“NO!” their mom roared, and she grabbed Lennie and dragged her away from Michael.
Lennie was panting and sweating, her heart beating a million miles a minute. She wanted nothing more than to smack Michael again. Her arm was throbbing, and when she looked down, she saw the outline of his fingers. He left his mark, and she—apparently—had left a few scratches on him.
“I’m never going to talk to you AGAIN!” Michael shouted.
“GOOD because I’m never talking to you, either!” Lennie replied.
“I won’t talk to you for longer!”
Her throat was sore. Her pulse was hammering in her ears.
“Get off of me,” Lennie said to her mom.
She wanted her mom to say no—to hold her tight, to dry her tears, to make everything all better.
But her mom let go, and Lennie left.
* * *
Lennie weaved through the castle, flickering invisible whenever she neared any of her extended family. After what she’d done, it would be risky to move about the castle and leave the grounds, but Lennie needed to see her great-uncle right away. He would know how to make her feel better. He would fix everything. They would come up with a new plan to destroy stupid Wizardmatch, and everything would be okay again.
Her arm was still smarting from where Michael had grabbed it; she cradled her arm to her body and gently rubbed it with her other hand.
“It’s all RUINED!” came Poppop’s voice.
Lennie’s heart caught in her chest; she pulled herself to the side of the ramp and invisibled just in time as Poppop and Estella skateboarded past.
“Sir Fluffington the Fourth, missing! And my dear Julien is in a coma! And Lennie is plotting behind everyone’s backs! It’s all too much, Estella!” Poppop sniffled, before circling out of Lennie’s earshot.
As Lennie tiptoed around the Jelly Floor, avoiding the bits of jelly that had stretched onto the ramp, she thought about how she and Michael used to be like peanut butter and jelly, like French fries and ketchup, like pretzels and ice cream—they just meshed together, the perfect combo. Siblings who were also best friends.
Would she ever have that with Michael after this competition was over?
For the first time since arriving in Netherly, she wanted to go home. Not just back to San Francisco, but back to school and her friends and her church and the pretty good life she had before Wizardmatch screwed everything up.
At last, she was out of the castle, undetected. Outside, the sun had just set. Early evening shadows cloaked her as she made her way to her uncle’s cave in the borderlands. When she reached the clearing, she knocked on the big boulder like she always did. But instead of opening up for her, it stayed closed.
“Uncle Humphrey! Let me in!” She knocked again. “I have food for Fluffles!”
“It’s not going to open,” Uncle Humphrey said from behind her.
She pivoted around. His eyebrows converged together, his forehead was all scrunched, and his mouth was twisted into a scowl.
“Are you mad at me?” Lennie asked.
“You dropped my hand today! You almost got me caught!” he said angrily. “You abandoned me in the middle of our mission!”
Her stomach dropped. “I—I’m sorry,” she said. “I thought—”
“No, you didn’t think. That was the problem.”
Lennie took a small step toward her great-uncle, but his nostrils flared dangerously.
“I told you we needed the staff. I told you we couldn’t stop Wizardmatch unless we had the staff. I told you our objective was the staff.” Uncle Humphrey’s nostrils flared. “We were SO CLOSE to the staff, and you just blew it! All because you couldn’t let your brother faint.”
“I know, I’m . . . I’m sorry,” Lennie whispered. “I just couldn’t help it.”
“I’ll just have to try again,” Humphrey muttered to himself.
“Yes! We can—”
“We?” Humphrey said. “No, no, no, my dear. Just me. You’re done.”
“Done?”
“Through! Finished! Kaput! Outta here!”
She blinked. For a second, she’d thought he might be joking, but his mouth was puckered, and he glared at her with loathing. It wasn’t a kidding face. “You can’t—”
“Oh, believe me, I can,” Uncle Humphrey said, his mouth twitching. “You’ve almost cost me everything, and if you’re going to be a liability, I can no longer afford to mentor you. Go away, Lennie,” he said in disgust.
