to continue on in the competition. And—even though Lennie was glad she lost—Anya was the only one brave enough to ride on the back of a three-headed shark. Didn’t Poppop say he was looking for adventurous and daring traits in this test?
The field cleared out, but Lennie lingered behind, hoping Great-Uncle Humphrey would make an appearance once everyone had left. But after an hour of picking weeds and aimlessly roaming around the grounds, she finally gave up. Hopefully he’d been watching, and hopefully she’d passed his test, and hopefully she’d find out soon.
Consequences
The cat cornered Lennie on the way up to her room.
“BOO!” Fluffles said, blocking her skateboard’s path.
She skidded to a stop. They were on the twenty-fifth floor, just above the overzealous, book-pelting library.
“A word please?” the cat asked.
Lennie’s stomach sank.
“This way,” Fluffles said, leading her down a long hall. There were mostly guest rooms on this floor: Vegetable Villa, Quesadilla Quarters, and Bacon Boudoir. Lennie couldn’t help but notice that not a single one of the guest rooms featured Filipino food.
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