Lennie couldn’t stop the tears now—she threw the bag full of food for Fluffles at Uncle Humphrey and sprinted back to the castle, her face dripping. The fury in his expression, the disappointment in his eyes . . . it was too much to bear. It was the same look she got from her brother, her mom, her poppop.
She let herself into the castle and slumped against the door. Her whole body felt heavy; her heart ached. All the fight seemed to leave her in one breath. She was just so tired. If she weren’t positive that a search party would come after her, she would have skipped dinner and gone right to bed. She felt like she could sleep for days. Or years.
She wiped her eyes with her sleeves and shuffled toward the bottom of the ramp. A skateboard ushered her to the dining hall. Her head hung low as she lumbered inside. No one talked to her or acknowledged her or even glanced in her direction.
Except Ellington, who cornered her while she was getting her food.
“A-are you mad at me?” Ellington said timidly. Her eyes filled with tears, which began to escape down her cheeks. “You are ignoring me, aren’t you? I thought it was in my head, but then every time I try to talk to you . . .”
“Of course I’m ignoring you!”
“Well, why?” Ellington said.
Lennie simply folded her arms.
“I’m mad at you, too,” Ellington said so softly that Lennie could barely hear her over all the noise in the dining hall. “You’ve been so mean to me for no reason at all. It’s not fair.”
Lennie scoffed. “Fair?! Don’t talk to me about fair!”
“You’re not mad at me; you’re mad at your mom. If you and your mom just apologi—”
“NEVER!” Lennie fumed, grabbing a seat in the far corner of the kids’ table and moving it even farther away.
Ellington really thought two little words could solve all her problems? An apology wasn’t big enough for the hurt she was feeling.
“ATTENTION, ATTENTION!” Poppop Pomporromp said, standing up on his chair and waving his hands. “The judges have deliberated! And we are pleased to announce the three children who will be moving on to the finale. Congratulations . . . Michael! You are still in the running to become the next Pomporromp Prime Wizard.”
Lennie sunk even further in her chair, while Michael spit his water across the table. “Really?!” he said.
“Really,” Poppop answered. “The next person who is still in the running is . . . Victoria! Well done, Victoria.”
“Victoria?” Anya’s dad, Uncle Philip #2, said. “Are you kidding? She sat there like a lump!”
“DON’T QUESTION MY AUTHORITY!”
“He’s easy on judging Victoria since she’s a baby. I wish I was a baby,” Anya muttered.
There was one spot left, and three people Poppop still hadn’t called: Ethan, Bo, and Julien. Ethan stared hungrily at Poppop, and Bo kept his head down.
“And the final person who will be competing in the last round of Wizardmatch is . . . Julien! I’m sorry, but that means Ethan and Bo, you are eliminated.”
Bo stuffed a scoopful of potato chowder into his mouth and coughed up a swan. “My swan song!” he cried.
“Are you kidding me?!” said Ethan’s dad, Uncle Philip #1.
“Julien is unconscious!” said Bo’s mom, Aunt Lacey. “He got ghouled! He failed the test!”
“Shut up, both
of you!” Julien’s dad snapped.
“Make me!” Uncle Philip #1 retorted, and suddenly he slapped his own cheek.
“Stop hitting yourself,” Uncle Philip #3 jeered, using his mind control to make Uncle Philip #1 continually smack himself in the face. “Stop hitting yourself! Stop hitting yourself!”
Uncle Philip #1 grew his hair out, long and pointy, like a spear—but just as he was tilting his head in the right angle, Uncle Bob sliced his hair off with a steak knife. “THAT’S FOR WHAT YOU SAID ABOUT PERRIE!”
“DON’T YOU TOUCH MY DAD!” Ethan shouted, growing his hair.
Perrie grabbed Ethan with her long, noodly arms. “Don’t you touch my daddy, you hair ball!” she said, dangling him up high.
“LET GO!” Emma said, using her hair to pelt potatoes in Perrie’s face—only she missed and hit Danielle instead.
Then Michael went invisible, and food from his plate started flying everywhere: bananas, apricots, peach slices, mashed yams. Uncle Philip #1 tied Uncle Philip #2 up in his chair. Mollie hid under the table with Raina, who was using her powers to make food fly away from them both. Bo was coughing up hawks, falcons, and eagles, which circled menacingly around the ceiling. Victoria was shrieking so loudly that it was like she had fifteen lungs inside her.
Lennie sat in her seat in complete shock, watching food and birds sail past her. Her dad always taught her not to waste food; he would be horrified to see this.
“This is all your fault, Estella!” Poppop cried.
“Me?!” she said. “You were the one who insisted on hosting this competition!”
“HOW DARE YOU! WHOM DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?”
“Who do you think YOU are?!”
“Don’t correct me!”
It was chaos. Absolute chaos. Food flying everywhere, birds pooping on people’s heads, limbs and hair tangled, cousins roaring, aunts and uncles screaming.
This was what Wizardmatch did.
Estella was right—it was all Poppop’s fault. The food fight, the competition, her misery, everything!
Lennie jumped up, mashing bread in her hands and rolling it between her palms—tighter and tighter until it made a giant bread ball. Then she pelted it across the room toward Poppop.
The bread hit him in the chest, and he stopped shouting, looking at it in shock as it bounced away.
All at once—like a switch had flipped inside her— Lennie grabbed everything she could see and started throwing it at Poppop: creamed spinach, rice pudding, napkins, soup, cheese wheels, a slab of steak. She smashed plates on the floor—shattered glasses, too. Every throw, every broken shard of ceramic on the floor, was a release.
She hurled pasta at Michael, for being so stuck up. She flung hardboiled eggs at Mom, for not understanding. She threw salmon at Ellington, for telling her to apologize and get over it. She attacked Anya, Ethan, Perrie, and Bo, whose birds kept pecking her head, trying to eat the food that covered her head-to-toe.
And they pummeled her right back with all combinations of nasty, smelly foods. But every hit jolted her. She was awake and alive and angry—
“THAT’S ENOUGH!” Poppop shouted, stamping his staff down so hard that the rubber ducky on top actually squeaked. A sparkly dust settled over the dining hall, and a film descended over her eyes. She was light-headed. Dizzy. Slowly, Lennie dropped the baked carrots in her hands.
Everyone quietly shuffled out of the dining hall to their bedrooms. The spell wore off once Lennie got back to Cheeseburger Chamber. She was caked with cake, crusted with crust, pickled in pickles—but she couldn’t stop shaking.
It was over.
Done.
She had nothing left—no great-uncle to train with. No mission to work for. No chance at being the Prime Wizard. Just this morning, she had hope and purpose, but not anymore.
As she tucked herself into bed, the food still stuck to her skin, she thought about Wizardmatch. When she had overheard that awful conversation between her mom and Poppop, she remembered thinking that her life couldn’t get any worse. But now she knew . . .
She was wrong.
Last Chance
The final Wizardmatch test was approaching. The days ticking up to that last hurrah were some of the most miserable of Lennie’s life.
Her mom was still treating her like a baby who couldn’t be left alone. The rest of the family either ignored her completely or gave her the stink-eye whenever they passed her in the hall. And Julien—who didn’t even wake up until two days later—whispered snide comments to Lennie whenever she was nearby.
And she and Michael remained frigidly silent. Whenever he wasn’t around, Lennie ached to talk to him. And whenever he was around, she only wanted to smash her fist into his face.
On the day of the third and final Wizardmatch test, Michael was gone before Lennie had even woken up. The castle was abuzz. Estella and Poppop were running about, hanging more MISSING FELINE posters all over the walls of the castle: Answers to Sir Fluffington the Fourth, Fluffles, or Fluffy Fluffy Poo Poo! Looks like a furry penguin! Will not come when you call him. Will not play fetch either (believe me, I’ve tried)!
While Poppop was distressed, it seemed like everyone else was excited for the final test. People were rushing to and from the dining room. Julien was stretching in the halls. Aunt Macy was feeding Victoria spoonfuls of mashed carrots and cooing, “Who’s my wittle-bittle champion? You are!”
“Len!” her mom called from seven stories up. “WAIT THERE. DO NOT MOVE. You need to be chaperoned!”
But Lennie didn’t wait for her mom to catch up. She skateboarded down as fast as she could and was out the door before her mother could shout LENNIE! yet again.
Outside the weather was hot and dry; the sun beat down and warmed her black hair. Lennie walked along the edge of the Pomporromp property, starting at the cliff where the first test had taken place—and strolling toward the borderlands. She sighed with every step and flashed invisible at random moments, in case her mom was watching. But she suspected that Mom had given up on her—and was getting Michael ready for the final round of Wizardmatch. That would certainly take precedence over babysitting Lennie.
Today was the day when a new Prime Wizard would be declared. And Lennie had utterly failed in her mission. Wizardmatch would just keep happening—again and again and again—from now until the end of time. She had no effect on the system. She changed nothing.
She wasn’t going to be the first female Prime Wizard. There probably wouldn’t be one in her whole lifetime. Poppop would get away with discriminating against her and the other girls. He already got away with it. Because he was in power, and everyone in the family wanted to stay on his good side.
Lennie trudged past the Garden of Goulash and wandered to the edge of the Pomporromp property. As she walked along the border, she thought about Great-Uncle Humphrey. She hadn’t heard from him since their fight. She doubted she’d ever hear from him again.
Maybe I should try to talk to him again, she thought. She reached a hand through the border—into the fuzzy darkness ahead. Then she took a steely breath and plunged forward, carefully scanning the ground for any new booby traps.
“Mortimer, you can’t be serious!” came Estella’s voice from some yards away. Clearly from inside the borderlands, too.
“I am as serious as a head injury after suffering a heart attack after breaking your arm.”
Lennie invisibled instantly. And a moment later, Poppop Pomporromp and Estella came strolling from around the bend.
“It’s so musty! We can’t have the third test in here! And besides, it’s too late to change the location. We’ve already told everyone that the last event is taking place inside the castle,” Estella said.
“We have to change it!”
“I’m just concerned you haven’t thought this through. If you haven’t found Fluffles, what makes you so certain they can? W
e don’t know if Fluffles is even in the borderlands! And what if one of the competitors falls into one of Madame Oglethorpe’s booby traps? Or one of yours?”
“Then they’ll have to escape,” Poppop said. They edged so close to Lennie that she held her breath. “If they want to be Prime Wizard, they have to know how to escape one tiny little booby trap, Estella! But we need to search for Sir Fluffington the Fourth. I am desperate! Whoever finds him truly deserves to be the next Prime Wizard!”
“And you’re sure you want to put a full mute on the candidates?” Estella said.
Poppop nodded. “Of course! It’s the only way to guarantee a fair test.”
Lennie’s fifteen seconds were up, and she tucked herself behind a tree.
“Then who will you follow?”
“Julien, of course,” Poppop said. “He’s the favorite to win.”
Lennie clenched her jaw and kept walking forward. She didn’t stop until she was at Uncle Humphrey’s Secret Cave of Secrets. Knocking on the rock wildly, Lennie shouted, “I have important information for you! Things you need to hear about the third Wizardmatch test! Open up!”
For a moment, she thought he was going to keep ignoring her. But at last, the rock split open in the middle, and Lennie scampered inside. She weaved her way through the geode, avoiding stalactites and stalagmites. And she reached the fire den at the end of the tunnel.
When her eyeballs adjusted, she saw Fluffles in a cell made of hard earth. And Uncle Humphrey frowning at her from a beanbag chair.
“Well?” he said. “What is this important information?”
“Don’t tell him, Lennie!” Fluffles cried. “Don’t reveal any of Mortimer de Pomporromp’s secrets!”
Lennie smiled at her great-uncle. “The third task is taking place in the borderlands.”
“Here?”
Lennie nodded. “They’re going to be looking for Fluffles!”
Wizardmatch Page 18